by Lexie X
Surging with lust, Isabella smiled, sped up the thrust of her fingers and the pressure of her tongue, and kept her eyes locked on those warming brown eyes above. The rift between them seemed to close as their bodies began moving to the same rhythm. Finally relaxing, Piper moaned softly and leaned back on her hands.
Excited by the reconnection of their bond and by the powerful realness of the attraction she felt, Isabella put all her weight on one arm so that she could thrust her fingers in and out harder. The more she felt her girlfriend's body responding to her licking and fingering, the more excited she grew. The adrenaline surging through her seemed to set her aflame, bringing heated waves of pleasure in greater intensity.
The overstimulation had her breathing raggedly even as more and more saliva and juices dripped from her open mouth and working tongue, but she could only push her own energy higher.
"Oh, wow," Piper breathed, bucking against her face in time with the thrusting fingers inside her.
Urged on, and feeling an energy similar to that incredible sixty-nine they'd shared during the summer, Isabella slipped a third finger inside those tight silken walls and began a deeper harder rhythm with her thrusts. The tight clenching she felt against her fingers brought out a similar clenching inside her own body, and she felt light brushes of a possibly attainable orgasm. Amazed that she truly was feeling it, she wondered how Piper had learned to take that feeling and focus it into an actual release. The pleasure slipped close, teasing her awareness, but she could never quite grab hold of it. Still, it stoked her fires, and she put her whole body into moving against her girlfriend's sex with her fingers and tongue.
Above her, Piper squealed, and her legs clenched together tightly.
Knowing what that meant, Isabella kept up her efforts at exactly the same pace, ignoring the painful tiredness in her tongue. Something inside her wanted it, needed it, more than ever before. She physically needed to feel her girlfriend orgasm.
Falling backward and writhing around, Piper covered her own mouth to keep from screaming. Breathing hard through her nose, she rolled and tensed powerfully.
A single hand came down and clutched her hair tightly, but Isabella kept going, eager to drink in the beauty of her girlfriend's orgasm as long as possible. This definitely had to be some of what Piper always felt, she knew; inside her own body, she felt frustratingly high swells of pleasure that were just barely too wide and unfocused to come together. With wetness dripping down her chin and hand, she rode her girlfriend's sex until the thighs on either side of her head began to slow.
Finally calming and then relaxing to the floor, Piper immediately pulled at her.
Slipping her fingers out of warm silk, Isabella climbed forward and embraced her girlfriend tightly. Piper clutched at her powerfully, even scratching her shoulders with the sheer intensity of her grip. Catching her breath over the course of a minute, her skin flushed red, she said nothing.
Holding her tight, Isabella stroked her hair and waited, traces of that energy still coursing through her. It'd taken quite a bit to touch the barest sliver of that other reality—the one in which Piper lived—but she felt like she understood her girlfriend a little better now. With attraction to a girl like that, it was small wonder she was a lesbian, and, if she felt that way from pleasuring a girl and experiencing making another girl orgasm, it was small wonder she loved doing it so much.
Going over the last few minutes in her head, Isabella wondered at the actual physical pleasure she'd felt while so enamored. If she could train herself the way Piper had, if she could learn to control that feeling and learn to actually get off physically from the sheer act of pleasuring a girl, she knew that would be it. She'd be lost to that other world. Christ, she'd never spend time doing anything else!
It was obvious now why Piper actually needed and craved servicing girls. That was sex for her! Just like masturbation was never quite as satisfying as the real thing, Piper had always grown antsy without her fix.
Finally releasing her close grip and relaxing, the brunette sighed and then kissed away the juices around her mouth. Her eyes remained a mix of passionate and guarded. "You know I love you, right?" she said softly, her tone careful.
Isabella nodded, worried.
"I just need some time," Piper explained. "We're alright, I promise. I just need some time to…" She searched for the right words.
"It's alright," she found herself saying in a positive tone, secretly despairing. "I understand. I went too far last night."
"You did. But that's gonna happen sometimes between us." The brunette paused. "Do you need to talk about your parents' divorce?"
"No, it's fine," she lied, her heart sinking.
"Alright." Piper sat up and began pulling her pants back on.
Isabella maintained her mask for her girlfriend's sake. They'd reconnected so strongly for a few minutes, at least physically, but Piper had never been distant and quiet like this after fooling around together. Nodding again, she got up and let her girlfriend get back to studying, more confused and hurt than before.
"Oh, I'm sorry," Maisy said, almost bumping into her in the hallway.
Reflexively, Isabella wiped her own chin quickly, fearful that there were still glistening juices around her mouth. "Oh, hey."
Maisy looked at her oddly for a moment, but then pushed past into her room.
Her mental gears turning, Isabella wondered if she should sneak into the black-haired girl's room when she was out and check her laptop. If there was lesbian porn in her browser history, then Maisy obviously suspected and was already intrigued, so she'd be an easy target for her two seduction-minded roommates.
She shook her head. This wasn't a good time time, she told herself. And how much of her life had changed drastically already from playing games with just one roommate? She already had a disappointed and hurt girlfriend because of all that. Feeling bad about her dark side for the first time in nearly a year, she blinked to resist a few tears and headed back to her own room.
***
Chapter 9
That night she sat at the bar quietly sipping some dark brown lager she'd never heard of before. Her friends chatted and laughed beside her, taking up a good portion of the nearby space. Beyond them, crowds of college kids talked, drank, and mingled. Only a few were in costume; it wasn't Halloween, not quite yet.
One of her friends asked, "Everything alright?"
Another glanced over. "How are things with Piper?"
"I'm fine," she lied again. It was getting harder and harder to maintain her masks. It seemed the longer she was with Piper, the more foolish it seemed to keep such a massive ball of pain, desires, and anger hidden inside herself. None of her friends knew her as anything but a graceful and beautiful paragon of strong femininity. That was the character she'd presented to them all without fail. What would they think of her if they knew she was really sadistic, domineering, and sexually depraved? And not only that, she enjoyed being wicked. She didn't want to lose their friendship; not in the least because they were all gorgeous themselves and served as social capital for her to accomplish the outgoing life she wanted.
She stopped drinking mid-sip. Was she just using them, too? There were so many things she was starting to dislike about herself. Piper had woken her up to the possibility of a better life, but now she was absent. What if her girlfriend decided dealing with her dark side wasn't worth it anymore? She felt immediately cold, and put down her glass. A strange hollowness seemed to directly hurt her stomach.
Feeling a bit floaty, she watched herself suddenly perk up and take a walk to the bathroom. She didn't have to go, but what she'd really wanted was the attention. Guys looked her way as she walked by, and some even said something. She took that energy and pulled it inward, using it to fight that dark hollowness.
Once in the bathroom and feeling a bit better, she fixed her hair in the mirror. Would it be wrong to flirt with some guys tonight? She loved the attention, and it made her feel whole and powerful inside. For t
he past year, she'd been a flirtatious minx just as she'd always been. Why did that feel so strange now that Piper had been hurt by her actions? When her girlfriend had loved every single thing she'd ever done, it had been carte blanche to be herself; to give in to all her darkest urges without restraint.
And never had she given in to those urges more than the last few months by pushing Piper away, humiliating her, and torturing her to feel better about the horrendous hole her father had torn in her heart. She put her face in her hands. She simply couldn't understand how he could just disappear like that. He'd always been cold and distant, but there had been rare instances in her life when it had seemed like he cared. Those moments meant nothing now, not since he'd simply left and cut off contact. She must have been mistaken. His daughters must have really meant nothing to him.
Still floating around her own head to avoid the pain in her body, she watched herself leave the bathroom, pick a table, and sit down among a crowd of surprised guys. They immediately fell under her spell. She introduced herself, led the conversation, and had every one of them laughing and studying her with unabashed interest. It was easy because they all wanted her, and that attention became her fuel. Part of her hated the way Piper's distance made her feel. Part of her nursed anger at this whole lesbian thing, and it kept whispering to her that she should call the whole ridiculous thing off and reward herself by taking home one of these guys.
Although she was smiling and outwardly having a good time, she felt torn inside, and on the verge of screaming or puking at any moment. Without warning, she suddenly said goodbye to the guys, stood, and returned to the bar near her friends. That part was effortless—her entire life, she'd held her inner darkness in check with strict rules, and one of those rules was no cheating. Still, she hated that part of her had wanted those things. Those wants weren't even real, she knew. As pathetic as it was, she just wanted attention and physicality to fill that dark hole inside her heart.
"Why do I do this to myself?" she asked her next beer.
The light golden ale didn't respond.
She frowned. The next urge her inner darkness had in mind: getting absolutely shit-faced. The drunker she got, the less she felt that hollow cold need and the more she could justify going home and forcing Piper to do things.
Piper usually loved that—but not tonight. She wouldn't like it tonight.
Looking past her group of friends, she could still see many male eyes on her. They pissed her off now for some reason, but wasn't that why she always dressed up so much? Killer skirts, high heels, sexy makeup, hair done to perfection; it was that blonde hair that she considered her most valuable asset. Natural, long, and perfectly done, it always got her the attention she needed so desperately—but none of it would change the fact that her mom was a crazy drunk and her dad had dropped them all faster than a bag of hot garbage. Her sister, too, would be on that list, if Piper hadn't helped heal that relationship.
It always came back to Piper.
"I gotta go," she abruptly told her friends. They looked at her in surprise, but she didn't elaborate. Instead, she closed her tab and hurried out of the bar as fast as possible.
It took until the afternoon the next day before she could complete her plan. In the meantime, she took care of her studies, intent on keeping her good grades despite the drama of the moment. Once there, she hesitated outside for an hour before finally heading inside and going through with it.
After it was done, she felt permanently filled with adrenaline. A surreal haze hovered around her, but she repeatedly told herself it had been the right thing to do. Reaching the apartment with more tension than relief, she steeled herself and headed inside.
Fortunately, nobody was out in the living room. She headed across for the back hallway and knocked on her girlfriend's door. A moment later, Piper answered the door while mid-conversation on her phone. She froze—and then hung up the phone, her eyes wide. "What did you do?"
Beset by nervousness, Isabella asked, "Can I come in?"
Her girlfriend nodded, and they both sat on the bed.
In the closet door mirrors, she could finally see herself outside the context of the salon. Her long blonde locks were gone, pared down to a very short pixie cut. The sleek and gorgeous hair that had been her most prized asset was gone.
Piper touched her short hair with compassion and amazement. "What did you do?"
"I cut it all off," she replied, her eyes misting.
Piper shook her head gently, her tone caring. "Why?"
She'd thought about what to say for hours, but, in the stress of such an intense moment, she forgot her speech and had to stumble through feelings she wasn't used to expressing so honestly. "I'll always be attracted to men," she started off, being as honest as her terrified heart would allow. "But I'm also attracted to you. And I've been desperately seeking male attention my whole life."
"Because your dad ignored you so much?" Piper asked quietly.
She nodded and screwed up her cheeks, squeezing out a few tears. "I like the attention. It makes me feel powerful and in control. It makes me feel… worth something." She sniffled. "But, you know what? I might like that, but I love you. I like all that, but you make me feel worth so much more. You fill that hole in me just by being you. And the thought of life without you is too much to bear."
Her cute brunette girlfriend flashed a dazzlingly warm and genuine smile, clearly happier than she'd been in months. "You cut off your hair for me?"
She nodded, painfully aware of the lightness and freedom of her head. The bouncy weight she'd been used to was gone, and she felt very exposed. "I'll always be from both worlds," she forced out, remembering some of what she'd wanted to say. "But I want to live in yours."
Piper gripped her close, her eyes bright and excited. "I appreciate the sentiment, I do," she laughed. "But you're still absolutely gorgeous. You're still going to get hit on by guys like crazy."
"It's a symbolic thing," she choked out, laughing, crying, and sighing with amazed relief all at the same time.
"I know," her girlfriend said softly. "I know." She looked over at her dresser for several seconds as if something important lay within.
Isabella had a sudden idea. "Hey Maisy?" she yelled at the closet, beyond which lay the black-haired girl's room.
"Yeah?" came the mildly loud but clearly audible reply.
"Piper and I are dating," she yelled, heart pounding. "Thought you should know."
"No shit? These walls are like, paper thin. I'm pretty sure our neighbor Sheenan can hear everything from here, too."
Beside her, Piper gaped and covered her mouth.
Isabella, too, couldn't help but feel a little embarrassed. All this time, had Maisy been hearing their loud and ridiculous sexual escapades?
Her mildly loud words came again. "Don't worry, I haven't said anything to Savannah. I don't think she's the type to handle that sort of thing well."
Piper jumped up, whispered, "Oh my god," and darted out to her roommate's bedroom.
Breathing deeply to try to relax, Isabella just sat in place and listened to her two roommates hashing out the details of the situation. So, she'd cut her hair off and chosen to eschew male attention for the indefinite future. Judging by her face, Piper had absolutely loved the gesture, and the rift between them might have been healed. Why, then, did thinking about her father's brutal departure still bother her? Half of her wanted to cry with happiness and the other half wanted to cry from despair. Instead, she just breathed in and out, barely managing her inner chaos.
Piper returned shortly, her eyes bright. "Ok. You're going to switch rooms with Maisy."
She looked up, surprised. "Really?"
"Yeah. She doesn't care what we do with our private lives, but it annoys her to have to hear it all the time."
"Oh, jeez."
"Yeah, that's what I said, too. So if you and her switch, even though it's a lot of work, well, then we'll have the living room and kitchen between us and them. If you're alright wi
th it, that is."
She nodded absently, not quite believing the fortunate turn of events. "Absolutely. That's awesome."
Piper came and sat beside her to rub her back with one hand. "I can't even tell you how much this means to me," she said, looking up at her now-short hair.
She gave a wan smile. "Good. And I want you to know how sorry I am for… what I did."
Bringing that hand around and gently caressing her cheek, Piper returned her smile. "I knew we'd be alright. You always come through."
At that, she frowned humorously. "I always come through?"
"You do."
"No, you're the one that always comes through," she insisted. "You've changed my whole life. You're always there, you care endlessly, and you always break down my barriers and—"
Piper cut her off with a warm kiss.
Elated to have their bond back, Isabella sank into that kiss with relieved abandon, letting her tongue dance with her girlfriend's for a long moment.
Pulling back with a mischievous smile, her girlfriend studied her face. "I need you to come through one more time." Her words dropped to a whisper. "Since Maisy's right there… where can we have sex right now?"
"Right now?" she asked, her inner chaos shrinking in favor of sudden warmth.
Piper purposely drew out her whispered elaboration. "I want you to put me on my knees…"
Her dark side immediately summoned, Isabella sat taller and regarded the thin, cute, and utterly willing girl before her. High from their reconciliation, she believed her girlfriend's submissive need had never been more alluring. But where to go? Savannah was probably in her room this time of day, so anywhere in the apartment would be heard by somebody.
Quickly, she grabbed Piper and pulled her along. It was cold outside, but they didn't have far to go. They moved along the balcony, down the passage to the other side, and then further down toward three doors at a corner. At the second one, she knocked loudly.
