But Dana was right. If I’d gone to bed with any one of them, not that I’d even been tempted, it wouldn’t have been fair to them. They wouldn’t have been anything more than a rebound fuck. I let her think that it was her words that had stayed me though, from giving in to my baser needs. But the truth is that I couldn’t feel anything after the bitch left me. She didn’t just take my heart when she disappeared; she took my fucking libido and any desire to get anywhere near her scheming species again.
I glared at the door that separated us, ignoring my raging cock. But then I thought about it. Who’s to stop me? Really! I actually took a step towards the door, her earlier look of defiance playing around in my head. And then I remembered the sweet, unassuming woman I’d taken as my bride, and the shit stopped me in my tracks. Which one is real?
I walked back to my bed and fell on it after losing the towel from around my waist. I can’t believe I’d been about to go in there and do that. No matter what she’d done, she didn’t deserve that. I’d rather kill her than force myself on her. That shit makes no sense Calen you ass. You better get your shit together. You’ve got this woman in your head and mom on your ass. You need a game plan.
I rolled over and faced the wall away from the direction of that damn door. I don’t want anything other than my son. Once I figure out how to take him from her, none of the rest really matters. I’d come too close tonight to falling into her trap. Wouldn’t I be the world’s biggest idiot if I went there again if I found myself in her bed in her?
For fuck sake, stop thinking about being inside her. I buried my face in my pillow, hating us both for me wanting her. How can this shit be possible? I’ve hated her for so long, how can one innocent touch unleash such need? Instead of waning, that need kept growing. Now all the times that I took her were replaying themselves on a loop inside my head.
All the many places and positions I’d taken her in came flooding back, and this time I was at a loss to stop them. Why the fuck did she come back into my life? And why is my body betraying me? How can it want her of all people? I thought I hated her more than I’ve ever hated anyone in my life. So how can I react to her this way?
It’s going to be a long fucking night. Last night I’d been too angry, and there was too much going on with the new revelation that I had a son and heir when I’d pretty much given up on that, but now with my son here under my roof and things set in motion to get my way, it’s like the barriers were down, down enough to let that viper in. Shit, at this rate, before the night is through. I’m either going to fuck her or kill her.
* * *
GISELLE
* * *
I tossed and turned for the better part of the night, not able to get settled. My lip still tingled and stung from his kiss and my body still burned. How could I have forgotten how potent he is? I’d spent a lot of time trying to get over that, to put all of our couplings out of my head. Focusing on the baby had helped, and then life had taken care of the rest. But with one touch, it has all come rushing back again.
The gentle way in which he’d introduced me to sex. The joy I’d felt at learning that my body could give and gain such pleasure. I remember our laughter as we rolled around in his bed, the way he used to touch me, so tenderly. Not like tonight! So why did his rough treatment of me make my body react the way it did?
I can still feel the sticky wetness between my thighs. I should probably get up and wash, but I’m afraid to move around too much. My heart was still racing too hard for me to get comfortable in bed and so I ended up tossing some more, trying to find the perfect spot on the sheets that didn’t make my body feel like it was going to explode.
It had taken me a long time to get over missing that side of things. Sex, lovemaking had been such an integral part of our life together that it was one of the hardest things to overcome. There were plenty of mornings when I woke up reaching for him, only to burst into tears when reality hit.
There were times when I’d even been tempted to touch myself just to ease the ache of the pain wanting him had awakened in me, but I knew that nothing would ever suffice, nothing short of having him again. And now, after long months of getting over what we once had, why did this have to happen?
I honestly didn’t expect Calen ever to touch me again. I knew that in his eyes, I am now nothing more than damaged goods, someone not to be trusted. I know enough to know how he treats people he sees in that light, so I doubt that he’s even giving a second thought to what just happened in the garden.
I made myself crazy with my thoughts, first and foremost being how I was going to face him in the morning. I have no doubt that it was my look of hunger that had led him to do what he did. My fingers went to my lips, where I could still feel the pressure of his, and my body once again prepared itself to mate.
My breasts ached, and I rubbed my legs together to ease the need I felt growing there before rolling over and burying my head in the pillow. It’s going to be a long night.
Calen
A strange sound woke me in the middle of the night, and I sat up in bed listening for it to come again. I hit the ground running when my son’s pitiful little wail rang out in the dark. From the way he sounded, it was obvious that he’d been crying for a minute. I felt guilty as I rushed down the hallway to get to him. Just how long had he been crying that he’s this hoarse already?
My little man was standing up on his not yet steady legs, holding onto the top of the makeshift crib with big fat tears rolling down his cheeks as his lip trembled; damn near broke my heart. I think it’s the first time I’ve heard him cry, and although as his daddy, I know that it’s silly to think it, I sincerely hope that it is my last.
“Okay, baby, daddy’s here.” I lifted him and held him close to my chest as I tried to remember everything I’d learned in the crash coarse I’d given myself from YouTube videos. “Right, let’s check your diaper.” I approached it the way I would tackle any insurmountable thing like I needed to conquer.
I found the diapers, the wipes, the cream, and the medicated powder I’d bought because I read that it was good to put on him after cleaning him up. I’m not going to lie, but I pulled back the tabs of his diaper with trepidation and released a huge sigh of relief when it was only wetness I found. “Whew, thanks, buddy, for taking it easy on daddy.”
I wrestled the new diaper in place then had to use the security monitor slash computer in his room to pull up the YouTube video on how to proceed. It took some doing, but eventually, we got it right. I did notice that he wasn’t babbling at me, though, but still sniffling. Food, maybe he’s hungry.
I wasn’t sure that at his age, he was still nursing in the middle of the night, but a quick search reassured me that he might be, so I took him to his mother. Speaking of which, why the hell didn’t she come to him? I was working up a good mad when I opened the door to the room she was staying in and saw her on the bed, out cold.
How the hell am I supposed to do this? Calen Jr., upon seeing her, started to fuss again and held out his arms towards the bed. I walked closer, still not sure what to do here until common sense kicked in. I placed him on the bed next to her, but my aversion to being close to her kicked in for a second, and I was stuck. Fuck!
My son needed me; that’s the only reason I did what I did next. Mom had found her something to sleep in, I guess, and wouldn’t you know, it was one of my dress shirts. I slipped a few of the buttons open, wondering how the hell she could sleep through this shit while trying to stay detached.
Once I released her nipple, which was attached to a much fuller tit than I remember, I had to swallow really hard as I turned my son’s head towards her and led him to drink. That didn’t take too much work since lil buddy seemed to know just what to do and latched on like a limpet, though I had to get on the bed behind him and hold him in place.
She still didn’t awaken right away. Maybe she was emotionally drained from the rollercoaster ride of the last few days, but it was fine because I was enjoying this moment with my
son and her without her annoying ass knowing. No sooner had I had the thought than her eyes came slowly open. They landed on mine, and two things happened at once.
I finally remembered that I’d gone to bed naked and had rushed out of my room without stopping to rectify that, and she smiled at me. I’m not sure what the hell she’d been dreaming about before she woke up, but I was damn sure that smile wasn’t for me. But then she reached out and cupped my cheek. “Calen!”
That’s the way she used to call my name when she was feeling especially tender towards me. Before I knew what the hell I was doing, I was letting her draw me down to her until our lips were barely a breath apart. I came to my senses real fast, knew that I should pull back and away. But the moment, the sight of my son feeding from her, and the emotion of the last day and a half all culminated to make me throw caution to the wind.
Not to mention the memory of that kiss we’d shared in the garden; the kiss that had left me wanting more. Her lips gave beneath mine and opened up to let me in with my tongue, which went on a foray in her mouth. I took it slow this time, licking the inside of her soft mouth with my tongue before feeding it to her.
She suckled on my tongue, and my cock thumped against the mattress. It’s only the presence of my son that kept me from pushing her to her back and fucking my cock into her hard and deep. I did my best to chew her lips off her face though for the half an hour or so that he was on the tit before he fell asleep again, and my hand had somehow made its way to her other breast and was squeezing it gently.
I pulled back when my son dropped her nipple from his mouth and just stared as my mind went in a million directions at once. I shouldn’t be doing this; I shouldn’t get this close. But my dick was so hard, and the need was so strong. I can see how grown men and women walk into sexual traps because although my mind knew that this was wrong, that I was making a mistake, I found myself putting baby Calen in the portable playpen setup she had next to her bed before going back to her.
She opened her arms to me, still seemingly half asleep, which made her soft and pliable, which gave me lots of ideas. It’s been almost two years since I’ve fucked, not since the last time I had her, which was the night before she walked out on me. That reminder made me a little bit rougher when I took her full breasts in my hands and held them for my mouth to feed.
I chose the one that my son hadn’t drained and sucked it into my mouth, giving myself a jolt. Somehow I didn’t expect her milk to squeeze into my mouth, didn’t expect the shock of excitement it gave me either, or the way it made my cock jump and leak precum. “Touch me!” I growled the order at her before going back to feasting on her tit, which was now free-flowing onto my tongue.
I wanted her mouth, so dropped her tit and forced my tongue past her lips. She reached down between us and wrapped her soft, warm hand around my throbbing cockmeat, and I damn near drooled in her mouth. I fucked into her palm, once, twice, and then pushed her legs open with my knee and settled in between her thighs suddenly in a raging need to get inside her, deep inside her now wet slick cunt.
When I was sure that her lips were sore from mine, I went back to her plump tit for more of that sweet milk that I was now very fond of. No wonder our little piglet refuses to give that shit up. Her milk tastes like nothing I’ve ever tasted, and where I would’ve thought it if someone had asked, there was no ick factor for me. I could very well give up all other sustenance but this.
Her pussy was bare beneath the shirt, and my cock found its place between the folds of her labia. I felt her clit harden against the heated skin of my cock as I rubbed myself against her while feeding on her tit with her hand on my head. I didn’t care if she was awake by now or not; I wasn’t about to stop. I’d passed that point as soon as I came back to her bed.
I would’ve loved to have given more time, take more care, my first time back in the saddle. But as is to be expected, being this close to her for this long made me ravenous to have her, and that shit only pissed me off no end and released all the pent up anger again, and I refused to treat her like my wife, to show her any of the gentleness I once did before she threw it all back in my face.
With those thoughts in mind, I grabbed my cock and looked down into her sleepy face. “This changes nothing.” I slammed my cock into her hard without care, something I would never have done when we were married. Her body bucked, and she screamed before I covered her mouth with my hand.
“Shh, don’t wake my son.” I stroked into her, going deep, knowing that she was never very good at taking all of me like this, not without a lot of preparation, which usually entailed me, giving her my mouth. I don’t care. “Does it hurt having me inside you like this?” She didn’t answer. Just stared up at me around the hand I still had covering her mouth.
I leaned in close so that I could whisper in her ear. “I don’t care; I want to hurt you.” I almost said ‘as much as you hurt me,’ but that would be giving away too much. So instead of words, I showed her with my body. I plowed into her pussy until the bed threatened to break. I can honestly say I’ve never fucked a human being with such disregard. Her pussy is going to be extremely sore when I’m done. I don’t care.
At one point, she pounded against my back when I spread her legs over my arms and opened her up wider so that I could drill her pussy harder, deeper, and faster. She bit into my hand, and I removed it and gave her my tongue to suck on and keep her quiet before going back to her tit, which was fast becoming my favorite thing.
I will never admit it but being inside her sweet tight pussy again was like the best fucking thing to ever happen to me, except for the day I found her. I made note of the fact that her pussy was indeed tight like it hadn’t been used in a while. But then I recalled that there was another day, another thing that should’ve been numbered among the best for me, that she’d robbed me of that thing, the birth of my son, and I tried to kill her at the end of my cock.
I choked her out as I fucked her into the bed, while still nibbling on her tit. The only reason I didn’t bite that shit until it was sore the way I wanted to, the way I was very much tempted to, is because she needed it to feed my son. But the fact that I could still find such pleasure in fucking her, the fact that I could not detach myself the way I wanted to was pissing me off.
I didn’t want to enjoy her, didn’t want her to have any pleasure from my body, but it was too late. Her pussy was juicing like a split open peach on a hot summer day, and her shit had a tight ass hold on my cock as it slipped and slid inside her.
She went from pounding my back to clutching at me, trying to draw me in closer as her legs wrapped around my ass, pulling my dick harder into her as she made those cute little purring noises I remember so well. That shit pissed me off, and I pulled out of her without warning and put her on her hands and knees in front of me, wrapped my hand around her throat from behind, pulling her head back so I could look down into her eyes, and drove my cock home.
Her mouth opened on a silent scream, and I felt the waves of shock that ran through her body around my cock. Her eyes opened wide on mine pleadingly as if asking for mercy; I had none. “Calen, that hurts.” She barely choked out the words in between, taking me deep in her belly.
“You’re my wife; I’ll fuck you any way I want to.”
I put my hand on her tummy and pulled her back onto my cock hard while shoving my tongue into her mouth. I eased my twelve-inch cock from her depths before gliding back in over and over again until her pussy started frothing out a mix of cunt juice and nut serum.
Those keening noises that I knew meant I was hurting her fell from her lips each time I went too deep, but I tried not to care. This wasn’t for her; this was for me. I could care less about her pleasure. At least I told myself that while her pussy pulsed around my cock.
But then she went soft, stopped trying to fight me, and just seemed to give in. Even her lips seemed a bit softer under the assault of mine, and she eased her legs open wider and canted her ass higher so I could fuck deeper. She r
emembered.
I found myself going easier. Even though my hand was still wrapped around her throat, pulling her head back roughly at an odd angle so she could take my tongue in her mouth, my grip was no longer punishing, and even my kisses had grown less abrasive.
I was still fucking the shit out of her as opposed to making love, which the demure and delicate Giselle had never been subjected to by me, but I was being more careful with her now that the heat of my anger had started to cool; at least for now.
I was close before I knew it, something that hadn’t happened since the first three months of our relationship when I couldn’t get enough of her and stayed inside her three or four times a night. I’d learned to control myself somewhat and was able to last at least an hour inside her even though it used to kill me. But now that control was gone again.
“Should I cum in you? Should I put another kid inside you to make up for the one you robbed me of?” I don’t know where that shit came from, but at that moment, it sounded good to me. I didn’t give her a chance to answer, just squeezed my hand around her throat, found her clit with the fingers of my other hand, and slammed my cock home one last time, going into her womb the way I’d done only once or twice before because it was always too painful for her.
My cock started shooting as soon as the tip got past her cervix, hosing down the inner walls of her womb as I imagined planting my son or daughter inside her again. That little voice in my head whispered that it was an excuse, that I’d done this as a way to tie her to me, to make it harder for her to escape me again.
“Fuck off!” Shit, she’s going to think I was talking to her. I don’t care. I told myself as I pulled out and put her on her back to start on her all over again.
Dare To Love Again Page 6
