by E. N. Joy
She had never called Locksie at her home before, but remembered that Locksie had given her the number one time. It was on an occasion when Hannah had come into the salon, but Locksie had so many clients waiting that she couldn’t service her. It just so happened that Locksie was going to be off the next day; therefore, she couldn’t do Hannah’s hair then, either. So, Locksie told Hannah that she would do her hair at her home. Hannah wrote down Locksie’s address and phone number. The next morning, one of the girls at the salon called off work and Locksie had to go in anyway, so Hannah ended up being her first client that day.
When Hannah called up the home number she had written down for Locksie, she was surprised when Dawson told her that Locksie no longer lived there; that she was staying at her aunt’s house. Dawson gave Hannah the address, asking her to call him and let him know how Locksie was doing after she talked to her.
Locksie looked at Hannah and shrugged as if to say, “Well?”
Hannah swallowed and then softly uttered, “I’m sorry.” She put her head down as tears began to fall.
Locksie’s heart was softened. She looked away, trying to keep her own tears from falling. Hannah continued.
“I’m so sorry for everything.” Hannah broke down in tears. “I’m sorry for everything I’ve done—everything you thought I did—just everything.” She hunched over and her shoulders began to heave.
Locksie stared at her for a minute. She pitied her estranged friend. She wanted to go over and comfort her, but another part of her remembered that she was the woman who knew about Dawson’s affair with Peni and hadn’t peeped a word of it. But no sooner than that thought had entered her mind, a sermon Reverend Franklin had preached titled “Forgiveness” popped into her head. “How do you expect God to forgive you when you can’t forgive others?” Reverend had said.
Locksie thought about all the mistakes she had made and sins she had committed that God had forgiven her for. She thought about all Jesus had to endure for the forgiveness of her sins. Just then, she felt blessed; she felt blessed that in order for Man to wipe away wrongdoings against each other, all one had to do was say, “I’m sorry.” And all the other person had to say in return was, “I forgive you.” It was that easy. No beatings, no being spat at, no nails.
“I forgive you,” Locksie said as she put her arms around Hannah.
“I feel so ridiculous, Hannah,” Locksie said as the two sat on the couch after Hannah finished explaining to Locksie how she met Drake and why she hadn’t told her about doing business with him. She had no idea that Drake was Dawson’s little brother. She also told her how she hadn’t realized who Dawson really was until that evening at the gym. “And just think, I thought you were cheating on your husband with Drake and double-dating with Dawson and Peni.” Locksie hugged her friend again. “I wish I had just let you explain it all to me before now.”
“Yeah, me too.” Hannah pulled away and put her head down. “You and Elkan both.”
“You and Elkan still haven’t straightened things out?”
“No, but how can we when I’ve been living in a hotel room for the last two weeks?” Hannah confessed.
“What do you mean?”
“He put me out that night after the fight. He wouldn’t let me explain. He was so angry, so mad. Locksie, I swear I thought he was going to hit me. He packed my stuff up and threw it out the door and sent me on my merry way. I’ve tried to talk to him; been calling him every day, but—” Hannah broke down.
“Oh, Hannah.” Locksie took her hand. “I can’t believe you’ve been going through this. What hotel have you been staying at?”
“Country Inn Suites on Broad Street.”
“Well, come on.” Locksie stood, pulling Hannah up with her.
“What? Where are we going?”
“To get your things.” Locksie grabbed her purse and keys. “You’re moving in with me.”
Chapter 42
“She won’t even talk to me,” Dawson confessed to Drake as they sat in Drake’s living room eating pizza and watching the game.
“Have you told her that you’ve broken things off with Peni?”
“No, man. She won’t give me a chance. I haven’t talked to her in over a month; since she packed up and moved her things out. This whole thing is just one great, big mess; a mess she caused in the first place, matter of fact.”
“Whoa, hold up,” Drake said. “The last I checked, you were the one who slept with her client’s husband’s baby mama.”
“Yeah, but I wouldn’t have had to if she had been doing what she was supposed to do in our relationship to keep it right.”
“Pardon me for saying, but she was doing what she was supposed to be doing in y’all’s relationship. She was keeping it holy.”
Dawson slapped his slice of pizza back down in the box. “Don’t start, Drake.”
“I’m not gonna start, big brother. I’m going to finish; and you’re going to shut up and listen!” Drake said with authority. “You have control over your flesh, not Locksie or any other person. You can’t even blame it on the devil. You have control over your flesh. Nobody made you sleep with that woman. You made that choice, and now you are reaping what you have sown. You were a man when you were rolling around in the sack with Peni, but now you don’t want to man up and admit that you made a mistake. Well, how do you expect Locksie to forgive you for a wrongdoing that you won’t even confess to? Even worse, how do you expect God to forgive you for something you won’t even confess to?”
Dawson sat for a minute, taking in his brother’s words, which had a ring of truth to them. He hated the truth. The truth hurt, so his only reply was, “Man, I should have just let dude knock you out cold, because that’s exactly what I feel like doing; blacking your other eye.”
Drake rubbed his hand across his left eye, which was still just slightly bruised from the blow he had suffered a month ago at the hands of Elkan. “Well, I forgive that man for hitting me in the eye, and I’d forgive you too.”
Dawson realized that the fight he was looking for, Drake wasn’t going to give him. “Look, man. I’m going to head home.” Dawson stood up. “There’s some thinking I’ve got to do.”
“Well, before you go, can you do me a favor?”
“Yeah, sure man. What?” Dawson said, willing to do anything just to hurry up and get out of there so that he could go get his mind together.
“Let me pray for you.” Drake extended his hands to his brother.
Reluctantly, Dawson reached out and held hands with his brother. “Man, this feels gay.”
Drake ignored his brother’s comment and just proceeded in prayer. “Dear Heavenly Father, first and foremost, I just thank You for the person whose hands I hold, and ask that You just give him a clear mind to be able to make the right decisions. Lord Jesus, I thank You for the woman in his life who You have reached out to and are preparing a place for in heaven. I just ask that You begin to operate in their relationship and that Your will be done in their lives. I ask that they each let go of trying to handle this thing on their own and let You. Move them out of the way, Father God, and You take over. In Jesus’ name I pray. Amen.”
“Amen,” Dawson repeated. There were a couple seconds of awkwardness for him. “Well, I guess I better go.”
“All right, man. Drive safely,” Drake said as he walked his brother to the door.
As he was cleaning up the mess from the pizza, words he had just spoken to Dawson came to mind: I forgive that man for hitting me in the eye. Drake had forgiven Elkan for knocking him out because he knew he had no business inviting Hannah to that event in the first place, whether or not he had invited her husband also. And when Hannah showed up without her husband, the devil, for a minute, tried to tell Drake that it was a sign meant for him. Drake should have proclaimed that the devil was a liar and either sent Hannah on her way, letting her know that he thought it might be a little compromising to been seen together like that, or he should have left. He couldn’t help but look back and
think of how so much could have been prevented. But thank goodness that God is a forgiving God.
Speaking of forgiving, Drake knew he had to release Elkan by confessing his apologies for anything he had done to provoke the situation through the bad decisions he had made; and forgiving him for his violent act as a result of the situation. They needed to release each other, but he had no way of getting in touch with Elkan.
He thought about how Delilah used to do those Internet searches where she could find out contact information for almost anybody in the country. Thing was, Delilah didn’t work for him anymore. She had upped and quit a couple days after the incident at the gym.
Drake headed toward his home office, where he juiced up his computer. He sat down and logged onto the Internet, thinking it couldn’t be too hard to track down a person.
Chapter 43
Locksie and Hannah had been roommates for a few weeks now. Hannah’s time apart from Elkan had given her time to really look at some things in their relationship that needed repairing, so that if they did get back together, they could have a better marriage. She didn’t want to get back with him just to have to face some of the same jacked-up issues in their marriage; issues that Elkan probably knew bothered Hannah, but that they had never really laid out on the table and talked about.
Locksie, on the other hand, enjoyed the freedom of just keeping her head buried in the Bible for as long as she wanted. Before, Dawson would suck his teeth or sigh as a signal to her that he was tired of always seeing her spending more time in the Word than with him. So, whenever he entered the room and she was reading the Word, she would stop. But now, she would feed off of the Word until she was plenty full. She had to admit, though, at night, after she had said her evening prayer and gone to bed, she couldn’t help but to think about Dawson. For some reason, she just couldn’t turn the love switch to “off” mode no matter how badly he had hurt her.
Together, the two women had been leaning on each other, offering support over the break-up and separation from their mates. Most of the time they found themselves crying and overdosing on cartons of United Dairy Farmers ice cream. But then one Sunday, Locksie invited Hannah to church. Hannah declined, opting to stay home and feel bad. Locksie knew, though, that if she’d just go to church, she wouldn’t leave that place feeling the same. Locksie wanted nothing more than to stand there and try to talk to Hannah until she was blue in the face, but then she remembered how her mother’s preachy-ness had pushed her further away from the bosom of God rather than into His arms, and the last thing she wanted was to do that to her friend. Trying to scare someone into heaven by constantly preaching hell and damnation and making them feel convicted was no way to win a soul.
During that week, Locksie prayed feverently that God would put it in Hannah’s heart to want to come to church with her. That following Sunday, Locksie didn’t even have to ask Hannah if she wanted to come; Hannah asked Locksie if she could tag along with her. Hannah enjoyed the service. She went to the altar for prayer, and the mothers of the church covered her in a mighty-mighty prayer.
After service, Naomi offered to take Hannah and Locksie to lunch. It was then that Naomi suggested that perhaps the two women should meet with First Lady Deborah to get some godly advice on their circumstances.
“The Lord has really given that woman some insight on relationships through trials and tests of her own,” Naomi informed them.
Locksie already knew firsthand and wished she had thought about speaking with the first lady earlier. But it was better late than never as Locksie and Hannah sat in First Lady Deborah’s office one evening.
After the first lady began with prayer, Locksie and Hannah each relayed their current situations to First Lady Deborah. She sat listening intensely until the last word was spoken. Then she sighed a huge sigh. “Hold on, ladies. I gotta grab me a bottle of water. And after hearing those stories, if I wasn’t a Christian, I’d be getting something stronger. Can I grab you two a bottle?”
Locksie and Hannah declined as First Lady Deborah grabbed a bottle of water from the mini refrigerator in her office. She took a sip and then proceeded. “Isn’t God good?”
The excitement in the First Lady’s voice didn’t echo the stories the two women had just told. And although they didn’t feel First Lady Deborah’s excitement, they each agreed that God was, indeed, good.
“Locksie, do you know how many women drive themselves crazy trying to find out what their men are doing? What they’re up to? If they’re running around cheating on them?” First Lady Deborah asked. “Girl, I’ve seen ’em lose weight, gain weight, lose hair, break out with bumps, lose sleep, get ulcers—you name it. But you didn’t have to go through any of that. You didn’t have to go looking for nothing by going through his pants pockets, wallet or trying to break his voicemail code to listen to his messages or even sneak into his email account. God revealed it all to you, didn’t he? Hallelujah!”
Locksie nodded. She had never looked at it that way. Leave it to First Lady Deborah to see the good in what Locksie saw as nothing but a bad situation. Some of First Lady’s excitement was now beginning to brush off on her. Thank You, Lord, Locksie said silently as she thought about some of the horror stories she had heard in the salon of women who had gone so far as to hire private investigators to follow their mates. She knew one who had even contacted that show, Cheaters. And though Locksie was embarrassed that all those strangers in the gym found out her boyfriend was a cheat at the same time she did, at least millions of folks hadn’t seen it on national television. Oh, yes, God is good!
“And you . . .” First Lady Deborah turned to Hannah. “God stopped that spirit of lust in its evil tracks, didn’t He? The devil was going to use the fact that your husband had been unfaithful to try to convince you to pay him back by doing the same thing to him. But God blocked it! Praise the Lord!”
Hannah had never really looked at the situation like that before. Might something in her have pursued a physical relationship with Drake? Was the devil maybe even trying to use her to test Drake?
“Don’t you feel awful that your husband just thinks you cheated on him?” First Lady Deborah asked Hannah.
“Yes,” Hannah replied.
“Imagine how you would feel if you actually had cheated on him.”
Hannah thought about it. “I wouldn’t be able to live with myself, I don’t think.”
First Lady reached out and grabbed Locksie’s and Hannah’s hands. “Ladies, believe me when I tell you God has a blessing in every situation. That’s how He speaks to you.”
“Then why can’t I hear him?” Hannah cried. “I love my husband. Why won’t God tell me what to do?”
First Lady Deborah released the women’s hands and sat back in her chair. She rubbed her chin and then asked Hannah, “Well, did you ask Him?” Then she looked at Locksie. “Have you asked Him what to do about your situation?” Back to Hannah. “Did you even ask God if Elkan was your husband before you said ‘I do’?” Back to Locksie. “Did God say Dawson was your husband?”
The women sat in their chairs, dumbfounded, then Locksie admitted, “I just keep telling God how much I love Dawson and how much I want to be with him.”
Hannah added, “I’ve only really been talking to God and learning how to pray since I’ve been staying with Locksie. I, too, just tell God how much I love Elkan and how much I want to be with him.”
“But have you women asked God what He wants for you? And when you asked, did you wait for an answer?” The women’s blank faces let First Lady Deborah know their answers. “Prayer is a conversation with God. It takes two people to converse. Once you have said to God what you need to say, be silent—and listen. He will always answer when you call.”
“Can I ask you something, First Lady?” Locksie asked. “Is that how you knew Reverend Franklin was your husband? Is that one of the reasons why you waited for him all those years to get out of jail?”
“That’s the only reason why,” First Lady Deborah confirmed.
“And folks thought I was crazy, too. ‘He’s my husband!’ I’d proclaim to them. Because Lord knows I prayed over my situation with my New York Boy, aka Reverend Franklin.” She chuckled. “When I first laid eyes on him, I knew he wasn’t a bit more saved than the man on the moon. But there was this connection—not physical—but like I was on assignment from God. You know, kind of like in the book of Hosea.
“So, I prayed and I waited to hear from God. All I kept hearing was that this boy was my husband, so that’s what I’d tell folks. ‘Oh, that’s just the devil talking to you, trying to trick you into thinking it was God,’ my mama would say. ‘Unh-uh,’ I’d tell her. ‘His sheep know His voice. It was God Himself who declared him as my husband.’ ”
“But why in the world would God be telling you that a drug dealer was your husband? You were a saved woman,” Locksie commented.
First Lady Deborah told Locksie, “I asked myself why my God would have me unequally yoked in a marriage. And He told me to lean not on my own understanding. So, I waited and endured. I ministered to Reverend Franklin back then through jailhouse letters. Never once went to visit him, though. God didn’t tell me to do that. He just told me to feed him the Word and to help him grow. We basically did a five-year written Bible study course.”
“But I thought you said he got sentenced to seven to ten years,” Locksie said.
“God showed him favor to get out early.” First Lady smiled big. “Must have been because all of those souls he brought to the Lord while in there.”
“That’s an awesome story,” Hannah said. “But why go through all of that for a man?” she asked. “Couldn’t you have found another man that was already saved and into church?”
