“I’d miss both you girls,” Anthony frowned. “I didn’t realize until just now that we’ve been together for a long time. You guys are my family.”
“Stop, you have to stop.” Zeke sounded very serious. “I really do hate it when she cries.”
Alex gave a small chuckle and hugged Anthony.
“We’d miss you too.” She pulled away. “How is it that you came to be Nadine’s bodyguard?”
The question made us all stop and look at him.
“I don’t know. I was just told to come here, keep her alive.” He shrugged. “I got paid really well for it too.”
“How well?” I asked.
“About three million.” Anthony stepped next to me. “But I gave it back when you started your company.”
He gave me a quick hug. I started crying again. This was ridiculous. Funerals always make people so overly sensitive.
“Great, she’s crying again,” Zeke tossed his hands in the air, shook his head and turned his body in a 180-degree circle. It was kind of entertaining.
“I think I’d miss Alex more than Nadine,” Ivan finally added. His face was pinched taut, his eyes wrinkled.
“What?” Alex asked.
“You, I get to argue with. It’s hard to argue with Nadine, she’s almost always right. I can never win with her. And I’m discovering when she isn’t right, it’s very bad. Things always go haywire when she isn’t right. I don’t know why.” Ivan seemed to consider that for a moment. “Besides, Alex is more fun than Nadine. Alex actually leaves her house once in a while.”
“You’re kidding right?” Alex frowned at him.
“No, you’re also the only one that understands Nadine to any degree. That’s helpful.” Ivan shrugged.
“You’re so weird.” Alex hit him lightly in the arm.
“But we already knew that.” Liam touched my hand. “You all right?”
“Fine. I think we should go get dressed for the funeral though.” I wiped at the tears and headed upstairs.
Zeke followed me into my bedroom. He took a seat on the dresser and watched me move around, gather clothes. I wasn’t bawling anymore, but I was still wiping away the occasional tear.
“Please stop crying,” he said after a few minutes.
“Why?”
“I don’t like it when you cry.”
“So I’ve gathered. But why is it an issue for you?”
“It just seems like the entire world goes slightly off balance when you cry.”
“Huh?” I picked out a nice black dress, with a silk scarf and black hat. No sense looking like I usually did.
“You don’t cry when you’re angry, you don’t cry when you’re in physical pain. So when you cry, I know that it’s something I can’t help you with. It makes everything seem off balance.” He walked over to me, wrapped his arms around me. “You are probably the most important person to me.”
“Zeke,” I stopped. I had no response for that. I had no idea what he was trying to tell me either.
“Don’t you think it’s strange that you always get paired up with either Anthony or myself? Can you remember a job that you didn’t work with one of us? We do this for a reason you know. Anthony and I have discussed it several times. You have a special place in his heart too. You go out of your way to be accommodating. If anyone at the company has a problem, you go out of your way to fix it. I’ve never met anyone like that. You do it for your family too, regardless of how much they drive you crazy. It just amazes me. So when you cry, I want to fix whatever it is that has made you cry. And I can’t. I’ve never felt more helpless before.”
“Zeke, are you telling me that you love me?” I suddenly felt helpless. I still didn’t know what my feelings for him were. How would I react if he said yes?
“Yes, but it isn’t romantic love. At least, not yet. If I stay in this house much longer that could change though. Even your disorganized, bumbling and rambling is appealing.” He put his face on the top of my head. “Yes, it very well could change.”
“I don’t know what to say to that.” I responded. Sometimes, honesty really is the best policy.
“I don’t expect you to say anything, just please stop crying.” He gently ran his fingers through my hair, once, then stepped away from me.
“Funerals always make me cry.” I told him softly.
“Imagine that.” He gave a wry smile. “And I’m not telling your mother. You’re stuck with that task. However, since it appears we will be getting married, I suggest a first date.”
Changing the subject helped dry up the tears.
“A date?”
“Yes, a date? Do you remember what those are? You, me, dinner, movie, maybe some heavy petting afterwards.” He smiled at me.
“I know what a date is,” I pushed him gently. The tears had dried up, for the moment. However, this new subject wasn’t much better.
“Good, then I won’t have to explain that. So, what do you say?”
“To a date? With you?” I said it slowly, more to myself than him.
“You don’t have to say it like it’s the worst thing you’ve ever heard. If you’d been on a date in the past eleven years, I’d be offended by the inflection in your voice.”
“Sorry, it’s not you.” I sighed at him. “A date? You want to go on a date with me?”
“Yes, Nadine, I want to go on a date, with you.”
“Uh, well, I don’t know what to say to that.”
“You’re beginning to say that often. Does your brain just stop functioning once in a while?” He moved back into me.
“No heavy petting.”
“Fine, no heavy petting. We’ll leave that for a second date.” He closed those last couple of inches. His fingers tangled in my hair as he pulled me into him. The kiss wasn’t chaste this time. His tongue explored my mouth for several seconds and just when I was starting to get into it, he pulled away. Damn!
“Fine, a date and maybe some heavy petting.” I kept my eyes closed.
“Then you can tell your mother we aren’t getting married.”
“We’ve had this argument. Hope you like chocolate cake, cause that’s what we’re having at the reception.”
“You’re more like her than you think. It’s very hard to tell you no.” He handed me a pair of black dress boots. “Wear these.”
I went into the bathroom, showered, changed and met up with everyone in the living room. Most of my shower had been cold, because someone else had decided to shower at the same time in the downstairs bathroom. Life was just full of fun.
Chapter Twenty-Three
We took two cars to the cemetery. Alex, Sebastian, Anthony, Zeke and myself in the Hummer. My brothers had looked like clowns climbing into Alex’s car. It was a black Camaro, cool car, but my brothers were just too big for it.
The ceremony had been fitting. I had huddled into Zeke and Vladik during it, so others wouldn’t notice that I was bawling my head off. Several times I had noticed Alex doing the same thing with Sebastian and Liam.
At the grave side, my employees huddled together. Standing too close to allow personal space. The agents, the staff, their families, all clung to each other. Each of them thinking that it could have been them or their loved one. They stood sentinel to the sister and her husband. Close, but not invading.
The entire group seemed to be fighting tears, some were winning, some were not. It was like every other funeral I had ever been to and I hated it. It made me angry to bury one of my agents, one of my own. We worked hard to maintain a familial atmosphere, but it meant we suffered when we lost one. His family, the company, everyone there was suffering his loss together.
“Nadine?” Thomas’s sister walked over to me. The coffin had been lowered, they were just waiting on us to leave, to cover him with dirt.
“Yes,” I said quietly.
“Thank you for doing all of this.” Tears sprung into her eyes.
“Don’t thank me,” I shook my head, feeling my own eyes burn. “It was the l
east we could do.”
“Most companies,” her voice choked up, breaking as the tears ran down her cheeks.
“Most companies wouldn’t do all this for an employee.” She whispered.
“He was never just an employee, he was a friend to all of us.” As I watched her husband pulled her into him. She pulled away, taking my hand.
“We were cleaning out Thomas’s house yesterday and found a picture,” she stopped, tried to compose herself then continued. “We found a picture from the company picnic last year. It has all of you in it. We’d like for you to have it.”
She produced the picture from her purse and handed it to me. I took it from her, looked at it, rubbed my fingers down his body.
“Thank you,” I responded, refusing to look up at her.
When she hugged me it took me by surprise. I stood motionless for a moment, then wrapped my arms around her. The tears fell. We stood hugging for several minutes. Finally, she pulled away, wiped her tears and left. I watched her walk away.
“Nadine?” Zeke whispered as Thomas’s family disappeared.
I turned to look at him, unable to find my voice. He took me into his arms, cradling me. The guilt, the anger and the pain made my chest want to explode. Anthony and Alex joined us. I was sandwiched in between them. It felt good to be surrounded by their warmth, by their care. Tears fell on my head. One of them was crying or maybe all of them. But today that was just fine, the four of us stood together, and cried.
Epilogue
Things have finally started to settle down. I’m not receiving nearly as many death threats. However, my lieutenants have decided to make me stay out of the field and in the office for the month of October. I’m pretty sure that I’m going to lose my mind out of boredom. Lucy is letting me bring in books to read, so far, I’ve read six and it’s only Wednesday. At this rate, I’ll be out of reading material by the end of the month. I’m going to have to do a lot of book shopping.
Alex surprised me with a gift this week. She bought tickets to see KMFDM. They come to Lawrence, Kansas next week. I’m really excited about that. It will be completely awesome.
Vladik, Liam and Devlin are still at my house. Vladik really did quit his job. Said he was tired of all the secrets. He still can’t tell me what he used to do, but that’s ok. I’ve decided I’m not really all that curious about it. He is working for Alex temporarily. Alex says he’s doing great, really has a clue. I’m convinced he was once a spy or something.
Work is busy. The publicity paid off in more ways than can be imagined. We’re so busy that I’m interviewing for two new positions. We are taking them on a trial basis, if we stay this busy and they work out then we’ll hire them full time.
So far, I’ve managed to go a week without anyone trying to kill, maim, or kidnap me. I think this is probably a good sign. I didn’t exactly follow Anthony’s warning about dropping the murder investigation. Turned out to be someone the husband knew. The sniper killed the brother thinking that Amanda would then return to KC with the money. Alex and I kind of had some fun once we figured out who it was. I took what Zeke had said earlier and put it to use.
We typed a confession note, made the sniper sign it, then pinned it to his chest. We dropped him off at the unloading dock of a police station. And I really do mean dropped him off. Alex slowed the Hummer down to two miles an hour and I gently pushed him out the back. We decided to include Anthony in our fun too. While we did this, Anthony made an anonymous call to the police station. The cops were outside before we had even exited the street. If they wanted to come after us, they could have, but they didn’t. The sniper suffered some bumps and bruises, but I can live with that. The police still haven’t investigated the drop off. Guess they have other, more important things to deal with.
Now, all three of them are sitting in jail, awaiting trial. Should be interesting to watch. Anthony’s anger was lessened by involving him. But he’s still kind of pissed. Every once in a while he’ll mumble something about me having a death wish. I’m not sure if he’s talking about other people killing me or him. I’m going to pretend that it’s other people.
Which brings me back to him protecting me. I asked mom, she changed the subject by asking about the color of my wedding dress. It was pretty effective. I had a panic attack and stopped thinking about Anthony for the rest of the day. I’ve asked my brothers, they brush me off. So I guess I’m just not going to know for a while longer. I guess everyone needs some mystery to them. Having said that, I’d still like to know, why me?
Penny is pregnant with twins. Yeah, more carpet monsters are just what Ivan needs. Like the family isn’t large enough without him breeding like a rabbit. You’d think my mother would focus in on the idea of becoming a grandmother again. But no, she’s too busy dipping her fingers into my life. Now she’s starting to ask questions like “are we planning a family?” That would be a big fat, no. Kids are so not in my future, ever.
The Curb Jumper was caught and identified. It was a case of mistaken identity. The guy thought I was someone else, an ex-girlfriend from high school. I contacted the ex to let her know that he was trying to kill me… I mean her. When he gets out of prison, she’s going to file a restraining order. Hopefully though, he won’t get out for a very long time, he is facing several counts of assault with a deadly weapon.
See my life is still weird. Everyone still thinks Zeke and I are married. There are perks to this. For starters, we’ve gotten tons of gifts. Funny how having hundreds of relations can be a bonus when the presents start to roll in. Melina, my grandmother, Alex and Katya are all planning my wedding. This is bizarre since Alex knows I’m not married. Zeke and I are debating about whether we will really be married afterwards. My family thinks I’m already married, so they aren’t expecting to see a marriage license, the wedding is just for their benefit. We are also trying to figure out if we are breaking any laws by having a fake wedding. It’s unclear. Trina is looking into it.
Our first date was wonderful. We went to dinner at a Thai restaurant, then a play. Zeke has a weakness for theatre, which is perfect because I do too. There wasn’t much heavy petting afterwards, my brothers live there. Hopefully, by the end of the second date, they’ll have found apartments. I haven’t decided whether I’m really going through with the marriage thing. I’ve tried to tell mom several times, but she just ignores me, then whispers to others that I’m embarrassed because Zeke is Tahitian or black. She’s even mentioned to Zeke a couple of times that she doesn’t know why he would marry me if I’m embarrassed by it. Zeke just smiles and says something stupid like “amazing what love will make you suffer through.”
I’ve thought about this comment and it makes me both happy and frightened. The more time I spend with him, the more I like him. I might even be able to fall in love with him. Scary, huh?
However, there’s always the possibility that Zeke will panic the day of the wedding and flee. I’m not putting much faith in it though. He doesn’t strike me as the type to panic easily… and he seems to be enjoying the wedding planning… which I think is sick and wrong.
Oh and a date has been set. Which just proves how wrong it is. If this continues, I’m getting married on May 4, 2013, in Granddad Chzov’s church. He’s making the church arrangements for me. Everyone seems to think I’m too busy to make plans. That’s just fine by me. I want as little to do with this wedding as possible. Sometimes I wonder if I even have to attend. Maybe they could do the ceremony and things without me. That would be nice.
Alex and Sebastian are still having a fling. I’ve listened to some of the details, but for the most part, I try to tune her out when she talks about it. There are just some things about Sebastian that I am better off not knowing. It’s very difficult to work with him and know intimate details about his sexual preferences.
I don’t think my brothers are actually looking for apartments. They seem to like living with me. I seem to think it sucks, but what do I know? Anyway, they seem happy. They all sleep in bunk bed
s in my spare room, Zeke too. Because I no longer have a library. Or a garage.
Why don’t I have a library or garage anymore? Well, funny thing that. I came home from work last week and found that my library had been emptied, put into boxes and shoved into the garage. I can’t fit either car in the garage now. Instead of building a new house, Zeke decided to add on to the one I have. Carpenters and who knows what, run around my house all day long. Ripping down the outside wall, building new ones, remodeling my kitchen to make it bigger, etc. It’s a real pain in the butt. Worse part is, no one will let me see the plans. They are adding onto my house, but I don’t know what they are adding. Plus, it’s kind of creepy that Zeke decided to remodel without consulting me. I hope our marriage isn’t like this.
About the Author
Hadena James began writing at the age of 8. By the time she graduated high school, she had published a couple of short stories in literary magazines. She completed writing her first novel at 17. Hadena began college as an English major, but quickly changed to a history major. However, she pursued her writing and took several extra classes in creative writing.
College showed her that while she could write short stories, novel writing was truly where her heart lay. She graduated from the University of Missouri with a degree in European History with minors in German and Russian Studies. She currently runs her own business.
After years of rejection letters from large publishing companies and literature clearing houses, Hadena self-published her first novel in September 2012. Her second one was published in November of the same year. In retrospect, she is appreciative of the rejection letters, because they taught her where her writing had weaknesses.
Hadena’s primary literary genre is action/thriller. She currently writes two series, both use the action/thriller as their first genre. “The Brenna Strachan Series” uses fantasy as its secondary genre and the “Dreams & Reality Series” uses murder mystery as its secondary genre. She continues to explore and expand her genre writing and hopes to soon produce an action/thriller with comedy as a secondary genre.
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