“Yes, Brooke. It sure does. So on the list was to spend the day at Disney World, huh?”
“Yeah, and to stay and watch the fireworks. How are you and work?”
“It’s fine, dad still wants to retire and have me take over the business. His best friend, Jack, also wants to take it over. I’m not even sure this is the business I want to be in. Brooke, I’m not even sure this is the best place for us. Other than our family, there isn’t much here for us.”
“I know what you mean. We’ll have to talk about this when I get home. Don’t worry, we’ll figure something out. I need to get back in there with Emma.”
“I love you; have fun and hurry home.”
“Good night, Boo. I love you.”
Chapter Four: Moving Forward
Emma
While Brooke is outside on her phone, I take the box of mail into my bedroom to begin to sort through it. It’s been four years, and I had no idea these letters were even here. I know the first year I lived in a blur: a fog. Everyone in Max’s platoon sent letters of condolence, some mentioned happy memories of Max and some mentioned memories of the way Max led the squad and always inspired them. The next two years I spent going back to school full-time and this past year I spent trying to decide the best road for James and me. Thankfully Max left us money and we also get survivors benefits; James and I will get a monthly check. I lived with my parents so money wasn’t an issue.
A knock sounds at my door before it opens slowly. “May I come in?”
“Come on, you don’t have to ask.”
Brooke slowly walks into the room and sits at the foot of the bed.
“Everything all right at home?”
“Fine, what are you doing?”
“Just walking down memory lane.”
“How is it?”
“Full of memories,” I giggle. “Did you pack these away, too? I don’t know how I didn’t know these were here, until now.”
“After the memorial service and you moved out, there was a large mail delivery for you and I just mailed it with some other items that was left behind to the forwarding address your mom gave me.”
“Look at this stack of letters for James.”
Brooke picks up the 12 or 15 letters and smiles. “He wants them all opened on different birthdays. It’s like he knew he wasn’t coming home.”
“I know. It gives me chills, thinking about it. There are even some letters for me from his platoon.”
Brooke looks through the opened stack of letters and finds one from Brice. “May I?”
I look at the letter she is holding up. “Please.”
She removes the letter from the envelope and carefully unfolds it.
Emma and James, Words cannot express my heartfelt sadness at Max’s passing. To know I was there with him and couldn’t do anything for him will forever haunt me. Emma, he was my hero and the noblest man I knew. He kept the morale up when we were at our lowest. To know him makes me a better person. He spoke of you and James daily and talked of the wonderful life he had planned for you both when he returned home. Max died saving his entire platoon. He walked into a booby-trapped building to check for its safety. He must have triggered a wire and that’s when the bomb detonated. Emma, I owe him my life. If you need anything, anything at all, please let me know. I loved him like my brother and I love you and James like family. Brice.
Brooke sniffles and I look away. I wipe away the tears on my cheek.
“I didn’t know he wrote this. I’m sorry, Emma.”
“Don’t be sorry, it’s very sweet.” I sniffle. “It feels good to know that Max loved me and James as much as he did. Even in death, I am reminded of how much he loved us.”
“What’s that saying? Better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all,” Brooke says, folding up the letter.
“Words have never been truer,” I say.
“What are your plans for tomorrow?” Brooke asks.
“I don’t have any. I think after today James is going to want to have a lazy day at home. Did you want to do something?”
“I saw some open houses in your neighborhood for houses for sale. How about for the fun of it, we go to some of those?”
“Looking to buy a house in my neighborhood, are ya?” I joke.
Brooke gets up from the bed and walks towards the door, “You just never know. Good night, Boo, I love you.”
I laugh, “I love you, too, forever and always.”
The next morning after breakfast, we load up the wagon and walk through the neighborhood pulling James. I am surprised to see the homes that are up for sale. There are five open houses in our subdivision and we walk through all of them. I tag behind Brooke and watch her as she talks about prices, property lines, taxes, and warrantees.
“You act like you are really shopping for a house,” I say, not taking my eyes off hers.
“Well, you just never know when the right house will show up.”
We walk by the beach, pulling the wagon with James in it. After we stop and have ice cream, we walk the short distance home. I am surprised to see my neighbor hammering a for sale sign in his yard that reads, ‘For Sale by Owner.’
“Your neighbors are moving?” Brooke asks.
“It looks like it. I don’t know them since we just moved in last week.”
“I wonder if they’ll care if I look inside.”
“Only one way to find out.”
Brooke steps up her pace, leaving James and me behind her. I watch as she smiles and talks to the elderly man. When James and I get up to her, she is walking towards the front porch as she talks away. James and I walk in with her and Brooke smiles immediately. She asks all kinds of questions as she walks room to room.
“Momma, I’m thirsty.”
“Ok, James.”
“Brooke, we’ll meet you at home. James is thirsty.”
“Ok, I’ll be right there.”
The next few days we spend visiting Max’s mom and dad and my parents. Brooke knew them from Fort Drum, New York. While James is at school, Brooke and I have lunch outside at Marina Jacks. We watch the boats and even a few dolphins feeding near shore. Once we leave, Brooke points out the kissing statue down by the road. “Is that the statue that Max was talking about seeing if she is wearing panties?”
I laugh, “It sure is.”
“Do you have your camera?” Brooke asks, walking over to the larger-than-life-size couple kissing. The statue is very well known. It’s called Unconditional Surrender. It is a US sailor kissing a nurse in New York’s Times Square because the USA was in jubilation over then-President Harry S. Truman’s announcement of the end of the war on Japan. It was a spontaneous kiss between a Navy sailor and a nurse.
“I have my phone,” I say, following her down the sidewalk. As we approach the statue, I can’t help but smile. “I am really going to look up her dress to see if she is wearing panties.”
“You’re not the only one, look at all those people. They’re looking up her dress, too,” Brooke says, as she continues to smile.
Once we get closer to the statue, Brooke pulls out her phone from her purse. “I have to get a picture of my freaky friend taking a picture of some statue’s panties,” she says, laughing.
I laugh, too. “Shut up.”
I walk up to the statue and finally look up. I am relieved to see that you can’t see up her dress. I smile and take a few pictures before walking over to Brooke.
“Well?” she asks.
“What?” I reply.
“Is she or isn’t she wearing any panties?”
“If you want to know, you’ll have to go look.” I smile.
“Fine, but unlike you, I won’t be snapping any pictures of her privates,” she says as she walks towards the base of the statue. She looks up the dress of the statue as she gets closer to it, then she looks back at me and smiles.
“Can you believe Max has us looking up this statue’s dress?” she says with her face red from embarrassment.
“I can, and he is probably cracking up at us. Even in heaven, he makes me laugh.”
Over the next few days, we take a picnic lunch to Myakka Park and watch the alligators in the water. James is excited since this is the first time he actually gets to watch them. We usually just see them as we are out driving, but today, we are taking the time to enjoy them in their own habitat while keeping a safe distance away from them.
“I can’t believe you go home tomorrow.”
“Me, either, this week has flown by.”
“Promise me you’ll come back and bring Brice and the boys.”
Brooke smiles, “I promise, but you may not be thrilled about that once we are here.”
“I doubt that; besides, I have missed them.”
“We’ll definitely be back. The boys would love it here.”
Once Brooke leaves to return home and James is at school, I begin my search for a job. The house is paid for, but I still have bills. I do some online searching and put my résumé in at some places that interest me. James and I sort through the letters from Max, and I cry when I read them. Max’s death will be always be hard on us, but together we are making it.
James takes his letters and places them neatly in his top drawer with the other letters from Max.
A few weeks later I interview and am offered the job at R.K. Insurance on the spot. I interviewed with the two owners, Brea and Sara, and the girl I am replacing also sits in. They are very sweet, and I am looking forward to this new chapter in my life.
I call my parents and Max’s parents and invite them to dinner. This is a reason to celebrate.
“So what’s the special occasion?” my dad asks as he takes a drink of his beer.
“I got a job today, plus James and I became home owners last month. Life is good,” I say, smiling and looking around the round table at everyone.
“Congratulations,” Danny says, raising his beer for a toast. I raise my wineglass and James also raises his plastic cup with the red straw in it. I look around the table at all the smiling faces. “To living the American dream.”
We all clink our glasses and take a drink.
“Where will you be working, Emma?” Cheryl asks.
“Over on Stickney Point at R.K. Insurance. I’ll start Monday as soon as I take James to school. They know I have a son and they are willing to work around my schedule.”
“Is that owned by Sara Roberts?” my dad asks.
“She’s actually one of the owners. She co-owns it with her friend, Brea Kinsley. I don’t think they are from around here, though.”
“I think you’re right, they moved down here a few years ago. Sara dates Donovan Martin, the corporate attorney. He’s one heck of a nice guy. My company has used him in the past; he is one heck of an attorney,” Danny adds. Danny and Cheryl are the owners of D&C Floor and Tile.
I reach into my purse and hand James some crayons and a small tablet to color on. “They were very nice; I think I’ll like working for them.”
“If you ever need any help with James or need someone to pick him up from school, just let us know,” Cheryl says.
“I will, thank you.”
After dinner I have to argue with everyone to pay the bill. I invited them out to celebrate and I want to pick up the check. Dad and Danny both are hard to argue with, but today, they understand this is something I want to do. I know it’s hard for them to let me pay for dinner and I am proud of them for letting me.
Bright and early Monday morning, I kiss James and drop him off at school. I park in back of the insurance company in the designated area and cautiously walk into work. It’s my first day and I am a bit nervous. I hear laughter and look around and see Sara, Brea, and Angel standing at the coffee maker.
“Good morning,” I say, smiling.
“Good morning, Emma,” they say in unison.
The day goes by as though I am among friends. I share a desk with Angel, who is leaving and her last day is Friday. I learn the proper way to answer the phones and where to find resources for answers. I have gone to school for insurance, so I already know the Florida laws about various kinds of insurance and Florida requirements.
I leave on time to pick up James from school.
“How was your day at work, momma?”
“My day was great; how was your day?”
“Good, I find another rock today.”
“You found another rock today?” I say clearly so he knows the proper word is “found.”
“Yep, and it’s a good-luck rock.”
James and I take a walk from our house to the beach and have dinner at a local pizza place on Siesta Key. We walk home before it gets dark and as we get closer to our house, I see our neighbor is removing his ‘For Sale by Owner’ sign from his yard. I wave to him and smile. I haven’t lived here long, and I have spoken to him only a few times.
“James, it looks like we’ll be getting new neighbors soon.”
“Momma, will they have kids?”
“James, I don’t know.”
“I hope they have little kids I can play with.”
“Me, too, James. We’ll have to wait and see.”
After I bathe James and put him to bed, I then soak in a hot bubble bath. My mind reflects on my day: my job, James finding a lucky rock, our walk, and new neighbors. It would be nice to have small kids living next door for James to play with.
Before going to bed, I text Brooke.
Emma: Are you up?
Brooke: Yup, fighting with the hubby.
Emma: Who won?
Brooke: Me, of course.
Emma: Be nice, he worked hard today.
Brooke: I know, story of my life. What’s up?
Emma: No need to pack, your house just sold.
Brooke: What? The house next to you?
Emma: Yep, that’s the one.
Brooke: Just my luck. Let me know when the other neighbor’s house goes up for sale.
Emma: Will do. Sorry.
Brooke: That’s ok, Brice wasn’t ready to move to Florida yet anyway. Good night, Boo, I love you.”
I laugh; this will never get old.
Emma: I love you, always and forever.
The next few months go by quickly. James and I are all settled into our quaint little home. I have adjusted to working again and love my job. Our neighbors have moved out, but their house remains empty. I talk to Brooke once a week and learned that Brice is opening a franchise of his dad’s business: Jamison Heating and Cooling. His father is excited that his business will be carried on by his son and that he can finally retire and his business will grow. The oldest employee will take over the business in their state of Oklahoma, and Brice will — or is considering — moving to another state and expanding the franchise there. Brea, Sara, and Angel have included me in their clique and I am falling into an easy routine with them. Angel has been filling in some since Brea is in her final month of pregnancy. I like them and I am excited to have friends in the area again. Tonight Angel invited me to meet Sara and her at Gecko’s for dinner and drinks. Mom and dad are taking James to see the movie Toy Story, and then he is staying the night with them.
I sit in the parking lot of Gecko’s and decide if I want to go in. I decided to dress down in a pair of jeans, a tee shirt, and sandals. Sara and Angel will be here with their boyfriends, and I’ll be alone. I check myself in the mirror, add a little more lip gloss, and take a deep breath before stepping out of my car.
Walking into the already crowded restaurant, I spot Angel and a very good-looking man first. They are sitting at a round highball table in the lounge. Angel stands and walks over to me with a hug and a genuine smile. We walk up to the table and her boyfriend, Mason, also greets me warmly. I order a glass of wine and Mason orders them another round.
We talk and laugh and Mason keeps a protective arm around Angel. Angel includes him when she can and he smiles and nods. They are a very attractive couple. Mason sees someone he knows entering the restaurant, and he stands to greet him
. I am introduced to Alec along with Angel. I am relieved that Angel doesn’t know him either, otherwise I would feel like this is a blind date. I look at Alec a few times and he smiles. He is a tall, very attractive dark-haired man with an athletic physique.
“Alec, why don’t you join us for dinner?” Angel asks.
“I came in for only a drink, but dinner sounds great. Are you sure I’m not interrupting?”
Angel says with a smile, “We would love for you to stay.” Mason sits across from Angel, and Alec sits across from me. Sara and Donovan arrive — they are both giddy.
“Sorry we’re late. Sara started drinking at home and didn’t want to leave the house.” We all laugh and Mason orders another round of drinks. We order dinner and Mason orders four or five different appetizers. We eat and drink, and I have a really nice time. I look over at Alec a few times and he always seems to catch me. I do believe he is the first man I have found attractive since Max. He is tall and muscular with dark hair and blue eyes. I must always go for the dark-hair-and-piercing-blue-eyes look.
After dinner we say our goodbyes and I thank Angel and Mason for picking up the check. I make sure I am the first to pull out of the parking lot. I don’t like feeling awkward and with Alec there, I’m certain I would.
I go home alone since James is having a sleepover at his grandparents’ house. I light some candles, turn some country music by Alan Jackson on low, and relax in a hot bubble bath.
The next morning I pick up James from his grandparents’ house, have lunch with everyone, and then James and I spend a few hours at the beach building sandcastles. “Momma, Brooke makes the best sandcastles ever.”
“Yes, she sure does.”
“Will she come back and make another one with me?”
“I hope so, I miss her. Do you want to look for seashells?”
“And sea rocks?” James asks, excitedly.
“And sea rocks.” I ruffle his blond hair.
We walk the beach and place seashells and sea rocks into James’ sand bucket. I watch a runner on the beach before I realize it’s Alec. He waves and smiles and I do the same. I get butterflies low in my belly. Why am I getting butterflies? “Come on, James, let’s go home.”
Shattered Dreams Page 9
