And then Sadie had to come over and ruin it all. She’s such a bitch. I don’t know what I ever saw in her. I’m not even sure that this baby is mine. Sadie wasn’t exactly a loyal girlfriend. How can she be so sure?
And now, Avery is talking to Kora. Kora may have teared up at what I said, but Kora and I don’t have the best history. She wasn’t always my biggest fan. She doesn’t approve of my romantic life, even though she knows that I never cheat on anyone. I’m very honest about who I am and what I do. I don’t do long term relationships. I’m not interested in that. At least, I haven’t been for years. Kora is the type of woman who is very suspicious of perpetually single men. It’s as if she doesn’t believe that a man can be a bachelor and happy about it. It’s as if all single men are there to break women’s hearts and break up marriages. Well, I never date anyone married. I haven’t even dated anyone who was dating anyone else. I don’t like the drama, and I don’t need it.
Suddenly, my phone rings. I pull it out and see that it’s my other phone. Shit. I never get calls on it unless it’s something important. I’m not in the best headspace for it, but I can’t not answer.
“Yes?”
“We need you in Playa del Carmen, Mexico on the 17th of next month.”
I look down at my calendar.
“I’m actually going to be nearby in Tulum for my brother’s wedding that weekend.”
Kora and Liam have waited for seven years to make it official, and now that they’re engaged, they have decided that they couldn’t wait the customary year to plan everything. They are going to do the whole thing in less than two months. My gift to them is that I’m picking up the tab for everything, including the wedding planner, and it’s no skin off my nose if they want to get it done so quickly. The wedding planner, however, is more than a little miffed. If it all goes smoothly, there’s a big tip in it for her for the rush job.
“The target will be on his yacht for his niece’s birthday party that day.”
“I actually put in for some time off that weekend.”
There’s a pause. I know I said the wrong thing.
“You don’t get time off. You’re an agent, and we need you there.”
Well, technically, I’m a spy. If you want to get even more technical, I’m an assassin, but the CIA frowns on that kind of literal interpretation of my job description.
“Right,” I say.
“I’ll be in touch with more details later,” he says and hangs up.
I take a deep breath.
I’m really getting sick of this job. I’m counting down the days until my contract runs out in two years, and I can actually enjoy my life as a civilian. A very rich civilian, at that. The funny thing is that I actually got involved with the CIA completely by accident. I was at one of those career fairs that the University of Southern California puts on for its students every fall and spring. I had no idea what I wanted to do with my life after graduation, so I was walking around and talking to all the recruiters. And the CIA was there. I gave them my resume, and a few days later, they called me in for an interview. After a few rounds of interviews, I took a bunch of tests. I should’ve known right then and there that this wouldn’t be a good fit. I do great on tests, always have, but I hate them. I have no business working at any organization that’s based on tests.
Apparently, I did quite well on the tests, and they moved me further along. More tests followed. Then ten weeks of training and fieldwork. Then a special agent from a special branch of the CIA came to talk to me. He knew I was trying to do my own thing – building my start up, travel around the world – so he had a proposal for me. Join his unit and I wouldn’t have to work full-time. Just on on-call basis. Fulfill a mission or two a month, get a full-time salary, and be free the rest of the time to do my own thing. The only thing was that I couldn’t tell anyone about what I actually did, being a spy and all. You have to remember, I didn’t have any money then. I wanted to travel and see the world. I had a kernel of an idea for my start up. It sounded like the perfect job.
Well, eight years later, it’s not so much. Despite my best efforts, I’m apparently quite good at this, and I’ve moved up within the unit. Though I only do a few missions a year now, they still call on me for pretty much every complicated mission they have. And this one, in Mexico, is not going to be any walk in the park, that’s for sure.
I spot Avery by the dessert table. She’s all alone and looks much calmer now. Perhaps, it’s a good time to approach and explain.
“I want to go home,” she says before I get the chance to open my mouth.
“What?”
“I want to go home. Will you take me home?” She taps her foot on the floor, impatient. It reminds me of Sadie. I cringe.
“It’s still early. You don’t want to stay a little longer?”
“No. After finding out that my date is going to have a baby with his ex-girlfriend, I’ve had just about all I can handle.”
She walks toward Liam and Kora, gives them each a brief hug, and says that she has to go. They thank her for coming, and she and Kora exchange numbers. I want to stop her, but we’re already on our way out.
“I’m sorry. Avery, I’m sorry,” I run after her. She shrugs, but continues steadfastly toward my car.
“What do you want me to say? I just found out. I honestly don’t know for sure if it’s mine.”
“And what are you doing in the meantime?” she asks, turning to face me at the passenger door to my car.
“What do you mean?”
“Are you going to her ultrasound appointments? Are you going to go to her Lamaze classes with her?”
“I have no idea,” I shrug. I haven’t given that any thought whatsoever.
“Well, if it is your baby, you probably should. Otherwise, you’ll miss out.”
“Okay, fine,” I nod. “Maybe I will.”
“I’m not really sure if I want to date someone with a baby on the way.” She gets into my car and slams the door.
Now, I’m completely lost. I have no idea what is the right thing to say or do. I follow her into the car.
“What do you want from me?”
“I want you to drive,” she says looking straight ahead. “I want to go home.”
I start the car and pull out of the parking lot.
“This is what’s going on from my perspective,” I say, taking a deep breath. I’ve never worked this hard with a girl. A real change for me.
“Sadie and I dated briefly. I thought she was cheating on me. We broke up, largely because of that and partly because we weren’t a good match. I don’t have any proof of this, but she didn’t deny it either. Then a couple of weeks ago, she insisted on meeting for dinner. And that’s when she told me that she is pregnant. I have no idea if that baby is mine, but it’s all her decision. I’m fine with whatever she decides. I don’t have a say in it, I know that. I also can’t find out if the baby is mine until it’s born. So I won’t know for nine months.”
She nods, but keeps looking straight ahead. From her demeanor, I know that she’s listening. So, I continue.
“I know that this is a complication. For us. But I also know that I want to see you again. I’m not someone who’s keen on relationships, which I’m sure my future sister-in-law filled you in about, but I feel something for you. Something completely different.”
“What do you mean?”
Finally, I have her attention!
“I like you, Avery. A lot.”
Luckily, there’s a red light. I turn to face her.
“I like you a lot. You don’t know me very well, but I never say that. Never.”
“I don’t want to date someone who has a baby momma,” she whispers, turning to face me.
“I know,” I shrug. “I wouldn’t either, but there’s nothing I can do about that right now.”
We turn onto Topanga Canyon Boulevard and disappear into the hills.
“What do you want me to say?” she asks.
“Nothing. I just wan
t you to know that I felt something in that kiss we shared. I felt a lot. And I’d like to see you again. And I’m sorry about what happened with my ex. But I have no interest in being with her, regardless of what happens with the baby.”
“What are you going to do if it’s yours?” she asks.
“I’m going to step up and be part of its life. I’m going to see the baby and build a relationship. I don’t love the idea – don’t get me wrong – but I don’t want my child to grow up without a father. Especially, when I can easily participate in his or her life.”
Honestly, I didn’t know that’s how I felt until this very moment. Goosebumps run down my arms at even the thought of being a father. But that’s the right thing to do. I know it.
I don’t say anything else the rest of the way. Neither does she. I do look over at her occasionally, though, and I feel her stealing the occasional glance at me as well.
I pull into the parking lot by her apartment and park next to the only other car in the lot, her Prius. She gets out of the car, and I follow.
“You don’t need to walk to me to the door,” Avery says.
“I know,” I say, following her. I’m not sure if my presence is welcomed, but I’m trying my best to make up for the wrecked night.
When we reach her door, she turns to face me. I take a step forward. We’re so close to each other, I can feel and smell her peppermint breath on my lips. If she didn’t want me this close, she could take a step back. But she doesn’t.
“I’m sorry about tonight,” I whisper. I lean closer to her. At first, her eyes look past me, somewhere in the distance, but a moment later, they meet mine.
“I’m sorry too,” she whispers.
I don’t know what that means. Does she want to see me again but won’t because of what happened? Or does that mean that she’s just generally sorry about what occurred?
“Can I call you?” I ask.
She doesn’t reply. It’s now or never. Just go for it, I say to myself. I press my lips to her lips and bring her closer to me. At first, she doesn’t respond. But then, the moment takes over, and she kisses me back. I push her against her apartment door, cradle her head in my hands. I let my hands run up and down her body. I’m pleased when she doesn’t stop me. A few moments later, I pull away.
“Can I call you?” I ask again.
She’s breathless. After a few moments, her eyes manage to focus on mine.
“Yes,” she whispers and gives me another little kiss on the lips. “Against my better judgment, yes,” she adds.
I smile as she opens the door to her apartment. I want her to invite me in. I pray and hope for it, but I’m not surprised when it doesn’t happen.
“You better call,” Avery says and waves good-bye, before closing the door in my face. I nod and smile. I’m definitely going to call. This isn’t some empty promise that I typically make other girls. Avery is different. So different, in fact, it’s frightening me. I walk back to my car with shivers running down my spine. What is this? Anxiety? Fear? I’ve never felt this way about another person before. I don’t know whether I want to curse Aunt Dolly for matching us or give her a huge tip. What the fuck is going on? I turn up Guns ‘n Roses and race back down to Malibu in a state of awe.
Chapter 13 - Avery
The following morning, I tell Cynthia everything that happened over our Starbucks coffee. I don’t hold anything back. I tell her the good and the bad, and about these crazy feelings that I have developed for Logan during just one date.
“He’s kind of a dick. You should’ve seen how he looked at my apartment – like he felt sorry for me – but then he’s sweet. You should’ve heard what he said to his brother in his engagement speech.”
“But he’s having a baby? With his ex?”
“Yes, that is a problem.’
“But it may not be his,” Cynthia says.
“It may not. But it may be, and I don’t know if I need that kind of drama in my life.”
“On the other hand, it’s his ex, and he doesn’t seem to like her very much. How much drama could it be? So he’ll pay child support and see the kid every other weekend. That’s not too bad. Plus, it’ll show you what kind of dad he can be.”
I choke on my coffee, burning the roof of my mouth.
“We had one date! Are you really talking about his future potential as a father?”
“Hey, one date is all it takes.”
“What do you mean?”
“One of these days, you’re going to go on a date with someone who you’ll end up spending the rest of your life with. It may be Logan, it may not. But you don’t know,” Cynthia says.
“You’re freaking me out,” I say. “Why didn’t you get any muffins? I want a muffin.”
“Oh, I forgot. No worries, the bakery across the street has way yummier ones.” She grabs her wallet and heads toward the door.
“No, I was just kidding,” I say. “You don’t have to get me a muffin. I’ll get one later.”
“It’s fine,” Cynthia says. “I really want one too. I’ll be right back.”
I’m left alone surrounded by a sea of flowers. One of the things I love most about flowers is that, no matter how alone I am, their presence always brings me comfort. Especially daffodils and daisies. They aren’t the fanciest flowers by a long shot, hardly anyone requests them for bouquets, let alone centerpieces, but they are the friendliest. Whenever I look at them, I can’t help but smile. They’re a constant reminder that everything will be okay. The world isn’t such a bad place, as long as daffodils and daisies continue to flourish.
There’s a knock on the door. Cynthia’s hands must be too full with muffins and coffee to open it herself. I head toward the door, but it opens before I get there.
“Hello Avery,” he says in his sultry voice. Cold shivers run down my spine. I’m still clutching a loose bouquet of daffodils and daises, which I was just enjoying. Only now, I’m grasping it, squeezing the life out of it.
“Cal,” I whisper. “What are you doing here?”
My voice breaks a little at his name. My mouth runs dry. I take a deep breath and finish the question with strength. He can’t see me wither.
“I wanted to see you. I miss you,” he says. He’s shorter than Logan, but still much taller than I am. He recently got a buzz cut, which makes him look even more menacing.
“You can’t be here,” I say.
“I know, but this girl I was with broke up with me, and it made me realize how much I’ve missed you.” Cal comes closer to me. Much too close. I back away.
“You were seeing someone?” I ask. Perhaps there’s hope that he can be someone else’s problem now. Not that I want some other unsuspecting girl to have a stalker, I just don’t want him stalking me anymore.
“I know, I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have. But after you took out that restraining order on me, what could I do? Will you forgive me?”
What. The. Fuck?
“You can’t be here,” I say in the most confident and self-assured voice that I can manage to muster. “The restraining order is still in effect.”
Suddenly, I’m backed against the wall. Freshly cut tulips press into the back of my head. Cal leans close to me, putting his hand on the wall behind the tulips. The only thing that’s separating us is the bouquet of daffodils and daisies, I hold in my extended hand as if it were a weapon. We’re so close that his significant beer belly presses against them, pushing their heads toward the floor. Not a great weapon.
“I miss you,” he whispers. Out of the corner of my eye, I can see that his arms are stronger now than they were before. More defined. He has started to work out. His bicep flexes a couple of times and my knees grow weak. I’m not sure I can hold myself up for much longer.
“What are you doing here?” Cynthia marches into the store. Her authoritative voice makes both Cal and I flinch. “You can’t be here. She has a restraining order out against you. I’m calling the police.”
“I was just checking in with
my girl,” Cal says, backing away from me.
“Well, she doesn’t want you checkin’ in. You’re lucky that you’re not in jail right now doing time for assault,” Cynthia says, taking out her phone. “I’m calling the police.”
“Fine, fine, I’m leaving,” Cal says. “I miss you, Avery. Call me.”
I let out a big sigh of relief when the door shuts closed behind him. I find the nearest chair and collapse into it.
“Yes, hello? I need someone to come out to make a report about a violation of a restraining order…No, he’s not here anymore. He just left,” Cynthia says and gives the police our address.
“What are you doing?” I ask when she hangs up.
“The police will be here within the hour. They said that you have to report each violation of the restraining order. And that’s what we’re doing.”
I’m so happy that she’s here. Not just for making Cal leave, but also for calling the cops. I’m not sure I’d have the strength to follow up as quickly as she had. All the adrenaline pumping through my body has vanished, and I feel too weak to utter a single word.
‘Thank you,’ I mouth.
* * *
A couple of days later, Dolly and I meet for lunch to discuss the date – to conduct a post-mortem, of a sort. She had called the day after the engagement, right after Cal left, but I was in no mood to talk. I even asked Cynthia to text her back for me and schedule something for later in the week.
I meet her in her office. She’s dressed in a loose-fitting light pink pant suit, which she pulls off marvelously. It hugs her in all the right places and does not make her short legs look stubby, which is almost always the case with me. It’s probably all the heels, I decide. In addition to her gigantic diamond wedding set, she’s also wearing a diamond ring on the right ring finger. It’s in the shape of a bow tie, and she’s wearing it right at the tip of her nail, near the first knuckle.
Auctioned to Him 6: Damage Page 55
