A Stormy Knight

by Amy Mullen

  Nicholas glanced up. His eyes were wild as he surveyed the scene around them. "The stables are to be searched!" he bellowed. "I want to know what he ate to break his fast this morn. Who was with him?"

  "I was, milord," Oliver de Toeni said as he took off his gloves. "We were out riding in the wood together as we do most mornings before dawn. When we returned, he ate in the hall, and I ate after."

  Nicholas stared at him and then nodded, as if the words took a while to register. Father Darius came in, and there was much confusion as men went back to their posts but also ran to do their lord's bidding.

  "Is he injured?" the priest asked, lifting his hand to his forehead in disbelief.

  "Nay," Nicholas shook his head, "I do not think so. I see no injury, but I have not had much time. He fell and he sleeps. 'Tis all I know."

  "This had become far too common here," the priest said to no one in particular. "We shall arrange to have him taken to the empty quarters in the solar."

  Gemma had not said much and had stayed back. She knew this was something she could help with, so she rushed off to find some assistance. Gavin's quarters between her father's and her own were vacant, and that was the perfect place for Willis to rest. It appeared Nicholas was greatly troubled and having him close might help. Servants were already in motion upon hearing the command of Father Darius, so there was not much she could do to help after all.

  After Willis was taken to the solar, Nicholas grabbed Gemma by the arm and pulled her into their quarters. He was shaking. His face was dark and stormy.

  "If anything happens to him, I shall never forgive myself," he began and then stopped. He walked to look out the window with his back to her.

  "'Tis not your fault," she said, not sure if she should go to him or remain where she was. "But I feel as you do. Willis is a fine man, and this is truly unbearable."

  "You do not understand, woman," he said, his voice low and hoarse. "Willis was the only person I trusted for a long time. He and I met when Henry was crowned, and we served together. When it came time to come here, he was the first to step up to come with me. He has no family. I am all he knows. And now," he paused with his head bent, "now I have failed him."

  "Nay!" she said, walking to him. She stopped behind him, still not sure if she should touch him or not. "You did not do this."

  "I have not stopped it."

  "I do not see it that way. You have been tireless and diligent. You are not God. You cannot see all and know all," she replied.

  "You would not understand," he said. "I should have ended this long ago. I came here out of revenge without thinking through what it truly meant to be here. My attentions toward you have taken me from my goals. Willis is ill, and the others have died because of my blunderings. I never should have come here no matter what Henry commanded. You have been the root of all of the evil in my life."

  Her heart twisted within her. The room spun around her. Had he just blamed her for all that had happened here?

  "You do not mean it," she whispered.

  "Aye, I do! Had I been on guard, Phillip would not have been near you. My men would not be missing, and Willis would be well. I have been too kind and too lenient on the people within these walls. I have become soft, and 'tis because of you. "

  Hot tears hit Gemma's cheeks as she clenched her fists at her sides, her nails digging into her flesh. His anger was palpable.

  He continued, "Had I kept my guard up and my heart hard, Willis would not be lying in a bed, unaware of the world around him. Had I kept you where you belong, Rulnoff would not have been hurt. Had I become true lord of this castle, you would still be paying for what happened to me!"

  She cringed as he picked up a stool and threw it at the stone wall with so much force it crumbled upon impact. Splintered legs landed on the floor and scattered.

  "You are a brute," she said through clenched teeth, "and as soon as I can, I will be away from you. You still hold your past in my face as if I had a hand in it. You blame me for your pain. You came here to hurt me and my family, and now, even though you know the truth, you still push me away and treat me as if I were a mere distraction of no importance to you."

  "My involvement with you was a mistake right from the beginning. Had I never come in the night to meet you, we would not be here today."

  "You are maddening!" she spit out, her anger and pain coming to the surface. "Despite all you have learned, you still blame me. I do not know how to believe anything you have told me."

  "You defy me," he said as he spun around to face her, "and you do it at every opportunity. You have caused me great pain, and I will have no more of it. You lead my men astray and cause them to be weak. I cannot be lord with you undermining my authority within these walls!"

  Gemma steadied her voice, her only option clear, "I shall leave then. I will go to my uncle in Wales. We shall remain married. There is nothing that can change that, so your hold on this land is secure. 'Tis all you care for. I once loved it here, but living with a man who does not know how to trust me is too much to bear."

  "You are my wife, like it or hate it, and you will do as you are told! You will stay out of my way, and you will not step foot outside of the keep until I say so." His entire body was tense, his voice harsh.

  "Nay," she said while lifting her chin, "I shall leave. What you do not know, Nicholas de Reymes, is that I love you."

  He froze as she spoke but did not say anything.

  "And because of that love" she continued, tears falling in earnest, "I can no longer abide this life. For the second time, loving you has been a mistake. My feelings betray me, and they anger you. I will be gone before I cause you more pain. I will take Isabel with me, and my father can come when he is up to travel. All I ask is you treat him well in my absence."

  "You will do no such thing!" he said. "It makes no sense, and I will not have you telling me what you are going to do. You are my wife, and you will do as I say. I will keep you safe, and I cannot do that if you are not here."

  "'Tis not up to you," she said, her voice low, "and you will not stop me. I love you, but I must be stronger than love. I realize now you feel I am the cause of all pain here. 'Tis only right I lift the burden and leave so all who reside here are safe." She abruptly left the room, unable to face him for a moment longer.

  The silence killed her. She wanted to fall into a heap, but she stayed strong and walked down the passageway toward the nursery. She would speak to her father and gather Isabel and Hesse. They would leave before the next nightfall.

  She was not meant for love. It was nothing but pain, and she would see to it no one ever hurt her in that way again, even if it meant leaving everything she loved behind.

  ****

  Nicholas stood where he was for a long time after she had left the room. Her declaration of love had caught him unaware. She loved him. No matter how angry he had been and how frustrated he felt, he could not have been more shocked.

  He knew he should have stopped where he was and taken her to him as his wife. A smart man would have kept his anger at himself in check. Instead, the declaration had scared him as much as it had warmed him, and he reacted badly. Willis depended on him, and he had failed him. Now, he had also failed his wife. Despite all the anger he had displayed, she had found a way to love him.

  There was no way he would let her go. He could not for he loved her. His resolve was firm, however, and he would not allow his love to get in the way of his mission. She would do as she was told, and he would clear this mess from their lives. There would be no more watchfulness and waiting. He was going to make things happen. He needed a plan, and he needed Willis to help him with that plan.

  But Willis could not help. He lay unresponsive in the next room. De Toeni could help, but Oliver was not as in tune with how he liked to do things. It seemed whoever was pulling the strings was an expert and knew the inhabitants of this castle well. He had to find a way to keep her protected and draw the danger out once and for all.

  She hat
ed him now, and he would have to live with that. The love he felt would die in time, and he would be free of his pain. He would keep her here, though, and keep her safe while he waited to be free of his love.

  "Aye," he whispered, "'tis how it has to be."

  Chapter Twenty-One

  The next day, Gemma paced from wall to wall within the nursery. She had slept there and stayed throughout the morning. Her first thoughts were to go to the stables or out to the garden to say goodbye to the things she loved the most, but the rain had started before dawn and it had continued relentlessly all morning. Tiny rivers of water appeared along the dirt paths, and the winds blew so hard the leaves on the trees in the orchard were breaking off and flying about the outer bailey.

  The dinner horn had sounded. She sent Isabel and Hesse to eat but refused to join them. She had yet to tell her little sister they would be leaving. Hesse tried to keep Isabel busy so Gemma could get her items packed in a trunk. They would leave the next morning at first light. She had wanted to leave this day, but there was too much to do and the rains were not letting up.

  She would not tell Isabel until it was time to go. Her plan was to have Oliver and some of her father's men escort them to Wales, sending a note back to her father stating he could join them when he was well enough. She had not yet had a chance to talk to Oliver, but she would do that as soon as he was free.

  Leaving her father would be hard, for he was still not himself physically. No matter her feelings at the moment, she knew Nicholas would be kind. He might try to come after her, but she would be safe in Wales. She doubted Henry would care enough to enter Wales to retrieve her or let Nicholas do it as long as Blackstone was secure. He had yet to try to stop her, so she assumed she would leave without argument from him.

  It would be different, but she would make a new life there for herself, Isabel, and her babe. She harbored guilt for a moment, knowing she meant to leave without telling Nicholas of the pregnancy. He would be angry if he knew, and he would never let her go. It was better this way for everyone.

  She sat down on Hesse's cot for a moment and put her hand on her stomach. The baby was new, but she loved it already. She had dreamed of babes upon her lap, living with Nicholas, and growing old within the walls of Blackstone. Now she would raise the babe on her own, and they would find a way to be happy. She had only met her uncle once, but he was much like her mother and she knew he would welcome them there.

  Her thoughts were interrupted by a sound behind her. For a moment she assumed she was hearing things, but another sound got her full attention. Before she could turn around, a gloved hand clamped down on her mouth, and an arm snaked around her waist. She was pulled from the cot and was being carried toward the back of the nursery.

  She tried to scream, but the hand was tight against her mouth. The sounds that escaped were weak. She kicked and twisted, but the arm around her stayed firm. Her mind raced, but she was too terrified to fight back effectively. Was Nicholas doing this to stop her from leaving?

  The person holding her was breathing heavily. He stopped, and she stared ahead with her eyes wide open. She could not see who it was, but she knew it was not her husband. She kicked her legs again, aiming for a stool. Her toe caught it under the seat. It tipped and fell softly up against a tapestry on the wall, making almost no noise.

  "Be still!" a voice said in her ear. "I shall knock you out if you do not."

  The voice was not familiar to her. It was not Phillip coming back for her, as she had often feared in her nightmares. This was someone else. She heard a creak, and she realized this person knew of the tunnel. This one led from the nursery to the orchard and then into the other which went under the walls. This man was taking her and going through the secret passageways.

  Terror exploded within her, and she began to struggle anew. She knew she must not let him get her into the dark, forgotten passageway. No one would hear her scream in there.

  "If you do not hold still, I will have that brat of a sister of yours hurt. You would not want that to happen, would you?"

  Panic struck as she remembered Isabel was in the great hall. This man could do whatever he wanted to her, but she must leave her sister safe. She stopped struggling and allowed the man to drag her into the tunnel. The tapestry hiding the panel shifted, and he pushed it back as they passed. He carefully moved the sliding door shut, and they were encased in darkness.

  He dropped her to her feet and something poked her in the back. "That is my dagger, girl. Should you do anything stupid, I will stab you." He deftly tied a gag around her head and urged her through the tunnel.

  "Watch your step," he said with a harsh chuckle. "There are many pitfalls ahead. Being left bound and gagged in here would be no way for a lady to die."

  Gemma did not know what else to do but to follow directions. She put her arms out to feel around her. The stones were cold, wet, and slimy. She tried not to think about what she might encounter. For all she knew, this tunnel had not been used for years. It would have made her trips to see Nicholas long ago much easier, but she hated it so much she took the chance of going outside instead. The man behind her knew of it too, but even she had only used it once, just to see where it went. That was years ago, and she knew of no other using it. How did he know?

  "Faster," he said, as he pushed her shoulder with a hard hand. "We do not have time. If you want to live, you will move."

  She obeyed. She moved as quickly as she could. The gag around her mouth made it hard for her to breath, and the air in the tunnel was thick. Her feet hit things as she went, and she refused to let her imagination form an image of what those things were. She was terrified enough, and she did not want to fall or anger the man behind her. Isabel would be safe if she obeyed.

  The man moved her through and out the other side, under cover of the orchard. He pushed her through the tunnel running along the curtain wall and then commanded she go into the other passageway that would take them away from the castle and away from safety.

  Gemma hesitated, and he pressed the dagger into her back. "Move, girl," he snapped. "You and I both know you know this tunnel well. Be on with it!"

  She started counting the steps to get through the tunnel, just like she had all those years past when she would meet Nicholas. The passage that once took her to him was now taking her from him.

  They came out into the woods. The rain was harder now and felt like tiny pebbles beating against her skin. The wind was strong but not steady. Each gust tried to knock her from her feet. She was cold and shivering. The rain soaked her to the skin within seconds. The man behind her pushed her away from the castle, deeper into the woods. She stumbled, her kirtle now heavy and clinging to her legs, tripping her as she went.

  As the wind howled, she tripped on a rock. She tried to catch herself, but she landed hard in the mud. The man behind her picked her up by her hair and pushed her forwards. She cringed from the pain but did not cry.

  Many of them the same men she had encountered in the woods before were waiting for them. She knew instantly the Bigods were involved, but somehow she did not think the man behind her was a simple soldier. Something in her told her she knew this man. His language was that of the educated, which puzzled her more. Without seeing him, she could not know for sure. She was hoisted head first over a horse. Water was now dripping around her neck and soaking the gag in her mouth. She struggled but to no avail.

  The ride through the woods and around to the river crossing was brutal. She was bounced and jolted. Once the party crossed the rising river, she glanced back, fearing no one else could cross if the heavy rains continued. She would be gone, and no one would find her. Even if they suspected the Bigods, they would not get across the river today.

  She was pulled into a sitting position for the rest of the trip. The man behind her remained a mystery. She thought to throw herself from the horse, but she knew that was futile and it might harm the babe. She had no horse of her own, and she would not get far in the blinding rain. Her only ch
oice was to see this out. Escape would have to come later.

  Her heart sank as the group followed the hedgerow of a large field. They were close to Renoir now, and she would be defenseless against whatever the Bigods had in mind for her. Nicholas would not care she was gone. She had told him she was leaving anyway, and he might think she left early. If he tried to follow her, he might go the wrong way toward Wales.

  Foolishly she had told him of her love. She had not meant to do it, but it had come out. He had acted as if she had not said it. It had meant nothing to him. Something inside her had hoped he had begun to love her as she had loved him, but it was not to be. She felt he simply did not care. He had tried to tell her she could not go, but he spoke of duty and safety, not of love.

  With a jolt, she was shoved off the destrier and landed on the soggy grass near the front of the castle. All of the men dismounted and led their horses in. Gemma was thrown over the shoulder of the largest of the men, and he carried her in through the gate. She studied the men behind her, but none of them appeared familiar.

  She was carried in, and the group marched toward a tower. They were taking her to a locked room. She was grateful to get out of the rain and hoped a locked door would keep everyone out, even though it was meant to keep her in. Whatever Hugh had in mind would be life altering.

  Tears stung her eyes and rolled down her cheeks as she was shoved into a room within the tower. The door locked behind her, and she was left alone. It was a dark room with just a few arrow loops for light. The rain was still heavy and the skies dark, leaving little light to come in through the slits. She still had a gag on her mouth, but her hands were free.