‘Tommy, your friends have asked if you can spend the day with them and I’ve given my permission,’ Ray said.
‘I don’t fancy going out,’ Tommy retorted.
‘Oh, come on, Tom. It’s Mum’s birthday and we’re going to a steak restaurant. She’d be proper made up to see you. She’s always asking after ya and if we turn up with you, it’ll be the best surprise ever.’
‘I dunno. I’ve not been wanting to do much lately.’
‘All the more reason you should come out with us then. My old man’ll be there, and Donna,’ Danny grinned. He knew his pal had once had a crush on his sister.
‘You can’t blow us out, Tom. It took us over an hour to get here. Traffic was diabolical,’ Ronnie added.
Even though Tommy had little interest in girls, he had never forgotten how pretty Donna Darling was.
‘I’ll leave yous to it,’ Ray said diplomatically, before disappearing back inside the house.
‘Come on, Tom. It’ll be a laugh. We’re gonna pop in the Lord Nelson first, have a couple of beers. That’s my dad’s local. What’s not to enjoy, eh?’
‘Where’s the Lord Nelson?’ Tommy enquired.
‘Bermondsey.’
‘I really don’t fancy going back there. Say I’m recognized?’
‘By who? For what?’ Ronnie asked.
Tommy bowed his head. ‘Ya know,’ he mumbled, feeling ashamed.
‘Oh Tommy. Hand on heart, nobody knows nothing,’ Ronnie insisted, finally realizing and instantly forgiving young Tommy for turning his back on the family. ‘After what happened, Danny told me what you’d told him. We agreed to keep it between us. Apart from us, nobody even knows your uncle was arrested, do they, Dan?’
‘Nope. Scout’s honour.’
‘What about your family?’ Tommy asked.
‘Not said a word to ’em,’ Ronnie lied. He had actually told his parents, but no way would they ever betray his trust.
‘Nothing that happened was your fault, Tom. You were only a kid back then. Why don’t we all agree never to mention that perve again and start afresh? You can’t be blanking me any more. I won’t let ya. We’re blood brothers, don’t forget,’ Danny grinned.
Remembering the time they’d cut themselves on purpose, Tommy couldn’t help but smile. ‘OK. I’ll come.’
Having stopped at a greasy spoon along the A13 for a fry-up, by the time they reached Bermondsey, Tommy felt more at ease.
Apart from looking a bit older and his hair being shorter, Danny had not changed at all. It was over two years since Tommy had last seen his one-time best pal and it felt like only yesterday.
‘You ready to meet the old man? He’s a scary-looking bastard, but don’t worry, he won’t bite,’ Ronnie laughed, opening the pub door.
The first thing Tommy noticed about Jack Darling was his presence. He was standing with a group of men, a few were taller than him, but for some reason Tommy couldn’t put his finger on, Jack stood out from the crowd.
Jack held out his right hand. ‘Hello, Tommy. It’s a pleasure to finally meet you, son. What can I get you to drink?’
‘Erm, can I have a Coke, please?’
‘Ignore that, Dad. He’ll have a lager, same as me,’ Danny said. ‘We’re gonna sit at that table in the corner.’
‘That’s well cool your dad lets you drink,’ Tommy said, as Ronnie placed two halves of lager in front of him and Danny.
‘I came home pissed from a party a few months back and my dad went mental,’ Danny admitted. ‘He said he didn’t want me to drink behind his back any more and I was to only touch alcohol in front of him. He don’t let me have much. Two or three halves at the most.’
Feeling grown-up, Tommy sipped his beer and studied Jack Darling. His features were chiselled, his dark hair wavy and he was dressed in a smart navy suit. Tommy knew he’d served ten years for shooting and killing a man and felt a bit in awe of him.
Ronnie stayed at the bar with his father, which enabled Tommy and Danny to have a proper heart to heart. Tommy spoke openly about Smiffy’s death and how he’d turned to booze since to ease the pain. ‘The fairground worker said in his statement he heard Smiffy call my name, Dan. He must have thought he’d spotted me, but I weren’t even there at the time he died. If only I was.’ He also told Danny about going to the Railway in Stratford to meet his real dad and beating up Wayne Bradley.
‘I can’t believe you’re half Irish pikey,’ Danny laughed.
‘Don’t say that. It ain’t funny.’
‘I’m only messing with ya. Your father sounds like a right arsehole, though, so you’ll have to share mine. I know the authorities wouldn’t let you live with us ’cause of me dad’s record, but they can’t stop you moving in with us when you’re sixteen, Tom. Ronnie’s moved out now ya know. He’s got this bachelor pad with his pal and they’re forever taking birds back there,’ Danny chuckled. ‘You can have his old room. My mum wouldn’t mind. I know it’s sad Smiffy’s dead, but he wouldn’t want you to fuck your future up. You need to get back to your boxing and look forward, not backwards.’
About to reply, Tommy’s jaw dropped. Dressed in bright green hot-pants and white patent high-heeled boots, Donna Darling looked like a glamour model. She walked over to where they were sitting. ‘All right? Where’s Dad?’ she asked Danny.
‘Dunno. Probably in the khazi. You ain’t planning on going to the restaurant looking like that, are ya? Dad’ll go fucking mental if you are.’
Donna blew and burst a bubble with her gum, then grinned at Tommy. ‘I know you from somewhere, don’t I?’
Donna looked about five foot ten in her high platform boots and Tommy had never seen anybody with such long, perfect legs. He could barely take his eyes off them, let alone reply.
‘You remember Tommy. He lived in South London for a while and I knocked about with him. He used to come round ours for tea.’
Not knowing what else to do, Tommy stood up and held out his right hand. Instead of shaking it, Donna laughed. ‘Yeah, I remember. Blimey, you’ve grown. You used to be a little squirt. You’re quite easy on the eye now an’ all.’
‘Donna,’ a voice boomed.
Blowing Tommy a kiss, Donna strutted over to her father and was promptly told to ‘Get yourself home and put something decent on.’
‘Don’t be having any designs on her. She’s trouble with a capital T,’ Danny warned his pal.
‘I’m not. I wouldn’t,’ Tommy stammered. ‘She’s way out of my league and too old for me anyway.’
Danny put his hand over his mouth and leaned towards Tommy. ‘She’s knocking about with some fucking Turk. Ronnie caught ’em in a clinch outside a boozer and gave the bloke a dig. If my dad finds out, there’ll be murders, trust me.’
When his mum was alive, Tommy had been taken to a couple of restaurants, but never one as posh as this. It was in the West End of London and not only had Tommy never been to the West End before, but the juicy steak, giant mushrooms, sautéed potatoes and peas dripping in butter tasted simply divine.
Jack ordered the waiter to pour a drop of bubbly into Tommy and Danny’s flutes. ‘Not too much, mind. Half a glass, that’s all,’ he added.
‘What about me?’ asked thirteen-year-old Eugene.
‘Just a sip for him,’ Jack said, before standing up and holding his glass aloft. ‘Happy Birthday to the best wife and mother in the world. Not only did you stand by me, Suzie, when many women would have walked, you have done a wonderful job raising our children. Well, apart from Donna that is,’ Jack chuckled.
Everybody laughed, including Donna, therefore Tommy felt at ease joining in too. There was only the seven of them, the Darling family and himself. All of them had made him feel so welcome.
Tommy hated the taste of champagne, but pretended to like it.
‘I’ve got a little speech too,’ Suzie Darling announced.
‘Go, Mum,’ Ronnie clapped.
Sitting next to Tommy, Donna put her hand on his leg. ‘This’ll be g
ood,’ she whispered in his ear.
Tommy felt his face blush as her hand moved towards his thigh. For the second time in forty-eight hours he had an erection.
‘I just want to say, I’ve had the best birthday ever. My presents are all wonderful, but there is one more thing I’d like.’
His wife had spoken to him earlier, so Jack knew exactly what she was going to say. ‘What, dear?’ he asked, playing along with the moment. His Suzie had a heart of gold and that boy had been through a lot.
‘Tommy, will you do us the honour of moving into our spare room when you leave Maylands? Not only would Jack and I welcome you with open arms, we could do with some extra help around the house now Ronnie has moved out,’ Suzie grinned.
Tommy was flabbergasted. ‘Erm, I dunno what to say.’
‘Say yes, ya div,’ laughed Danny.
‘There’ll also be a job waiting for you, Tommy. A proper job, working for me,’ Jack said. ‘I have a legitimate business now. I supply gaming machines to pubs and clubs. Ronnie is already working for me and so will Danny and Eugene when they leave school. Not only will you be on a decent wage, you’ll be part of our family,’ Jack said proudly.
‘He ain’t having my room,’ Eugene piped up.
‘He wouldn’t want your filthy room,’ Suzie chortled.
Ronnie held his hands out. ‘Surely that’s an offer you can’t refuse, Tommy?’
Donna put her hand on Tommy’s leg again. ‘Just say yes,’ she urged.
Six pairs of eyes keenly awaiting his decision, Tommy felt a bit choked up. Smiffy had been his future. They were going to share a flat and make something of their lives together, but now he’d gone, what else did he have?
Relieved that his erection had deflated, Tommy stood up and held his glass aloft. ‘Thank you so much. I’d love to take you up on your extremely kind offer.’
Jack ordered another bottle of bubbly before walking around the table and clenching Tommy’s right hand. ‘Welcome to the family, son.’
Little did Tommy know at that point what ‘Welcome to the family’ actually meant.
CHAPTER SIXTEEN
Spring 1976
‘Where we going then?’ Scratch asked. She was happy to be spending the whole day alone with Tommy, but was dreading him walking out that door on Monday morning. He was her soulmate and even though she’d never tell him that, Scratch worshipped the ground Tommy walked on.
‘Well, seeing as it’s such a nice day, I thought we’d go to Southend. I don’t wanna go to the fairground, but there’s the amusement arcades and the beach. I got plenty of dosh on me. We can have a nice bit of fish and chips washed down with a few ciders. How’s that sound?’
Scratch linked arms with Tommy. Apart from a few drunken fumbles, nothing had happened between them. Scratch wished it would though. She wanted Tommy to be her first consensual lover, and hopefully her last.
On the train, Tommy stared out of the window deep in thought. He couldn’t believe how quickly the months had flown by since it had been decided he would move in with the Darlings.
It had been Ray’s idea that he stay at the Darlings’ beforehand to make sure he’d be happy there. Tommy had spent two weekends there per month and enjoyed his visits every time. He and Danny were more like brothers than pals and if they weren’t down the boxing gym, they’d be with Jack earning some extra pocket money or having a couple of beers in the pub with him and Ronnie. Suzie was a true diamond. Nobody would ever replace his real mum, but Tommy knew he was blessed as Suzie was truly the next best thing. She even fussed over him like a mother.
‘What you thinking?’ Scratch asked.
‘That part of me will be sad to leave Shitlands. I’m gonna miss you big time. I know I’ve had flare-ups in the past with Ray and Connie, but they can’t help being naïve. Their hearts are in the right place. I think I’ll miss them too, a bit, and Benny.’
Knowing he had a decent home and job awaiting him was all Tommy had needed to get his life back on track. He’d made peace with Benny and Dumbo, got back into his boxing, cut down on the booze and had even given up thieving. Going out on the rob wasn’t the same without Smiffy, and besides, Jack Darling had warned him to keep his nose clean.
Scratch squeezed Tommy’s hand. ‘You’ll be fine. What’s the betting you forget about all of us once you start work? You probably won’t even remember our names by Christmas,’ she chuckled.
Tommy threw a casual arm around Scratch’s shoulders. ‘No way will I ever forget about you. You’re a one-off, ya nutter.’
The sun was blazing and it was exceedingly warm for the time of year. The beach was mobbed, but Tommy still managed to bag himself and Scratch a spot next to a group of teenage lads who had a radio playing at full blast.
‘I hate this poxy song. Why is it every radio station insists on playing it every five bloody minutes?’ Tommy complained. He was referring to Brotherhood of Man’s ‘Save Your Kisses for Me’.
‘Probably ’cause it won the Eurovision, Tommy,’ Scratch replied, before singing along with the lyrics to wind Tommy up.
Tommy cracked open two cans and handed Scratch a cider. ‘Stop warbling and get that down your ’atch.’
‘I’m so pleased you’ve got a nice family to move in with. Dumbo hates it in his bedsit, I overheard Connie telling Ray. It scares me a bit that in July it’ll be me leaving. Say they stick me in some shitty bedsit and I can’t get a job either?’
‘You’ll be fine. You’re a much stronger person than Dumbo. I’ll be working, so I’ll be able to help you out. If they put you in a dump, I’ll put a deposit down for somewhere decent for ya.’
‘You still gonna write to me?’ Scratch asked.
‘Yeah, course.’
‘And visit?’
Tommy nodded. ‘I promise.’
‘You better – or else, Tommy Boyle,’ Scratch laughed.
‘I’m burnt. Look at my arms,’ Scratch announced. She had thankfully stopped self-harming, but still had scars on her arms from where she’d cut herself in the past.
‘Ray reckons the weatherman said this is gonna be our hottest summer in years. I’ve burned myself too. Look,’ Tommy urged, lowering the waistband on his jeans to show Scratch how red his stomach was.
‘And your freckles have sprouted,’ Scratch laughed. ‘What time we heading back?’
Tommy glanced at his watch. ‘It’s only just gone four. We ain’t due back until ten. What else do you fancy doing?’
‘Let’s head back to Dagenham, get some more booze and sit over the Castle.’
Tommy stood up and held out his hand. ‘Your wish is my command, ya pisshead.’
‘I’m getting a bit chilly now. Let’s sit inside the Castle,’ Scratch suggested.
Tommy climbed through the window, then held his hand out for Scratch. ‘Be careful, there’s broken glass on the floor.’
‘Do you reckon this really was a castle in the past?’
‘Dunno. I suppose it must have been if that’s what everyone calls it. Looks more like an old war bunker to me though.’
Scratch put her arms around Tommy’s neck. ‘Gissa kiss, then.’
Tommy placed his arms around Scratch’s waist. Ever since he’d seen Donna Darling again, he kept feeling horny. So much so, he’d recently taken up masturbating.
‘Scratch, stop it,’ Tommy groaned, as she began stroking his erection.
‘Why?’ Scratch whispered, as she tugged at the zip of Tommy’s jeans.
As his penis hit the fresh air, it leapt into action like a cobra rearing its ugly head.
Hoping this would happen, Scratch had purposely worn her black miniskirt with her Dr Martens today. She lifted it up, pulled down her knickers and kicked them off.
Grabbing her by the buttocks, Tommy lifted Scratch up and placed her back against the wall. ‘We really shouldn’t be doing this,’ he gasped, as she wrapped her legs around his waist.
‘Oh, Tommy,’ Scratch moaned.
Not really knowing
what he was doing, Tommy pumped away like there was no tomorrow. He could hear cats fighting nearby, making awful noises.
‘I love you, Tommy,’ Scratch whispered.
Tommy didn’t reply. Instead he made a weird noise similar to the fighting cats and for the next few seconds, thought he had died and gone to heaven.
Tommy woke up the following morning with a smile on his face. He’d really enjoyed what had happened; it kind of made him feel normal. Masturbation was nothing in comparison to actually doing it, he’d decided. But he still couldn’t help feeling a bit confused and guilty. He did love Scratch, in his own way, but he didn’t look at her in the same way he looked at Donna Darling. Scratch was a skinhead, a tomboy. Whereas Donna looked like a female should.
A tap on the door disturbed Tommy’s thoughts. ‘Come in,’ he shouted.
‘You OK?’ Ray asked.
‘Yeah. Sorry we were a bit late last night. It was my fault, not Scratch’s.’
‘No problem. You wasn’t that late and, if Connie asks, I didn’t notice you were slightly inebriated either,’ Ray smiled.
‘Thanks, Ray. You’re a good man. Thank you for all you have done for me.’
Ray’s eyes welled up. ‘Get yourself washed and dressed, Tommy. Today is all about you, son.’
*
As expected, Ray and Connie’s surprise was a party held in his honour. They’d made so much effort, decorating the games room with balloons and a banner wishing him good luck, that Tommy didn’t have the heart to tell them he’d gone past the jelly and ice-cream stage.
Connie brought in trays of sausage rolls, chicken drumsticks and sandwiches. ‘Who’s hungry?’ she chuckled.
While the younger kids made a grab for the food, Tommy gestured for Scratch to follow him into the garden. They hadn’t had a chance to talk yet, not properly anyway.
Tommy sat on the bench. ‘You OK?’
Scratch smiled. She felt awkward, not because they’d had sex, but because of what she’d blurted out. ‘Yeah, I’m fine.’
‘Look, about last night. I’m—’
The Sting Page 15
