Bomber glanced my way with a raised brow. “Looks like you have your hands full tonight, Boss.” He looked Gabbie’s way and although he was scowling, I could see the humor in his eyes. Gabbie let go of my arm and took a step towards Bomber, her eyes watching him carefully, female appreciation clearly evident. Bomber handed her a champagne flute. I was about to protest, reminding them that Gabbie and Larz would be on the clock in just a few short hours when Bomber explained it was just orange juice. “Well played, sweets.” Bomber grinned, before turning and strolling confidently towards a group of young women who were watching my team a little too enthusiastically. Whispering into a pretty blonde’s ear, she blushed and nodded, then allowed Bomber to escort her to the dance floor.
Gabbie frowned, a little crease on her brow marring her flawless skin.
“Come on, darlin’. Care to show an old man how it’s done?” Larz said, breaking the subtle tension that had fallen over us.
Gabbie smiled gratefully and followed Larz onto the dance floor. Parker and Drew flanked Annie and me. Parker handed Annie a glass of champagne.
“If you think the look on his face as you walked in here was good, wait till you see the picture Larz took when he knocked on Gabbie’s door. Priceless.” Parker chuckled.
“Everything okay, Boss?” Drew asked, obviously picking up on my tension. I gave him a nod, which by the way his body took on an air of sudden alertness, meant he knew I was full of shit. He was also willing to slip into soldier mode even if he didn’t know what the situation was.
“Poor Bomber,” Annie sighed.
“Trust me, he needed to be dropped down a peg or two,” Parker said with a grin. “If he wants to win her over, he needs to drop the ego.”
“He’s just nervous around her,” Annie murmured. We all gave her an incredulous look. Bomber was anything but nervous around women. “Oh, come on, the rules are as old as time. When a boy likes a girl, he teases her, pulls her pigtails, and snaps the back of her training bra in an attempt to get her attention.”
“I’m pretty sure there are no women wearing training bras here, Annie.” I laughed, and Annie playfully nudged me.
“No, but the rules don’t really change that much as we get older. The man still tells silly jokes and teases. It’s almost like a peacock fanning its feathers and strutting before a prospective mate. In an attempt to mask his nerves and look calm and casual, he overcompensates. Bomber is probably the worst case I’ve seen, but he’s not unlike any other man I know.” We all stared at Annie, her perceptiveness taking us by surprise. She shrugged and blushed. “I studied behavioral psychology in college.”
That threw me for a moment. I thought I knew everything there was to know about Annie, but I never knew she went to college. “You went to college?” I asked, surprised.
Annie looked nervous as her eyes flitted over the crowd before us. She took a sip of her champagne before glancing back at me. “It was around the time Phillip’s behavior began to change. He wanted to suddenly move; it was unexpected and impulsive, and I dropped out and never picked it back up,” she carefully explained. “Ironic I was studying behavior when his illness affected just that.”
“Why don’t you go back and finish?” Parker asked exactly what I was thinking.
“Things are different now. My priorities have changed and I have Eli to provide for.” Her words trailed off as an awkward silence surrounded us.
I filed the information away, and I knew exactly what I was going to do with it, when the time was right. Annie was going to finish her studies, even if it meant part-time study around the coffee shop.
Our silence was thankfully interrupted by the lady of the evening herself, Mercy Carter. She approached us with a gentle smile, her tiny figure wrapped in a beautiful sapphire blue evening gown that did not betray the fifty odd years she must be by now. Her boyfriend, and if rumor served to be correct, soon to be fiancé, Dave, held her hand, dressed in a grey suit that complimented his greying hair, they looked the seamless perfection of a couple in love. Even though Mercy had fought her own battles with an abusive husband before Jax was born, she had rebuilt her life and moved forward. That’s what I wanted for Annie; I wanted that easy smile on her face and the nightmares behind her eyes vanquished.
“Annie, you look stunning.” Mercy wrapped Annie in a hug.
“Ms. Carter,” Parker, Drew, and I all said at once, receiving our own welcoming hug and kiss on the cheek. Dave shook our hands before resuming his place beside Mercy.
“So, who’s the lucky one tonight?” she asked. I had no doubt Parker and Drew were mirroring my raised eyebrow and assuming she wasn’t talking about the kind of lucky we automatically thought of.
Mercy rolled her eyes. “Typical boys,” she scoffed.
“Rebecca and Charlie have Eli,” Annie said at my side, her head obviously not in the gutter like us men. Dave just grinned and shook his head.
“Oh, no, they’re going to return him full of sugar and barely contained energy,” Mercy sighed.
“We’re hoping they did the sugar thing this afternoon, that way they can experience firsthand how much fun it is to wrangle the little fella to bed after candy and ice cream.” Mercy laughed and Annie elbowed me in the ribs.
“We are not hoping that,” she muttered.
“Oh, trust me. They need to learn sooner or later. I’ve got money on Rebecca being pregnant by November.”
I groaned. “Don’t tell me Jax has another bet going?”
Dave nodded. “When does Jax not have a bet of some sort going?” It didn’t really surprise me. He had been just the same when we were serving. Placing bets on which arrogant soldier would be the first to get slapped by the self-righteous and completely unavailable hot nurse, Lieutenant McKenzie, to which particular part of bum-fuck Afghanistan we’d be posted for a mission.
“You had better get your money down quick. It’s only a matter of time before Charlie gets it right and finally knocks her up.” I shook my head as Parker gifted Mercy with a wholesome smile, dimples and all, which appeared to easily smooth any offense she may or may not have had over his comment. I was fairly confident there wasn’t a woman alive who was unaffected by Parker’s charm.
“Speaking of Ella, how’s she doing? I haven’t spoken to her for a couple of days, and I have money down on the baby being born on April second,” Annie asked.
Mercy’s gaze turned wistful. “She’s thirty-eight weeks now, and she’s begun having false labor pains. I’d say it will be sooner rather than later.”
“Not soon enough as far as Jax is concerned. Apparently his little angel has morphed into a little demon for the last trimester,” David said, which resulted in a gentle yet firm slap across the arm courtesy of Mercy.
“She’s pregnant. She’s entitled to a little moaning and groaning.”
“You got dragged into Jax’s whole gambling nonsense?” I asked Annie, a little surprised. A light blush colored her cheeks.
“There is two hundred dollars in that pot, and Eli wants to play Little League,” she murmured a little defensively. “It was only five dollars to place a bet, and if I win, the money will come in handy.” I knew the confession embarrassed her, and I hated that she had to struggle to make ends meet.
The thought that a friendly bet could mean so much to her financially had me gritting my teeth in anger. Before I had chance to soothe the defensive tension that suddenly sat on her shoulders, the MC for the evening called us all to quiet as the night’s proceedings got under way.
As the night continued, I was awed with Annie’s social grace. With a little champagne in her system, her shoulders relaxed. She wore a constant smile and always carried genuine interest in the conversations she was a part of. She held herself with a poise and grace that had me smiling like a lovesick goon while she won the hearts of everyone she met. Gabbie and Larz slipped silently away, but not before I noticed Bomber finally pull Gabbie to the dance floor. Her cheeks were flushed and her eyes carried a little spa
rk when she said her goodbyes. Perhaps she wasn’t as immune to Bomber’s charisma as she liked to think. Finally, the small crowd that seemed to follow Annie around the room dissipated, and I carefully took the champagne glass from her slender fingers.
“Dance with me,” I whispered in her ear, gently guiding her to the dance floor. I didn’t miss the terrified look in her eyes.
“Dillon, I’m not very good . . . I can’t . . .”
Drawing her into my body, she was quickly silenced. Taking one hand in mine and encouraging her other arm around my shoulder, I moved slowly around the dance floor, the slow playing music suddenly nothing but distant background noise as I watched Annie look nervously around us. I let go of her hand long enough to guide her chin around so her eyes were on me. “Who is it you keep looking for?” I murmured. Her gaze held mine and I pulled her a little closer until I could feel the warmth from her body seep into mine. “What triggered the panic attack tonight?” I persisted, and she said nothing. Her body tensed slightly, and when she would have turned her gaze to once again look anywhere but at me, I gently grabbed her chin and held her focus on mine. She took my hand and pulled it away from my face, but instead of allowing her to resume the correct stance, I held her hand close to my chest as we continued to slowly move.
“Just bad memories,” she said, not really answering my question.
“What kind of bad memories?” I probed.
She bit her bottom lip and scrunched her face a little, an action of irritation and frustration. “The kind that are bad,” she said through gritted teeth.
“I just want to understand what’s going on, Annie. I want your trust. You are nervous as hell tonight and you were exactly the same yesterday.” Her eyes held mine and I could tell she was deciding how much she would give me.
“I need to get ahold of Phillip.”
While it wasn’t exactly the type of news I wanted to hear, my body sagged with relief, she was going to tell me, she was trusting me. “Why?”
“I think he’s in some sort of financial trouble.”
Our steps slowed until we were standing amongst the other dancers, frozen in each other’s arms. “What makes you say that?”
“Just a hunch.”
That was a lie. I could have called her out on it, but this was progress, and I didn’t want to damage it. “I can try and find a number for him.”
“You would do that for me?”
“Of course I would. I’m not sure how you think you can help him if he is in some sort of trouble, but we’ll cross that path when we come to it.”
Her eyes twinkled as tears gathered. “Thank you,” she whispered.
I rested my forehead against hers. “I’d do anything for you, Annie, but remember, that includes doing anything to protect you. You aren’t responsible for Phillip anymore.” I felt her nod. My hands traced a soothing path up and down her back, and before I knew it, Annie had melted against me, her entire body like a wet noodle.
“Let’s get out of here,” I suggested, and at her imperceptible nod, I leaned forward and pressed my lips to her forehead before pulling her away from the dance floor.
The drive back to her apartment was quiet; Annie lost in her thoughts, me buried in my own. I wondered how Annie came to the conclusion that Phillip was in financial trouble and I wondered why she felt it was her job to fix it for him. Perhaps she still felt a sense of responsibility towards Phillip; perhaps somewhere under the layers of hurt and fear, she still loved him. That thought almost drew a jealous rumble from my chest. It made me want to reach out and grab her, strip her bare, and make love to her until she knew she belonged to me, her body and her heart. Instead, I gripped the steering wheel tighter and kept my jealous driven thoughts to myself. By the time we had reached her door, my hands were buried deep in my pockets in an attempt to rein in my out of control lust.
Annie unlocked the door and turned towards me with a shy smile. “Thank you for tonight. I really did have a good time, minus the panic attack.” A wisp of hair had fallen from behind her ear, and I wanted to reach out and tuck it back where it had fallen from. Instead, I clenched my fists harder in my pockets.
“I’m proud of you,” I confessed, and the surprised look on Annie’s face made me laugh. “You drew the eye of almost every man in that room. You’re beautiful, smart, kind, and gentle. People gravitate towards you, and you are so humble you don’t even realize it.” She blushed under my compliment. “I’ll wait until you lock the door.” I nodded towards the death grip she had on the door frame. “I’ll call you tomorrow, okay?” She nodded, her gaze dropping to my lips for a split second. I almost groaned out loud but held steady in my resolve to be the perfect gentleman. She glanced up and down the hallway nervously before her gaze settled back on me, and we stood there in silence, which led to an awkward shuffle of her feet before she finally stepped into her apartment.
“Goodnight, Dillon.”
“Goodnight, Sunshine,” I murmured as she shut the door.
As soon as I heard the lock click into place, I reluctantly dragged myself away from her apartment. At my car parked in the street out front, I paused, leaning against the driver’s door. I gently banged my head against the door frame. “Fuck, you should have at least kissed her,” I admonished myself, groaning. “She’ll think something’s wrong.” I turned and leaned against the side of my Chevy, my eyes rising automatically to the window of her second floor apartment. Annie was still hiding something, something she feared, but she had at least offered me an olive branch tonight with her confession she was seeking out her husband. “And if I kiss her, I won’t be able to stop,” I thought out loud. “Shit, I can’t believe I’m talking to myself.” I finally chuckled. The light to her apartment went out, and my head fell back. There was a right thing to do here, and suddenly, I wasn’t sure what that was anymore.
Chapter 11
Annie
I stared at the door I had quietly shut with a resonating ‘click’, separating Dillon and me. It was only a panel of wood between us, but for some reason, it felt like an entire continent. I was going to ask him in for coffee, and yes, it would have been a double entendre, because I didn’t actually want coffee. I wanted Dillon. For the entire ride back to my apartment, I had been lost in a storm of thoughts and a torrent of emotions. I was so scared, and I wanted nothing more than to tell Dillon about the phone call, but I was nervous he would be mad I hadn’t told him sooner. I was also fearful of the repercussions over telling Dillon. I couldn’t risk Eli being put in danger. But my want for Dillon never changed. Under the security I felt when he was around was also womanly desire. It had always been there. Ever since the first time I laid eyes on him, a place inside me unlocked. A place that had long ago been sealed off in an attempt to protect myself and Eli, and now I realized that denying my heart from Dillon protected no one.
But he hadn’t made a move towards me; his eyes didn’t even drop to my lips, his feet had remained firmly planted in the hallway outside my apartment, and his hands were shoved stiffly in his pockets. He hadn’t kissed me. Now, I was confused. Maybe he was having second thoughts, maybe he had a sharp realization that my baggage was bulkier than he first assumed. Maybe my confession about Phillip tonight had made him mad. Perhaps he was just trying to be a gentleman, but surely even a lady deserved a goodnight kiss. I huffed out a frustrated sigh before turning to face the cold, lonely apartment at my back. Perhaps now wasn’t the time to be wondering whether or not the man wanted me. What I really needed to do was figure out how to dig my way out of the hole Phillip had shoved me down. God, I felt so alone and frightened. So fearful it made me nauseated. Eli was safe, probably safer than he would be with me, because at least he had Charlie who was some sort of prize fighting king. This was the first night I’d ever been alone in this apartment, and I hated it. The silence was so all consuming that I flicked on my small secondhand stereo and allowed music to fill the space. Flicking off the light switch, I moved towards my bedroom, stopping at Eli
’s darkened room for a brief moment. I hated not having him here. With another deep sigh, I stepped into my bedroom, moving with a slow dejected shuffle until a loud knock on my door made me scream. I shoved my hand over my mouth and stood frozen in the middle of my bedroom.
“Annie?” I just about collapsed with relief at the sound of Dillon’s voice. Racing down the short hall, I unlocked the door and threw it open. Dillon stood leaning against the doorframe, his tie pulled loose, his hair messed as if he had run his fingers through it like he always did when stressed. His troubled eyes rose to mine as his hands clenched the door frame tighter. “I can’t leave,” he said.
“Is something wrong with your car?” I wondered breathlessly, my heart still pounding like a freight train from the scare.
Dillon quietly laughed and shook his head. “Sweetheart, I can’t walk away from you. I just can’t do it. I wanted to be the gentleman, I wanted to give you time and space, but I can’t even get in my damn car to leave.”
We stared at each other for a moment, the realization of what he was saying wrapping around my heart and making it pound for something other than fear. The way he looked at me with those steel grey eyes, the hunger, the desperation, it made me shiver with awareness. Unable and unwilling to deny him, or myself, what he was offering, I stepped aside, a silent invitation. Dillon’s eyes closed for a moment before he let go of the door frame and stepped into my home. I shut the door behind him and locked it. Having him here with me felt right. I immediately felt safer, the emptiness suddenly replaced with a warm glow. “I can sleep on the couch if you want. I just don’t want to leave. I promise I won’t touch you.”
I stood before him and frowned. “Firstly, the couch is too small for you, and secondly, of all the promises you’ve ever made me, I really don’t like that one. Why won’t you touch me?” I glanced down at my body, still wrapped in the exquisite dress I knew he liked; I had seen the approval in his eyes when he first saw me in it. What about me made him promise such a thing?
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