by Mercy Levy
“I was a fool and I can’t stand the fact that I put tears in your beautiful blue eyes. The sky on a perfect day doesn’t come close to their color. I saw you humming and wearing her overalls and I was overwhelmed by memories of Grace. I can’t help it Lexi; talking about JJ last night and then seeing you this morning was too much.”
“I’m so sorry John.”
“No need to be sorry Lexi. You do realize that we just had our first misunderstanding,” John said as her wiped a tear from Lexi’s cheek.
“We did and I’m sure we’ll have many more but that’s expected in a marriage.”
“You’re heaven sent Lexi Stark.” John leaned in and kissed his wife gently on the lips.
John and Lexi laid in the morning sun until they heard John’s stomach growl and realized it was time to head inside. “John, I’m afraid I’ve ruined another meal. I’m going to make you a fabulous meal one of these days.”
“You have forever to learn your way around the kitchen and I’m a very patient man. I must tell you that you look lovely in the overalls and Grace would be happy that you’re putting them to good use.”
“Thank you John,” Lexi gave him a peck on the cheek as they walked back. The house looked straighter every time Lexi looked at it and it was starting to feel like home.
****
The barn was intimidating the first time that Lexi walked in. John led her by the hand by the horse stall and to the three cows that she was going to learn to milk.
“These are the girls Lexi. We’d probably do with two but since it’s just the two of us we’d do fine with just one cow.”
“John you made it clear when you were looking for a mail order bride, that you wanted to have children. Is that something you want with me? We haven’t even been intimate so maybe I’m jumping the gun. Sometime I say words without fully thinking about them”
John smiled widely. “I’m glad you brought it up. I thought I wanted one or two children but with you, I want a dozen.”
Lexi looked at John. “A dozen – whew, that’s a tall order to fill but with you, I think that can be done.”
John scooped up Lexi. “I never saw this coming but I love you Lexi. I love my wife – I love you but please don’t feel pressured to return the sentiment.”
Lexi was about to return the sentiment when Doctor Remsen showed up. His timing couldn’t have been worse because for the first time in her life, Lexi was going to say I love you to someone besides her parents or siblings.
“Sorry to interrupt but I was in the area and I wanted to make sure Mrs. Stark was feeling better,” Dr. Remsen said.
“I’ve never felt better Doctor. I think my body has grown accustomed to the warm dry climate. How is that sweet baby of yours?” Lexi asked.
“Ezekiel is doing well with his mother. All she wanted from the day we were married was a child and I’m thrilled that she finally got her wish. I hope that talk of an infant doesn’t cause you grief John.”
“I’d be lying if I said I was completely over my grief but I have found renewed hope in my sweet wife Lexi. She told me about your boy Ezekiel and that he’s quite the crier like my JJ was the only time I heard him cry.”
“Your son was stillborn John and he never made so much as a whimper when he was born. It was one of the reasons I kept you out of the room because seeing his lifeless body would have been too much to take. Your brain was playing tricks on you and you heard what you wanted to hear.”
Lexi was sure something wasn’t right and she knew it was something she had to discuss with John after the doctor left. If her suspicions were right, then John’s life would change for the better and that would be the best gift she could give him.
“Enough talk of the past,” Lexi said. “We appreciate your visit, Dr. Remsen but there are only so many hours in the day and if we don’t tend to these cows, they’ll explode.”
John looked at Lexi with a questioning look and she waved him off. “Thanks for thinking of us Doc, we’ll be in touch soon.” When the doctor was out of sight, Lexi grabbed John’s arm and led him to the hay loft.
“What’s going on Lexi. It doesn’t seem like you to be rude to the doctor, especially since he made a special trip out here.”
“Relax John because what I’m about to tell you seems bizarre at first but I think it’s true.”
Chapter Eight
John sat up straight as if he were about to hear bad news. “I’m confused Lexi. Are you going back to Boston; is that what you have to tell me. If you are about to break my heart do it quickly.”
Lexi punched John jokingly on the arm. “I believe your son JJ is alive. I know and I’m sure Dr. Remsen knows that I know. Pick your jaw up John because I’m serious and this is something I’ve felt since I looked into Ezekiel’s green eyes. I didn’t want to give you false hope so I waited until know, when I know it’s true.”
John swallowed hard. “My son is dead Lexi and to lead me on is cruel. You’d better explain yourself quick.”
“You heard your baby cry because he was alive but he was passed on to Mrs. Remsen to claim as her own. We both agree that she’s too old to carry a child and to further my point, Dr. Remsen came here today to keep me from visiting him. Will you at least consider that I’m right. I wouldn’t say any of this unless I believed it was a real possibility.”
“From the moment I laid eyes on you, I realized you were sent. Maybe it was by Grace or by God himself. A simple cowboy isn’t meant to believe so deeply but you make me believe in the most absurd stories. When you say it Lexi, I believe you.” John was shaking.
“The hard part is yet to come because we can’t just march into the Remsen home and claim the child. They will think of me has some deranged mail order bride that got herself and husband and decided she wanted a baby too. I had reservations about telling you because we have to put emotion aside; if the Remsen’s were clever enough to steal a child, then they darn well covered their tracks.”
John composed himself by splashing cold water on his face. “Think if it was you and your child was being raised my someone else under your nose. I’m happy but I’m madder than heck. Do you have a plan?”
“I know that we have to be careful because they’ll run if they have the opportunity. We’ll see them at church on Sunday and you can see Ezekiel with your own eyes and we’ll know for sure. You have to sit tight for a moment and I have something I must confess.”
“What Lexi? I’ll have a heart attack if you come up with any more surprises.” John took off his hat and raked his fingers through his thick black hair.
“It’s nothing compared to what I just told you but I hate keeping secrets because it’s no way to start a marriage. When I was fixing my bed this morning, I inched it closer to yours because I wanted to be able to reach over and kiss my husband goodnight.”
John giggled. “I did the same silly because I don’t think there should be distance between a husband and wife. Nice attempt to distract me from the important issue that my son may actually be alive.”
John and Lexi had chicken and dumplings again for dinner as they spoke about the prospects of having a child in the home. Lexi assured John that she would treat JJ as if he were then product of her own body and he would know that his mother was beautiful and brave. He would never be hidden away as a secret but celebrated as a miracle,
“You can’t know how tempted I am to run over to the Remsen’s now, Lexi. Tell me more about how he looks and how he moves. If he’s really is my son, I have a great deal to learn about his first six months. At 6-months, he can’t be walking and when does he say his first words? Will he always hold it against me that I didn’t find him sooner? Will I confuse my son when I call him JJ and not Ezekiel?”
“I don’t have an answer for all of your questions; we’ll just have to wait and see. Going through this conflict regardless of how stressful will strengthen our marriage. I’m thrilled to be able to give you this gift,” Lexi said as she tasted another one of Maxine’s scrump
tious dumplings.
“This great news has made everything about me, Lexi. I know nothing of the life or who you left behind in Boston.”
“This is my life now John.” Lexi tried to avoid the question. “Would you like another glass of milk?”
“Nice try avoiding talking about Boston but I’m fine with the milk.” John smiled.
“I think about my parents every day John and I’m surprised that they haven’t tried to find me but I suppose that’s a good thing. I’m the youngest of three girls and they must have been tired of parenting by the time I came along.”
“I doubt that’s true Lexi because I can’t imagine anyone tiring of you. Did they approve of your move west?”
“I didn’t give them the opportunity to voice their opinions. I left a note and snuck away with every intention of letting them know eventually. Now I’m afraid to contact them and I think they’d be happier if I were dead.”
John shook his head. “The prospect that my son is alive fills me with a feeling of joy that I can’t explain. Isn’t that same feeling something your parents deserve to feel?”
“You make too much sense John Stark. I’m ready to retire because we have a busy day tomorrow and the next several days until church on Sunday. It will be the day you may meet your son for the first time.”
“You go in first and I’ll join you as soon as possible.”
Lexi left John alone because he had a lot of thinking to do. She had just dropped a massive bombshell and she hoped her telling wasn’t premature. Lexi cracked open the bedroom door and saw the two beds flush against each other. Goosebumps appeared down her spine when she thought about the night ahead because she had never laid next to a man before. Lexi and John had been through a lot already and she hoped that laid a solid ground for the night ahead.
Chapter Nine
After breakfast, which Lexi successfully made the Starks rode their buggy to church. It seemed like an eternity for John since Lexi shared the news but in other ways the time flew by. They were happy living as husband and wife and looked forward to sharing their happiness with the rest of the Garvey community. It was an arrangement that was made by mail but turned out as true love. They walked up the wood steps to the church and slid onto a bench next to Jane and Jeb.
“Wow Jane – you’ve popped. It’s surprising that things changed so quickly and I can’t wait to be Aunt Lexi,” Lexi patted her sister-in-law’s growing belly.
“I know it’s either going to be an enormous baby or I have a couple growing inside. Dr. Remsen that I don’t need bed rest as long as I avoid excitement.”
“Oh, well. I’m afraid you’re in for some excitement, Jane, and it can’t be helped.”
“Are you and John not working out? I’d hate to see you head back to Boston because I love having you as a sister.”
“Oh, I can’t get into it now because father is about to begin,” Lexi said as she heard the Remsen’s arrive with the baby screaming.
Services were inspiring and Lexi didn’t realize how much she missed the church since leaving Boston. It was a reminder that no matter where she went, God followed. She hoped the Remsen’s were equally inspired. She looked towards John and saw in in a peaceful state because he knew that what was coming would be heartbreaking to Dr. and Mrs. Remsen. The reverend walked out first and stood at the door to say hello to the congregants.
“You must be the new Mrs. Stark; welcome to Garvey. John came to me earlier in the week as he asked about having a Christian ceremony to bless your vows,” Pastor Dale said.
“I wasn’t aware he had come to you, but it’s definitely something we agree upon. Just because I’m a mail order bride, doesn’t mean I don’t want our union blessed.”
As Lexi was chatting with Pastor Dale she saw John walking towards the Remsen Family. She excused herself and walked after her husband. By the time she reached them it was obvious they were having a civil but emotional conversation. Tears were streaming down Mr. Remsen’s face as she spoke.
“I thought there was no harm as Ezekiel was going to be going to be facing life without a mother. I had so much love to give and it seemed like a perfect plan. I asked my husband of Grace’s chances of survival and those of the baby and I was overcome with greed. Then I met you Mrs. Stark and I knew it was only a matter of time until the truth was uncovered.”
Doctor Remsen stood silent as his wife poured her heart out.
“I knew as you were approaching me John. I’m ashamed and I know this means the law will come. I’m guilty of trying to provide my wife with what she desired and couldn’t have.”
John was about to speak but Lexi spoke up instead. “I came to Texas for a reason and now I know that I was meant to fall in love and reunite a father with his son. I didn’t come to send desperate people to jail. I know that you’ll be paying for your misdeeds every day that you wake up without Ezekiel. Enough damage has been done and all you have to do is return the child to his father,” Lexi said expecting that drama or wailing would follow but what came was a peaceful and poignant moment.
John took the beautiful boy with striking green eyes into his arms and it was apparent that the boy was where he needed to be. Lexi looked behind her and saw pastor Dale looking on approvingly. He nodded his head towards a grief stricken Mrs. Remsen and Lexi realized that she had probably sought counsel with the Pastor. Hours were spent by the church that day as apologies and forgiveness flew like wildfire. Lexi had to prod John and his son when it was time to head home.
“I guess this is when I finally get a chance to hold JJ?”
“Only because I will have my hands on the reins. I’ve decided with the Remsen’s that they’ll be like an aunt and uncle to JJ. I wasn’t equipped to take care of my son until now. In an odd sort of way, I’m thankful to them and to you my beautiful wife for making all my dreams come true.”
“I just put the pieces together. I’m sure Grace put everything into action because I can feel her hand guiding me. I was thinking it’s a good thing we have three cows because JJ is going to need plenty of milk.”
John couldn’t stop smiling on the way home and they agreed that night that they’d walk to Grace’s gravesite and say a prayer in her honor. It was everything and more that John dreamed of but in the back of her mind, Lexi still missed her parents.
Chapter Ten
The rooster crowed and Lexi turned over in bed as did JJ in the crib nearby. John was the only one up at dawn, to begin his day in the field. Lexi was a mother and never considered for a moment that JJ wasn’t her biological child. Days of him sleeping in the crib were numbered as he was almost ready to climb out. His cousin Charity was still an infant but eventually the would be climbing trees together. Jane and Jeb had a healthy daughter and the family was growing. Lexi never imagined that being a mail order bride would turn out this way because it was supposed to be just a way to escape Boston. When JJ decided it was time, Lexi picked him up and carried him down for breakfast. His first word was Ma, which Lexi welcomed because she knew Grace would have approved. John would be long gone by now.
“What are you still doing here?” Lexi asked when she saw John sipping coffee at the table.
“I’m welcoming our guests, who’ve come for our official wedding ceremony. Surprise!”
Lexi whipped her head around and saw her parent’s standing by the door way. They had their arms open waiting for a hug from their daughter and their new grandson.
“What in the world is happening? How did you find me in Garvey Texas?” Lexi asked, although it was hard to speak since she was smiling so broadly.
“We found out shortly after you left. It was a huge surprise because we knew you were unhappy with Barnabas. We contacted Mr. Burgess who assured us that you were well cared for and he said that you were one of the most capable mail order brides he’s ever come across. Our first instinct was to run after you but we thought about it and then we received a telegraph from John. He told us that we have a grandson, who we had to meet,” Mrs
. Winter tugged at JJ’s cheeks.
Mr. Winter spoke up, which was rare. “I knew you were different from the other girls – in a good way. I had no doubt that you’d find your way in the world. To be honest, I’m jealous because life on the ranch seems blissful.”
“It is Daddy and I couldn’t have imagined a happier ending.”
“There won’t be a happy ending if we don’t get you upstairs and into your wedding dress.”
“I don’t have a wedding dress,” Lexi said.
“You do now my sweet daughter.” Mrs. Winter showed Lexi a box that held her lace dress. A dress that had been worn by her mother and each one of her sisters.
****
Lexi walked down the aisle more happy and confident than she ever thought possible. Everything had been arranged by Maxine, Mrs. Remsen and her mother. It was a real wedding that she had wished for. With her dark hair flowing behind her heading towards the man she loved, Lexi felt a twinge in her stomach. She patted her belly and smiled. The vows were said and JJ cried out as if he knew that things were exactly as they should be. Lexi whispered in John’s ear after their kiss.
“I love you sweetheart and guess what?”
“I can’t imagine.”
“I’m pregnant and we’re two steps closer to a dozen,” Lexi said as she took John’s hand and placed it on her belly.
It was the best mail order bride arrangement that Garvey had ever seen.
THE END
Cherry
“Matrimonial News- September 23, 1859”
"Wanted: For a cattleman of 26 years, 5 feet 10 inches tall, desires the acquaintance of a young intelligent and educated lady possessed of some means who will love, is honest, hardworking, of an adventurous disposition, no more than 22, who will follow where I lead, and could make home wherever our travels take us. Responses are anonymous. Please respond to Matrimonial News, care of Goliad County, TX”
