Gamer Girl

by Carmen Willow

  Eamon stared at her a moment and then laughed, hard.

  “What’s so funny?” Sarah demanded.

  “You are. Who knew that in addition to being bright, articulate and a cunning strategist, you were also an actress and quick change artist? I certainly didn’t.”

  “Are you saying I’m a phony?” Sarah asked. His remark hurt a little.

  “No, that isn’t what I’m saying,” Eamon replied, “although you are entirely too thin-skinned. There’s no single word for it, so let me explain.” Eamon paused a moment to gather his thoughts. He’d been puzzling over Sarah for three days now. Maybe saying it out loud would help him sort it out. “I know you’re not acting. You are always “you,” Sarah. You don’t pretend to be someone or something you’re not, that isn’t it. But...it’s like…well, you see someone else’s world and rather than just observe it, you do your best to enter into that world with them. If clothes make the difference, then you dress the part. If it’s manner, behavior, then you behave as you are expected to behave.” Eamon’s eyebrows met as he continued to puzzle it out. “It’s like you have the words When in Rome do as the Romans do, inscribed in your soul somewhere.”

  “You think I am an empty shell?” Sarah asked.

  “No! No. Sarah, there’s that thin skin again. Sit there for a moment and think about who you are. Don’t tell me about your occupation; don’t tell me about your family. Tell me who you are; tell me what it is that so enthralls you that you lose time when you are pursuing that thing.”Sarah started to make a sharp retort but Eamon put a hand on her arm and said, quietly, “Trust me, Sarah. Just do it.”

  Sarah closed her eyes a moment. There were so many things….Finally she began, “I love to sing. I sing every day. I sing in the car on my way to work. And I want to know things…” Sarah looked at Eamon with eyes that burned with excitement, “I want to know what fuels reality as we know it. Is God really quantum physics, or is God our species’ myth. I want to find God, whatever the nature of that ultimate reality is. I keep searching…I want to know how to weave cloth and why genetics alone doesn’t explain who we are. I know there are other intelligent beings in the universe…there has to be, but I want to know how to reach them, and then I want to know if reaching them is a good idea or if we should just observe. I want to dance all the dances. I want to know how people tick and why they can be so kind and so cruel in the space of an instant. I want to love someone and I want to be loved. I want to know why you can love someone with all your heart and still hurt them deeply…”Sarah stopped. She’d said too much, revealed too much. “Well, I’ve bared my soul. What about you? Who are you, really?”

  “That’s easy. I want freedom. I want to go where I want and do what I want and never be stopped by petty things like lack of money.” Eamon stared past Sarah. “I figured out early that there were two ways to achieve freedom. I could drop out and keep it so simple that nothing could hold me…but that meant not doing right by my family. . The other way takes longer. Work hard, get so rich that you can buy anything and not count the cost. Rich means I can help my brothers and sisters, buy my mom and dad a house and pay off their bills. So, I worked my ass off, graduated high school a year early, graduated college a year early, and all the time, I was building a video game empire in my spare time. I didn’t drink. I didn’t date. By the time I graduated, I had over a million in the bank. I was nineteen and a half.”

  “So your video games? They were just a means to an end?” Sarah couldn’t believe what she was hearing. He didn’t date? But it made a strange kind of sense. Why had he been so driven?

  “No, they’re fun to create. It’s recreation for me and it had the added benefit of paying off big time,” Eamon explained. “If you have to work like a dog, you may as well enjoy the work.”

  “And your family is an obligation?” Sarah asked quietly.

  “Ye—no. I love my family. But I don’t want to be tied—“

  “You want to be free, and love takes away your freedom, so you pay your debt, you make sure your brothers and sisters have a chance, you honor your mom and dad, and you do all that so you can walk away without feeling guilty. But you don’t want to love and you don’t want to be loved.” Sarah said softly.

  Eamon shot her a murderous look as he pushed himself out of his chair and walked swiftly away from her. Sarah knew he was angry, but she’d also seen something else in his face. Eamon was afraid of something. Sarah was stunned. She didn’t think Eamon was afraid of anything. She thought about going after him. Bad idea. Reluctantly, she picked up her tablet once more and began to read.

  Eamon found a bar. He ordered single malt and sucked it down in one gulp, shaking his head to counteract the burn of the liquid fire. The bartender held up the bottle questioningly, but Eamon said, “No, a diet cola please.”

  Damn her! Damn her! How in the hell could she know? He’d spent his entire adult life working acquiring enough money and power to be free; but somehow, there was never enough money, power and fame to make that possible. He’d seen what love did. He’d watched his father spend his whole life working at that modern labor camp called a car line in the name of love. Love trapped you, held you fast, and sucked you down. The question was, how had Sarah seen past all the BS he was handing her to the core of what he meant? How did she get him to say it?

  The single malt mellowed him out and sipping the cola gave him time to think. Finally, he walked back to where Sarah was sitting. She watched him approach, eyes filled with compassion. She looked down at her tablet again.

  “Our flight’s been delayed.” She murmured.

  “Crap!” Eamon hissed. “How long?”

  “Two hours, thunderstorm in Atlanta, I think. Eamon?”

  He turned toward her realizing that it was the first time in a long time she’d used his first name.

  “I am sorry. I’ve run away from my own family. My solution has always been to hide. I’m very good at climbing into my shell and pulling the covers in after so that I don’t have to deal with the fact that I’m such a…disappointment to them all. So I have no right to judge how you choose to cope.” Sarah looked up from her tablet, her eyes filled with regret.

  “You cut a little close to the bone, but I’m over it. Let’s figure out how we’re going to kill another two hours,” Eamon said unwilling to give away how much her apology meant to him.

  In the end, they had time for another meal before they made it out of Chicago and on their way to Kansas City. It was almost ten o’clock when they boarded the plane.

  Sarah took advantage of the pillow and blanket First Class passengers were provided. She turned her light off, stuck her ear buds into her ears and soon, her head was nodding.

  Eamon watched her. She’d start to fall into a deep sleep and then catch herself and a few moments later, she’d be nodding again. Finally, he couldn’t stand it any longer. He put the luxurious arm rest up, took Sarah’s pillow and put it in his lap. “Come on, Sarah,” He told her.

  Sarah started to protest.

  “Just do it!” Eamon hissed.

  Too tired to argue, she lay her head down on the pillow pulled her feet up in the seat, dragged the blanket over her shoulder and was asleep in about thirty seconds.

  Eamon watched her sleep. Their conversation earlier in the day had been painful, but he understood something that he hadn’t before. He knew why Sarah scared the hell out of him. She would be so easy to love. Smart, sweet, and sexy, she was way too tempting. Giving into it, he brushed the hair away from her face. Her skin was smooth and soft under his hand. Her hair was fine, like silk. Eamon realized what he was doing and took his hand away. He put his own ear buds in and tried not to think about how much he enjoyed touching her.

  They didn’t get home until the early hours of the morning. Sarah had left her car in the employees’ garage, so Eamon insisted on having the limo take her home. “I’ll send them around at eleven to pick you up tomorrow. You car will be safe in the employees’ garage until then.�
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  “Okay. That makes sense. Thank you,” Sarah said.

  He had the driver walk Sarah to her door while he watched until she was inside. Then he had the driver take him home.

  Chapter 14

  The limo appeared promptly at eleven o’clock the next morning. Sarah wore her dark grey suit with a pale pink silk shell underneath. Nude stockings and plain black pumps transformed her into the perfect corporate serf.

  When Sarah came into the office, Nicole looked up and said, “So, how did you like your first convention?”

  “Well, let’s see…I managed to give the guys a very good look at my tits, I sold a bunch of company t-shirts, and I gophered my way through the entire convention hall.” Sarah smiled. “It was great.”

  Nicole laughed as well. “I heard about the tit thing. I can guarantee someone will probably think of that theme for your gag gift come Christmas.”

  Sarah shook her head. “I suppose I should have expected that.” She was about to sit down and she remembered something. “Nicole, didn’t you promise to bring me in some of you art work?”

  “I wasn’t sure you meant it. I’ll bring some tomorrow.” Nicole told her. “By the way, I’m sending you my info on the next convention. It’s a real bitch by the way, so I’m also sending some hints and tips, and if you need help just holler. We’ll send twice as many people and half again as much equipment and product.”

  “Thanks Nicole.”

  Sarah sat down and went to work. She set up a meeting time with the Wickerworld team, entered receipts from the trip into the database, checked Eamon’s personal calendar, noted that he had an engagement with Danielle and sent him an email asking if he wanted her to send flowers; finally, she reminded him of an upcoming charity event and a dentist appointment. Sarah was thankful for electronic media because she could do most of her project manager duties via email. So far she rarely had to enter Eamon’s office and deal with him in person. Today was an exception.

  Eamon walked into the office at around twelve thirty. “Miss Adams, please come in immediately,” he said on his way to his own office, “and bring your coffee and notepad.”

  Sarah got her things and followed Eamon into his office. He was dressed in a very expensive dark gray suit, white shirt, school tie and custom made wing tips. If he were a lawyer, he would be dressed for the opening day of a trial or the filing of a huge Chapter 11 bankruptcy. Sarah’s stomach tightened instinctively. He was dressed for battle, or at least what constituted battle in the corporate world. She only hoped he would fill her in before the combat commenced. “Do you want coffee?” She asked.

  “No thanks, I’ll take bottled water.” Eamon had moved to his conference table and was laying out files in some sort of order. Sarah handed him the bottle of water. Eamon cracked it open absently and took a swallow. Then he pointed at the table.

  “You and I are going over to the Rainwhite building in about forty-five minutes. The files on the table belong to some of the employees over there. You and I are going to inform the people represented here that they have a job with Gryphon if they want it. They’ll be given until six o’clock tonight to make a decision.”

  Sarah mentally counted the files on the table. They represented about three fifths of the Rainwhite employees. “What about the others?”

  Eamon met her gaze. “They’re gone. We do that tomorrow. If some of the people turn down our offer today, then we’ll look for replacements among those who will be laid off. Oh, and Sarah? Your Wickerworld people are on this table, but if I don’t like what you have to offer me, then next week, they’re gone as well.” He watched the color drain from Sarah’s face. “Let me remind you that this information is absolutely confidential.”

  Anger flickered in Sarah’s eyes. “Of course I know that,” Sarah spat out.

  “Good,” Eamon replied in his best boss voice.

  Sarah stared down at the files on the table. She mentally allotted fifteen minutes to each file, and as she counted it all up, she saw the plan. This was Monday afternoon. The people who were staying would be told the good news. Tomorrow was Tuesday. Tomorrow was bad news day. Tomorrow, cardboard boxes and security personnel and network administrators would be on hand to make certain that nothing unauthorized went out the door. Sarah was certain that security measures had already been taken with regard to computer files. It explained why people would have to make a decision by six tonight.

  Eamon laid a sheaf of papers down on the table. “Here’s the interview order. Box up those files and we’ll get over to Rainwhite.”

  Sarah put the files in order and boxed them up. Nicole brought in a cart, and Sarah put the banker’s box on it. She followed Eamon down to the garage. It only took a moment to load up and arrive at the Rainwhite building.

  Sarah set up the conference room as Eamon directed.

  “Okay, let’s get started,” Eamon told her.

  Sarah went out onto the floor and brought their first person into the room.

  Eamon stood up. “Hello, I am Eamon Byrne. You must be Janet Blankenship. Please, have a seat.”

  Sarah watched Eamon offer Janet the chance to join the staff at Gryphon if she desired. He gave a quick overview of the benefits and what she could expect from their company.

  “So what do you think?” Eamon asked with a smile. “Would you like to join us?”

  “Yes!” Janet replied, relieved.

  “Good. Report to the main desk tomorrow. They’ll have your packet ready,” Eamon told her. “If you have any questions, get in touch with Sarah. She’ll help you with the answers.”

  “Thanks. Thanks, Mr. Byrne,” Janet said.

  “It’s Eamon. And thank you. We’re glad to have you at Gryphon world.”

  Janet left and Sarah turned to him. “Mr. Byrne, why are you conducting these interviews? Surely you don’t do this regularly?”

  “Sometimes I do, but not as much as I used to. Tomorrow you will be doing this, so I want to be certain you know how I want it done.”

  Sarah’s eyes went wide. “Oh, so you give out the good news today, and I dispense the bad news tomorrow. Is that it?”

  Eamon almost grinned. Sarah could see that he was enjoying this. “Exactly, Miss Adams. Think you can handle it? Or are you going to run away?”

  Sarah looked down at the files and said softly, “I’ll do what’s required, Mr. Byrne. Now, if you are going to stay on schedule, I’d better find the next person on your list.”

  By five o’clock, they’d made it through the files. One person declined immediately, a programmer who’d already found work elsewhere. Eamon was ready with the name of the next programmer on the list, and he was brought in to receive the good news. They returned to Gryphon where a meal was waiting on Eamon’s conference table.

  “I need for you to stay until after six. Let’s see if there’s anyone else who wants to go elsewhere.” Eamon went over to the table and motioned Sarah over as well. “I had Nicole order some sandwiches. You may as well eat while we wait.”

  Sarah picked at a sandwich while they waited. Six o’clock came.

  “You can go home now, Miss Adams. Mr. Ellesworth will meet you at Rainwhite in the morning,” Eamon said.

  Sarah gave a small snort of disgust. Clearly, he didn’t want to participate in the hard part of this business.

  “Do I detect a note of disdain in your demeanor, Miss Adams?” Eamon asked.

  Sarah stood up. “So you aren’t even going to be there tomorrow? I thought you’d show your face at least. It must be nice to order the executions and then have minions execute the punishment.”

  Eamon stood up as well and came around the table. “First of all, Miss Adams, how I run my business is my affair.”

  “Right. I think I’ll go home—”

  “No. You started this, Miss Adams, so you’re going to have to hear what I say. Your last minute attempt to thwart my plans to purchase Rainwhite cost me a million extra dollars, money that would have been used to keep extra staff on a
while longer—”

  “Well—”

  Eamon held up his hand. “Let me finish. I would have kept everyone on awhile longer while I evaluated, but I never would have kept everyone on staff permanently. Rainwhite was in trouble long before I came on the scene. Aaron’s a great game maker, but he’s a lousy businessman. He had another six months tops before his financing was completely gone and the cuts he refused to make earlier would have taken place.”

  “Well then, why didn’t you make a friendly offer to buy him out?” Sarah demanded hotly.

  “I don’t believe you! You assume that I didn’t make a friendly offer? Hell, I made him an offer a year and a half ago, complete with a place for him in my business. Aaron refused, so I left it alone. I knew he had a game coming out. He was gambling on its success. I understood that. But when Wickerworld didn’t do as well as they’d projected, I knew I had to move. I wasn’t the only shark circling in the water you know. There were others salivating over his game engine.” Eamon leaned closer. “Do you really think I’m that much of a bastard?”

  Sarah bit her lips. “I really need to leave—”

  “Not yet.” He put a hand on her arm. “One more moment, and then you can leave.” He pointed to the chair and Sarah sat back down.

  “Martin and I usually do this together,” Eamon told her. “We look at the stats, we look at what we need and we make decisions. Both of us are there to give the good and the bad. Neither of us likes it, but it has to be done. In this case, Miss Adams, you are the person who ran the numbers, looked at the stats and made the decisions. You were there for the good, so, you will give the bad as well. Martin will be there as moral and legal support.” Eamon looked her over and turned away. “I’ve already told Martin that if you can’t handle it, he’s to take over.”

  “May I go now?”

  “Sure.”

  Sarah rose quickly and threw her paper napkin onto the table before she marched out the door. Eamon considered calling her back to clean up the mess, but decided he didn’t want to deal with the drama. He cleaned up himself.