Gage allowed his fingers to play against hers. “My mom says the same thing.”
Her eyes exploded in size.
He blushed. “I mean, she doesn’t say that she gets turned on looking at my hands.” His blush grew into a soft laugh. “She’s just always said I have beautiful hands.”
“You do.”
“She’d like you.”
Veda couldn’t help laughing again. “I’m sure she’s drafting my wedding invite right now.”
“She knows I don’t love Scarlett. The same way she doesn’t love my father. When I approached you at the bar, the night we met? She said she saw it in my eyes. How badly I wanted you.”
“So you finally admit that you were flirting with me?”
“You can’t begin to imagine the X-rated things I did to you in my head when I saw that sucker between your lips for the first time.”
“I knew it.” Veda sighed, letting his hand fall back to her breast, covering it. She was relieved when he squeezed and rolled her nipples between his fingers, hoping it would be enough to keep him distracted.
It wasn’t. Even as he copped a feel, words still spilled from his mouth that made her stomach ache. “The day we got trapped in the elevator… You said you went to a dark place the night Todd grabbed you—”
“I say lots of crazy things.”
He went on as if he hadn’t heard her. “I feel like my mother goes to that place all the time. Especially when she’s around my father. She never smiles genuinely. Never shows outward anger. The only time I ever see real emotion on her face is when she’s looking at me. And sometimes, I can see it when she looks at my father—when she can’t fight the slightest, tiniest waver to the smile that stays cemented on her face.”
Veda wanted to ask him why he was telling her this, but she knew it would be a waste of breath.
She already knew the answer.
“I know you and her would… understand each other.” His eyes searched hers. “Because I don’t know how to get her out of that place. Just like I don’t know how to get you out of that place.”
Veda’s eyes fluttered closed. She felt both his hands leave her breasts and cup her cheeks.
“How do I get you out, Veda?”
Her eyes opened once more and reclaimed his gaze. She finally allowed him to force her into the corner she didn’t want to be in, hearing it in her voice when she spoke. “I’m not the angel you think I am.” She held her breath for as long as she could stand it. “And you are officially in the friends-with-benefits danger zone. Stop it.”
A gentle smile broke on his face. He let his maddening gaze lie on hers for several long, gut-churning moments before he finally threw her a bone and turned his head away, laying his cheek on her lower belly, still twisting her nipples softly.
“Have you RSVP’d to your hospital gala invite yet?” he asked.
“How many different ways can a girl say that she’d rather be dead than go to that hospital gala?”
He chuckled. “I need you. My family expects me to be there, to keep up appearances, but I doubt I’ll make it through if I can’t look across the room and see your face.”
“You’ve made it twenty-six whole years without me, Gage.”
“I honestly don’t know how. I have no idea how I made it this long without yo—”
She shushed him. “Danger zone.”
He lifted his head, and his puppy eyes melted her.
“You can have me here, at my apartment, where you’ve always had me, once the gala is over. We’ll fuck until the sun comes up, okay?”
“Most of the hospital staff will be in attendance. Nurses, administration, even the doctors will be there. Coco too.”
“All the more reason not to go.”
“She adores you. Why do you insist on pushing her away?”
“I’m not the angel she thinks I am either.”
He kissed her belly button and rested his chin inside it, leaving her breasts so he could take her hands, intertwining their fingers.
And he said it. “I don’t want to marry Scarle—”
Veda moved her hand from his in a flash, slapping her pointer finger against his mouth. “Danger.”
He smiled against her finger, still smooshed on his lips, and then he puckered them, kissing the tip.
Veda’s heart plummeted to her feet.
—
If only he knew.
If only Gage knew Veda spent every waking moment alone trailing Todd Lockwood with the intent of ending his life. Spying on him at the gym. In a parked car outside his home. During his lunches at Blackwater Cruises.
If only Gage knew the real reason she’d come back to Shadow Rock, he wouldn’t be in such a hurry to disrespect their danger zone.
And disrespect it he had, time and time again. More bold and brazen with each passing day. Veda already knew their torrid affair was nearing its fiery end anyway. She now understood that Gage would never stop pushing her for something she couldn’t give.
Wouldn’t give.
Something she didn’t have to give.
The part of her capable of loving, and being loved, had died ten years ago. It was a part of her that was never coming back.
Not ever.
It was part of her that had died with Todd Lockwood.
She knew Gage would never understand.
She knew she’d have to end it.
Thankfully, Todd appeared, stepping out of the front door of his home just as Veda found herself feeling nauseous at the thought. Not at the thought of ending things with Gage, but of his reaction. She imagined he’d be hurt, and that was the last thing she wanted.
She tightened her grip on the bronze chip in her hand when her stomach grew sicker by the second. Better to hurt Gage now, when it would only sting a little, than further down the line when he’d gotten attached. When they’d both gotten attached.
She sucked in a breath and tried to control the storm swirling under her skin, watching as Todd climbed into his Aston Martin and tore out of his driveway.
Veda started her car too, her metallic manicure gleaming under the rising sun as she turned the steering wheel and followed him down the road.
—
Tonight, Veda decided.
She would end things with Gage for good tonight.
No better place to do it than at Blackwater Hospital’s annual fundraising gala. Gage wouldn’t cause a scene with his parents, their business associates, and the hospital’s most generous donors in the room. And since they were in public, he wouldn’t have the chance to muddy up her mind with his cock, making her second-guess her decision.
She felt Coco’s arms tighten around hers from where she stood beside Veda. Both wearing green ball gowns, only slightly different in style, they looked like the Bobbsey Twins. By the time they’d realized their mistake, it had been too late for either of them to go home and change.
Coco, of course, didn’t seem to mind.
She squealed softly. “I’m so glad you changed your mind about coming. I love these things. It’ll be even more fun with you here.”
Veda’s eyes rose to the domed ceiling of the largest ballroom in Shadow Rock. Lined with thousands of tiny white lights, it gave the illusion of a starry sky. Sheer white curtains were draped across the ceiling, and the lights gave them an angelic glow.
Her gaze lowered. Hundreds of tuxedos milled around circular white dining tables, making the room look like a black and white blur, with the occasional pop of color thanks to the women in ball gowns.
“I hate these things,” Veda countered, looking at Coco.
Coco frowned, bringing her hand up to tuck a piece of her spiral-curled hair behind her ear. As always, the long sleeves of her gown had been pulled all the way down, covering most of her fingers. It was pulled so tight that the neckline was stretched, showing a hint of her pink bra.
“No, I totally hate these things too,” Coco said, her eyes falling. “I’m just excited to hang with you, that’s all.”
/>
Veda fixed the swooped neckline of Coco’s dress so her bra strap wasn’t showing.
“It’s okay if you love galas,” Veda told her. “It’s okay if you and I don’t always love the same things. Especially since I don’t love anything. We can disagree. It won’t make us any less….” Veda tried to stop herself before she said the word bouncing around in her head, but it slipped out before she could. “It doesn’t make us any less friends. Okay?”
Coco’s eyes blew up to twice their size at that word. Friends. She removed her arm from Veda’s so she could yank her sleeves farther down, showing her bra strap again, as a beautiful smile lit up her face.
“If you love something, express that,” Veda said. “If you hate something, express that too. Don’t ever let anyone make you believe your feelings aren’t valid. They’re valid. You’re valid.”
Coco blushed, her gaze dropping shyly to the floor.
Veda reached out and fixed her neckline again, making Coco’s sleeves ride up. She chuckled when Coco yanked them right back down, giving up.
“Aren’t you hot?” Veda asked. “You look stunning, but you’re always in long sleeves. It’s damn near a hundred degrees outside.”
Coco shrugged a shoulder. “My arms are ugly.”
“Lies, lies, and more lies. There are dancers at the New York City Ballet who would kill for those Swan Lake arms.”
Coco blushed again.
Veda nudged her shoulder, relinking their arms. “But, hey… it’s your body. If you want to cover up and be hot, go nuts. Who am I to tell you what to do, right?” She returned her eyes to the ballroom.
When she caught sight of Gage, standing across the room with Scarlett’s arm linked in his, smiling at two well-dressed men, Veda’s blood ran cold.
She was stunned at her body’s instant response, unable to pinpoint exactly what it was.
Distantly, past the blood pounding in her ears, making it hard to hear, she heard Coco whisper, “I’m really glad we’re friends, Veda.”
But Veda couldn’t respond because, across the room, Gage had caught sight of her as well. And it appeared he’d stopped listening to the people before him just as quickly as Veda had stopped listening to Coco.
He smiled at her, and when her body was hit with an urge to cross that room and do unthinkable things to his dick, Veda knew she was making the right decision.
Not for another moment could she allow him to take the reins of her mind and her body like he was right then.
Not for another moment could she deem her mind, her body, and her pussy—which already pounded for a taste of him—unrecognizable under his suggestive, emotive eyes.
She hadn’t come back to Shadow Rock to be distracted by that spit-shined rich boy, and this would be the night she ended things for good.
Before he destroyed it all.
—
Veda made it halfway through the main course before she couldn’t take it anymore. She was ready to go. Not because of the people at her table—she’d lucked out by being seated with her fellow anesthesiologist residents and some of her favorite nurses. Even the doctors who’d somehow been stuck sitting at their table were completely bearable. None of them seemed to suffer from the God complex most surgeons had, like the ones she had to tolerate every day at work. She wasn’t even ready to leave because of Coco, who hadn’t stopped giving her doe eyes since she’d made the colossal mistake of letting the word ‘friend’ slip from her lips earlier that night.
It was because, across the room at Table 1, she saw that Gage was barely listening to his mother, who was never not whispering in his ear. He cringed across the table at Todd, who he still wasn’t speaking to, as if it was taking every ounce of his will not to leap across that table, overturning the crystal centerpiece, and aim the steak knife in his hand at Todd’s throat. She saw the impatience staining his eyes whenever his father said anything. She saw the way he never looked Scarlett in the eye…
Because he was too busy looking across the room at her.
Veda only made it halfway through the main course because she could finally see that her casual relationship with Gage wasn’t just going to destroy her plans. Her life. Her future.
It was going to destroy his too. She couldn’t let him throw both their lives away for something she knew wasn’t going anywhere.
Still, the thought of ending it all didn’t sit as easily as it had when she’d arrived. And as each second, each minute, each hour passed with Gage ignoring his family completely to smile across the room at her, it made her feel more sick.
She put down her napkin and excused herself, needing a break. A break from the tedium of social interaction, a break from Coco’s gooey, BFF-laden eyes… and a break from Gage’s heated ones.
At first, she navigated her way through the dozens of tables in the ballroom with grace. She smiled when she caught a familiar eye here and there. But soon the thoughts in her head took over and she picked up her stride, stopping only long enough to brush the shoulders of people she knew.
When she made it out into the long, empty hallway, gold chandeliers lining the ceiling, it got a little easier.
Breathing.
She sucked in the new air, letting her eyes flutter shut as she followed the overhead signs to the bathroom, which led her around a corner and into a different hallway that seemed to go on forever.
Kind of like the war inside her. Her body felt at complete odds. She was sure that, if one of the asshole surgeons in the ballroom cut her open right there, they’d discover her organs had all turned on each other, firing shots with the intent to kill, unaware that killing one meant killing all.
She’d do anything to make it stop, whatever was happening to her.
She hadn’t even noticed she’d stopped in the middle of the hallway, cradling her hand on the wall, until someone took her arm from behind.
She gasped and looked over her shoulder.
One look into his brown eyes, gleaming down at her from behind, and the war in her stomach eased. The organs that had just a moment earlier been thirsty for blood lay their armor down.
“Gage,” she whispered, searching his eyes and spitting out the words she’d been practicing all night, before she could change her mind. “I need to talk to you.”
He tightened his fingers around her arm. “I….” A lump moved down his throat. “I need to talk to you too.”
“Me first.” She removed her arm from his grasp and took his hand, guiding him to the ladies’ restroom across the hall.
Her heels clicked on the tile floor as she stepped into the spacious bathroom.
His dress shoes did as well.
The stalls along the far wall were empty. A baby changing table hung open next to the sink, and the perfume sprayer bolted to the wall above it hummed as it dispensed another whiff of a pleasant lavender fragrance.
Veda walked into the middle of the bathroom, only turning to Gage when she heard the door click shut behind him.
Her words caught in her throat. He looked so handsome, gazing at her from the door with his hair slicked back, showcasing his breathtaking face in a way she’d never seen before. His tuxedo fit like a dream.
She noticed how he lingered at the door, even though it was closed, keeping his fingers on the handle as if he could sense the words about to leave her mouth and was steeling himself for escape.
But she wouldn’t let him escape. She wrung her hands together when he crossed the bathroom, coming in close enough for her to breathe in his spicy scent. When her pussy instantly surged with moisture in the presence of his aroma, she forced the words from her mouth.
“Gage, I really think that this thing between you and I—”
He covered her lips with his pointer and middle finger, stopping her before she could say another word. His lips puckered to shush her, but no sound came out. His fingers remained on her lips until he was sure she wouldn’t finish what she was saying—as if he already knew what she’d been planning to say—before lett
ing his hand fall gently back to his side. He buried both hands in his pockets and watched her for a while.
A second lump moved down his throat, and the silence stayed so long it felt like a life all its own.
Finally, his whispered voice invaded the quiet air. “I kept waiting for what I knew I was supposed to feel when I looked at her for the first time.”
Veda felt her eyes padlocking themselves to his, falling into the emotion on his face. The strength in his voice. She could hear in his tone that this was difficult for him to say, but his voice didn’t quiver. His eyes didn’t leave hers. Never had she seen his body so sure of the words leaving his mouth. His eyes so sure of his heart.
She opened her mouth to say his name, to say anything to stop this.
Stop him.
She couldn’t.
He paused, and when his voice came again, it had dropped deeper. “I kept waiting to feel… the euphoria. The butterflies. The rush. Caring about a woman so much that… that the world could be on fire all around us, and I wouldn’t even notice it… or even feel it burning.”
Stop him. Her mind screamed orders like a king whose realm was under attack. Seize him.
She tried, but when she said his name, “Gage…,” she barely heard her own whispered voice.
He stepped closer. “For a long time, I wondered if I was even capable of it.” His aura encased her. “Until the first night we made love. Then it just hit me. With you, it wasn’t euphoria. It was… nirvana. It wasn’t butterflies. It was vultures.”
Her eyes expanded. She held her breath.
A smile threatened his previously drawn face, lighting it up as he made a claw at his stomach. “Vultures… clawing my stomach to pieces.” He drew in a haggard breath, cupping her jaw with one hand.
Veda inhaled sharply.
Don’t let him touch you! The petrified, ill-fated king in her head continued spitting orders her heart couldn’t follow. Step back now!
Quiver (Revenge Book 1) Page 14