She squeezed her eyes shut. Could she do it? Could she have sex in the man’s pantry while their children slept in the same house? Could she have sex with another man—quick, completely commitment-free sex—with someone who wasn’t her husband? Was she ready to take this step, ready to share her body with someone else?
“Stop,” Eddie said on barely a breath of a sound.
Her eyes flew open. “What?”
His lips tickled her ear as he spoke. “Stop thinking.”
And then his hand was between her legs, warm and sure and insistent. It felt good. So, so good. She bit her lip to hold back a whimper. He stroked her, kept that other hand on her hair, his grip just tight enough to have a bit of bite to it, a bit of excitement. Bending his head, he took one nipple in his mouth and sucked hard. Her back arched, her hips bucked violently, urging him on, silently begging him to go faster, to touch her harder.
Her body heated as pressure built but she held it back, shook her head as if that alone could stop it. She wasn’t sure why she fought it when she wanted it so badly, only that she had to, she couldn’t succumb to it fully, not if she wanted to keep her self-respect. Her heart safe.
But then he tugged her head back farther and gently bit down on her nipple. The world exploded into a million pieces. Her orgasm washed over her with wave after wave of intense pleasure that rocked her to her core, leaving her breathless and boneless and shuddering with the strength of her climax.
Finally her body came down, her breathing and pulse slowed. Eddie straightened and pulled her bra back into place, his expression hard. Fierce. He tugged her shirt down and then gently, almost reverently, combed his fingers through her hair.
Tears stung her eyes and she ducked her head so he couldn’t see, but she wondered if he sensed them because he backed up a step, then another.
“I’ll check on the kids,” he said softly before slipping out and shutting the door behind him.
Harper slumped against the shelves, her hands shaking as she buttoned and zipped her jeans. She wanted to crawl next to the canned goods and hide out in here for, oh, the next few days if possible. But avoidance wasn’t an option. She did wait the few minutes it took to get her heart rate and breathing back to normal before opening the door.
Eddie stood by the sink, held up a glass of water. “Kids are still sleeping.”
She accepted the water and drank deeply. Avoided his eyes but she couldn’t ignore what had happened, not when her body still tingled with the aftershocks of her orgasm. Not when the evidence of what they’d done—and what they hadn’t—was so visible behind the zipper of his jeans.
Lowering the glass, she inhaled deeply. “Why did you do that?”
She winced. That hadn’t been the exact question she’d meant to ask. She’d meant to ask if he was okay. To explain that, despite what had happened in the pantry—what she’d allowed to happen, what she’d thoroughly, obviously enjoyed—she wasn’t ready to sleep with him.
“I thought you might be thirsty.”
She frowned, shook her head. “No. Not that.” She licked her lips. Tipped her head toward the pantry—she’d never be able to look at canned goods the same way again. “That.”
He stepped closer. Lowered his voice. “Why did I touch you? Why did I kiss you? Why did I make you come?”
Hearing him say it, his words washing over her like a caress, had her body responding again. “Yes.”
“I find you very attractive. I enjoy touching you. Kissing you. I want you, Harper.”
Her heart soared but panic managed to find its way in and ground it again. “I’m not ready,” she blurted, setting the glass down with a soft clink. “For...sex.”
He nodded. “I know. I can wait.”
She glanced at the proof that he hadn’t been unaffected by their pantry encounter. “I’m sorry.”
“I think I’ll live.”
And that reminder that he would, that her husband hadn’t, almost knocked
her to her knees. She locked them. It was just an expression, one people said every day, one she herself said. She’d only taken it that way because her feelings were messed up, her head spinning.
She tried to smile. “Good to know.”
“I’ll wait for you, Harper,” he said, all sexy and honest and intense. Then he kissed her, a long, lingering kiss.
She couldn’t help it, she threw her arms around him and hugged him tight. He returned her embrace, didn’t seem to mind that she was a crazy woman— wanton and easy one minute, needy and emotional the next.
He’d wait for her. Because he was attracted to her. Because he wanted to have sex with her. She was a grown woman, had been married, had a daughter. She’d had relationships other than Beau. She understood that sometimes the physical was just that. Physical. That it was all there was for some people.
But she’d had more, so much more with Beau, and she wanted that again. When the time was right. For now, she didn’t know what she wanted. So she’d do what Eddie was doing. She’d wait. She’d spend time with him and see what developed between them.
“Mommy!”
Cass’s cry had Harper hurrying into the living room. Her daughter was awake, sitting on the couch, her cheeks flushed, her hair wild, tears coursing down her face.
“It’s okay,” Harper said, picking her up and holding her close. Rocking her back and forth. “That must’ve been scary, huh? Waking up in a strange place. Shh...shh...”
Cassidy’s cries subsided to the occasional hiccup and she settled her head on Harper’s shoulder.
“Hey, there,” Eddie said to Cass in a low, soothing voice. “Want some apple juice?”
“Juice,” Cass said in a sleep-roughened voice.
Eddie went back into the kitchen. When he returned he handed Cass a sippy cup. She took it and drank deeply. When she was done, she grinned at him. “I want you.”
He held out his arms as if it was the most natural thing in the world to hold someone else’s daughter.
A noise had them turning. Max bolted to a sitting position, his hair damp with sweat, his T-shirt wrinkled, sleep marks on his left cheek.
“You feeling better?” Eddie asked.
Max nodded, stared at his blanket. “I’m sorry I was bad. I’m sorry I said I was gonna run away.”
Eddie shifted Cass to his other hip then sat next to his son. “I’m sorry I yelled.”
Max slid him a sly look. “And that you made me go to my room?”
“No, but in this one case, we can forget about that. But no TV or video games for the rest of the week for taking my phone without permission and for calling Mrs. Kavanagh.”
Max hung his head. “Okay.”
“Is there something you want to tell Mrs. Kavanagh?”
“I’m sorry I called you and said it was an emergency,” Max whispered.
“That’s okay. You know I’m always here for you, Max.” She was starting to become dangerously attached to him—and his father. Not a good idea considering she was Max’s teacher.
Quite a few of her coworkers had kids in their classrooms that they knew personally—children of friends, nieces or nephews—but Harper liked to keep her personal and professional life separate so one didn’t cause problems for the other.
Looked as if it was too late for that.
“Why don’t Cassidy and I get out of your way?” she said, remembering how it had felt to have Eddie’s hands on her. She was confused and vulnerable, and while she didn’t usually mind letting her emotions get the best of her, she had a feeling this was one of those instances where it would be better for her to keep her head. “I’m sure you have a lot you need to do.”
She reached for Cassidy, who screamed and buried her face into the side of Eddie’s neck, clinging to him like he was about to join the French Foreign Legion and this was their last goodbye.
“Cass, please,” she muttered, “have some pride.”
Eddie stood, her daughter in his arm, his free hand on his son’s head. �
��Stay.”
“Excuse me?”
“For dinner,” he added. “I’m making lasagna.”
Max’s eyes widened. “You are?” He sent one of his shy grins at Harper. “That’s my favorite.”
“Brownie sundaes for dessert,” Eddie said. “But we could use some help putting it all together.”
He didn’t, she knew that. He didn’t need help with anything, didn’t want to need help. But he’d asked her to stay, had asked for her assistance, and even though it was for something small like getting dinner together, it meant something to her.
“We’d love to stay,” Harper said, knowing she was somehow setting herself up for a big fall, but unable to stop from making that climb anyway.
15
“I KNEW YOU and Harper knew each other,” James said to Eddie the next day while they stood toward the back of Harper’s living room, the football game flashing on her big-screen TV, “but I hadn’t realized you had a thing.”
Eddie sipped his beer. “We don’t.”
“No?” James asked with a raised brow. “You sure? Because it seems to me when a man and a woman—a single man and an attractive, smart, funny single woman—sit together at a hockey game and the single man shows up at the attractive, smart, funny single woman’s house to watch a football game, there’s something going on other than mere acquaintances.”
“You’re here,” Eddie pointed out. “You going to tell me you and Harper have something going on?”
“I’m here because I’m with Sadie and because Sadie and Harper are cousins. Sorry, man, you have no excuse.”
“I don’t need one.”
But he felt like he did. He felt as if everyone was watching him, wondering why he and Max were there, trying to figure out if there was something going on between him and Harper. He didn’t even know the answer to that question. All he knew was that he’d had a really good time with her and Cassidy yesterday. He’d taught Harper how to make Pops’s lasagna, and she and the kids had made brownies. It’d been nice. Normal. Exactly the type of situation he’d hoped for when he’d married Lena, the kind of Saturday night he’d dreamed of having with his family.
It’d taken a good hour but Harper had finally relaxed. After what had happened between them in the pantry, she’d wanted to analyze it, discuss it. Not everything needed to be spelled out, did it? He found her attractive. He wanted to touch her so he did. He’d made his intentions clear. He wanted her in his bed. He’d be patient and wait, but he hoped she didn’t keep him waiting too long.
James, obviously tired of not getting a rise out of Eddie, wandered over to talk to Harper’s father. Her house was packed with people. When she did a Game Day—as she called it—she did it big. Her parents, her mother-in-law, Sadie and James, Sadie’s parents and younger sister, Charlotte, coworkers and friends of hers and Beau’s. Eddie felt like an outsider, like all the pieces were round and he and Max were square.
This was a far cry from how he preferred to spend his weekends. He hated parties, hated trying to think of conversational topics, so he stayed in the back of the room, kept his gaze on the television screen. The Steelers got an interception and a cheer rose from the crowd. He shouldn’t be here, but he hadn’t been able to refuse her invitation, not after she’d reissued it again last night before she’d left his house, seeming as if she’d really wanted him there.
Now he wasn’t so sure. Yeah, she’d been pleasant when they’d arrived. Pleasant. Polite. Too polite. Too distant for his taste. Not that he needed everyone to know his personal business but after she’d taken their jackets and told them to help themselves to something to eat and drink, she’d barely said two words to Eddie. Could hardly even look him in the eye.
It hadn’t even been a full day since he’d had her full attention but he wanted it again.
He missed her.
It was stupid, and it pissed him off, but he wouldn’t deny it.
He caught sight of her as she made her way back into the kitchen. She laughed at something someone said, stopped to speak to a middle-aged man, then continued on her way. Eddie followed, stepping into the kitchen as she put dirty dishes into the sink.
He came up behind her and pressed a kiss to the side of her neck.
Squealing, she jumped and whirled around, the silverware in her hand arcing in the air before hitting the floor with a loud clang.
“Eddie! God,” she gasped, slapping her hand over her neck as if he’d been a vampire and had taken a huge, bloody bite. “You scared me.”
Obviously. He shoved his hands into his pockets, viciously cursing the blush heating his cheeks. “Sorry.”
She smiled but it looked pained. “No. That’s okay. I guess I’m just...jumpy.”
He glanced at the doorway. Still empty. “Maybe we could try that again.” He leaned down to kiss her.
She leapt back. “Did you need something?”
You.
He frowned. He didn’t need her. He wanted her. Big difference. Need came with strings and expectations. Expectations came with the possibility of failure.
“A beer?” she continued, already heading toward the fridge. “Or maybe something else to eat?”
He shook his head and she shut the refrigerator door.
“Where’s Max?” she asked.
“Playing with Cass.”
Max, like his father, preferred the known over the unknown and he wasn’t friends with any of the other kids who were there.
“Good,” she said. “That’s...good. Are you enjoying the game?”
“No.”
She frowned, chewed on her lower lip. She looked pretty today, her hair pinned back on the sides, her Steelers jersey hiding her curves. He’d come because she’d asked. He’d come because he hadn’t been able to stay away, just like he’d asked her to stay for dinner last night because he hadn’t wanted to let her go. Not yet. If he wasn’t careful, she’d have him wrapped around her finger, doing everything she wanted, trying to be who she wanted him to be.
He was starting to wonder if that’d be a bad thing.
He moved closer so that only a foot separated them. “I didn’t come for the game or the food.”
“Don’t tell me,” she joked lightly. “You came for the free beer.”
“I came for you.”
Her expression softened and her lips curved into one of her real smiles, one filled with warmth. “That’s—”
“The Ravens just scored,” her cousin Charlotte said as she came into the kitchen carrying an empty tray. She glanced curiously between them. “And we need more nachos before things get ugly out there.”
“No problem,” Harper said, her voice weird. Guilty. She grabbed the tray and practically ran to the other side of the kitchen. What the hell was that about?
“You okay?” Charlotte asked. Long and lean, her bright red hair and freckles reminded Eddie of the old rag doll Maddie had as a kid.
“I’m good,” Harper said. “Just...upset Baltimore has the lead back.”
Sadie came in, looking like a blonde fairy playing hippie in a long, swirling skirt and puffy shirt, followed by Joan Crosby.
A man couldn’t escape people in this house. Now, because he’d wanted a few minutes alone with Harper, he was surrounded by women. Joan smiled at Harper. “Anything I can do in here?”
“I’m just going to mix up another batch of margaritas,” Harper said, setting the cheese-laden tortilla chips in the oven.
“I’ve got it,” Sadie said, pulling ingredients from the fridge.
Harper linked her hands together at her waist. “I hope Steve’s feeling better,” she blurted to Joan before looking at Eddie. “Joan’s husband is under the weather.”
Since he had no comment about that, he kept silent.
“Can I make him up a plate for you to take home?” Harper continued.
“That’s sweet, but I’m sure he’d rather just stick with his ginger ale and saltines,” Joan said, not meeting Harper’s eyes.
Somethin
g’s going on there, Eddie thought. But it wasn’t his place to point out to Harper that her mother-in-law was being less than honest.
Joan glanced at Eddie, her smile dimming. “Eddie, I hadn’t realized you and Harper were friends.”
“We went to school together,” Harper said quickly.
“Of course. That’s...nice,” Joan said, making it sound anything but. “I hope neither of you mind my saying so, but I wonder if it’d be best to keep more...distance between the two of you. At least until Max is no longer in Harper’s class. I think we all know how complicated these situations can be.”
“Actually,” Sadie said, “Eddie and Max came with me and James.”
Harper sent her cousin a grateful look. Eddie narrowed his eyes.
Son of a bitch.
This, coming here, was a mistake. She didn’t want him here, didn’t want anyone to know there was something going on between them. He never should have touched her yesterday. He was getting all mixed up. Confused. She was confusing him, making him think thoughts he didn’t want, making him want things he’d long ago given up on.
He’d made that mistake once before, he wouldn’t do it again.
“Thanks for the beer,” he said, handing Harper his empty bottle before walking away. “Max,” he said, sticking his head into the playroom, “get your stuff.”
Harper came up behind him. “You’re leaving?” she asked. “Is something wrong?”
He wished he didn’t have to look at her, that he didn’t have to see her confused frown. “I have things to do.”
“At least let me walk you out—”
“We know the way.”
* * *
HARPER WATCHED EDDIE’S back as he walked through her living room and out the door. She was glad he was leaving—which only made her feel guilty.
Why not? She’d felt guilty all day, might as well heap some more onto what was becoming quite a large pile. She hated this. Hated feeling so torn, so sneaky, as if she didn’t even have a right to invite a man to her home. As if her friends and family were watching her, judging her.
Caught Up in You Page 21
