With Sophie’s money.
She wasn’t a fool, she tried to tell herself—contractors asked for a draw against materials all the time. But Sophie knew she’d cut corners—most of the bids she’d gotten were out of her budget, so she’d gone with the lowest one, a guy who seemed earnest and honest. He’d had a list of references but she hadn’t checked them because she was too busy, too tired.
And now she would pay.
The drive back was a blur as she frantically tried to whittle away her vision of the grounds to what she could do on her own with no more budget and even less time.
Armando could help. He wasn’t a landscape designer, but he had a feel for plants and was a hard worker, as were the others on his crew. She wondered if he could help her find more workers…but where would she find the money to pay for extra labor?
I could get my brother Jesse and my brother-in-law Vince to help, Jenna had offered. Cade was also extremely resourceful and good with his hands.
No. She wouldn’t ask for a favor. She didn’t know Jesse or Vince, and Jenna worked too hard already. Cade had already done so much—even if he hadn’t disappeared last night.
Besides, she didn’t have the heavy equipment and she didn’t know where she could scrape up the extra money to rent it. She could ask Maura, but her friend had already been too generous to Sophie—who didn’t deserve it. Not if, she, with all her vaunted skills at assessing and managing people, had made such an elemental and costly mistake.
No, she’d just have to cut back on her ambitious plans. And find someone to replace the landscaper—quick. She still had the other half of the budgeted funds to fund the project. Not that the paltry amount would get her anywhere with a reputable landscaper....
Oh, God, she was so tired.
Then she pulled into the hotel’s driveway and spotted Cade’s car.
Sophie parked and dropped her head against the steering wheel. She could not deal with him, not now. She was desperate for time to think, to get a firm hold on her shaken control.
She sat there for a long moment, trying to decide what to do.
She could go to her workshop and forge ahead while she reordered her priorities and revised her plans.
Or she could look for Cade, find out why he was here and get one worry off her list. One little clearing in the maelstrom that threatened to overtake her if she didn’t hang on tightly to her poise and to the discipline that had gotten her this far.
Then he would return to Jenna’s, while she would do the smart thing and go to bed. Wake up tomorrow and pick up the pieces.
There. She had a plan.
Sophie went looking for Cade.
THE LAST PLACE SHE EXPECTED to find him was in her bed, sound asleep.
She paused in the doorway, shaking her head. The sheer gall of the man—he thought it was okay to vanish, not tell her where he was or if he’d be back, then return when she wasn’t even there, let himself into her home and crawl into her bed? She’d bared her body to him and all but bared her soul, and this was how he treated her?
You bastard. She took a step forward, ready to yell at him, to tell him exactly what she thought of him, the stupid, insensitive jerk—
Then she spotted them. Sweet heaven. The images she’d seen on his laptop screen, blown up large. They’d been stunning in miniature, but blown up…
They were beyond beautiful. She sank to a crouch before them, fingers covering her mouth in silent wonder. They were even framed, beautifully so. She knew exactly which room each would grace, and would have even if she hadn’t been part of the discussion.
Oh, Cade… So this was what he’d spent the day doing.
“Do you like them?” His voice was rough with sleep.
She whirled on her knees. “Cade, they’re…” Her voice broke, and she was terribly afraid she was going to cry, so she averted her head.
“Sophie?” Worry shadowed his tone. “Are you okay?”
She reached for one of the prints and rose, struggling for the self-possession that had been second nature until she’d met this man. She’d been doing fine without him, and then he’d taken over the grounds, and the casita, and the decorating, and her bed. He’d invaded every part of her life, and he’d held her while she cried, and, oh God, when he was gone…
She fought hard to steady her voice. If she let herself weaken now… “Of course I like them. Let’s see how this one looks hung up.” She handled the artwork gently but crossed to the door with swift steps, grappling to hold herself together.
But when she heard his footsteps behind her, that hold began to buckle.
She hit the stairs nearly running.
SOMETHING WAS WRONG, but he’d have to catch her to find out. Charging down the stairs after her, Cade saw her slip into the intended room and shut the door in his face.
What the hell? This wasn’t the reaction he’d hoped for. “Sophie, what’s going on?”
No response.
He turned the knob and stepped into darkness. “Sophie?”
In the light from the hallway, he spotted her, slumped against the wall, the photograph on her lap, her graceful fingers stroking the frame. “Does that mean you like it?” he finally asked.
She glanced at him, then away—but not before he saw the tears in her eyes. Crying women were scary, that’s all there was to it. A smart man stayed away from them because no man on earth ever knew the right thing to say.
But this was Sophie the warrior, and she had her shoulders bowed, her whole posture that of unutterable weariness and defeat.
He must not be that smart because he couldn’t bring himself to leave her. He crossed the floor and sank down beside her. You are so gone, Jesse had said. Looks that way, doesn’t it, big brother? Gingerly, Cade wrapped one arm around those slender shoulders that bore too many burdens.
Sophie shuddered at his touch, but when he started to release her, she suddenly buried her face in his shoulder.
“Go ahead,” he murmured, stroking her hair with his free hand as he tucked her more firmly against him. “Let it out, Sophie. You don’t have to be so damn strong all the time.”
“Crying is pointless.” She tensed and tried to scramble to her feet.
He tightened his grip. She wasn’t going anywhere until he got to the bottom of her troubled state. “Sit still and tell me what’s wrong.” He frowned. “Is it the photographs?” He didn’t think so, but maybe…
“No!” She bolted up straight and faced him at last. “Oh, no, Cade. They’re absolutely stunning. They’re perfect. And now that I know that’s why you left without saying a word....”
He glanced away quickly.
“That’s not why.” Her voice went flat, and she visibly stiffened, drawing back from him.
“Stop.” He held her in place and met her gaze squarely. “It is…and it isn’t.”
“You had second thoughts. About last night, I mean.”
“No— Yes— I mean…didn’t you?”
A thousand emotions tripped over her features too swiftly for him to identify. “Of course,” she said coolly, staring past his shoulder. “It was…intense. Unexpected.”
“Yeah,” he responded, relieved that she understood.
“But that doesn’t have to be a problem,” she continued. “We simply won’t make the mistake again.”
His relief evaporated. “What mistake?”
Her green eyes flicked over him impersonally. “No more sex.”
“Hold your horses, Queenie.” That wasn’t what he intended at all. “We are definitely making love again.” In the next few minutes, if he had anything to say about it.
“Having sex,” she corrected.
Oh, man, had he ever screwed up. When a woman got that icy tone in her voice
, nothing good ever came of it. “Call it what you want, but you can’t tell me you didn’t love it. I was in that bed with you, Sophie. I know how it felt. There’s something between us.”
“There might have been—” she wrenched herself out of his arms and rose “—but that was last night. And we’ve both had second thoughts, remember?”
He stood to get on equal footing. “That’s not what I meant.”
“Then what did you mean?”
She was withdrawing from him, and he scrambled to make up ground. “Look, I’m sorry. I should have left a note, I know, but…”
Wrong move. She recoiled as if struck.
“I don’t need to be coddled. I don’t fall for every guy that I sleep with. I don’t get emotionally involved after every roll in the hay. I’m responsible for my own heart and my own body and last night was—”
“Incredible,” he said over her outrage. “Unforgettable.”
She halted in midsentence and simply stared at him.
“Sophie, I didn’t leave because I didn’t want to keep making love to you all night and a whole lot longer. I was trying to save you.”
“From what? Your deadly charm? Your skill in the sack?”
He ignored the sarcasm. “From me. And the mess in my head.”
Her mouth snapped shut. She studied him carefully. “What mess?”
“I was this close—” he gestured with his fingers “—to taking advantage of you.”
She snorted. “With sex? Please. What happened was completely mutual.”
“No.” He shook his head. “With my camera lens. I—” Oh, God. How could he explain? “I… It doesn’t matter.”
Some of the torment he’d been wrestling with since last night must have shown on his face, because her expression softened and she reached out to him.
“It does matter. Talk to me, Cade. You don’t have to be so damn strong all the time.”
HE SMILED AT HEARING his own words used against him, but he turned away. For a moment, Sophie thought Cade might leave rather than talk about whatever was troubling him.
But finally he spoke, his voice very quiet, his face averted. “I haven’t been able to pick up a camera since the accident.” Another long pause. He looked so sad, and that sorrow kept her from pushing him. “It’s not like I haven’t tried, but when I do, all I can think about is Jaime and how—” He moved to the window and looked out into the darkness, his broad shoulders tensed. “I killed my friend.”
“What? Cade, it was an accident.”
He whipped around to face her, his eyes hard, his voice fierce. “I took stupid chances, unnecessary risks. All for my precious vision. Jaime was as much a victim of my ambition as of that mountain. A casualty of my arrogance in believing that I was extraordinary, that the rules didn’t apply to me.”
“Did you force him to go along?”
“Yes.”
“How?”
“Because he was my friend!” The cry exploded from deep within him. “He never said no to me. He knew I wanted him along because he was the best, and we worked together seamlessly. The shots were better when he was with me because he instantly got what I was after. He anticipated what I needed, how to set everything up so I could focus solely on what was in front of me because…” His voice grew hoarse. “Because he always had my back.”
“You didn’t force him. He wanted to be on those expeditions.”
“Of course he did—he loved the work. But he had a family—three little kids and a wife who are now alone.” Anguish was in his eyes. “It should have been me.”
The last traces of her fury at him vanished. She longed to go to him, to soothe, to comfort.
But he wasn’t ready for that yet. “So you don’t use your camera anymore.”
He didn’t answer.
“Because that’s how you honor him?”
His head snapped back. “Don’t you dare mock me. You can’t begin to understand.”
She gasped but refused to retaliate.
“I’m sorry. That was rude…and wrong. You’ve lost a lot more than I have.”
She took a deep breath. “It’s hard to go on without them.”
He watched her, eyes shuttered.
“Everyone goes through these recriminations—I should have been there. It was supposed to be me. For a long time, I blamed myself because I was supposed to pick up Sarah, but I was running late that day. And I thought my parents wouldn’t have drowned if I’d been there.”
“You know better,” he said.
“So do you,” she responded. “Does it make the pain go away?”
He shook his head.
“Will it help if I tell you it will lessen with time?” She met his intense gaze. “It never vanishes completely, but you start remembering the good times more than the loss. And, Cade, you are extraordinary. Jaime wouldn’t want your gift squandered.”
“Doesn’t really matter. It’s too late.”
“What do you mean?”
“I can’t see anymore. I used to be able to sense the perfect shot, but now…it’s like I’ve gone blind.” His expression was haunted. “Then last night…I could see you. In that way, the special way I’ve taken for granted all my life. You were asleep and you were so beautiful. The lines of your body, the contours of your face… I sat on the chair and just watched you, and I wanted…” He swallowed hard. “I wanted my camera.” He approached her. “I wanted to capture that image of beauty so badly, and I was halfway down the stairs to get my camera, but…” He lifted his hands. “I knew I had no right. That it would be a violation of the worst kind.”
She couldn’t breathe, imagining Cade focused on her asleep and naked.
“You’re too vulnerable, Sophie. You’re so damn strong and you’re brave and fierce, but…I could hurt you. So all I could think to do was to make myself leave, for your sake.”
He was terrified that he’d lost the primary element of his existence, the thing that defined him, and yet he’d sacrificed the chance to get it back. For her. She reached for his hand and clasped it. “Thank you.” She squeezed. “And I’m sorry. Maybe…” She should offer to let him photograph her if it would help, but…
He squeezed back. “I won’t ask.” He found a small smile. “At least not when you’re naked.”
She gestured toward the framed art. “Cade, your talent is so immense. And it’s not limited to your photography, whatever you think. Just look what you’ve done with this place. But I know your gift isn’t gone for good.”
“I hope you’re right. I owe my publisher a book or they won’t fund my next trip, but I haven’t even been able to go through my files. I see Jaime in every one.”
“Would it help if I went through them with you?”
He looked at her oddly. “You would do that, wouldn’t you?” He shook his head. “I don’t know. Maybe.” Then his gaze lit. “But today on the way back from Jesse’s, I had an idea. My publishers want me to change the narrative of the book to be about the accident, but damned if I’ll go along with that. Then a solution occurred to me—I want Jaime to frame the story. I’ll use photos never before published, both of him and from our trips together, so that his children will get to know the Jaime I did. And I want my share of the proceeds to go to them for college or whatever they need.”
“That’s a beautiful idea.”
As he talked about it, his whole bearing became lighter, his expression no longer dark with sorrow. “You think so?” He shrugged. “Let’s hope my publisher agrees. I told my agent no way in hell am I spilling my guts about the accident, but this…this feels right. I’ll do a damn good job of it, too. Jaime deserves no less.”
Jenna would be so happy—all his family would—to see Cade enthusiastic at last. “I kno
w you will.”
He grinned, and this was a Cade she’d never seen, a man from whom a shadow had been stripped, a burden lifted.
“I couldn’t figure out what to do with my life, so I’ve been hiding out here, working with you. But now…you make me feel like there’s hope, Sophie.” He drew her close against his hard-muscled body, and a part of her wanted to return to last night’s glory. To leap in and take. But…
I’ve been hiding out here. A reminder that he was only temporary, that he had a career that would take him away sooner rather than later. She was no longer sure she could keep her heart whole if they let whatever this was between them go any further. She had to step back from that cliff. “I’m happy for you.” Then she took a physical step back. “Let’s go see how the other one looks. They really are beautiful, Cade. I’m not sure how I’m going to pay you for them after what happened today, maybe some installment plan—”
“No freaking way.” Before she could slip out the door, he captured her and pulled her into the room again. “I said they were a gift.”
Then he frowned. “What do you mean, what happened today?”
“Nothing…never mind.”
He cupped her cheek. “You’re a lousy liar, Queenie.”
She sighed then relented because she knew he wouldn’t leave without hearing the full story.
And because it was such a luxury to have someone to confide in. She’d take it while she could…because all too soon, he would be gone.
AS SHE EXPLAINED ABOUT the landscaper who’d taken a powder at the eleventh hour—and taken her money with him—Cade was ready to storm out and hunt the man down.
“I feel like the biggest fool,” she said.
He turned his attention where it belonged, on her feelings, not his. “No one can factor in dishonesty.”
“But I have excellent people sense—I’m considered practically a prodigy for my instincts. At least I used to be.” Her mouth twisted. “So how did I miss that he would do this?”
“Human nature is as changeable as the weather. And people wear masks. There’s no way to know what his problems were. Why he needed money he hadn’t earned.” Nonetheless, Cade itched to get his hands on the guy who’d made Sophie feel so hopeless, to find the bastard and pound the living daylights out of him.
A Texas Chance Page 14
