by J. L. Beck
The chances of surviving this horrible predicament seem slimmer and slimmer everyday...and still…when I close my eyes, I see myself with Damon, celebrating a life I know we will never be able to live.
A life full of love and laughter—full of happiness.
12
Damon
I don’t want to lose it, but I feel the blackness closing around me. This is why feelings never work. Why I promised myself I would never fall for a woman.
My thoughts are twisted and warped, mixing with my past. I know I need to care for Keira, but she makes it so fucking hard when she doesn’t listen—when she’s so naive and kind. It literally kills me to bring her into the darkness.
She rests against the passenger window. Her eyes are closed, and she looks as if she is sleeping. I grip the steering wheel, trying to cool my heated blood, trying to stop myself from losing it.
I keep the fury contained long enough to make it home, and as soon as I park and get out, I lose it. I unleash myself against the brick exterior of the house. My fists slam into the unforgiving brick over and over. The pain reminds me I am in fact human, and very capable of breaking bones.
Blood starts dripping down my fists, but I don’t stop until I’ve taken the edge off the top and first layer of skin of my knuckles. My chest heaves as I suck precious oxygen into my lungs. I turn around and see Keira waiting for me. Her eyes are sad, dull, and I wish like hell they were sparkling with excitement or desire—hell, even fear would be a better emotion than the one I am seeing right now.
“Why did you lie to me?”
She averts her gaze, and the gesture gives her away, confirming she lied.
When she doesn’t answer, I start up the front steps and open the door, swinging it wide. She follows behind like a meek little mouse. I slam the door shut, then turn on her—right as she’s taking her shoes off.
“Were you planning to run again? I thought we were past that, Keira. I thought you wanted my protection?”
Tears well in her eyes, threatening to spill over and down her cheeks.
“I…” she croaks, her voice full of unknown emotion.
“You what? You thought it’d be better? Easier to run from your problems?” I squeeze my eyelids shut, frustration and anger coursing through my veins, threatening to break through to the surface. I run my fingers through my hair, pulling hard against the strands. I take a step toward Keira and watch as she retreats a step.
“Is that what you were doing? Running? Did you think you could get away from me again?” I close the space between us in a second. My hands grip her hips with a bruising touch, and I stare straight into her brown eyes.
“I’d never run from you, Damon. Not again.”
My eyes trail over her beautiful face, her tired eyes, and down over her body. The air around us sizzles as soon as my eyes land on her throat.
The faint bruises on her creamy white skin stick out like a sore thumb. I lift my eyes to her face and see fear rattling around inside her. She’s scared shitless, and I doubt I’ll get an answer out of her about who did this—even if I ask.
The sound of my phone ringing in my pocket angers me. I don’t want to answer right now. I just want to make Keira tell me who the fuck I need to kill. I grab my phone anyway, nearly breaking the fucking thing when I see the name flash across the screen.
I lift my gaze to Keira once more—fresh tears have fallen on her cheeks, and I don’t know how she still has more tears inside her. Suddenly, everything falls into place, and I make the connection. The reason why she would lie to me…why she is so fucking afraid right now… why there are bruises around her neck—like someone was choking her.
“He did this, didn’t he? Xander. He put his fucking hands on you.”
Keira’s wide-eyed expression confirms my assumption.
I'm unsure how the bastard got into the club without anyone knowing, but it’s clear he planted that bastard in her apartment to distract me. Or maybe he didn't, and I was just too fucking concerned with killing some fucker instead of protecting her. Either way, I feel like a pile of shit for not being there for her.
Pulling Keira into my arms, I press soft kisses against her throat, over the bruises my piece of shit brother left on her skin.
“I will kill him for this, Keira. I will kill him,” I whisper against her flesh, and she sobs into my chest.
“He told me not to say anything,” she mutters. “Why didn’t you tell me he was your brother?”
I can feel the fragile trust blooming between us wither away.
“Xander and I might share some blood, but I don’t consider him my brother. I didn’t tell you because I didn’t think it mattered. It doesn't change anything. I’ll kill him for hurting you.”
Some of the tension disappears from her body as she relaxes into my touch—as if she knows this is where she belongs. I bend down to pick her up, and her arms snake around my neck and her legs wrap around my midsection, holding on to me tightly. I can feel her warmth seep into me.
I carry her down the hall and into my bedroom, placing her gently on my bed.
“I’m going to call back Xander.”
I use the seconds it takes to pull my phone out and dial his number to compose myself—to the best of my ability.
I want nothing more than to scream all the ways I plan on killing him, but I know that would be a bad move…so I rein in my fury for a moment. Taking a deep, calming breath, I wait for him to answer.
It rings, and ring, then his asshole voice filters through the phone speaker.
“Damon, I’ve been trying to reach you. I even came by the club once, but I seem to keep missing you.”
I clench my fist. This fucker thinks he’s sneaky. Has he forgotten I know him—far more than anyone else? That he can’t fool me?
“What do you want, Xander?”
He chuckles. “I can’t simply call you and have a conversation? I do miss you little brother. It’s probably time we catch up.”
“Don’t pretend you have any emotions, Xander. We both know better, and I’d much rather discuss this over the phone…so just tell me what you want.”
“This isn’t something we can discuss over the phone. I’m afraid I’ll need to see you and Keira in the flesh. So please don't make this a hassle, dear ol’ brother. Meet me tomorrow at the Rossi Mansion. I assume you still know where that is?”
“Yes, we’ll be there. And, Xander, if you ever lay a finger on my property again, I will gut you like a fish,” I growl and hang up the phone, trying to forget my fucking brother and think about nothing besides the goddess lying in my bed.
There's no saying what will happen tomorrow—or what my brother will do to her…or me. I've seen his darkness, tasted it even, but I don’t want Keira to see it.
I’m distracted from my thoughts when she sits up, her eyes boring into mine. She looks at me like she wants to say something but instead she stands in front of me. Grabbing the hem of her shirt, she pulls it over her head. Then she reaches behind and undoes her bra. I’m so mesmerized that I just stand there and watch her. Her nice perky tits are free now, and her nipples are pointing at me.
I’ve seen a lot of girls take their clothes off. I own a fucking strip club for God’s sake. But this has to be the sexiest fucking striptease I’ve ever seen. Her eyes never leave mine. She is completely fixated on me while she slowly undoes her pants and pulls them down, taking her panties with them.
“I want you tonight. I want you to fuck me,” she mutters, standing in front of me completely naked now.
“Who knows what’s going to happen tomorrow. It’s not set in stone, and after everything, I don’t want to waste any more time.”
Everything she says is true, but that doesn’t mean I want to admit it.
“I’ll protect you tomorrow and any other fucking day of the year. That’s what’s going to happen. As for the future, we’ll take it one step at a time.”
I keep a small amount of distance between us, afraid that if I get too close
, I'll swallow her whole. She’s mouthwatering, and I want to possess her, own her, but not under these circumstances. I don’t want her to do this because she is scared.
“I don’t care. I still want you. I want it to be you.” She takes a step toward me and starts unbuttoning my shirt.
Her hands are a little shaky, but she has a smile on her face. She is nervous, but not scared of me. She knows I won’t hurt her. Still, I feel the need to say it out loud.
“We’ll go slow. I’ll try not to hurt you, and if you ever want me to stop, just say the words and I will.” I push a few strands of hair from her face as she gets done unbuttoning my shirt. She shoves it off my shoulders and lets it fall to the floor.
“But know we don't have to do this. We don't have to do anything today.”
Her cheeks a soft pink, and her eyes filled with arousal and excitement, she whispers, “Shut up and kiss me.”
I’m not used to following commands, but I am willing to make an exception today, and I obey. Leaning down, I press my lips to hers. She is close enough now that her pebbled nipples rub against my bare chest. There is no other feeling like her body against mine. My cock springs to life in response—so ready to finally be inside her.
It’s caught between us, pressing firmly against her flat belly. I nip at her lips, urging her to open to me. When she does, my tongue slips inside, swirling around her mouth, mingling with her tongue, tasting her.
I kiss her like that for a long time, tasting her, trailing my fingers up and down her arms. I want this to be perfect for her. I might not be able to save her from all the bad in this world, but I can give her this moment. I can make certain it’s all she ever thought it would be.
When I finally pull away, Keira is breathless. Her eyes peer up at me with adoration. I can see she feels safe in my arms, and I never want that to change. With a soft smile, I ease her onto the bed, watching her face as I do.
“I’m going to make this good for you—so fucking good for you, baby,” I whisper against her skin, peppering kisses over her throat, collarbone, and chest. Anger flickers inside me as I notice the bruises again, then I move my lips lower.
I take one of her hard nipples into my mouth, swirling my tongue around the tip, and she arches her back off the bed. Her hands make their way into my hair, holding my face against her tit.
I wonder if I could make her fall apart with nothing more than my tongue on her nipple. I smile against her skin, saving it for another day. When I release her tit with a pop, I knead her other breast, rolling the nipple between two fingers, giving them equal attention.
By the time I pull my hands away, she’s panting, her eyes are dilated, and I’d bet anything if I dipped my finger inside her she’d be wet as the fucking ocean.
Stripped of my shirt already, I shuck my pants and boxers in one swoop and drop down to my knees, gripping Keira by the ankles and pulling her ass to the very edge of the mattress.
Propping herself up on her elbows, she licks her lips and eyes me, looking like a vixen.
“You going to watch me devour your pussy?” I growl, a possessiveness overtaking me. She belongs to me.
Mine.
The word vibrates inside my head, but I don’t think about what it means.
Without warning, I dive between her legs like a starved man. My fingers sink into her smooth flesh, and she lifts her hips with every lick of my tongue—as if she knows exactly what she fucking needs.
“Damon...” she gasps, her head falling back against the mattress. I smirk against her perfect pink pussy and grip her ass, lifting her hips upward, alternating between long licks and sucking on her little clit.
It doesn’t take long for her to start thrashing against the sheets. Pants and moans escape her lips, but I keep up my relentless pace until she falls off the fucking edge. Her pussy quivers, and her delicious sweet cream coats my tongue.
Her legs are still shaking, and her eyes are squeezed closed when I press a finger against her soaked entrance. The thick digit enters her easily. Fuck, how I wish it was my cock claiming her right now and not my finger.
I take a couple calming breaths, reminding myself it will be worth it.
Soon…so fucking soon.
I need her panting, soaked to the bone, and primed for my cock.
“You’re so beautiful when you come.” I nudge her legs wide and slowly insert a second finger, scissoring them. She mewls, placing her arm over her mouth—as if she’s worried the whole neighborhood may hear.
“Be loud, baby. Scream if necessary. Tell everyone how much you love the things I do to your body.” I want to hear her. I want to watch her face as she falls apart again and again. I want to swallow every last drop of her cum.
Using my thumb, I rub fast circles against her clit, all while moving two fingers in and out of her tight hole. My cock throbs, and all the blood in my body roars to life, beckoning me to take her. I push the need down and continue fingering her, bringing her closer and closer to oblivion with each stroke. Only a few more moments pass, and she’s coming again. Her orgasm drips down my hand as her pussy tightens around my fingers, damn near squeezing the life out of them.
My own chest heaves, and when I ease my fingers out, I bring them to my lips and taste her sweetness one last time before I move above her.
Keira opens her eyes. The brown is brighter than I’ve ever seen it. Need and desire shine in her eyes. The look she wears gives me confirmation that she wants me, and I know she is ready now.
Her pussy is slick, prepared to accommodate my cock.
I move her back up the bed, making sure there’s enough space to climb on top of her. She watches every move I make like a hawk. Fear and nervousness is absent. There is only excitement and anticipation in her eyes—as if the moment can’t happen fast enough for her...when I want the damn moment to last forever.
With my entire body hovering inches from hers, I feel an electric charge between us. An invisible force is begging us to join, pulling our bodies together like we are magnetic.
“I’ll be as gentle as I can. If at any time you want me to stop, you tell me...okay?” I take her by the chin, making certain she hears every word.
When I release my hold, she nods. “I won’t stop you, Damon. I want you. I want this. I want it so badly, it hurts.”
Her words slam into my heart, ripping off the Band-Aid from a wound that never healed. She needs me. She wants this...wants me. And I can’t say I’ve ever had a woman want me for the unapologetic bastard I am.
As I fist my cock in my hand, I stare deep into her eyes, knowing love truly is an incredible emotion.
And I’m pretty fucking close to feeling it.
13
Keira
He looks at me like he wants to consume and cherish me all at once. I can feel how much he wants me…wants this moment between us. And I wish like hell that I could stop time just for us—so we can enjoy this moment again and again.
Damon’s body shakes as if it’s taking an extreme amount of effort not to slam inside me. It feels like we’ve been waiting to do this forever—which is ridiculous. I only met Damon days ago. How is it possible I feel so strongly? It feels like he knows me better than anyone.
I think the most important thing is that I feel like I’m the only one who knows him—the real him…the man beneath the mask he slips on every day. He shows bits and pieces of the person he really is. The man he thrives to be.
Pressing between my legs, he exhales a shaky breath. He looks on edge—like if I reach out and touch him, he might cut me. But it’s a risk I’m willing to take. I’ll travel into the dark with him if it means he comes out a better man.
He leans down, keeping most of his weight on one arm. The feel of his body on mine leaves me panting with need. He kisses me again. His lips are possessive and heated and I want to take my hand and hold his lips to mine, but I also want him to slip inside me.
I moan into his mouth, begging him to take me. I can feel him guiding himself
to my wet slit, and I lift my hips to meet his touch. The silky, smooth head of his thick cock is right at my entrance, and I shudder remembering how he made me come like this yesterday.
My hands snake around his huge body, my fingers digging into his shoulder, urging him to come closer. His skin is so soft and warm beneath my touch. I don’t want an inch of space between us. Even the air separating us feels like too much.
Damon swoops down, pressing his lips against mine. He kisses me deeply, taking my mouth like a starved man. I melt farther into the mattress, my softness rubbing against all his hard edges. He ends the kiss and places his forehead against mine.
We’re both panting. Desire pools deep in his eyes, and he hitches my leg up, guiding his cock straight toward my pussy. He enters me slowly, his body quivering as he exhales a calming breath.
“Keira,” he pants. “You feel like heaven.”
I can see how much he wants me—how much he wants this. Swiveling his hips, he moves a couple more inches inside.
My body stretches farther to accommodate his huge cock, and I gasp slightly, my chest constricting from the fullness. I’ve never felt anything like this before. I suck my bottom lip into my mouth to stifle a whimper.
Will he be able to fit?
Damon shifts his head and places it in the crook of my neck. I can hear him inhale as if he’s trying calm himself.
“Fuck, Keira, you’re so tight,” Damon whispers against my hair as he works himself deeper inside me—until I feel him at the back of my channel. As soon as he’s fully seated, he stills, allowing me to adjust to his length.
There’s a slight burning and an overwhelming fullness consuming me, but there is far less pain than I ever expected.
“Baby,” he hisses. “I’ve got to start moving soon.”
I can tell he’s barely holding on. I feel the need pulsing through him.
“I’m okay…move. It doesn’t hurt. I just feel full.” My voice comes out as nothing more than a breath.
A deep growl that sounds more animal than human rips from Damon’s throat, and holy hell, he finally starts to move.
