“Really?” She couldn’t imagine why he would want to eat dinner with her in a stuffy old motel room. “Don’t you have somewhere more interesting you’d rather be?”
He glanced over her shoulder, toward the bed, and the corner of his mouth quirked, making her heart beat harder. “I couldn’t think of anywhere more interesting than your motel room.”
Her voice raised an octave. “Arlington must be really dull then.”
“Or perhaps I just find you exciting.”
Time froze. All she was aware of was the way they were captured in the moment, their chests rising and falling, the way their eyes locked. Blood rushed to every sensitive area, her lips tingling. Her body was betraying her even while her mind shouted at her to push this gorgeous man out of the door and forget he ever existed.
Ryker stepped forward, closing the gap even farther.
“I know when I want something, Jenna,” he growled. “I don’t give up that easily.”
Every action seemed to happen in slow motion. He reached out, his fingers slipping lightly across the skin of her throat, to slide into the hair at the nape of her neck. Her breath quickened. He wore a chunky, silver ring, the cool of the metal scorching the heated flesh of her throat.
He leaned in, hesitating for a moment to allow her to move into him slightly, giving her consent. And then he kissed her.
Ryker’s lips were warm and soft. He controlled the kiss, his lips parting, causing hers to open in response. His hand cupped one side of her cheek, as his tongue lightly flicked against the tip of hers, seeking entry. She couldn’t help but respond to him, and their tongues met in a cautious, delicate dance. He tasted of mint, and her tongue touched the metal ball of his piercing, sending a thrill of excitement through her.
This is the most perfect kiss, her mind announced. No matter how long she lived or how many men she met, no first kiss would live up to this one.
They broke apart, though Ryker stayed close to her, his fingertips still lightly touching her jaw, his eyes boring into hers.
“You kissed me,” she said, unable to keep the wonder from her tone.
He smiled and her heart felt like it might explode. That was the sort of smile she could fall in love with.
All at once, her perfect moment crumbled. She could never let him see her body. They’d kissed, and he was a guy. Of course that’s what he would expect next. And forget her body; she would have to say goodbye to him in a day or two. There was no room for relationships in her life. She wouldn’t draw someone else into the mess that was her life. It wasn’t fair.
Though it broke her heart, she stepped away, moving out of his reach.
“I’m sorry, Ryker. I can’t do this.”
He shook his head. “Hey, I’m sorry. I pushed things. Will you still eat with me?”
Her emotions were in a whirl. She’d been starving only moments before, but adrenaline had sapped her appetite. Plus, she felt self-conscious eating in front of Ryker. She could imagine herself with noodles hanging from her mouth, and bits of meat stuck between her teeth.
“I’m sorry,” she said again, glancing away.
“Hey, stop it.” His tone was sharp. “I brought you dinner, and I meant for us to eat that dinner. I won’t have you changing that just because I kissed you, got it?”
She turned her gaze back to him. He stared at her intensely, an almost angry line to his mouth. She didn’t want to say no.
“Got it,” she said instead.
Jenna stepped back and allowed Ryker inside. She could barely believe she had this incredibly gorgeous man in her room, and he’d brought food. Wafts of spices and warmed meat assaulted her nostrils, making her mouth water and her stomach growl. It was as if she’d been transported into some kind of ultimate fantasy, but she was still awake.
Ryker glanced down at the trashcan filled with used wipes and an empty packet.
“You did a lot of cleaning.”
“Yeah. I like things to be clean.”
“Do you have that OCD or something?”
She snapped. “No, it’s not like that. I just like things to be clean. I have my reasons.”
He held up his hands. “I was only asking.”
And it wasn’t like that, was it? She didn’t have OCD, it was just that after she’d gotten out of hospital, her survival instinct had gone into overdrive. She’d allowed something out of her control to almost kill her, and she hadn’t planned on letting the same thing happen again. From that point on, she’d promised herself she would do everything she could to take care of her. Screw what everyone else thought.
Ryker spread the boxes across the desk, one after the other, after the other.
Wow, he must really think I eat a lot. But she couldn’t pretend she wasn’t delighted to see the food. She’d stopped for a decent breakfast of bacon, pancakes, and maple syrup mid-morning, but she hadn’t eaten since.
She was starving.
“You sure ordered a lot of food.”
He shrugged. “Yeah, well, I didn’t know what you liked, so I figured I’d get a selection. We’ve got steamed dumplings, salt and pepper ribs, special chow mein, nasi goreng, duck with mushroom, and prawn crackers.” He paused. “You can’t have Chinese food without prawn crackers. I think it’s like a law or something.”
She laughed. “Definitely a law. But I have no idea what some of those things are.”
He grinned back. “You know what? Neither do I, but the guy at the takeout recommended them.” He fished back in the bag and produced two slender paper packets. He held them out to her. “Chop sticks or forks?”
“Oh, forks,” she said, reaching for the wider packet. “I eat too fast to mess around with chopsticks.”
He smiled at her again and her heart did a back flip. “That’s my girl.”
They sorted the takeout boxes between them and sat, cross-legged on the floor. Jenna did her best not to think about the number of feet that had passed over the surface and the number of bacteria that had been brought in on the bottoms of all those shoes.
Ryker quickly distracted her from her thoughts. He speared a dumpling with his fork and lifted it to her mouth. “Here, try this. It’s good, I promise.”
Tentatively, she parted her lips and took a bite. The dumpling split, half landing in her mouth, and the other half falling. They both reached to catch the pastry and meat, their hands fumbling together as juice dribbled down her chin and she struggled to laugh around the mouthful of food. Ryker caught the half of the dumpling and popped it in his own mouth, chewing appreciatively. For once, she found she didn’t feel like a glutton eating around someone.
She caught him staring, a thoughtful smile on his face.
Quickly, she chewed and swallowed, wiping the juice from her face. “What?”
“I was just thinking I could get used to eating with you.”
Her stomach dropped and she glanced away. “No, you can’t. I have to leave in two days.”
“Why, Jenna? Why do you have to leave?”
Tears filled her eyes and her appetite vanished. “I can’t tell you, Ryker.”
He shook his head. “Nothing could be that bad.”
She lifted her eyes to his.
“You have no idea.”
Chapter Five
As soon as they’d finished eating, Ryker had made his excuses—that he couldn’t risk leaving Mikey alone for too long—and left. He’d not tried to kiss her again, something Jenna couldn’t decide if she was relieved about or bitterly disappointed. Oh, hell, who was she kidding? She’d desperately wanted him to kiss her again, to let her relive that magical moment. Even if her head told her nothing could come of it, her head appeared to have forgotten to tell her heart.
But she couldn’t get involved with someone like him for too many reasons. Putting aside her own issues, Ryker had responsibilities. Even if she could stay in one place, and Ryker actually accepted who she was—though she still suspected the moment he got even a glimpse of what she hid beneath her
clothes, he would run a mile—she didn’t think she could handle having a sullen, teenage boy in her life.
Jenna sighed and went to the bathroom to brush her teeth. She was letting her thoughts run away with themselves. A guy she’d only just met had brought her dinner and kissed her, that’s all. By the way she was over-thinking things, anyone would have thought he’d gotten down on one knee and proposed.
No, he’d fix her car, she’d get on her way, and they would never see each other again. Ryker probably just thought she looked a bit desperate and figured he’d take advantage of that. As soon as she left, he’d forget all about her.
Trying to expel all thoughts of the tattooed young man who had somehow pushed his way into her life, Jenna climbed into bed, quickly checked her emails, and then flicked off the light. She curled up in the unfamiliar bed and closed her eyes, hoping her dreams would be kind to her that night ...
***
She woke with a start, her heart pounding against her ribcage, her breath leaving her body in frantic gasps. Her skin was covered in goose bumps, the hair on her arms and the back of her neck standing to attention. Her ears strained for any sound, her eyes wide against the dark.
What had woken her? Had she been having a bad dream? But no, she was sure a noise had so violently dragged her from sleep. She’d heard something, she felt certain of it.
Jenna held her breath, trying to perceive the sound again. It had been a loud thump against the door, as if someone had been banging to try to get in. Or had she dreamed it?
You’re in a motel, she told herself. There are always loud noises in a motel.
Someone had probably come back drunk and stumbled against the door accidentally, and that’s what had woken her. But she couldn’t hear anyone drunkenly singing, or arguing with their partner, or doors slamming, or any of the usual noise associated with someone being drunk and raucous. She remembered Ryker telling her how quiet these establishments tended to be, and how there was barely enough business to keep one motel open in the small town. Would there really be drunken people banging on other doors at … she glanced at the small LED clock … 3:23 in the morning?
She spoke out loud, trying to soothe her frazzled nerves. “It can’t be him. He doesn’t get out for another,” she recalculated the dates in her head, “two days yet.”
But something about the situation had put her on high alert. The way she felt right now was exactly the same as she’d felt back then when he was in one of his tempers and she was tiptoeing around him. In those days, she’d been alert for every irritated sigh, every heavy footstep, every slam of a door.
Jenna swung her legs out of bed and went to the window. The window looked out onto the parking lot, and she slowly reached out and pulled the blind to one side, peering out. A couple of vehicles were parked out on the asphalt, but she didn’t see any sign of movement. She wished she’d taken Ryker’s cell phone number. But then she almost laughed at herself. What would she have done if she had? Call him in the middle of the night, begging for him to abandon his teenage brother and come down to her to check she didn’t have any not-so-strange men prowling around outside her motel room? No, she was being ridiculous.
She knew she wouldn’t get back to sleep again tonight. She was wide awake, adrenaline coursing through her veins. Instead, she went back to her bed, flicked on the bedside lamp, thankful for the welcome glow, and lifted her laptop onto the bed.
Pleased to have something else to concentrate on for the next few hours, Jenna got on with some work. Though her mind kept wandering, and her whole body remained tense, she did her best to write copy for the latest product she’d been sent.
She caught herself glancing continually at the clock, willing the time to go by until it got to a reasonable time to call Detective Nick Harlem.
Finally, 7:00 a.m. flashing on the digital clock. With her copy piece finished and emailed back to her client, she picked up her cell. Nerves caused butterflies to flutter around her stomach. She’d not spoken to him for months; she’d not had any reason to. At one point in her life, Detective Harlem had been her rock, her only support, but now he felt more like a stranger.
Nick Harlem’s number was programmed into her phone, so she scrolled down to his name, hesitated for a moment, and then hit the call button. She took a deep breath and placed the phone to her ear. As the ringing sounded, she chewed at a piece of loose skin on her lip, hard enough to draw blood. The taste of iron filled her mouth.
“Nick Harlem.” His voice came down the phone, so familiar it was as if she’d stepped back in time.
“Detective Harlem,” she started, but her voice came out as a squeak, so she cleared her throat and tried again. “Nick, I’m sorry to disturb you so early in the morning. It’s Jenna Armstrong.”
He paused and she heard him sigh. “Oh, hell, Jenna. I’m so sorry. I’ve been meaning to contact you, but I forgot to note down last time you changed your number, and I never quite got around to tracing your new one.”
“Well, I’m calling you from it now, so you can note it down, right?”
“Sure, I’ll do that. Changing your number all the time kind of makes you hard to contact.”
“Yeah, that’s kind of the point,” she said.
A rustling came down the line and in her mind’s eyes she saw the clean-cut, auburn-haired man in his mid-thirties continuing about his morning routine as he spoke to her, probably getting dressed and making breakfast. “So how are you doing?” he asked her.
“I’ve been better. The date’s coming up, and it’s getting me a little spooked.”
“There’s no need to worry, Jenna. He’s got no reason to come after you.”
She almost laughed. “Are you kidding?”
His tone grew stern. “It’s not your fault he got put away. He was the one behind the wheel, he was the one who was three times over the limit, and he was the one who forced you into the car.”
“All Garrett will think about is how I told the court he locked me in the car, and how I begged him not to drive. I saw it in his eyes during the trial. He blames me for going down, and he’ll find me and punish me for it.”
“It’s more likely he’ll just want to get on with his life.”
“You didn’t know him like I did.”
“You’re right, I didn’t.”
She paused, not wanting to feel like an idiot, but needing to say what was on her mind. “The thing is, Nick, I’ve had this horrible feeling like he’s around again. I can’t describe it. It’s like I can sense him or something.”
“How can that even be? He doesn’t get out for another couple of days.”
“I know, but could you just check for me? I have this horrible feeling and it won’t go away.”
“Sure, Jenna. I’ll make some calls. You’ll be on this number?”
“Yeah, thanks, Nick.”
“No problem. Take care, okay? I’ll speak to you soon.”
Reluctantly, she ended the call. She didn’t feel any better. Her common sense tried to tell her if Nick Harlem wasn’t worried, she shouldn’t be either, but her instinct was telling her something different.
Though she wanted to hide in the room until Nick called her back and reassured her that Garrett was still locked behind bars, for another couple of days anyway, she craved a sweet, milky coffee, and something starchy and full of sugar. She thought she remembered passing a coffee house on the way to the motel. It was only a block or two from here, and even she could manage to walk that.
She brushed her teeth and dressed in Capri leggings and a long t-shirt to cover her stomach and backside. The day was already warm, so she slid her feet into a pair of flip-flops, tied her hair back, and slipped a pair of sunglasses on her face.
The quick stroll in the bright morning light helped to dispel the terrors she’d experienced during the night. Her recollection of driving past a coffee shop had been correct. A couple of turns brought her to the right place, and she pushed open the door to the aroma of freshly ground c
offee, warm pastries, and the hiss of milk steaming.
Jenna placed her order and took a seat in the window. At this early hour, the place was almost deserted, and it only took a few minutes for the waitress to bring over her breakfast.
The sweet, creamy taste of coffee from a cup as big as a cereal bowl immediately made her feel better. She took a bite of the iced doughnut, almost groaning as the fat and sugar hit her tongue.
The café door opened, making her glance up. She almost choked on her doughnut as she saw Ryker standing in the doorway, grinning at her, his blue eyes bright with amusement. He wore jeans and a tight fitting black t-shirt which showed off his tattooed biceps. A chain ran from the belt of his jeans, hooking to the back, and he wore a thick, black leather cuff around his wrist. Quickly, she chewed and swallowed, her hand held over her mouth as she did so.
“What are you doing here?”
He approached and pulled out the seat opposite and sat down. He folded his ankle over his thigh and sat back. “I was taking Mikey to school.”
She peered out of the window to where the boy sat in the passenger seat. He saw her looking and waved a hand. She lifted her own and waved back.
Frowning, she said, “But the school is on the other side of town.”
“Not to my place, it’s not. Only if you’re coming from the garage.”
“Oh, right.” Something else occurred to her. “And didn’t Mikey get suspended?”
“Oh, dammit. I’ve never been a good liar.” He gave a crooked grin and reached up to scruff his hair. “I might have just been checking if you were up and about.”
Automatically, she leaned across the table and smacked his arm. “See, I knew you were here for a reason. This is close to stalking, you know?”
The words struck a chord with her and she shivered.
Ryker noticed. “Hey, are you okay?” he asked with a frown.
She forced a smile. “Yeah, fine.”
“Are you going to be here for another fifteen minutes?”
Cut Too Deep Page 4
