by Mary Wine
“Ye’re here before sunset…”
He nodded. “Old Maud climbed up onto the wall to give that to me. I think she nearly frightened half me captains to death by appearing at the top of the ladder. She’s a highly respected elder of the clan, and there would have been hell to pay if she’d fallen.”
“Why didn’t she give the chore to another?” Nareen wasn’t really thinking of Maud. She was busy fingering the new chemise, shivering with delight over the idea of not having to put her filthy one back on.
“She was making a point to me.”
Nareen lifted the chemise and put it on. It settled into place, falling to just above her knees. The stitches were even and tiny.
“She was making sure I did nae overlook the fact that I’ve forgotten to see to yer basic needs.” He was gripping the arm of the chair. “Why did nae ye ask for clothing?”
“I… I’ve nae had much time really to think on it. Besides, ye told me there was none.”
He watched her, weighing her response.
“Why are ye looking at me as though ye doubt I am speaking truthfully?” she asked.
The way he remained in the chair set off a warning in her head. The man was rarely still.
“And why are ye sitting still?”
He gave a short bark of laughter and stood up. It felt like the chamber shrank, because he was finished trying to lull her into a sense of calm. “Ye know me too well, Nareen, but I hope ye’ll give me credit for attempting to have a gentle conversation with ye.”
“From ye, it is an effort I cannae overlook.” She pulled the comb through her hair and watched him. “But ye are frustrating me, for I have no idea what is on yer mind.”
“Are ye still intent on leaving? Is that why ye did nae ask for another dress?”
The comb fell from her fingers and clattered onto the floor. “The agreement is until the snow flurries appear.”
He looked at the comb, judging her by her actions instead of her words.
“Is it so difficult to speak yer fears to me?” he asked. “I see something in yer eyes, lass, that ye continue to leave unspoken.”
“Some men would consider it a blessing that their choice of woman did nae badger them with every concern she had.”
He reached out and laid his hand against her cheek. “I’ve told ye I want to wed ye.”
She turned away, nodding, but turned back when she heard him following her.
“That will nae happen until ye resolve what troubles ye.” Determination edged his tone. “So I will ask and ask again until ye tell me. It frustrates me that ye will nae voice yer concern and give me the chance to answer it.”
She drew a deep breath and gathered her courage, for she was acting like a coward by remaining silent.
“Ye’ve also told me ye wish for sons,” Nareen stated clearly.
His eyes narrowed. “And ye said ye like children.”
“Some women do nae conceive, Saer, and ye are nae one to be denied what ye set yer mind to getting. Every moment I have known ye, it has been part of yer quest to have sons. What will happen if I give ye a daughter? As yer father’s bride did?”
Surprise registered in his eyes, and he reached out to cup her cheeks. But she jumped back, earning a dark frown from him.
“Ye are everything to me, Nareen. If ye present me a daughter, I will welcome her.”
He said it easily, so easily that she was tempted to believe.
“And what of no children? Will ye send me back to me brother if fate is truly unkind toward me?”
“Since that is what ye have claimed ye wish to do, why would it matter if I did?”
“It would matter.” She clamped a hand over her lips when she realized the words had slipped out.
His expression suddenly softened; the tension in his body eased. “Ye have affection for me at last, Nareen.”
She looked away, but he cupped her chin and brought her face back toward him. “Do nae try to stem it. I would have ye happy.”
Her lips were dry, so she rolled them in to moisten them. The desire to believe in happiness was stronger than it had ever been since she left Grant land. It almost felt as though it might become bright enough to banish the doubts lurking in the shadows of her mind. “And do ye return me affection?”
He lifted his chin and lowered his hand to hook his fingers around his belt.
His expression became guarded, sending a warning snaking through her. “I will honor yer love, Nareen.”
“But ye do nae intend to return it?” He didn’t want to answer her. She could see the reluctance in his eyes. “Now who has thoughts unspoken?”
“It’s a weakness I cannae afford.” He drew in a deep breath. “I’ll nae repeat me mother’s mistakes.”
She stood silent, unable even to think.
“But it pleases me to know ye have softened toward me.” He nodded again. “Pleases me very much. I understand women need such tender feeling to be content. I wish ye to be so.”
“But nae to experience such things yerself?”
His brow furrowed. “Highlanders do nae follow weak lairds. Now, Gitta is fetching ye a fresh dress to wear to supper. I must make sure she gives Maud cloth in exchange for what was used for that chemise.”
He turned and walked toward the chamber doors. His kilt swayed with his powerful strides, but for once, she wasn’t distracted by his physical prowess.
All she felt was an overwhelming need to collapse. Her knees weakened, and tears stung her eyes. The sound of the door closing behind him was like a cannon shot. She felt it vibrating through her, shattering the contentment she’d woken up with.
She sank down, losing the battle to control her tears as well as her legs. Hot little drops of saltwater left tracks down her cheeks as she swept the chamber with her gaze, seeking any shard left of the comfort she’d decided was there.
She found it, lodged deep in her heart. No matter what she wished, there was a feeling burning there that would not heed her demands. It was hot and made her ache as she heard Saer’s words again.
He’d meant what he said. He would never love her.
And she knew, without a doubt, that she had fallen in love with him.
***
The outer gate wall bells began to ring during supper.
Nareen chided herself for how relieved she was.
Hiding her hurt from everyone took effort, and she knew she wasn’t fooling Saer completely. He knew her too well already. Before she’d taken more than two bites, he was cutting her a sidelong glance.
By the time her meat grew cold because she was only picking at it, he’d reached under the table to squeeze her thigh.
She forced her smile into place and ignored the questioning looks from him.
What was there to say? I love ye, but like so many men, ye believe love to be a weakness? He defied the teaching of the Church when it came to the role a woman must play, but he still fell prey to the notion that love was soft and a form of madness.
Once more, they had much in common, for neither was willing to change for the other.
Perhaps she should wed him and prove she was willing to trust. The idea needled her for what felt like hours as she remained undecided.
Saer stood up, making his way down the aisle, along with many of his men. The Hall hushed as they waited to see who was at their gates. The Comyn had had time to send a raiding party in retribution for the men she and Saer had killed.
She itched to get up, but if she did, everyone would follow her. The Hall was a sanctuary, and it was her duty to make sure the women of the clan stayed there.
No matter the cost for her.
***
“Open yer gate, Saer MacLeod!”
Saer arrived and heard his name being shouted by wh
omever was locked outside.
“Ye’ve got me sister, and I’ve come to thrash ye for it!” Kael Grant swore.
“He has a unique way of trying to entice us to lift the gate,” Baruch remarked.
“Aye,” Saer answered as he waved to the men at the top of the gate towers. They began to turn the huge wheels that wound the chains and lifted the heavy iron gate. It groaned as it rose and revealed Kael Grant and a hundred of his retainers.
Saer frowned. “Did ye come here for a fight?”
Kael rode in and slid off the back of his stallion. His boots had barely hit the dirt before he sent his fist into Saer’s jaw.
Saer stumbled back but righted himself quickly. “Explain yerself, Kael!” he snarled as his men rushed forward and the Grant retainers prepared to fight.
“Ye’ll be the one explaining about how I hear ye brought me sister into yer castle tied around ye!”
Saer wiped blood off his chin and held up his hand. His men didn’t care for the command to stand their ground, but they backed up, grumbling.
“Nareen is settling in well.”
Kael had the same black hair as his sister, but also had black eyes. His chin was covered with several days’ growth of beard, proving he’d wasted no time in making his way to MacLeod land.
“Me damned cousin Ruth claimed much the same thing!” Kael roared.
Saer threw a punch at Kael and sent him stumbling back.
“Ye’ll nae compare me to that bitch.” Saer pulled back, allowing Kael to gain his balance. “I should have choked the life from her when I had the chance. I’m still thinking it’s worth the time to ride down to the lowlands to see it done.”
Kael growled but held himself back. “Why?” he demanded.
“I’ll tell ye, but nae before ye swallow some of yer anger, man,” Saer warned. “Ye knew full well I planned to wed yer sister.”
Kael shook his head. “I agreed to yer suit. Nae to a claiming.” He pointed at Saer. “I’ll beat ye senseless if ye have her locked in a chamber somewhere. I swear I will!”
“She’s been teaching some of me younger lads how to defend themselves against dagger attacks.”
Kael pulled himself up straight, frowning as Saer’s words sank in. “She told ye about that?”
“She proved it when some of the bastard Comyn tried to kill me.”
Kael’s expression tightened again. “What the hell was me sister doing in a precarious position like that?”
Saer drew in a deep breath. “I was nae brought up to be a laird like ye, Kael. I forget that a ride through the woods just might end with me having me throat slit because me neighbor covets me land.”
Kael froze while Saer’s words sank in. A moment later, he let out a crusty chuckle. “Nae so wonderful a life, is it, lad?” He laughed long and loud. “Bet yer mother did nae tell ye about that part of being a laird’s son, now did she?”
“No.”
Kael nodded. “Now about this bringing me sister home tied around ye. Tell me it’s nae true, and I’ll be content.”
A few of his captains cleared their throats. Kael’s eyes widened. “Saer?”
“Come inside, Kael. If ye do nae care for me reasons, ye can thrash me, but our men do nae need to be involved.”
Kael popped his knuckles.
But the crowd around them had begun to return to their supper, allowing him to see Nareen standing in the gate between the inner yard and the outer one. Two MacLeod retainers stood in front of her, refusing to let her go any farther until Saer made a motion with his hand. They moved back, leaving her facing her brother.
She took a step forward but stopped, her teeth set into her lower lip.
Grant and MacLeod alike waited to see what she’d do, the yard going quiet as all eyes turned to her.
***
“Remember, yer actions will lead others no matter if ye want them to or no’. That is what being a laird’s daughter means. Ye must always think of the example ye set. For everyone shall look to ye for the way they should behave.”
She hadn’t heard her father’s words for a long time. It should have been a welcome relief from Ruth’s vicious taunting, but Nareen felt just as controlled.
Her brother was laird in all but name.
Her rage was burning bright at the sight of him, but she could not show it. Saer had made her mistress of the MacLeods, and they would respond to her anger.
Everyone in the yard was waiting for her to greet her brother. To show that Grant and MacLeod might be united through her relationship with Saer.
She’d been raised to expect such an arrangement.
But the last time she’d seen Kael, he’d sent her off to Ruth.
It was done with.
And yet, it wasn’t. For she had yet to face her brother.
“Mistress?”
It was old Maud who spoke, age making her tone crack. The older woman leaned on a cane near the gate, expectation in her eyes. She flicked one time-withered finger toward Kael.
It was a subtle reprimand, but the weight of it was great.
Nareen moved forward, covering the space between Kael and herself. She stopped in front of him and lowered herself.
She could see men nodding with approval, smiles appearing on their faces.
“Welcome, Kael.”
***
Nareen was asleep by the time Saer made it to his chamber. He was no stranger to climbing the stairs halfway through the night. But he’d never felt so relieved when he arrived.
He smelled her delicate scent before he made it past the trestle table. She’d left the doors open again, endearing herself to him because she didn’t fear the night the way so many others did.
But the best part was seeing her in his bed, her chest rising and falling slowly. It was the place he’d prepared for her, every detail planned and checked. The bed built large enough for two, and the sheets made of soft fabric so as not to chafe a woman’s tender skin.
And she was perfect.
MacLeod and Grant were happily drinking together below because she’d known the part to play. There was a reason noblemen arranged their weddings. They needed a woman who could run an estate and perform under the demands of her position.
Nareen had excelled.
He sat down on the side of the bed and slid in beside her. She shifted, and he pulled her close.
Aye, perfect.
He buried his face in her hair, inhaling the scent. It sent a spike of arousal through him and a need to have his skin in contact with hers.
Any way possible.
He stroked her cheek and along her jawline before smoothing along the column of her throat. She muttered in her sleep but raised her chin so he might reach all of her neck. When he stroked her a second time, she let out a soft sound of enjoyment.
He moved close, allowing his erection to nestle between her thighs. She muttered and shifted from side to side as she searched for him. He cupped her breasts, toying with her nipples and pressing his chest against her back.
“Hummm…so nice…” she muttered.
Her nipples drew tight before he smoothed his hand along her body to the plane of her belly. Her skin was smoother than the finest silk, filling him with a need to possess her.
But not yet.
He stroked her belly more, listening to the sounds she made as she came closer to consciousness. She thrust her hips forward, and he didn’t deny her what she craved. He teased the curls crowning her mons before gently stroking the folds of her slit.
She hissed, arching back so he could look down the front of her body. Her breasts tempted him with puckered nipples, making his cock jerk. The need to bury himself inside was strong, but he resisted it, enjoying the bite he gained by fighting off his baser impulses.
“What…are ye doing, Saer?”
He rubbed her bud and kissed the side of her neck.
“Pleasing ye…”
He watched her tongue appear and move across her lower lip. Her body drew tight, but she never closed her thighs.
“Aye…ye are…” she admitted.
She began to tremble and lifted her bottom. His control crumbed, and he thrust forward. She was so wet, he penetrated deeply on the first thrust. But he pulled back because her sheath was too hot, too tight for him to last within its grip.
“More,” she insisted.
He was powerless to deny her, for it was the same desire pulsing through his body. There was only the need and the satisfaction to be gained. He thrust again and again, gritting his teeth against the tight clasp of her passage around his cock. She moved with him, lifting her bottom for every motion. His balls were tightening, the impending explosion beginning to darken his thoughts. He rubbed her harder and felt her sheath tightening with the first hints of ecstasy.
His seed began flowing, burning a path through his cock as he pumped his hips back and forth, burying himself as deep as possible as pleasure tore through him. It was hard and gripping, dropping him back into reality with a jolt because it had been so intense. Nareen’s passage had tightened around his length, pulling the last drops of his essence forth.
He smoothed his hands over her, covering her lips when she began to speak.
Her spirit was rising again, but the moment was too intimate to shatter with pride. So he kissed the side of her neck and smoothed the hair away from her face before he heard her sigh and surrender back into sleep’s hold.
Tomorrow, Nareen would be finished with arguing against her place beside him.
***
There was a crash outside their terrazzino at dawn.
Saer jerked and was on his feet as voices began shouting below. “Stay here.” He grabbed his sword and rushed outside.
Nareen wrinkled her nose at him and followed once she’d found her chemise.
