by Zoe Matthews
“What are we doing?” she asked.
“I want to show you something,” he smiled at her.
He opened the door to the bedroom and then shut it. Going to the bureau, he opened the top drawer and pulled out the letter, turning it over in his hand before shutting the drawer and handing it to her.
“What’s this?” Megan asked, taking the folded parchment.
“My father wrote individual letters to all of us. That is the letter my father wrote to me. I haven’t read it since the night after I got it back in May in his attorney’s office. So many things in that letter didn’t make sense to me until this afternoon. I want to read it again, and I want you to read it with me.”
“Sheridan, I don’t know what to say,” she told him as he led her towards the edge of the bed and pulled her down to sit beside him.
“You don’t have to say anything. I just want to share this with you. Is that okay?” he looked into her eyes, willing the closeness they’d been sharing these last few days to actually mean as much to her as it had to him.
Megan saw the uncertainty in his eyes and reached a hand up to cup his jaw. “I’m honored that you trust me with whatever’s in this letter. Yes, I’ll read it with you.”
Sheridan clasped her hand to his face and then moved it to his lips, placing a gentle kiss in her palm before dropping her hand and taking back the letter. He leaned down and kissed her tenderly; putting the emotions, he couldn’t quite speak of into the gesture. He slowly unfolded the parchment paper and then smoothed the sheets out, holding it between them so that she could read the words his father had written.
My Dear Sheridan:
Son, you were my first born, and a source of great pride and joy for your mother and I. You, more than my other children would have felt the loss of your mother more severely. You were her little helper, and always wanting to join me in the fields or the barn. I’m sorry I didn’t handle her passing better. She was the love of my life and the other half of my beating heart. After her death, it felt as if part of me had died as well.
The fact that you are now reading this letter means I’ve finally joined her and we are together once again. Please don’t grieve for me. There are things you don’t know, and I hope that when they come to light, and they will, that you won’t feel too poorly about the choices I’ve made.
Please believe me, I’ve given them all very careful thought and I haven’t made any decisions in this life carelessly. I’ve always tried to make sound decisions that I knew didn’t carry any significant risk in carrying them out.
When you first approached me about making changes to the ranch, it scared me. Yes, I can finally admit that. I was scared. You were challenging the way things had been and I worried that if I allowed you to work your magic on the ranch, I would no longer be needed.
I should have let you make some changes and supported you. But I didn’t, and it’s too much water under the bridge now.
As Mr. Anderson has probably already told you, I have come up with a way to repay you and your siblings for the past. I can’t be there to support you, but I believe you will find your siblings will be.
I want you to make the changes you discussed with me. Change the focus of the ranch away from cattle and into a working dude ranch with horses. You will need the talents of your siblings. Allow them the space they need to grow and learn from their mistakes.
Especially when it comes to your brother. Sheridan, remember that he isn’t you. He doesn’t process the world as you do, and challenging the status quo is part of his nature. A part you have suppressed for far too long.
I know that asking your brother and sisters to come home for six months might seem unorthodox, and maybe even unfair by some. But I failed you all as a father by not giving you an appreciation for one another.
Your siblings don’t immediately turn to one another when problems arise. I taught them that independence, but I was wrong. They learned the lesson well, but in doing so, I created six children who acted like they were an only child.
In six months’ time, I believe you will be able to judge whether or not your plans for the ranch are successful. You will have worked side by side with your siblings and I trust that you will make the right decisions in regards to the future direction of the ranch.
The saddest part of my leaving is that I will never get to see the potential in each of you fulfilled. You all have so many gifts to offer each other, and your future loves, but I fear that unless you learn to share your emotions again, you will miss out on that.
I know you shut yourself off several years ago I didn’t pry, and you didn’t offer an explanation. Sheridan, it’s time to let go of the past and move forward with the future.
I hope that one day you will get to experience the joy of being a father. The ups and the downs, the triumphs and the struggles that show up each day, whether you’re ready for them or not.
Having the right partner by your side makes all the difference. I know you think you can go this road alone, but take it from someone who’s been there. It doesn’t make you happy. It doesn’t make you feel fulfilled.
Human connection is what this life all boils down to. Who and how we connect to those around us. How we connect to our family. How we help each other through the good and the bad times.
Sheridan, you are a born manager. You can see the big picture, and you make sound decisions. But don’t let those attributes keep you from experiencing love when it comes knocking. Sometimes you just have to take a leap of faith and trust that your heart isn’t going to get trampled upon.
Love without the possibility of getting hurt isn’t really love. Don’t be afraid to love. Don’t be afraid to reach for your dreams of happily ever after. Those dreams do come true, even for men such as you and I.
And lastly. Don’t be afraid to make the hard choices. I didn’t, and I hope that one day you can forgive me. Be strong, and yet allow your heart to love again. You’ll find it doesn’t make you weak, but it makes you stronger when there are two to share the load.
Love, your father
Chapter 18
“Sheridan, this letter is beautiful. I can tell your father loved you and respected you very much.”
“You can? Funny, while he was alive I don’t think I ever heard him praise me. And yet, he begins his letter that way.”
“I’m no shrink, but I think your father was so damaged by your mother’s death, that he never quite healed. And rather than pour salt into an open wound, he chose to close himself off to anyone and anything that had the potential to hurt him more.”
Sheridan folded the letter back up. “I know what you’re saying is right, but it still hurts.”
He walked over to the bureau and placed the letter back into the drawer. Megan followed him and wrapped her arms around his waist. “It’s supposed to hurt. That’s how you know you’re alive.”
He turned in her arms and hugged her back. “When I first read that letter, so many things didn’t actually make sense. But after learning that he’d crashed his own plane, and experiencing the closeness that has grown between us kids, his letter makes so much more sense.”
Megan looked at him and then added, “But it still doesn’t take away the hurt, does it?”
“No. Sometimes when I think about what he did, I want to scream and yell at him for being such a coward. He didn’t try to fight his disease, nor did he let us know that he was sick.”
“And what would you personally have done if you’d known?” Megan asked.
“I would have insisted he get a second opinion and then we would have visited the best doctors in the country.”
“And that’s probably why he didn’t tell any of you he was sick. Your father sounds like a proud man. A man who by his own words handled his own problems.”
“But he couldn’t handle the cancer eating away at his body.”
“No. He couldn’t. Just like he couldn’t do anything to help bring back your mother.”
Sheridan h
ugged her close again, resting his chin on the crown of her head. “Thank you.”
“For what?”
“For being you. For loving my son and taking such good care of him. For marrying me and coming to Colorado.”
Megan buried her head against his chest. “You don’t have to thank me for those things. I’d do them all over again.”
Sheridan pushed her away from his chest and looked down into her eyes. “So, where do we go from here?”
Megan toyed with the button on his shirt. “What do you mean?”
Sheridan tipped her head up so that he could see her eyes. “You know what I mean. Where do we go? You and I. I like being with you. No, correction. I love being with you. I feel so connected to you and the thought of not being with you makes my heart hurt.”
“I feel the same way. I’d given up finding someone like you. You make every day a little better. When you smile at me across the room. Or I see you rocking William in your arms and whispering sweet nothings in his ear. Sheridan, you’ve stolen my heart.”
“As you have mine. So, I ask the question again. Where do we go from here?”
Megan glanced around the room and then a mischievous light came into her eyes. “How much longer do you think Sadie and Kathy will be able to entertain the kids downstairs?”
“What did you have in mind?” Sheridan asked, liking this playful side of her. His wife. His love.
“Well, we probably don’t have time to completely make things legal, but we could snuggle…”
Sheridan shook his head. “Not good enough. We need some time alone. I have an idea. Pack an overnight bag while I make a phone call.”
Sheridan pulled out his cell phone and called Bridger. When he answered, he wasted no time and got straight to the point. “Bridger, is the first honeymoon cabin ready to go?”
“Sure is. I was up there a few days ago and there’s plenty of firewood stacked on the porch. There’s plenty of propane as well and the water supply is fine.”
“Good,” Sheridan told him with a smile. “Can you grab one of the gators and meet me and Megan at the front door in say, fifteen minutes?”
“Sure. You wanting to go spend a few nights up there?”
“Just one night for now. And we’d like to keep where we’re going quiet until we’re gone. Can you do that?”
“Not a problem. In fact, why don’t you pack up the little man and he can spend the night with Stephanie and I. She’s feeling great and she doesn’t get nearly enough time with the kids.”
“That’s a perfect suggestion. We’ll pack a bag with diapers and such for him and see you outside in a few minutes.” Sheridan hung up the phone and then turned and swept Megan into a hug.
“Mrs. Collingsworth, you and I are going to have a wedding night. And William is going to get a chance to know his Aunt Stephanie and Uncle Bridger. I’ll pack a bag for him. Bridger’s going to meet us out front in a few minutes. We’ll grab William from the kitchen on our way out.”
Megan looked at her husband and felt like laughing. When he kissed her nose and then kissed her soundly on the lips before wandering off with a skip in his step and a whistle upon his lips, she knew that everything was going to work out just fine. They were going to be a real family. Something they had both yearned for and just been too afraid to go after.
Guess it’s a good thing fate doesn’t pay any mind to fear! This Christmas was shaping up to be the best one ever!
The End
Colorado Christmas
Majestic Mountain Ranch Romance Series, Book 7
Written by Zoe Matthews
Copyright © 2015
All rights reserved
No part of this publication may be copied or reproduced in any format, by any means, electronic or otherwise, without prior consent from the copyright owner and publisher of this book.
This is a work of fiction. All characters, names, places and events are the product of the author's imagination and used fictitiously.
TABLE OF CONTENTS
Chapter 1
Chapter 2
Chapter 3
Chapter 4
Chapter 5
Chapter 6
Chapter 7
Chapter 8
Chapter 9
Chapter 10
Chapter 11
Chapter 12
Chapter 13
Chapter 1
Saturday, December 5th…
Snow covered mountains. Pine trees rising silently from the white landscape, their boughs laden with several inches of freshly fallen snow. No wind. The blue sky above clear; the air below crisp and clean.
Sheridan Collingsworth stood at the far edge of the meadow, looking back at the Ranch House and the other buildings that comprised the dude ranch. By his side were his brother and the men who were now part of his extended family, having either already married one of his sisters, or preparing to do so before Christmas arrived.
Spencer, twin brother to Stella and one of the youngest siblings, stood next to him, a serene look upon his face.
Bridger, Logan, Hunter, and Cade were spread out along the fence line as well, different expressions and emotions moving through them as they looked back at the place where their lives had forever changed.
For Bridger, he’d come to the ranch to help modify the existing cabins, and build a new guest lodge and extended stay cabins. When he’d met Stephanie, he’d made the decision to stick around. He watched the tendrils of smoke rise from the three bedroom house at the far edge of the meadow, the house he and Stephanie now occupied, and wondered what the New Year had in store for them.
Stephanie had been diagnosed with Multiple Sclerosis earlier in the summer, and while the new medication regimen seemed to be working well, he was worried about her emotional and physical well-being. All around them, her siblings were either raising their young children, or looking forward to starting a family of their own.
He knew deep down Stephanie longed to be mother, and not just an aunt, but her disease posed unique problems and concerns. The biggest problem was the type of medication and treatments that could be used to control the flare-ups of her disease while they were trying to get pregnant, carrying the baby, and then nursing the child if that option was chosen.
The intense drugs she’d been taking were known to cause serious side effects to unborn children. After being given all of the facts and risk numbers, Stephanie had decided to try a less aggressive regimen while they tried to get pregnant. She’d been in remission for a while now, and Bridger knew how much it meant to her. He’d supported her decision to change her meds, and her decision to keep knowledge of the change from her siblings. This was her life and she and Bridger were the only ones whose opinion mattered.
It had been several weeks now, and while he’d noticed a slight decrease in her energy level and her coordination had remained normal, his greatest fear was that her disease would flare up, and she would have no choice but to go back on the aggressive drugs, eliminating her chance to get pregnant and have a child of her own. His child. A child he wanted just as much as his wife.
Sighing, he looked towards the clear blue sky and offered up a Christmas wish that the New Year would bring a new life and the fulfillment of his wife’s greatest desire.
****
Hunter’s thoughts were firmly fixed on the woman and child currently ensconced in the Ranch House – Sadie and Brooklyn. He thought about the twists and turns his life had taken over the last year. There had been one point where he’d thought he would never walk by himself again. His reckless search for the next adrenaline rush had finally come to roost and he’d been injured.
And yet, that had been the impetus for him to take stock of his life – both his successes and his failures. He’d had it all three years earlier; a loving wife, freedom from his controlling parents, and a baby on the way. It was the latter, which had thrown a monkey wrench into his plans. Sadie had no longer been willing or able to participate in his extreme adventures, and h
e’d tossed her to the side, along with a nice dose of parental coercion. A fact that he later came to regret.
He’d come to Pinedale, Colorado to see her and to become part of his daughter’s life. It was the best decision he’d ever made. He was getting ready to celebrate the first Christmas with Brooklyn, and he was just as excited as she was. He’d been working with Bridger for the last three weeks a few hours a day on a beautiful doll house for his daughter. It would stand as tall as she did, and was modeled after the Ranch House.
Brooklyn loved all things girly: tea parties, dressing up, playing with her dolls, and helping Kathy in the kitchen. Sugar cookies were her new favorite food, and he knew from experience it was the frosting and decorating part of making sugar cookies she loved most. He was still wearing the green and blue stains from yesterday’s cookie baking adventure on his hands and forearms.
He smiled as he thought about her reaction come Christmas morning when she saw the doll house. He’d ordered furniture and other accoutrements for the house from an internet catalog site, which were due to be delivered today. He’d told Sadie to make sure she hid the package when it arrived. Brooklyn was very inquisitive, and more than once, she’d been known to get into things without permission. He didn’t want anything to ruin his surprise to her this year.
****
Logan was determined to enjoy the peace and quiet while he could. He also thought over the changes in his life over the last six months. He had come to the ranch on Sheridan’s invitation to be over training and breeding of the horses. He absolutely loved his job. He felt deep love for his new wife, Sierra, and her two daughters. He had doubled his family and he loved it. Their own home had just been finished a few weeks ago and they were enjoying their time together as a family.
