by Lucinda John
“I don’t know to be honest. I have all these mixed emotions that I just want to be alone.”
“So, what are you going to do?” I asked stroking her hair.
“I’mma go talk to a divorce lawyer just in case.”
“Ok, well for now, you have to chill out and not stress the baby out. Just take it a day at a time, don’t rush into anything without giving it some thought first.”
“I hear you,” she replied just before her stomach began to beg for food. “The food done?”
“Yes greedy let’s go eat.”
We walked downstairs hand in hand only to see Chad and Rob eating in the family room while playing a game of Call of Duty Black Ops on his Xbox One. Our eyes met and I gave Rob an ‘I’m gonna fuck you up later’ look. Cinnamon and I both made our plates and went back upstairs to eat in her room.
“What is he doing here?” Cinnamon sighed before forking some greens and stuffing it in her mouth.
“I don’t know. You want me to go fuck him up like I did that hoe Chasity?”
“Nah, it’s good, I’m glad you fucked her up though,” she laughed.
“Yasss, I was waiting on that moment. I dug in that ass real good for ya too!” I replied as we high fived.
“Honey, can you do me a favor?” she asked as she filled her mouth with steak.
“Yes anything for you my love.”
“Can you get me some seconds please, this time I want a lot of greens.”
“Anything for you greedy,” I laughed getting up to fulfill her request.
I was in the kitchen Fixing Cinnamon some seconds when Chad came in and placed his plate in the sink.
“Wash it nigga, you ain’t got no maid here,” I snapped.
“Why you doing me like this, Honey?” He asked as he put dish detergent on the sponge.
“Why you did my sister like that?” I countered.
“I wasn’t thinking, Honey, I fucked up,” he said rinsing the plate.
“Yes, you did. She is pregnant with your child, Chad, and you got her in there crying and shit.”
“I know, I’mma fix it.”
“How when she’s looking up divorce lawyers to call?” I replied giving his ass a wakeup call.
The words ‘divorce lawyer’ slapped him in the face and had him looking like he just got done sucking on some sour candy. I hated when niggas waited until their woman was fed up to start paying them any mind. I was really rooting for Cinnamon and Chad to work it out because they had that love you just didn’t throw away. But if she decided to go her separate ways, I could completely understand why.
“I have to fix this, Honey, that girl is my heart,” he sincerely answered.
“Well go take her this,” I said placing the hefty plate of food in his hands. “Work it out, Chad, she really loves you.”
“I love her, too,” he said before walking out of the kitchen.
Chapter 9
Cinnamon
“He gone yet?” I asked hearing the room door open.
“Nah, I’m still here,” Chad answered causing me to roll my eyes in disgust. “Here.” He placed the plate of food in front of me and took a seat on the red futon that decorated the room.
“You made me lose my appetite,” I said putting the plate of food on the night table.
“You better feed my baby.”
I just sat there staring in the eyes of the man that I loved so much. I couldn’t believe that someone so sweet and gentle could cause me so much pain. We were as thick as thieves and for him to shut me out like he did broke my heart into a million pieces.
I wasn’t going to lie and say I didn’t love him because I did. I just wanted the pain that I was feeling to vanish. I wasn’t sure if getting a divorce would do that, I was now beyond confused on what to do.
“CJ is coming home tomorrow,” he said breaking the silence.
“I know,” I replied.
I was ecstatic that my baby was finally well enough to be released. At least with him home, I would be too busy caring for him to even think about Chad. I spent three long months away from my child there was so much making up that needed to be done.
“Are you coming back home?” Chad asked redirecting my thoughts back to him.
“What home?” I asked.
“The one you have with me your husband, the one we built together as a family…”
“The one you got that bitch staying in,” I said cutting him off. “I’ll pass.”
“You not finna have my son staying in this small ass guestroom.”
“You tickle me, Chad! How the fuck you go from having a gun to my head saying I played you and CJ is not yours to giving a fuck about where he laid his head at?!” I was now enraged by his bipolar-ness.
“I know he’s mine.”
“Is that so?”
“Yes!! Like I said, he is not going to be living here!”
“I’ll just find me a place then.” I shrugged.
“With what money?” he smirked.
“My fucking money that I been had before I started fucking with you! I was a paid bitch before I met you, Chad, I been getting’ money.”
“Oh, I forgot you was setting niggas up for money with that pimp ass nigga.”
POW!
With a balled up fist, I punched Chad upside his head. He grabbed his ear with a grimace on his face. He got up and I got all in his personal space with a mug on my face daring that he put his hands on me.
“Yup and I still got that money sitting pretty in my bank account from when I was supposed to set your ass up,” I fired without thinking.
The moment those words flew out my mouth, I began to feel bad. I instantly regretted saying it because it was all out of anger. Chad gave me one last look before getting up, leaving, and slamming the door behind him. My chest heaved up and down as I breathed heavily. My vision began to get blurry as hot tears began to fall. If it wasn’t over before, it was definitely over now.
The next morning, I woke up with a terrible headache. With this pregnancy, I’d been having bad headaches, so I jotted this concern down for my next doctor’s visit. Walking in the bathroom, I turned on the shower, wrapped up my hair and brushed my teeth as I waited for the water to get nice and warm.
Allowing the water to dance all over my body, I grabbed the rag, soaped it up with the Dial ginger tea body wash, and began to lather my body with it. After washing every crevice of my body, I rinsed off and stood under the showerhead. My thoughts began to eat at me like red ants as realization of me not being with the one I love began to set in. My tears mixed with the now cold water as I stood there and silently cried.
My skin started to wrinkle, so I decided to get out of the tub. Plugging in the curling wand, I dried off my body and began to apply my Amber Romance body butter courtesy of Victoria Secret. Once my body was nice and moisturized, I started to wind curl my hair making a mental note to have Honey install a quick sew in for me. Unlike most, I had nice, long hair; I just loved the dramatic look the weave gave me.
Perfectly penciling in my eyebrows, I did my lashes, then applied a light coat of M.A.C foundation. I was feeling like shit, but I refused to have myself looking like it. Polishing my full lips with some M.A.C De-Nude lip-gloss, I made sure my face was beat to perfection before getting dressed.
It was a beautiful, sunny day in South Florida, so I decided to wear a pink and white floral tank top dress. I strapped my pink Michael Kors sandals around my ankles, which matched my pink Michael Kors tote. Grabbing my Michael Kors shades, I made my way downstairs.
“Ooooh kill em’!” Honey snapped her fingers as I took a seat in front of her at the dining room table. “Hunty, you look fabulous!”
“Thank you,” I replied taking a bite of the three-meat omelet she placed in front of me.
“Fat butt always eating!” Rob joked and stole a piece of bacon off my plate
“I’m not fat, I’m just real healthy,” I la
ughed. “Honey, let me push your whip until I get me a new one.”
“Why don’t you go home and drive one of your many cars?” Rob suggested.
“No, I’m not trying to see Chad ass, and if I go over there and see that bitch, I’mma lose the Jesus that I found and beat her ass!”
“Women always gotta make stuff difficult.”
“Men, they just never understand,” Honey interjected. “What you tryna push?” she asked me.
“That Audi, you already know.”
Honey went to the key holder, grabbed the keys, and tossed them to me.
“Call me when you going to go pick up CJ.”
“Ok,” I replied taking one last bite of my food before walking out the door.
I allowed Chad to sit with CJ until it was time for him to be released. I had an appointment to meet with a realtor, it was so last minute, but I was determined to at least purchase a house before it was time for me to pick up CJ. I pulled into the Starbucks; I was schedule to meet Steven, the realtor I found in the yellow pages.
I spotted a fine ass chocolate brother sitting at the table by the window. He was so engrossed in the paperwork and laptop that was in front of him that he didn’t notice me drooling over him.
“How may I help you?” one of the Starbucks workers asked me.
“I’m supposed to meet a Steven here,” I replied never taking my eyes off the gentlemen that caught my attention.
“That fine brother you’re staring at is Steven,” she said causing me to give her a surprised look. “Yeah, he is all that and a bag of chips,” she said with a smile.
“That he is,” I whispered before swallowing the huge lump that formed in my throat and walking over to him.
“Steven?” I asked for assurance.
“Yes, you must be Cinnamon,” he said offering a panty dropping smile. “Have a seat so we could get started.”
I took a seat and studied him as he pulled up all the listings that matched what I was looking for. Looking him over, he reminded me of a younger Blair Underwood. The Armani suit that he wore gave him a very sexy sophisticated look.
“I found a few houses that meet your standards and are ready to move in,” he said turning his laptop towards me so that I could take a look through them.
After scrolling through a few of the houses, I decided on a nice three bedroom, two-bathroom town house. My new home was located on Alton Road, which was five miles away from the house I used to share with Chad. I followed Steven to the house and instantly fell in love with it. The house was everything I wanted plus more.
What sold me was the security that the association provided to the homeowners. If you didn’t authorize a guest then they wouldn’t be allowed to enter. That would limit Chad from making all of those random pop ups.
After reading over the buyer’s agreement, I signed my name on the dotted line and handed over the forty thousand dollar check. Retrieving the keys to my new house was the greatest experience because I purchased it with my own hard earned money. I had money that Chad had put into my account, but I vowed to never touch that money unless it was for the kids.
“Do you know any nice properties that I can lease out for my business?” I asked Steven as he prepared his things to leave.
“Yes I do. What type of business do you run if you don’t mind me asking?”
“No, not at all. I am an interior designer and event planner.”
“Really?” he asked with a smile.
“Yes really.”
“Faith works in amazing ways. I’ve been looking for someone to decorate the new house that I purchased in Golden Beach. Maybe we can meet up for lunch and I’ll show you some listings and you can show me some of your work.”
“Deal,” I said shaking his hand as we exchanged numbers.
His touch alone had my body overheating like a rundown car. I watched him get in his car and drive off before walking back into my new home. Inside my house, I walked around trying to create a vision on how I wanted everything decorated. After thinking it over, I pulled out my iPad and immediately started ordering furniture for every room. I paid the extra fee to have everything delivered the following day. Looking down at my Michael Kors watch, three hours had passed and it was time for me to head out to the hospital.
When I walked in the room, Chad had CJ laying across his chest as they watched Mickey Mouse Clubhouse. I somehow caught CJ’s attention and he began to squeal causing my heart to melt. I reached over and picked him up placing wet kisses all over his face.
“He got discharged an hour ago,” Chad spoke up.
“I got caught up house shopping.”
“Oh. Cool. Well c’mon so I can put the car seat in the car.”
Holding CJ tightly in my arms, I followed Chad to his car. I watched him as he unhooked the car seat then hooked it up in Honey’s car. He handed me CJ’s discharge papers then reached for him. Watching them interact made me smile. I hated that we couldn’t live together as a family, but I had to get myself together and figure out if this marriage was something I really wanted. So much damage was already done.
“When do y’all move in the new place?”
“After I get everything situated.”
“You renting?”
“No, I bought the house.”
“Wow,” he said handing CJ back to me.
“Wow, what?”
“So, it’s fuck me, huh?” he asked with a sad look on his face.
“What are you talking about?”
“Nothing, do you, just let me know when I can see my son. Keep me updated on the baby, too,” he said getting in his car.
“Chad?” I called out before he could pull off.
“I’m listening.”
“You think I can drop off CJ later on for the weekend? I really need to set the house up.”
“You ain’t never gotta ask me to watch my kids,” he said before pulling off.
CJ and I spent the rest of the day shopping for our new house. After giving him a nice warm bath, I dressed him in his PJ’s and handed him a nice, warm bottle filled with rice baby cereal. He lay in my arms on the queen sized airbed as I read him a story. After thinking about it, I decided to go to his dad’s house.
A wave of emotions hit me like a ton of bricks when I pulled up to what should have been my family home. I blinked back the tears before getting out the car. With CJ in tow, I walked up to the door and rang the doorbell.
“How may I help you?” Chasity answered the door wearing a pair of shorts and a tank top looking real comfortable.
“Is Chad here?” I said really wanting to curse her out, but out of respect of my son, I decided not to.
“No, he’s in the shower. I can tell him…” I pushed my way into the house cutting her off. Technically, half of this house belonged to me.
Walking upstairs to CJ’s room, I placed him in his crib. I then went in the master bathroom where Chad was taking a shower. The steam from the shower gave me a facial as I burst through the door, pushing the sliding door back, and exposing his naked body.
“I want this bitch out my fucking house now! I had a long day, I’m tired, I need a hot shower and I would like to sleep in my bed. Which room was she staying in, so I can help her pack her things?” I asked.
“The room across from the movie room,” he responded.
I left him standing there dick exposed and all. I walked in the kitchen grabbed some garbage bags then walked in the room Chasity was staying in. I was not going to let this bitch think shit was sweet. She was sitting on the bed painting her toes when I barged in and started throwing her shit in the garbage bags.
“Put my shit back!” she yelled trying to get in my face.
“Unless you want an ass whooping worse than what my sister gave you, I suggest you shut up and come help me pack your shit!” I spat.
She walked out the room in search for Chad as I continued ripping her shit off of hangers and stuffing th
em in the bags. The bitch had made herself at home hanging her clothes on hangers and shit. The more I packed her clothes, the angrier I got.
After all her shit was packed, I threw them out the door and sat on the couch with my legs crossed.
“Chad, you’re going to sit here and let her throw my shit out?” Chasity cried.
“I been told you to pack and leave, but you wanted to be hard headed and shit,” Chad responded.
“You got five minutes to get the fuck out of my house before I put you out,” I said getting up.
Chad held onto me by the waist to avoid me getting close to her.
“Chas, just go, now!” he yelled causing her to jump and scurry like a rat caught in the light.
I held the door open for her with a smirk on my face. She walked out in shame as she bent down and picked up her things. She tried to say something, but before she could get the words out of her mouth, I slammed the door.
“I’m about to go take a shower, when I get out, I want them sheets changed.”
“How you gon come in here demanding shit?”
“Half of this fucking house is mine in case you forgot!” I yelled.
“Ok, so you got half of a fucking mansion, so why the fuck did you go out and buy another fucking house?” he yelled back.
“I’m too tired to argue with you do as I say please.”
“I’m not finna play these games with you, Cinnamon!”
“Who playing, Chad, I’m fucking tired all I want to do is sleep! If it’s that much of a hassle, I can go back to Honey’s house.”
“If you wasn’t pregnant with my baby, I’d ring your fucking neck!” He said grabbing some blankets out of the linen closet.
I checked on my son, he was still peacefully sleeping. I walked past Chad who was stripping the bed and made my way to the bathroom. Plugging the tub, I filled it with warm water and poured some lavender bubbles in it. Stepping out of my clothes, I eased my body in the tub and enjoyed the way the warm water felt against my skin.
“Your food is in the oven,” Chad said as soon as I walked in the room after my bath.
He grabbed a few pillows and blanket then walked out of the room. For some strange reason, I was expecting him to be laying in bed waiting for me. I was expecting him to try to eat his way out of this situation. I wanted to be held even though I was mad. I wanted him to pin me up against the wall and demand that I brought my ass back home, but he didn’t. Instead, he went to go sleep in our son’s room.
