In a daze, Laurie agreed. The rest of their coffee went by in a sort of daze, and he remained that way even when he was back home. Ed noticed and asked Laurie what was wrong. And so Laurie told him what his mother had asked and that he had agreed.
Ed's eyebrows shot up into his hairline. “Holy shit! I mean, that's cool as hell, but Laur, it's in three days!”
“We can do it,” Laurie said, convincing himself as much as Ed. Then he glanced at him. “Unless—”
Ed held up a hand. “No. I'm good. I'm totally good, I swear. This Feldenkrais treatment Tim has me on is weird, but I think it works.” But even as he said this, there was worry in his eye.
“We can always back out if something goes wrong,” Laurie suggested.
Ed kissed his cheek. “Okay.”
They rehearsed that night in the apartment as much as they could, and they spent much of the next day revisiting the routine in full. Laurie made a few adjustments just in case, keeping the impact on Ed as low as possible.
But on Friday night, once Ed had gone to bed, Laurie lay awake, staring at the ceiling. He was excited to perform with Ed. He really was. But something was nagging at him, like there was something more he should do. He went over the routine in his head, trying to see if there was something he was missing, but he couldn't think of anything.
He drifted into sleep, and he dreamed. He dreamed of the routine, rehearsing in his mind. It took on the surreal oddness all dreams did. He and Ed danced on rooftops, on ceilings, across Lake Minnetonka, across the fields beside his parents’ estate. And then as the dream came to a close, Ed faded away, and he danced alone, across the sky, up into the stars, out across the whole universe, dancing until his soul flew free, dancing with a fervor that could take him on until the end of time. Dancing with joy. Dancing with his heart.
Dancing alone.
Dancing.
He woke alone too, in the center of the bed, drenched in sweat, staring at the ceiling. In the other room Ed was banging in the kitchen and humming softly along to the Black Eyed Peas. But part of Laurie was still flying, still lingering in the dream, and in that moment, alone in the bed with Ed humming in the distance, he knew, finally, what he was missing.
Laurie smiled—and laughed.
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* * *
Chapter Twenty
resolucion (resolution): the ending of a set of tango steps. Does not necessarily end the dance.
Ed thought there was something funny about Laurie as they got ready for his mother's benefit.
“You okay?” he asked as they headed over to the center for one more rehearsal.
“Never better,” Laurie said, and Ed believed him.
But there was something funny about him. For one, he'd disappeared for three hours that morning. And he seemed out of breath when he returned.
“You're up to something,” Ed accused.
Laurie laughed. “Yes.” Then he kissed Ed on the cheek. “Wait and see.”
For the center recital they'd had simple costumes; for the gala, Laurie had given them both an upgrade, though to Ed's delight Laurie was still wearing tights. Something about how he needed freedom of moment. Ed really didn't give a damn, just as long as there were tights. But instead of just the simple white T-shirts they'd picked out before, they were wearing these fancy tops with glitter and sequins in a sassy little dash across the front in colors that complemented one another. They also, because Laurie said so, had glitter streaks across their faces. Ed had thought it would look like war paint, and it kind of did, but it was something else too. It felt kind of magic, and Ed was excited.
He was really glad his neck had decided to cooperate too.
When they got to the venue—a very fancy hotel ballroom with a massive stage constructed at one end—Ed started to get nervous. Could he really do this? In front of all these people? He watched from the wings of the stage as they ate their dinner, waiting for Caroline to come back and tell them it was their turn.
Laurie came up behind him and wrapped his arms around his waist before kissing his neck. “You'll be fine,” he said.
Ed nodded, but he still was nervous. “It's just... That's a lot of people.”
“Two thousand,” Laurie said, not sounding concerned.
Ed turned to him. “You're not nervous at all? You're okay with this?” He admitted to himself he was half hoping Laurie would say no and they could run off into the night before Caroline caught them.
Laurie smiled. “Not at all.” He nodded across the stage. “Ah. Here comes my mother.”
Ed steadied himself. Okay. He could do this. Caroline would introduce them, and then they would go out and take their position, and then the music would start...
Oh God.
Caroline finished introducing them, the room burst into applause, and Ed clutched Laurie's hand, then let go, ready to go onto the stage. But then Laurie was standing in front of him, blocking his path and smiling.
“We'll dance together in a minute,” he said. “But first I'm going to dance on my own.”
Ed blinked at him. “What? What do you mean? We—” Laurie's words sank in, and his jaw fell briefly open. “On your own? Like, a dance?”
Laurie's smile turned into a grin. “Yes.”
“There are two thousand people out there!”
Laurie laughed. “I've danced for ten thousand. Though that was actually easy, because they couldn't see me very well, I was so far away.” He squeezed Ed's hand. “I want to do this. I need to do this.”
“For your mom?” Laurie shook his head. Ed glared. “Not for me, damn it. I never asked you to do this. Later, eventually, but not like this—”
“For me,” Laurie said. “I need to do this for me.” He kissed Ed on the cheek. “Wait here. Though actually, if you want to go out front and watch, I'd like that very much.”
He stripped out of his shirt, revealing more glitter stripes across his bare chest, and then he strode out onto the stage.
Ed stayed in the wings for a few minutes, still stunned, watching as Laurie took the mic from his mother and explained the switch in programming. The crowd burst into applause, and most of them got to their feet. Laurie shooed his mother away and struck a pose in the center of the stage as the lights went down. He'd already arranged this, Ed realized and hurried out around to the front so he could watch.
The music started. The lights came up again.
Laurie danced.
Ed didn't know the song, but it was no Barbra Streisand. It was some kind of pop music, loud and hard and rich, full of swells and synthesizers. But the music didn't matter. It was just there to fill the air as Laurie danced.
And how he danced. He leaped across the stage. He spun. He danced, in fact, as Ed had never seen him dance before. He saw hints of all the dances he'd ever seen Laurie do—ballet, jazz, and some moves from the tango. He saw the moves he'd taught the kids at the studio. He saw the moves Laurie had done in the dance he'd done for Ed at Christmas. He didn't know most of the names of the moves, but it didn't matter. They were all part of the dance now. And they were beautiful.
Laurie was beautiful. He was lithe and graceful and strong, so strong. His muscles rippled across his naked back and in his tight-clad legs as he moved through the dance as if it were nothing to him, as if his body had been made to move like this. And maybe it had. Even without the glitter, there was something magic about watching Laurie dance—the same magic Ed had felt when he danced with him, but to watch him, to see him perform...
It was more than just seeing into Laurie's soul. It was as if, by watching Laurie dance, he could see into all souls. Into the power of the body. Into the aching beauty and thrill of movement. Into the grace and wonder of the human form. When he watched Laurie dance, he believed. In everything.
When the dance ended, the crowd roared. They rose to their feet as one body, and they shouted and cheered and clapped so loud the din hurt Ed's ears. Ed became aware of movement beside him and saw Car
oline standing there, cool and composed as ever, but tears were streaming down her face.
In the center of the stage, Laurie stood tall and proud, and then he bowed.
“Go to him,” Caroline whispered and pushed Ed forward. He went. He didn't go backstage, just took the stairs on the side and went forward to the middle, to where Laurie had turned to greet him, beaming like the sun.
The crowd sat down, and the lights lowered again, shifting to the soft tones they'd agreed on for their dance.
“Ready?” Laurie asked, still smiling as he put his shirt back on.
The opening strains of a tango began, and Ed smiled back as he took Laurie into his embrace. “Ready,” he said.
And they danced.
ON THIS DAY
the eleventh of October
in the year twenty eleven
in the beautiful city of
Des Moines, Iowa
at four o'clock in the afternoon
at the First Unitarian Church
Laurence Albert Parker
son of Albert and Caroline Parker
and
Edward Howard Maurer
son of Annette and Richard Maurer
were joined forever in marriage.
May their future be filled with happiness,
and may they never forget that above all
they should enjoy the dance
and always dance together.
THE END
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* * *
Loose Id Titles by Heidi Cullinan
Dance with Me
Nowhere Ranch
THE ETSEY SERIES
The Seventh Veil
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* * *
Heidi Cullinan
Heidi grew up in love with story. She fell asleep listening to Disney long-playing records and read her Little House On The Prairie books until they fell apart. She invented stories of witches and fairies and enchanted trees and spent hours imagining the lives of the settlers who had inhabited the homestead log cabin and two-story late 1800s home on her family farm. She created epic storylines for her Barbies until age ten and then started writing them down. Her first novel, The Life and Times of Michelle Matthews, was published when she was twelve in the school anthology and took up nearly half of it.
Though Heidi continued to write novels through high school, she stopped in college, deciding it was time to grow up and do something meaningful with her life. When Heidi ended up in grad school to become a teacher, she rediscovered her love of romance novels. She began to write again on the side, and when she quit teaching to have her daughter, she took up writing with more seriousness.
Eight years and many million pages later, Heidi has learned a lot about writing, more than she ever wanted to know about publishing, and most importantly, finally figured out that writing IS the meaningful something she wants to do with her life. She has been a member of many writing organizations including Romance Writers of America and moderates on Jennifer Crusie's online reader and writer forum.
A passionate advocate for LGBT rights, Heidi volunteers as often as she can for One Iowa and donates with her husband as a monthly partner to the Human Rights Campaign and Lambda Legal.
Heidi is an active social networker and can be found here:
Main Web site: www.heidicullinan.com
Twitter: twitter.com/amazoniowan
Facebook: www.facebook.com/heidi.cullinan
Tumblr: amazoniowan.tumblr.com/
LiveJournal: heidicullinan.livejournal.com/
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Visit www.loose-id.com for information on additional titles by this and other authors.
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