by Blake, Penny
“You’re still a virgin, aren’t you?” he asked in time with the pumping of his fingers.
I nodded, a soft mewling cry coming from my mouth of its own accord.
“Are you sure?” he asked.
“So sure,” I said, spreading my legs wider for him, my hips rising off the bed.
“It’s going to hurt,” he said. I could feel him stretching me wider by adding a third finger, as if preparing me for what was to come.
I reached down and squeezed his manhood. “Don’t care. I need this. Now. Open me up.”
He positioned himself between my knees, and I felt the blunt pressure of his tip against my opening. He battered me with a series of slow thrusts, going inside a little deeper each time, his cock growing slicker with my juices with every push-pull.
Just when the pressure began to sting, he pulled back and entered me with a strong stroke. It tore and ached. There was just too much of him.
I closed my eyes against the pain, tears seeping out of my eyes.
“Shhh,” he said, stroking the hair from my face, kissing away my tears. “It’ll be okay. Just relax. Relax around me.”
He didn’t move. He just remained inside me, perfectly still. Peppering my face and neck with tender kisses.
Slowly the pain began to recede. Little by little at first, and then all at once.
My muscles seemed to relax, and he began to rock against me slowly. Where pain had once been, pleasure began to bloom.
He didn’t move hard or fast. His strokes were slow and deliberate.
His thrusting seemed to go on and on, and I began to savor the delicious sensation of him inside my body. Rubbing my channel with the thick ridge of his cock.
His girth stretching me in all the right ways.
Being enclosed in his powerful arms, with so much delicious male on top of me and inside me, splitting me open with infinite tenderness.
I reached up and placed my palm on his ass, reveling at the way his muscles undulated. In his face was the same pleasure-pain I’d seen there before, but now I felt it too.
Gradually his rhythm grew faster, though I could still tell by the tension in his muscles and the way his jaw ticked that he was holding back. Trying not to hurt me.
At last he delivered one final, punishing thrust and came in a flood of molten heat. Inside me, his cock spasmed, releasing pump after pump of his hot seed.
Then I felt him withdraw, leaving me empty without him.
Before I could protest, his fingers were stroking up and down the seam of my sex. Our fluids intermingled now and I was impossibly slick, which only intensified the delicious sensations his fingers were creating.
He carefully inserted a finger, and I realized I was torn and sore. But it was a good kind of pain, because it marked me as his.
His fingers fluttered over my inner and outer lips, circled my clit, and teased my passage. Again and again they moved over me, stoking my pleasure higher.
Delicious warmth built and expanded.
Then something burst inside me, sweet bliss radiating through my limbs and shooting straight through my heart.
I bucked off the bead, moaning with pleasure as his fingers slowed, gently bringing me down.
As I lay panting in his arms, I closed my eyes, burying my head in his chest. “Please don’t leave me again, Blaze. Please,” I whispered.
“Never again,” he swore. “Never, ever again.” And with that, I drifted off into a deep, dreamless sleep.
Chapter 9
Blaze and I had our own cars, but for the first time, we started riding to school together. He would drive us in the mornings, and I would find him waiting for me to get out of my last class of the day so we could drive home together too.
We spent every night in one of our rooms, sometimes staying up all night fucking over and over again. Exploring each other’s bodies. Pushing the limits of our desire. Seeing how many times we could get each other off in a single night.
In the daylight, we would hide this thing between us, saving it for the darkness of our rooms.
Blaze didn’t see any reason not to make our relationship public, but he’d always been the bolder one who didn’t care what other people thought.
I didn’t want the gossip, the odd looks, the questions. I’d waited so long to be happy like this that I wanted to keep it to ourselves a little longer. Just for now. Until we knew what it was. Until I had time to make sense of all the crazy emotions swirling through me, making me feel high and out of control with lust all the time.
Sometimes it was hard to keep my hands off of Blaze in the car, and more than once, I’d reached down and jerked him off in the school parking lot.
But most days, as we rode to school we simply talked. Most of our conversations were about where we wanted to go after graduation, which would be here in just a few months.
Blaze and I both wanted to travel to Europe. I wanted to tour Italy and see Michelangelo’s paintings on the ceiling of the Sistine Chapel. Blaze wanted to drive on the Autobahn and visit the red light district in Amsterdam. I was fully on board with both destinations, but only if he would take the train to Paris so I could spend the whole day reading books and sipping coffee in a quaint Paris café. He loved that idea, and came up with ten more things to do while we were in France.
Every day we’d talk about where we would go, weaving together dreams I never knew I had. Connecting with Blaze like that, I finally felt alive for the first time. Because now I understood what it felt like to love fully, truly and unconditionally.
Little did I knew that in just three months, when the late winter snow gave way to green sprouts pushing through the dark earth, my whole world would shatter.
Present day…
Blaze and I kiss each other hungrily in his car. He’s parked on a side street in Manhattan a few blocks away from the luxury hotel where he stays when he’s here on business.
I can’t tear myself away from him long enough to get out of the passenger seat and walk to the hotel. He seems to have the same problem. We’ve been necking like teenagers for the past fifteen minutes.
I can’t help it. With each kiss, I remember a love truer than anything I’ve felt since.
I must have blocked this out, how good he feels, because I couldn’t have it. Because now that I have him in my arms again, it’s as if some lost pieces of me have clicked back into place.
“As good as this feels, I need to get you into a bed before I take you in the car,” he says against my lips. “I’ve waited years for this. I can’t wait any more.”
I make a small whimper of assent. It’s all I can manage. Then I get out of the car and we both walk down the bright New York City sidewalk that will lead us to his hotel.
Maybe it’s the cool air bringing me to my senses. Or simply knowing that once we get into that hotel room, there’s no going back.
But I understand with complete certainly that once I make love to Blaze again, his power to hurt me will return tenfold. I’ll feel just as broken as I did all those years ago, but it’ll be worse, because this time I would have known better.
And then it all comes crashing back to me. The years I spent lost because of him. All the pain I lived through before I could even think about trying to fall in love again.
I stop in my tracks.
A moment later, Blaze notices I’m lagging behind and stops too, turning to face me. “What’s wrong?” he asks.
“I can’t do this, “I say. “Blaze…you’re engaged. To another woman.” I shake my head. “I can’t do this. It’s wrong for everyone involved, most importantly me.”
Blaze pulls his cell phone out of his pocket. “Let me call and break it off with her then. Because there’s no way I’m letting you go again.”
“That’s not a very nice way to treat your fiancé, Blaze.”
He looks at me, torn, and then nods. He slips his phone back into his pocket. “My fiancée is a wonderful woman, but she deserves someone who can give her his whole
heart. And as much as I’d love to do that, I can’t, because it’s always belonged to you.”
“Those sound like pretty words that a man uses to get women into bed. I’m not seventeen anymore, Blaze. I know how these things work. I was at your engagement party. You’re taken, and you’re probably just getting cold feet about the marriage, and now I’m a convenient excuse to—“
“Stop it, Jess. I’ve been dating Lisa for two years. I’ve been in love with you since I was in eighth grade. You’re more than some side chick I’m trying to screw, alright? I know you want to trivialize it—this thing between us that neither of us has ever been able to shake. It’s because you’re scared, and I’m scared too. But since I saw you again at my party, I just knew, Jess. We belong to each other. And I dare you tell me differently, because if you do, you’re a liar.”
I open my mouth to argue, but I know that he’s right, so I just stand there, unable to form a response.
He leans in close and bends down so we’re eye to eye. “I understand completely if you don’t want to go to that hotel room with me while I’m engaged. But I’ll tell you this right now, I’m not going to be engaged for much longer, and when I’m free, you’re mine. Do you understand?”
His words and the intensity in his expression are almost too much to bear. All I can do is nod.
“Good, then let’s go back the car. I’ll take you home.”
The thought of getting back in his car, where I’d just kissed him until we were panting for breath, it too much.
My chest feels tight and I’m ready to go home, to be alone where I can try and make sense of this whole crazy night. “That’s okay,” I say, taking a step toward the curb. “I’ll just get a cab.”
“Come on, Jess.” He holds his hands out, defeated. “Let me take you home.”
“I’d rather take a cab.” I hold up my hand and a yellow cab pulls up immediately. “Thank you though. For everything. But I need to go.” I open the taxi door and rush in, closing it before Blaze can stop me.
Chapter 10
Ten years earlier…
It was graduation day, but what I was looking forward to most was the party afterwards. Normally I didn’t care much for parties, but Blaze and I were going together, so it almost felt like a date.
I hoped I could keep my hands off him in public, but even if I couldn’t, it didn’t seem to matter much anymore. After today, we’d both be out of school—out of this town—so who cared what people thought?
One of the few people whose opinion mattered to me was Mirabeth’s, and I was pleased that she would be in the bleachers of our high school auditorium watching Blaze and I get our diplomas in just a few hours.
As we ate breakfast, she chattered excitedly about the dress she was going to wear. It was red and she planned to wear a lot of gold jewelry, to match our school colors.
She and I were eating breakfast together at the table when Blaze walked in looking sullen. Since he and I had gotten together, we all started eating breakfast together, though we were careful to keep all signs of our relationship hidden from Mirabeth.
“What’s wrong, Blaze?” I asked, nibbling a forkful of eggs.
He sat down at the table, slumping back in the chair. Then he reached into his pocket and produced a folded check, tossing it on the table. “That’s what’s wrong.”
I picked up the check and unfolded it. It was made out to Blaze from the Arthur and June Everly trust—our parents. It was signed by the executor of the trust, Raine Everly.
“A check for two thousand dollars.” I shrugged. “So?”
“So you can expect the same thing—that’s our travelling money until we turn twenty five or graduate from college, Jess. That’s all he’s giving us to travel, so I guess we can kiss our European tour goodbye.”
I stared at the check in confusion. “But he said he’d give us enough to travel. He said he wouldn’t pay out the lump sum until we graduated college or hit twenty five, but he’d give us enough to get by on while we explored the world and figured out where we wanted to go.”
“Well apparently he thinks that we should have a realistic understanding of money, so he’s only giving us two thousand dollars each until we enroll in college. He said if we want to continue our travels after spending the money he gave us, we’d need to work for it. Otherwise, once this is gone, we’re cut off until we meet his terms.”
I picked up my plate and took it to the sink, tossing it down so hard it broke in two. “That’s such bullshit. It’s our money—we’re not even related to him. What right does he have to set a bunch of arbitrary rules for us? He doesn’t even want us here! Yet here he is acting like we’re some entitled rich kids who need a lesson in what life is really like. He seems to have forgotten that we spent our whole lives with severely alcoholic parents who didn’t give two shits about us—who died. Being able to travel is the one good thing they gave to us, the one thing I’ve ever looked forward to. And that bastard is taking it away.”
Mirabeth looked back and forth between us, sadness in her eyes. She let out a heavy breath. “I truly believe he’s trying to help you both in his own odd way,” she said. “All his life, he’s only had is his work. And the Everly’s. But their love was all wrapped up in his taking over the family business, and so he has a way of equating work with love.
I believe he’s trying to ensure that you both end up provided for—ideally at the family company. He’s trying to do the best thing for you both. He’s just being a little heavy-handed about it is all.”
“A little heavy-handed?” Blaze scoffed.
“I would offer to talk to him, but he and I aren’t close, I’m afraid,” she said. “He never opened up to me the way that you two have. I know he’s a very stubborn man, and I think you might consider one simple trip to another country instead of a year traveling. You’ll be twenty five before you know it, so perhaps in the meantime, you can work with Raine and make a place for yourselves at the company.”
My heart sunk in disappointment, and I saw the same feeling mirrored in Blaze’s expression. For months we’d talked endlessly about all the places we wanted to go and all the sights we’d see together.
It wasn’t just about seeing more of the world and broadening our experiences. It was also about finally being free. Free to go where we wanted, when we wanted, and search for happiness together instead of having our lives dictated by others.
And just like that, Raine had torn it away from us.
“No,” I said. “That’s our money, and this is something we’ve decided to do. He has no right to do this to us.”
“I told him all that, Jess.” Blaze shook his head. “He wouldn’t listen.”
“He’ll listen to me,” I said. “Is he up in his office now?”
“I called him a car a little earlier,” said Mirabeth. “But he’ll be back tonight, after the graduation ceremony and before your party.”
“Good,” I said. “I’ll talk to him then.”
I had never told Blaze about the spanking incident in Raine’s office. The whole thing was very strange, including my own reaction, and it had taken me a while to process it.
But I knew that it had been as sexually exciting for him as it was for me. I knew by the way he’d watched me swimming naked in the pool that night that he was attracted to me, and I planned to use that attraction to get what I wanted.
I wasn’t going to sleep with him, but I wasn’t afraid to call him out on his feelings for me. In a way, I wondered if he was holding back the money to get me to offer myself in exchange for it.
Would he do something so wrong?
Tonight I would find out, and I would get him to see reason.
Our graduation ceremony passed in a flurry of boring speeches and a long roll call of names.
There was only one thing about the whole production that truly held my interest. The guy sitting next to me in a gold graduation gown that complemented my red one. We had the same last name so we were assigned seats next to e
ach other.
Blaze.
He was still in a bad mood, but he reached over and held my hand through the entire ceremony anyway. I didn’t know if anyone noticed, and I didn’t care.
Blaze and I were about to put this whole difficult chapter behind us and start a much more enjoyable one. I just had to convince Raine not to stand in our way.
I hoped it wouldn’t be too hard.
I looked up in the bleachers for Mirabeth, and I soon spotted her little yellow head and her bright red dress. I waved and she waved back.
Even though Raine had put a damper on our graduation day with his stupid new terms for receiving our inheritance, I was grateful that we at least had Mirabeth.
“Oh my God,” Blaze said, his free hand pointing out toward the bleachers where friends and family sat watching. “I think Mirabeth has a sign.”
I looked out at the audience where she was holding up a large handmade sign that said, “Congratulations Blaze and Jess!!!!” in gold glitter.
None of the other parents had signs and a few of them looked at her in confusion.
“Does she think this is a sporting event?” I whispered, trying to hold back my smile.
Blaze shook his head, clearly baffled.
Just then the principal called Blaze’s name and he walked up to the podium to get his diploma. I was called right after him so I followed behind at a short distance.
Mirabeth was now whooping it up in the bleachers, even pulling out an air horn and blowing it loudly, much to the annoyance of everyone sitting around her.
It was then I realized just how much I’d grown to love the woman. While most kids would be mortified to have a parent making such a big embarrassing spectacle at their graduation, I loved every second of it. For the first time in my life, I had a parental figure making a big fuss about a major life event, and it was wonderful.
I sat back down in my chair and waved my diploma at Mirabeth, and she blew her air horn again in response. Laughing, I turned to Blaze and saw something I didn’t experience very often at all. He was laughing too.
