So how could she let him down gently?
“I can have fun without drinking, Danny. Don’t worry about me.” Ashley smiled, a forced smile, one only someone who knew her well could see.
Danny didn’t know her that well. Which didn’t mean he was giving up. “I’m just worried you’ll let your dead boyfriend rule your life. He was a stupid drunk. So what? That doesn’t mean everyone who drinks is.”
“Bobby wasn’t a drunk. He just got drunk and was stupid enough to drive.” Ashley crossed her arms over her belly and leaned back. “Why are you bringing him up?”
Danny ignored her question. “No, but your stepdad’s definitely a drunk.”
Ashley stood. “I shouldn’t have come.”
Something slammed down on the bar beside her. Ashley met Danny’s eyes as he filled the shot glass to the rim. He pushed the glass towards her. “You’re not like him, Ashley.”
The glass looked so much bigger than it should. The dark, amber liquid, gleamed like a jewel, some of it resting in a still pool around the bottom of the glass. It was one glass. One small glass.
A mountain would have been easier to face.
Ashley’s mouth had gone dry. “I promised I wouldn’t.”
Danny walked around the bar until he was facing her, his socked feet on the cement making little more than a muffled sound. With the boys around the bar and the fluorescent lights overhead, the fact that he was walking around in socks made the whole thing seem surreal. They weren’t in a real bar. It was just a basement.
Which would have made a difference if the accident hadn’t happened after a house party.
Danny snapped his fingers in front of Ashley’s face. Ashley blinked and gazed up at him. “Sorry. What?”
“Who did you promise?” Danny was the picture of patience. It was obvious he thought he had a point to make.
Not sure what it was Ashley simply told him the truth. “Myself.”
Leaning over, Danny picked up the shot glass and held it up between them. Then he patted her shoulder. “All right, that’s it then. I was just worried that you were letting someone else make your decisions for you. Glad to know you aren’t. Forget drinking…leave it to us little people who don’t know any better.”
Glass tilted against his lips, Danny opened his mouth to take the shot. Ashley blocked his arm, spilling the alcohol over both of them. Giggling nervously, she grabbed a handful of napkins, dabbed at the wet spot on his shirt. She swallowed when he caught her hand and held it against his chest.
“I don’t think I’m better than you, Danny.” Ashley tipped her head back. It was hard to believe Danny was only a year older than her. He was so much bigger. Seemed like big guys ran in Steph’s family.
“I never said that you did.” He grinned and bent down, resting his forehead against hers. “Are you scared of what would happen if you drank with me, Ashley? You know I won’t let you drive, right?”
“But…”
Danny pressed his fingers to her lips. “You came here because you were upset. You needed to forget about everything and you know I can help you do that.” His voice turned to a whisper. “You know that right? You trust me, don’t you?”
“One drink?” The question was silly. Ashley asked it anyway. It would make her feel so much better to focus on one.
“Start with one.” Danny smiled, his advice right along her own thoughts. “Have one drink with me, we’ll chill for a bit, listen to some music, and we’ll see where it goes from there.”
Another drink was poured. Danny and Ashley clinked their glasses together in cheers. Eyes closed Ashley downed the shot.
The next few shots went down easy. With Danny at her side, making the whole thing seem of little consequence, Ashley was able to enjoy herself. This was the kind of oblivion she’d missed. She was able to dance, to laugh, and to play, all while forgetting she’d ever had a care in the world.
And why shouldn’t she? Joseph and her mom did their own things. Colin and Steph had each other. Ashley wanted something of her own, and she would start with claiming her own life.
After a while Ashley got tired of playing around and just wanted to rest. Her head was spinning and the harsh liquor was sitting uncomfortably in her stomach. Noticing this, Danny and one of his friends brought her to Danny’s room and suggested she lie down for a bit.
Grateful for the offer, Ashley reclined on the bed, smiling at Danny when he lowered the light. She expected him and his friend to leave, but instead the other boy simply shut the door while Danny took a seat at the edge of the bed.
“You okay?” Danny reached out and smoothed back her hair.
Ashley nodded. “I guess I lost my high tolerance for alcohol.” The thought made her giggle. “I won’t be driving anywhere tonight.”
“Stay here tonight. I don’t mind.” Danny shifted over and rested down at her side. Setting his hand on her waist he began running his fingers softly over her stomach.
The gentle touch was nice, so Ashley didn’t protest. When his friend, whose name she just couldn’t remember, stretched out on her other side, it was a little harder to relax. “Danny…”
Danny pulled her closer and kissed her cheek, then moved his lips to cover hers, whispering. “Just relax Ashley. It’ll be fine. Me and Pete will take care of you. Right, Pete?”
“Danny, we can’t.” Ashley tried to move back, but it only put her closer to Peter. “You’re Steph’s cousin and we’re family and—”
Peter untied her halter top, slid his arms around her, and helped Danny ease up her shirt. Danny smiled at her when her eyes opened wide and she tried too late to pull her shirt back down. Her efforts only served to make it easier for him to take it.
“You weren’t worried about me being family when you dressed like this were you?” His hand covered her breast, only covered by her bra, and he tried to kiss her again. “It’s okay, I understand. We don’t have to tell anyone…”
Ashley pushed at his hand, clenching her thighs when a hand moved between them. Her little skirt wasn’t much of a barrier and soon she felt fingers, gliding over her panties, pushing them aside and slipping inside her.
The feeling sobered her at once. Shoving Danny, she struggled to get away from the probing fingers. Danny grabbed her hands and held them against her chest.
“Doesn’t seem like she’s having much fun, Danny.” Peter sounded observant. Not that he cared, just that he’d noticed.
“She’ll get into it. Just hold her for a minute.” While Peter wrapped his arms around her Danny undid his pants.
With that Ashley began to fight in earnest. Talking her way out of this wasn’t going to happen. It was too late. She’d been stupid and now she was trapped. All she could do was fight. Fight and scream. Realizing, she hadn’t yet, Ashley opened her mouth.
Danny slammed his big hand over it and laughed, shaking his head. “Unless you want the guest list for our little party to get a bit bigger, I suggest you keep quiet.”
Tears filled Ashley’s eyes. She wanted to beg him to stop. Instead instinct took over and she bit into his hand.
Cursing, Danny tried to shake her lose. When she wouldn’t let go, he backhanded her. Ashley let him go and threw herself off the bed when Danny sat up to look at his bloody palm.
Both boys came after her. Ashley grabbed a lamp and jerked the cord from the wall before heaving it at them. Without waiting to see if it had slowed them down, Ashley lunged for the door and yanked it open.
“Colin!”
The shock at seeing him was nothing compared to her relief. Ashley didn’t protest when Colin pulled her behind him. If he wanted to take it from here, that was fine with her.
Danny had managed to stop well out of harms way. Peter wasn’t so lucky. Before he knew what was happening Colin had swung out his arm and knocked Peter’s head into the doorframe. “I could kill you for this.” Colin stepped forward.
Danny stepped back. “She came here! I thought she wanted…”
As
hley grabbed Colin’s arm before he could go for Danny again. “Let’s just go.”
“Why don’t you go wait in the jeep, Ashley?” Colin tried to shake her off. Ashley held on stubbornly.
“No. Colin you’re a soldier.”
Brow lifted, Colin glanced down at her. “Yes, I know that.”
Ashley’s eyes narrowed. “Don’t be a jerk. You know if you hurt them you’ll be in shit. You won’t be tried as a normal citizen.”
“You watch too many movies.” Colin seemed to have forgotten the boys, both the ones in the room and the ones keeping their heads down near the bar. Grabbing a jacket off the sofa that was pushed against the wall just a few feet away, he draped it over her shoulders. “How ‘bout I get you back to the hotel.” He guided her towards the stairs leading out of the basement, then glanced back over his shoulder with a dangerous smile. “Then I can come back and kill them.”
Grabbing Colin’s hand, Ashley tugged him along with her. “No.” Her voice broke as she struggled to get the words out. “I don’t want my stupidity hurting anyone else.”
* * * *
Ashley’s last vehement statement had Colin dismissing Danny and his friends as irrelevant—for the moment. He could find another way to make them pay. Later. The important thing was making sure she was okay.
This conversation was not one to be had in front of the assholes that had tried to take advantage of her. That in mind, Colin led Ashley out to the jeep, fetched a blanket from the back, and unfolded it before speaking again.
“What exactly did they do?” He took in the sorry state of her clothes, from her rumpled skirt to the absent shirt. Shaking his head he covered her in the serviceable grey blanket, tucking it around her shoulders before doing up her seatbelt. “Besides the obvious that is.”
Ashley freed her arms and reached over to grab a half full bottle of water from the cup holder. Her hands shook as she opened the bottle and poured a little bit into her palm so that she could clean the blood off her face. Scrubbing her palm over her mouth and chin, she glanced in the mirror to see if she’d gotten it all, then used the edge of the blanket to dry off.
Blanket held to her chin, knees drawn to her chest, Ashley turned sideways so she could watch Colin walk around the car and get in the driver’s side. “Not much. I snapped out of my drunken stupor when it all started and managed to get away from them.”
Colin started the car and let it ease out onto the street. “So the blood’s not yours?”
A crease formed in Ashley’s brow as she touched her mouth. Hiding a wince, she nodded. “I bit Danny when he tried to stop me from screaming.”
“You should get tested. Who knows what that bastard’s got.” Colin drew in a slow breath, fighting for control. “I could bring you to the hospital now. If there’s any evidence…”
Ashley stiffened in her seat. “Evidence of what? I told you nothing happened.”
“But they tried.”
Head bowed Ashley gave a little nod. “Yeah. They tried.”
Much too soon they reached the street that led up to the hotel. Still determined to get her to go to the hospital, to do everything necessary to file charges—since Ashley didn’t want him to commit murder—Colin just kept driving. No destination in mind. Nothing but the endless road and Ashley stuck at his side. They were alone and he could get her to talk.
Not something he was looking forward to, Steph was much better at the whole inner emotional crap, but it was something he had to do. That Ashley had to do. There was no way around it. Not unless he trusted someone else to take care of her.
“Why did you go there?” Keeping his eyes on the road, Colin fought to sound neutral. Concerned, but not accusing.
Shifting in her seat, Ashley stared at her knees and shrugged. “Something to do.”
Swerving the car to the side of the road, Colin slammed his fist on the steering wheel, jammed his foot on the brake and stared at her. “Something to do? Damn it, Ashley, why? What in the world possessed you to do something so reckless? There were five guys there. Do you know how much worse that could have gone?”
So much for keeping his cool to get her talking.
Being put on the defensive seemed to loosen Ashley’s tongue. “How the hell would I know someone I considered family would pull something like that?” Eyes flashing she leaned closer to him. “I woke up to a lot of changes. I need time to get used to it.”
“Is this about me and Steph?” There, he’d said it. There was no point in pretending she didn’t know. He could be way off track but he doubted it. If Ashley’s reaction to finding out about his relationship with their stepsister was going to have her acting out like this he needed to address the issue now.
The quick swallow and shake of her head didn’t fool him. Colin caught the rim of tears in her eyes just before she lowered her head to her knees, hiding from him.
Colin undid his seatbelt, then leaned over to undo hers. His jeans scuffed against the rough material of his seat as he shifted over, placing his hand on Ashley’s shoulder. When she refused to look at him, still huddled down in her seat in a very childlike pose, Colin reached out and lifted her straight out of her seat.
Ashley looked up, eyes wide, lips parted as he set her in his lap. Colin didn’t look at her. Relaxing back into his seat he left his arms around her, holding her to his chest. Then he waited. When the stiff set of her spine and shoulders finally eased he started stroking her hair, smoothing it down over the blanket still wrapped around her.
“I’m not going to try and justify what I’m doing with Steph.” Colin kept petting Ashley’s hair, his words a calm monotone, well paced so they had time to sink in. “But in no way, shape or form does that change things with me and you. I love you. I never hung out with Steph before the accident. Me and you were a lot closer. Mostly because you followed me around like a puppy.”
Bristling, Ashley frowned up at him, clearly offended. Colin looked down and met her eyes, the edge of his lip lifting, making it very clear that he didn’t mind. Anymore that is.
“The point is nothing has to change between us.”
Ashley tried to push away from him. “So things just continue as if nothing’s happened. You and Steph have your thing and so long as I stay out of the way everything’s fine.”
Holding Ashley right where she was, Colin waited until she’d stopped fighting him before forcing her to look at him. “How in the world did you get that out of what I just said?”
“Nothing changes between us. Steph’s your girlfriend and I’m just the annoying kid you both gotta deal with.”
“Since when are you annoying?”
Hands braced against his chest, Ashley tried to push herself back. She didn’t get far, so she tried sliding down out of his grasp even as she spoke. “I guess I wasn’t while I was out of the way. Must have been convenient.”
Holding her was like trying to hold as dozen squirming puppies. Not ready to give up, Colin turned and dropped his seat back midway, pushed Ashley down on the seat, and put himself in front of her.
It was an awkward position, one knee on the floor, one bent against the seat between her thighs, hands against her shoulders. Still, the space in the jeep made it possible and put him in control of the situation. The last thing he needed was her trying to take off.
“That’s quite enough.” Colin’s tone was firm, the same one he’d used on her when she was a child. The tone that had once been used only when she was doing something dangerous or obnoxious, but it served him well enough now. Ashley couldn’t help but respond to the command.
Even if it was followed by typical teenage defiance. “You really shouldn’t be holding me like this. People might make something of it.”
Her mockery of him made Colin want to forget getting through to her, bend her over his lap, and spank her. The image made him hard, much harder than he’d been with her writhing around in his lap. Remembering that wasn’t helping him stay on point.
“Do you really think I ca
re what people think?”
“Enough that you’re keeping your relationship with Steph a secret.”
Colin leaned down, closer to her, wanting to make sure she didn’t miss a word. “Sexual preferences between consenting adults are none of anyone else’s business. I don’t need to announce it to the world to know how I feel. Hell, if what was going on with you and Danny and his friend hadn’t been forced, I wouldn’t have had a thing to say about it.”
“Really?” Ashley seemed surprised.
Which made it impossible for Colin to lie to her. “No. Not really.” Colin pushed back until the steering wheel was digging into his spine.
Ashley leaned forward. There was hope in her eyes. “Why not?”
Colin dropped his hands to her knees. The blanket wasn’t covering them, or much of her anymore, so he was able to enjoy the silky texture of her skin under the rough pads of his fingers. Ashley shivered and Colin studied her face, wanting to make sure he wasn’t scaring her.
“I’m a selfish bastard. I don’t want to share you.”
“But Steph…”
“Loves the idea. She’s been trying to be subtle, probably worked better with you than it has with me.” Colin sighed. “Are you freaked out yet?”
Ashley shook her head. Her cheeks were flushed; he could see it in the moonlight that glowed through the window, spreading out over her dark hair and pale skin. She licked her lips and opened her mouth to speak.
Colin couldn’t wait any longer. Pushing up so both his knees were braced against the seat he placed his hands at either side of her face, bent down and kissed her. Ashley made a light sound in the back of her throat and put her hands on his cheeks, then slid them back into his hair.
Time lost all meaning as Colin continued to kiss her, at some point changing positions so that he could hold her in his lap again while he explored her mouth with his tongue, stealing her ability, and will, to breath. He sucked at her bottom lip one last time before he stopped and wrapped his arms around her, his big muscles relaxed as he held her head against his chest.
For a while, they both sat in silence, both lost in their own thoughts. Finally, Colin pressed his palm to her cheek and arched her head back to look at her. “Say something.”
Forbidden Steps: A Stepbrother Romance Page 6
