Her hand slid down my arm and covered my hand through her jeans. She wanted more. Her hips rocked in rhythm with the circles I was tracing around her swollen clit. I could almost feel it pulsing to its own beat.
Feeling how wet she was and how hot she was becoming, it was all I could do to not take her at that moment. A taste is all she could have and all I could allow. I needed to build her up for more than just the orgasm she was likely going to have. I needed to leave her breathless, wanting more. I needed her to come to me.
Her hips started bucking and her hands flew to the back of my slacks, gripping them as her orgasm built. Her soft moans were turning louder as her hips moved faster.
“Carl, don’t stop. Oh, God, please don’t stop”
She leaned forward and gripped the sink as her legs started shaking. Stopping was the last thing on my mind. I sped up and put more pressure on her clit. Her back arched as she flung her head back, exposing her neck for the first time all night—and a large yellow bruise.
Anger threatened to erupt. I was angry at the asshole who did it to her, but even angrier she had kept it from me. Just as I was about to pull my hand out of her jeans and punish her by taking her orgasm away, her orgasm ripped through her body.
“Fuck!” Her entire body started shaking and I wrapped my other arm around her to keep her upright. I decided to punish her another way: I’d mark her as mine.
I spun her around and walked her backwards toward the kitchen table, sucking on her neck the entire time. She tried to take off my tie and I batted her hands away. I reached over to grab her purse and stood up, pushing it into her hands.
She looked at her purse and back up to me. “You don’t want me to stay?”
“Do you want to be here?” I bent down and kissed her neck again as I took the scarf off completely. “The only marks allowed on your neck are the ones I put there.”
Her hands went to her neck as she realized I had just seen the bruise she was trying to hide. “Carl.”
I grabbed her elbow and pulled her to the door, then to her car. “That is one way I don’t like hearing my name. The let-me-explain tone is one you will never speak again to me. You will tell me when someone hurts you because I will always find out.” I stopped in front of her car and turned to her. “And believe me you want my anger directed at the person who hurt you instead of the person who kept it from me.”
I opened her car door and put her inside. After I buckled her in, I put my face inches from hers and spoke low, “Tonight I would’ve made your body convulse in ways you’ve never felt, but you fucked up by not trusting me. Don’t ever lie to me or keep something from me again.”
I stood and shut her door without waiting for a response.
I was stunned as he slammed the car door in my face. He only got about two steps up his walkway before I got out and started yelling back.
“Just who the fuck do you think you are?” I ran up and shoved his back.
He turned quickly, but I jumped out of his way. I needed to stay out of his grip. “I’m the man who’ll take care of you if you let me!”
“I don’t need taking care of!” I buttoned my jeans. “And don’t ever touch me again.”
He got close and whispered. “I will touch you again, and you will again beg me not to stop.” He backed up, but reached for my neck. “Who hurt you and why didn’t you tell me about it?”
“I told you I needed a friend, Carl.” I walked away, but was jerked back to him when grabbed my arm. “Let go!”
“I am your friend, Goddamn it! Who hurt you?”
“No! You’re acting like a jealous boyfriend and you are not my boyfriend!” I pulled my arm free and walked back to my car. “I need a friend, not a lover.”
He came after me, but didn’t touch me. “We can be both. Why does it have to be all or nothing with you?”
I turned, almost running into him, and slammed my hands against his chest to push him backwards. “Because everything is all or nothing! Life is all or nothing!”
I got in my car and slammed the door on him. I sped out of his driveway, leaving him standing there, shaking his head.
“Why are you crying?” Lance’s face held no sympathy for my tears. In fact, he was somewhere between amused and irritated.
“I’m sorry. I’m supposed to be happy to learn you’ve lied to me this entire time?” I started to pack faster.
“You can sleep with whomever you want to. I’m not sure why you need to move out?”
I stopped and looked at him. “You’re serious? Why would I stay in an open relationship with you? If I wanted freedom to fuck whomever I wanted, I would’ve left you. I didn’t want that.”
“You don’t have to sleep with other people.”
I shook my head. “You just don’t get it.”
“We don’t have to have an all or nothing relationship, Rachael. We can have everything if you want it.”
“I don’t know what I want anymore, but I do know I don’t want a lying piece of shit next to me when I wake up each morning.”
“That’s your choice.”
I scoffed. “I can’t believe I wasted so much time on you.”
“Wasted?” He got angry and took a step forward. “How can you say you wasted it?”
“How can you say it isn’t wasted?” I motioned around the room. “What do we have at the end of this? We have nothing.”
“What did you want? What did you expect? A marriage? Kids?” He shook his head.
“We could’ve talked about it.”
“We did!” He ran his fingers through his hair. “Marriage and kids were never what we wanted. We never had those goals. The business was our goal and we’re on the road to success. I just don’t understand why you need to throw it away.”
I spoke quietly. I was ashamed to admit what I was just going to admit and it hurt. “That was before I fell in love with you.”
“Love doesn’t exist. It’s a figment of one’s imagination to allow people to get through the day.” He shook his head. “You may be in love with the idea of it, but when it comes down to it, Rachael, you aren’t the marrying kind. Dirty diapers, screaming kids, and household chores aren’t your thing, sweetheart.
“You’re better off staying the mistress, who we come to for great sex and to brainstorm ideas for our businesses. You are most definitely not wife material.”
It was a long night of no sleeping. Memory Lane kept me up, hitting all the potholes of my life. I rolled over and hit my alarm before it went off.
The shower helped to ease my tension as I let it beat hot water down my back. I wished it could’ve washed away all the negative energy I had stored, but I would have to start over to get rid of that. And until I could get Lance out of my life, there was no way I would ever be free of that negativity again.
I looked in the mirror and closed my eyes. I could lie and tell people I went out drinking to explain the bloodshot, puffy eyes. I could lie and say I went home with an amazing lover to explain the marks on my neck. However, I wouldn’t do any of that.
I reached for another scarf out of the closet and wrapped it around my neck. The eye drops in my purse helped the redness of my eyes, but I couldn’t find my makeup bag. I groaned. It was back at Carl’s. I had taken it out when Amy asked for lip-gloss, but Carl picked up my purse when he threw me out and left the makeup bag on the table.
I looked to the ceiling, disgusted with my options. I considered calling in sick and having new makeup sent overnight, but I didn’t want Lance at my door. I could’ve just gone to work as is, but then the rumors would fly and give people more reason to believe his lies.
I looked at my phone and groaned again. I reached for it and pulled up Carl’s info. I hesitated, but I needed to call him before Amy found it. I hit the call button and cleared my throat.
“I bet you’re calling for your makeup bag.” Carl’s voice sounded light and amused.
“Well, as a matter of fact, I am. I’m so glad you found it before A
my.”
Carl chuckled. “I never said that. If you want it in one piece, you’d better come get it.”
I looked at my watch. I wasn’t due to the meeting for a while. “Fine, but I’m coming over for the bag. I have meetings to attend. You aren’t the only busy one.”
“Okay. Amy’s friend is picking her up soon, anyway. She’ll probably be gone by the time you get here.”
“That sounds as if I don’t want to see her. You know that isn’t true.”
“Hey, I didn’t say that.” Carl pulled the phone away a little. “Amy, will you make sure your bag is by the door, please?”
“It is, Dad.”
“Go check again.”
Amy huffed. “Fine.”
He spoke into the phone again. “I didn’t mean to imply that’s what you were saying. I only meant you wouldn’t be begged to apply makeup again.”
“Oh.” I let out a sigh. “I’ll be over in a few.”
I looked at myself in the mirror. I kept finding myself back there with him. I needed distance. After what happened the night before, I knew I could never trust myself around Carl again. I grabbed my purse, determined to have this be the last time for a long while.
I pulled into the driveway and started shaking. I had promised myself on the way to his house this would be the last time I’d come over. I wasn’t sure if it was because I may not be able to keep that promise, or if I was terrified, I could. Had I really wanted it to be my last time?
The night before in his kitchen had only confused me more. I craved his touch, but hated how he treated me afterward. Maybe I should’ve told him what Lance had done, but it’s my battle to fight. If he had only asked about it instead of throwing me out I wouldn’t be so confused. I won’t allow myself to be treated like that again.
I wanted to honk and have Carl bring it out to the car, but I didn’t think it was something he would’ve done. I took a deep breath and got out. After the doorbell sounded, I heard Carl yell to come in. I opened the door and turned toward the front room.
His voice was behind me. “We’re in the kitchen.”
I turned and headed for the kitchen, but wasn’t prepared for what I would see. Carl was sitting in the kitchen chair completely still and Amy was on his lap. He started to smile and she yelled at him.
“Daddy! I need you to stay still.”
He looked at her. “Sorry.” He looked back to me and shrugged.
Amy was doing her best to apply my makeup to Carl. The fact this strong and very masculine male had his young daughter in his lap applying makeup to his face had me mesmerized. He was wearing the shade I wanted to wear and it didn’t look too bad.
Amy tugged on my arm to get my attention. I hadn’t realized she had gotten off his lap. “It isn’t as good as what you do, but Dad’s a boy. It would probably look better on a girl.”
I finally stopped looking at how ridiculous, but sexy, he looked. The makeup was an incredibly horrible job, but the fact he sat there and wore it proudly was the sexiest thing I’d ever seen him do. I looked down to Amy who was still tugging on my hand. “I think your dad is a very pretty boy.”
“Oh, no. I’m no pretty boy.” Carl teased.
A car outside honked. “They’re here!” Amy ran to get her things.
He looked at me and cocked a half smile. “Would you mind going to the door? I really . . .” He pointed to himself.
I smiled. “Of course I’ll see her off.” I turned and walked to a bouncing Amy waiting for me to open the door for her. “Come on, sweets.”
I took her out to the car and talked to the mom of her friend for a moment or two. The two girls screamed when Amy got in the car and started planning things to do once they got there. The new waterslide was first on their agenda. I had to admit, that did sound like fun.
I watched them pull out of the driveway and take off. I stood there a little longer than I should have, wishing I had grabbed my makeup kit when I saw Amy to the car. I could’ve just left without going back in if I had it. I turned and walked up the steps a little slower than I should have.
I took a deep breath and sighed when I shut the front door. I knew what I was about to do and there was nothing I could do to talk myself out of it. I was in trouble.
Carl was wiping his face with a paper towel. “How do you ladies get this stuff off your face?”
I couldn’t answer him.
“I know I look ridiculous.” He smiled. “When your little girl asks you to play with her, you don’t turn her down.”
I started to walk toward him.
“I’m glad you’re here. I could use some help getting this stuff off.”
I walked faster and grabbed his face with both hands, bringing his face to mine. The kiss I gave him left no question what I wanted from him. He wrapped his arms around me and I jumped up, wrapping my legs around him.
He grabbed my ass and walked me over to the counter, setting me on it. I pulled away to loosen his tie and he covered my hands.
“Rachael?”
I looked at his eyes, his lips, and his tie in my hands, and then back up to his eyes. “Don’t question it. Please, don’t think right now.”
He looked at me for a moment and pulled me to the edge of the counter. He looked at the scarf before he removed it. One hand went behind my head and pulled me to him further as he bent down and kissed my neck. My fingers tangled in his hair, trying to get him closer. I needed him more than I’d ever needed him before. More than I’d ever thought possible to need another person.
I went back to loosening his tie. I need to get him undressed. He pulled back and pulled the tie over his head. I started unbuttoning his shirt. He rubbed my thighs with his hands a few times before reaching up for my shirt. We locked eyes and held each other’s gaze as we undressed each other.
My hands rubbed his strong chest on the way down to grab his belt buckle. He covered my hand. “Not in the kitchen.”
He allowed his eyes to drift downward to see the bra I had on and smiled. He had purchased it for me after my arrest. He cupped my breast and ran his thumbs over my nipples. His hands tickled my sides as he lowered them to my hips. In one thrust, he pulled me to him. I immediately wrapped my legs around him again.
We started kissing as he carried me through the back hallway and up the stairs. He stopped at the top and put his forehead to mine.
I pulled his face up to look at me. “Have you removed the bed from the guest room?”
He shook his head and looked at his bedroom.
I pulled his face back to mine again. “Hey, the guestroom has a really nice bed.” I kissed him again.
He kissed me back hard and walked me through the guest room door, kicking it shut with his foot. I loved the feeling of falling whenever he dropped us to the bed—or sofa as it was the last time.
I reached down again for his pants and he stopped me. “Carl, stop teasing me.”
He smiled and slid down a little to my pants. I didn’t hesitate to help him remove them at all. The experience I’d had with his tongue on my neck was enough to know he knew how to use it.
The second he had all of me available to him, I felt the familiar circling of his thumbs. The pressure was exquisite. He knew exactly what my body needed and it craved more.
I reached down and rubbed his arm as I rolled my hips in circles with him. “Carl.”
I arched my back as his mouth made contact and sucked what was just throbbing for more. My thighs squeezed his head and my fingers laced in his hair as I rocked my hips in rhythm with him.
It was magnificent and quick. My back arched completely off the bed as I held him to me, hoping he didn’t stop. I wasn’t sure how much more I could take, but I was more than willing to push the limits.
I put her clit between my lips and continued to suck. I didn’t care she might have ripped the hair off my head. All I wanted was to please her. I’d thought of little else every time I closed my eyes.
I entered two fingers in her and curled up
. Her hands left my hair and grabbed the headboard. Her thighs were still crushing my head.
“Carl!” Her breathing became more ragged and her moans were louder than I’d ever heard her before. “Oh, fuck. Fuck.” Her screams and cries were music to my ears and I couldn’t stop smiling. She’d never be able to get enough of me now—which was good because I already couldn’t get enough of her.
As she lay there limp on the bed, trying to get her breathing under control, I stood and finished undressing. Just looking at her naked body glistening from the orgasms I’d already given her, made me hunger for her more.
I slipped my pants off and tried to get the wallet out of my back pocket. I should’ve left them on to get that out. It was just awkward trying to hold it and unfasten the button of the pocket at the same time. I looked down as I felt her hand wrap around me.
“Do you know how long I’ve waited to see this?”
I shook my head, mesmerized as I watched her pump me with her fist. I put my head back and closed my eyes. I moaned aloud as I felt the wetness of her tongue. “Rachael.” I gripped the pants in my hand tighter as she wrapped her lips around me. “Oh, fuck me.”
She backed her head away, but kept pumping her hand. “I hope to soon.”
My eyes rolled to the back of my head as she started sucking on me again. I wanted to watch her, I wanted to have more than just the feeling be in my memory, but I knew if I had done that, I would’ve lost it all right then. I fought for the wallet and ripped the button off my slacks. I grabbed the condom and threw the wallet.
As soon as I ripped it open, she backed away and took it from me. I opened my mouth, but no sound came out as she slid it on. I had to take slow, controlled breaths to stop from losing it all.
When I opened my eyes, she was on the bed and motioned for me to join her. I didn’t hesitate. She giggled when I landed hard and caused the bed to bounce. I got between her legs and hovered over her.
She reached up and pulled my face to her for another kiss and I gladly accepted. Still kissing, she reached down to guide me to her. “Please, I need this. I need you.”
Striving for Perfection (Striving Series Book 2) Page 19
