by KB Winters
Maybe I just needed to invest in a really good vibrator.
Chapter 6
Savior
Fucking women. Even if I lived to be ten thousand fucking years old, I’d never fucking understand them or how their brains worked. And Mandy went to the top of that damn list. I was furious, so pissed off with her, but every time I thought about why, about fucking her hard and fast up against that wall while she urged me on with dirty, passion-filled words, my cock sprang to life. Ready for a repeat performance.
But that wouldn’t happen. It shouldn’t have happened the first time and contrary to what she thought, I didn’t go there to fuck her. But how could I resist her, standing there all proud and strong, her gorgeous tits on display as she stepped in closer to me? I was just a man and goddammit, I couldn’t resist her. So I’d have to keep my distance.
If only I could.
Mandy was part of the Reckless Bastards family whether she wanted to be or not. Ammo was one of us, had always been one of us, and that meant she would always be one of us. Which is how I found myself parking my bike beside her little sedan and stomping up the steps to her apartment door, chipped with green paint, again. I knocked and waited, prepared for just about any response from her at this point. I’d be just as surprised to get a kick to the dick as a blowjob.
She opened the door and her green eyes narrowed as she looked me over from head to toe.
“Not interested.”
She stepped back and slammed the door but I caught the flimsy piece of wood easily. She stepped back, looking bored rather than scared.
“You said I don’t know you, don’t know shit about your life over the past few years and you were right.” I stepped inside and kicked her door shut. “Tell me.”
“No.”
I knew she wouldn’t be easy, but she had no idea how stubborn I could be if set my mind to it.
“Come on, tell me.”
I brushed past her and sat on the sofa, kicking my boots up and getting comfortable. The more she glared, the brighter my smile became.
“You hungry? I’ll order some pizza and wings. No, fuck wings, let’s get those spicy boneless things.”
I pulled out my phone and pulled up my favorite pizza place.
“Address,” I said, snapping my fingers at her and risking the health of my balls and my brain.
She rattled it off and then tossed a pillow at my head. “Jackass.”
“We’ve got about forty minutes until the food arrives, so why don’t you burn some calories by flapping that jaw?”
I dropped back down and crossed my legs on her wooden coffee table, while she glared a hole in the side of my head.
“Why are you doing this?” She stepped over my legs, giving me plenty of time to stare at her shapely legs.
“Seriously. What could you possibly get out of this?”
“I get a chance to fill a hole in my education, namely what you’ve been up to since I last saw you.”
She stared, eyes all squinty and hard, but the way her hair stood up straight everywhere lessened the effect.
“Why don’t you stop trying to figure out my motives and just tell me?”
Mandy was a stubborn thing, but she had nothing on me.
“Nothing to tell, really. I worked and then I hopped on a bus headed for the east coast. A little while later I started culinary school.”
“Did you always want to be a chef?”
I realized I knew nothing about her, aside from those care packages she used to send Ammo. “I knew you baked one hell of a cookie but Ammo never said you wanted to do it professionally.”
She shrugged but I saw the smile tug on the corners of her pouty mouth.
“I never really thought about it, but things weren’t how I wanted them to be here and I knew I had to get away before it was too late. I went to the library and applied for scholarships, but after taking an online aptitude test that said I could run a kitchen, that’s what I decided to do.”
She tried to make light of it, but I could tell it meant something to her.
“You love it.”
This time her smile was genuine as she nodded.
“I do. Food makes people happy and so does art, I get to do both every day.”
“The food you made for the engagement party was delicious. Best triple chocolate chunk cupcakes ever.”
A blush spread over her pale skin.
“Yeah, thanks.”
“What did you mean you had to get away before it was too late?” Her shoulders slumped, like I could forget something like that. The doorbell rang and she hopped up with a smile.
“I’ll get that,” she said, relief in her voice.
“I already paid,” I told her and smiled at the growl she let out. It was kind of sexy. I never had a woman growl at me before. Just like that my mind went to all the ways I could make Mandy growl some more.
“Did you invite people over?”
“No, why?”
Green eyes bugged way out, clearly telling me that I was an idiot, but again, the effect was ruined by her hair standing up everywhere.
“Because this is enough food for at least ten people, Savior.”
She set the box and the foam container on the table and disappeared into the kitchen.
“I don’t know what you were thinking.”
She returned with two plates and two beers.
“I was thinking that ten years is a long time to cover and we might get hungry walking down Memory Lane.”
She rolled her eyes. “You are so full of shit, you know that?”
Her words caught me off guard. “Damn, how many times did Ammo say that to me over the years?”
Just the way she had with a mix of incredulity and affection.
“Too many,” she agreed.
“So?” I dropped a slice onto both plates and waited for her to answer. “You gonna tell me what you did here that made you need to escape?”
She shook her head as she chewed. Her body language was casual and easy but a hard glint had returned to her eyes.
“Now you care? I seem to remember Ammo telling me, no promising me that if I needed anything to call you or the club,” she scoffed, shooting me finger quotes and rolling her eyes to show her disdain. “A lot of good that did me when you didn’t answer calls or stop in to check on me.”
I wanted to shout that she was wrong, but she wasn’t. We’d dropped the ball where she was concerned and now unease settled low in my gut like a ball of lead as I imagined the worst shit she could’ve gotten up to as a girl in sin city. But I needed to know. “So?”
“So you don’t get to know, Savior.” She shook her head like she was explaining something simple to an idiot. “You had a chance to know and you didn’t care. I did what I had to in order to survive, and I did. But that’s the past.”
I didn’t like it. Not one fucking bit, but I also knew she was right. I would let her hang on to her secrets, for now, but not for long. “Does how you survived have anything to do with those assholes in the parking lot?”
She nodded and nibbled her lip, her eyes dancing all around the living room, everywhere but at me. I knew she could feel the weight of my stare on her, mostly because less than two feet separated us, but also because I could see the pink stain on her skin and the way her pulse fluttered in her neck. “This chick I knew back then helped me get an I.D. so that I could . . .”
She paused and I thought I might have lost her but she picked up her story again.
“. . . take care of myself,” she said vaguely. Now that I’m back she wants me to do one more job for her and I won’t do it. Those assholes were trying to convince me to change my mind.”
Fuck, that was a lot worse than I thought. The guilt piled on top of my fear. We should have been there for her. If it had been any of us, Ammo would have barged in and made sure she had healthy fucking meals and did her homework. He would have been there in all the ways we hadn’t been for her. I knew what women did to survive in Vegas
, hell all around the world, and the thought she might have done that, made me sick to my stomach. Made my skin burn with anger. “You got more beer?”
She stood like she hadn’t just dropped a major fucking bomb that had my head spinning.
“Unlikely. Those two were a fluke,” she said as she disappeared into the kitchen again. “I have vodka and I have rum. There’s probably tequila in the freezer but you can’t have that. It’s mine.”
That pulled a laugh from me. “Stingy with your booze, Mandy?”
“Your guilt doesn’t deserve tequila. It gets rum or vodka, take your pick.” She held a bottle in each hand but my gaze was drawn to the stiff peaks of her nipples poking through the fabric of her shirt. My mouth watered.
“Fine, I’ll take the vodka.”
She sat on the floor across from me and grinned as she set the bottle and two tumblers on the table, haphazardly pouring odd amounts in each glass. “The first shot is the numbing agent.”
I eyed the so-called shot skeptically. “That’s at least two shots.”
“Okay booze police, drink what you can. Grandpa.”
Fuck that. I lifted the glass to my lips and let the cool liquid burn my insides. “At least it’s the good shit. Now, tell me what you did to survive.”
She grinned, the first genuine smile I’d seen from her in a long damn time. “Wouldn’t you like to know?”
“I would,” I told her seriously but she only grinned wider.
“First, you don’t get to know. Second, I’m not drunk enough to spill by accident.” She knocked back her shot and poured another as she reached for the spicy chicken. “Thanks to all this food, I’ll never be.”
“Oh don’t you worry about that sweetheart, I’ve gotten many a woman drunk in my day.” It would tease all of my patience to get her drunk and not fuck her again, but I was determined to do just that.
Secrets, yes. Sex, no.
I had this.
Chapter 7
Mandy
I couldn’t believe it. I was having a good time with Savior. A man who could be pretty damn charming when he wasn’t waking up with a big bag of regret. I found myself laughing more than I had in far too long. It was probably the vodka. Okay it was mostly the vodka, but it was also him. In my mind, Savior was still the unreliable man who’d ditched me the minute he’d gotten stateside and couldn’t be bothered with the boring details of being a teenager. That wasn’t him any more than the card-counting delinquent was still me.
I let the vodka do its thing, let it relax my mind and my body until the awkward disappeared and all that was left were two people connected by their memories and grief of the same person.
“He would be so thrilled with all the businesses you guys have.” Ammo was proud of the Reckless Bastards and to see them thriving the way Savior described, I could admit a certain warmth blossomed in my chest.
He grinned in that way he had that made him look almost like a boy. No, not a boy but just a man who didn’t have ghosts, demons. Skeletons. His eyes were clear and his smile wide. “We have Ammo O.G. that we grow ourselves. It’s our biggest seller, especially ‘cause it’s some kick ass weed.”
Now that would have tickled my brother like crazy. “I wish he could’ve seen that.”
I could see Ammo strutting around in what passed for heaven for guys like him, bragging about being a celebrity. It’d been a long time since I could think of my brother without sadness. Pouring the last of the vodka in our glasses, I held it up.
“To the best brother around. May he be shocking angels and heathens alike, wherever he is.”
“Damn straight,” Savior said and knocked the vodka back with a grimace. “It’s good to remember. Sometimes I forget it all. It’s easier.”
I sighed, nodding. “Most of the time I wish I could. I tried forgetting but now that it’s only me, I have to remember. If I ever have a family, they’ll want to know about how well my mom sang or how my dad did the best card tricks. They won’t know the dirty jokes that Ammo horrified me with when I was too young to hear them. So, I remember.”
For an uncertain future I wasn’t sure I even wanted.
“Are you drunk enough to spill your secrets yet?”
Just the sound of his voice, so deep and rumbly, made me smile. But a moment later as his question sank in, I felt the smile fade.
“No offense, but I’ll never be drunk enough for that.” It wasn’t a big secret, but it was mine and he’d given up the right to ask.
“Come on, how bad could it be? Prostitution?”
I laughed bitterly. “Yeah, right. If I’d done that we might have actually crossed paths back then.” It was no secret that the Reckless Bastards had been in on the ass business well before it became fashionable. With it now legalish, I was sure they made bank.
“That’s a fucking relief.” He smacked the sofa as his body sank deeper into it. “If it’s not that, just tell me.” He was insistent and the more he drank the more his guilt showed. Now that he knew I hadn’t been out there putting a price tag on my body, his guilt seemed to lessen, but not by much.
Good. He should feel guilty. I didn’t want him carrying some burden, but he and all the Reckless Bastards had let me down.
“Look Savior, I don’t need you to feel guilty for not keeping your promise to Ammo. I’m sure he wouldn’t either because everything turned out fine. Just drop it.”
“I really am sorry. There’s no excuse and I’m grateful I’ll never get the ass kicking I deserve from Ammo.”
“Don’t think you’re going to heaven?”
He laughed. “Sweetheart if I make it up there he can kick my ass daily.”
“At any rate, I don’t need your guilt so get over yourself.”
“Then why don’t you want anything to do with us?”
I shook my head. “Because I’m still not your responsibility. And even if you or any of the other Bastards think otherwise, I wouldn’t trust you to have my back anyway.”
“Damn.”
That one word held so much emotion, like a perfect bite of food. He was shocked, hurt even.
“You don’t pull any punches.”
“Well, you won’t stop pushing. Now you know what the deal is, you don’t have to keep checking up on me. I’ve learned how to take care of myself over the years.”
His dark brows rose suspiciously. “Even those goons from the parking lot?”
“They’re not the first goons I’ve come across.” But with any luck, they would be the last. Goons were all fine and good in the movies, in real life they were a lot dumber and ten times as dangerous. “Like I said, I can take care of myself.”
Savior tried to stand and stumbled. Since it was the first time he stood in hours it was clear he was drunker than he thought.
“Shit.”
He wobbled and pointed at me. “For the record sweet Mandy, I don’t do shit I don’t want to do.”
Savior dropped back down onto my sofa and I stood, scanning the room for a bucket even though I was pretty sure I didn’t have a bucket at all.
“Fine. Just lie down and don’t puke on my shit.” I pushed him onto his back and went to pour a cup of water. “Drink this.”
“I’m fine. Not the first time I’ve been drunk before, tough ass.”
I laughed and took off his ridiculously heavy motorcycle boots. At least I assumed they were the real article, but they could just as easily be a fashion statement.
“I’m not surprised but unlike your tree house, I care if you get puke all over my stuff.”
“Club house.”
“What?” He couldn’t be that drunk, could he? Not when I only had a nice buzz going.
“It’s a club house not a fucking tree house. We’re men, not elves.”
My whole body shook with laughter. “I don’t know, Savior, your club shares plenty of similarities with elves. The only real difference is your size.”
One eye popped open, as blue as the sky. “Am I that drunk or did you seriou
sly just compare my club to elves?”
“Both of those things are true, old man. You can sleep on the sofa until you’re sober enough to drive home.” I grabbed his chin until he opened both eyes and yeah, he was beautiful but that wasn’t the point. “But I don’t need you to check up on me, okay?”
He nodded and as I stepped back two big arms wrapped around me and pulled me down onto him.
“You talk too much,” he said and then speared both hands through my short hair and kissed me like I was his favorite brand of biker whiskey.
I should have pulled back, but I didn’t. I couldn’t. He tasted too good, felt too fucking good with his hard body pressed up against mine. I wished we were naked because he was growing harder by the second and my body was hot, wet and ready. But we weren’t doing that. Fuck.
“That’s a novel way to shut someone up.”
He flashed a lazy grin, his eyes still closed as his thumb brushed my jaw. “I check up on you because I want to. I fucked you because you’re hot and I will fuck you again,” he grinned but it was softer, and I knew he was seconds from passing out. “And again.”
I slid off his body as soon as his deep, even breaths sounded. Grabbing the debris from the table and putting it away before I closed myself up in my bedroom. I slid into the bed and clenched my knees tight beneath my comforter as I drifted off to sleep, telling my body not to think or dream about the big, blue-eyed devil asleep on my sofa.
Yeah, sometimes my body could be a real bitch.
***
“You want time off?” Landry’s voice bellowed just as he meant it to. He loved to draw attention whenever he could, but especially when he wanted to humiliate someone. It was how he got his chubby little cock hard.
“I’m asking for next Saturday off, yes.” With my arms crossed, I stood with a blank expression on my face and waited for him to respond.
“Get a load of hot shit Sutton, guys. She wants Saturday off, our busiest day.” He laughed, clutching his swollen gut as his dark eyes glared at me. “Do you have a fancy Hollywood party to go to where you pretend you and only you are responsible for the delicious confections that come out of my kitchen?”
