Just the thought of saying goodbye to Kristina made his chest ache. How was he going to actually do it? He knew she wasn’t the kind of woman that would want him to choose her over his daughter, but that didn't mean it wouldn't hurt her when he did. It seemed that’s all he did lately. Hurt her.
He’d spoken with Xavier after missing their dinner engagement and his son made it very clear how upset she’d been. And though Xavier said he understood, Omar couldn’t help but sense some resentment. Not that he could blame him. He’d be angry with any man that made his mother cry, too. What impact would this new turn of events have on his already fragile relationship with his son?
It seemed no sooner than he got everything he’d ever hoped for, the world came crashing down around him.
Omar leaned over and put his head in his hands.
"Father, I don't understand what’s going on here. I know You said You never leave us and never forsake us, but I'm feeling pretty alone right now. Still, I trust You. I have to. What else can I do? Everything is so messed up. I wanna keep my family safe, but I don’t know how. Please…help me.
“I know You see the end from the beginning and You know what's best. Keep Your hand on my daughter. You love her more than I ever could and I love her with my life. No matter what I want or what I think I want, please work this out so Chloe and Kristina and Xavier don’t get hurt. In Jesus name, I pr—“
The high pitched ring of his cell phone sounded, echoing in the darkened church. Omar jumped up and raced out of the sanctuary, hoping he hadn’t disturbed the praying women. The moment he got through the church doors, he looked at his phone screen. Immediately, he felt both joy and dread.
It was Kristina.
Chapter 17
When she asked if they could meet, Omar didn’t hesitate to agree. Less than twenty minutes later, he was back where they’d reconnected only a short while ago. But this time, when Kristina came out of the rehearsal studio’s back door, she wasn’t wearing an expression of self-doubt or apprehension. She was smiling and shining like the sun.
Seeing her so happy tore Omar up inside. Please help me do this, was all he could pray.
“That’s a pretty serious face you’ve got.” Her voice was light and playful.
“I’m sorry about the other night."
She shook her head. "No, no. Don't be. Xavier filled me in. No details. Just that there’s a problem with your ex and custody. Has anything changed? Have you met with her? Where are you with that right now?"
Omar clenched his jaw. He didn’t want to lie to her, but at the same time, he didn’t want to tell her the whole truth, either.
“We just had a meeting with our attorneys. I'm hoping we can settle this outside of court."
Kristina nodded, her eyebrows knit with concern." Of course. It would be so much easier on your daughter."
He nodded.
"Is there anything I can do?"
"Not really. Marisa can be pretty stubborn, so I'm gonna have to take it one day at a time. Just remember me in your prayers."
"Of course, I will. But you know, I could probably do a little more than that." She smiled at him, a mischievous twinkle in her eye. "It's been a few years since I cooked a full meal, but I made a pretty amazing peach cobbler the other day. Why don't you come to the house for dinner? You and Xavier could spend some time together and maybe you could forget about all this for a couple of hours."
She smiled at him and looked like a shy teenage girl asking her crush out on a first date. It broke his heart.
"Yeah, I don't know…"
She shrugged. "No rush. I know you have a lot on your plate right now. It doesn't have to be today. Whenever you want is fine." She chuckled. "Well, whenever you want as long as it's before next week. Xavier is heading out with the rest of the band for the Show Some Love date in Dallas."
Dread settled like poison in his stomach and he exhaled, leaning against the car. Kristina’s smile faded and she looked at the ground, her hands in her pockets.
“Xavier said you wouldn’t have a lot of time on your hands. I get that. But why do I have a feeling there's something more? Something you're not telling me?"
Omar rubbed the back of his neck. "Because you're not stupid and I’m not very good at keeping secrets."
She took a step toward him and reached out to grab the corner of his jacket, tugging at it. "I'm a big girl, Omar. Whatever it is, just say it."
He took her hand that held on to his jacket and enclosed it in his own. "Marisa threatened to use my relationship with you against me to gain custody."
Kristina's eyes narrowed. "Relationship might be a strong word. I mean, we just started talking again and it's not like—“ Her face went slack and she stepped back. "Oh."
Understanding dawned on her face, only to be quickly replaced by humiliation. He wished there was a rock big enough for him to crawl under.
"Let me guess. Rehab. The incident at the hotel.” She bit her lip. “And that's before they do a little digging."
"Kristina—“
"No. I understand. Believe me, I do.” She swallowed hard. “I'm just sorry my past put you in this position. You don't deserve this."
She didn’t deserve this. Marisa didn’t even know her and yet she was ready to expose all her dirty laundry just to get back at him. It wasn’t fair. Especially after all the hard work Kristina had put into getting her life together.
"And please, get that guilty look off your face." She smiled. "You're making me feel worse than I already do."
"I'm sorry."
"Don't be. We waited eighteen years. What's twelve more?"
He looked at her, hardly able to believe what he’d just heard. Was she really saying she was willing to wait for him until Chloe was eighteen?
"I can’t ask you to do that."
"You didn't."
He took her by her shoulders and pulled her in, putting his arms around her. The feel of her face cradled in the curve of his neck was like an answer to a prayer. Twelve years seemed an eternity after coming so close to being with her again, but what choice did he have? There was no one else for him but her.
"Okay," she said, pulling away and taking a few steps back. "So it's a date? Me and you. In a decade. Give or take a couple years?"
She laughed but he could see the sadness in her eyes. She blew him a kiss, then turned and ran to the studio door. She wiped her cheeks with the edges of her sleeves as she went.
It should have been easier than this.
He’d already said goodbye to her once before. Why was watching her walk away today a thousand times harder?
“Hello?”
Kristina hadn’t planned on crying the moment her friend, Robin Jones, answered the phone. She hadn’t even planned on giving her an update on the whole Omar situation. Kristina didn’t want to think about it, much less, talk about it. All she wanted to do was what they always did during their weekly phone call: laugh, talk and pray together.
God knows she was in desperate need of all three. Not that she couldn’t do the same with her sisters, but since her overdose in Dallas, Kristina and Robin had become especially close. Not just as friends, but as spiritual sisters.
“Kristina? Sweetie, what’s wrong?”
Kristina tried to respond more than once, but failed each time. Robin, as usual, knew just what to do and waited until her friend could speak without choking back tears.
“I’m sorry.”
“Girl, please. You know you don’t have to say that to me.”
Kristina sighed. “I don’t even wanna tell you why I’m over here sobbing like some big ol’ baby.”
Robin laughed. “I’m sure you don’t. But since we both know you’re gonna, you might as well just get it over with.”
Now Kristina was the one laughing. It was true. However dark, shameful or embarrassing, her secrets never remained secrets for long when Robin was around. What she still couldn’t get over was that Robin never judged her or made her feel bad about any of it
. She just listened and then suggested one thing: Let’s take it to God.
“Well, like I told you before, it looked like Omar and I—“ Kristina stopped, not wanting to cry again. “I don’t know. It just seems a lot of things are rushing in on me at once. Things I thought I’d gotten past.”
“Like what?”
“When I found out about Xavier, all I could think about was what mama had taken from me. Then I thought, you know what? Just forget it. You have him now. Be grateful for that. But since Omar came back into the picture, I keep thinking about what our lives could have been like. I can’t stop wondering what it’d be like to be a wife and mother. To wake up with my family in the morning and go to bed with them at night. For a moment, I thought it might happen. Today I realized it’s not.
“One day Omar and I might end up together, but even if we do, my chance to hold a baby or read a little one a bedtime story will be gone. I never let myself admit to wanting those things because it hurt too much. But being so close to having that dream come true …” Again, Kristina stopped until she was sure she could continue without crying. “I’m being greedy. I know that. I should just be grateful that Xavier is here at all. There's so many women who lost their babies and would give anything for my second chance.”
Robin remained silent for so long, Kristina thought maybe the call had dropped.
“Robin?”
There was a muffled sound, something like a sob on the other end of the line.
“Just a minute.”
Robin’s end was muted, but only for a few moments.
“Robin? Are you okay?”
Robin cleared her throat. “Yeah. It’s just… I can relate to what you’re saying.”
Kristina’s heart went out to Robin. In the short time they’d known each other, their relationship had consisted of Robin helping, holding and praying Kristina through. It’d never occurred to her that Robin had her own struggles to deal with.
“Robin—“
“It’s okay, Kristina. It’s something I made peace with a long time ago. Just every now and then…” Robin exhaled. “Don’t worry about me. And listen, don’t give up, either. Before this whole thing even started, God knew how it would end. Remember how hopeless everything seemed just a few months ago? You were ready to die. But look at what God did! I don’t know what He has in store this time, but if I know Him at all, I have to believe it’s something good.”
Chapter 18
When Brock showed up for work at their office, Omar did his steady best to avoid him. They crossed paths a couple of times—in the break room, at the front desk—but Omar made sure he left the room before Brock had a chance to speak to him. The others in the office noticed, of course, but wisely kept their questions and suspicions to themselves.
Then, just as Omar was getting ready to leave for the day, Brock came into his office, closing the door behind him.
“I can’t deal with you today, man.”
“I understand—“
“No. You don’t.”
Brock swallowed and ducked his head. “Wrong choice of words. I just meant I know you don’t want to see me right now. And if it’ll make it easier, I’ll take a leave of absence for a while. The only reason I even came in today was because of Gina.”
Omar stopped packing his attaché case and looked up. No, he didn’t want to talk to Brock right now, but they were still co-owners of a company. And Gina, as Brock’s administrative assistant, was one of their employees. If something was going on with her, he needed to put his issues with Brock aside long enough to deal with it.
“Is something wrong?”
“She’s worried about you. Everybody is. That’s why she called me. The office gossip is that Marisa’s trying to—“
“Don’t worry about Marisa. Or Chloe.”
“I can help.”
Omar laughed. “Trust me, you’ve done more than enough, my brotha.”
Brock looked as if Omar had just punched him in the gut. He hung his head. “I’m the last person you want help from. I get that. But believe it or not, you are like a brother to me. One I never deserved, but a brother all the same.”
Omar stared down at his desk. As much as he wanted to be angry at Brock, Omar knew he wasn’t a bad person. He also knew this secret had eaten at Brock like a cancer for years. And though he wasn’t ready to admit it out loud, he’d given him a gift when he chose to let Omar be a father to Chloe in his place.
Brock took a step toward Omar and placed the manila envelope he’d been holding on the desk.
“What’s this?”
“Paperwork regarding the negotiation you just completed on the commercial property. It’s my portion of the sale. I’ve had everything drawn up by my lawyer, all you have to do is sign.”
“You really think you can give me a few million dollars and everything’s cool?”
“Of course not. I’m not trying to buy your forgiveness. I’m giving it to you because it’s the only way to resolve this problem with Marisa.”
Omar snorted. “And that’s a subject you know all about, isn’t it?”
“Yeah, actually, I do. And it’s part of the reason she and I never got along. Just stop hating me long enough to hear me out.”
Omar shook his head, but came around to the front of his desk and sat against the edge. “Fine. Talk.”
“Look, you wanted kids. You. Not Marisa. All she ever wanted was you. Everything she’s ever done, including having Chloe, was about you. This custody thing? Still all about you. She couldn’t care less what it’s gonna do to Chloe. And now that Kristina’s in the picture?” Brock shook his head and exhaled. “She’s gonna be out for blood. And there’s only one way to get to you.”
Omar didn’t need Brock to spell it out for him. He already knew the answer: Chloe.
“With Kristina back in your life, Marisa can’t lie to herself anymore. There’s zero hope for reconciliation. Chloe’s the one that’s gonna pay for that.”
Omar stood and went back around his desk, dropping in his leather executive chair.
“Kristina’s not back in my life. Marisa’s already made sure of that.”
Brock frowned. “What happened?”
“What difference does it make? She has the leverage she needs to make me look like the unstable parent. And if I don’t stay away from Kris, she’ll use it. Case closed.”
Brock sat in one of the chairs on the other side of Omar’s desk. He tapped the manila envelope on the desk’s surface.
“And that’s why you need this. Shared custody is not enough. You need full custody. And I know how you can get it.”
“There’s no way Marisa would agree to my having full custody. That would mean giving me everything I could ever want. She’d die before she did that.”
“Not if you gave her what she really wants first.”
“Money? If it were that easy, I would have done it already.”
“It’s a little more than money. And in the grand scheme of things, it won’t be all that hard, either. But trust me, you’re not gonna like it.”
Xavier brought his duffle bag and carry-on down the stairs. Upon seeing the luggage, Kristina feigned complete and utter devastation. Pam caught on and joined in. Tamia, at the kitchen island, bent over a bowl of cereal, rolled her eyes.
Kristina grabbed Xavier’s shirt and shook him. "No! Don't go! What will we do without you?"
Pam flung herself over the counter and wailed. "Don't leave us, Xavier. Don't go!"
"Y'all need help." Tamia said, shoveling another spoon full of Cocoa Puffs in her mouth.
Xavier put his hands up. "Ladies, ladies. Please. Try to control yourselves. I break hearts. It’s what I do."
Pam stopped wailing and busted out laughing. "Now, I don't know about all that. But I am gonna miss you."
Kristina hugged him and nodded. "Me too."
"First of all, you’ll see him again in two days. Second, why don't nobody care that I'm gonna be on that bus, too?"
&nb
sp; Pam went and draped herself over Tamia’s shoulders. "Oh, is the baby feeling neglected? It's okay. We're gonna miss you, too."
Xavier reached into his carry-on and pulled out a cardboard box, setting it on the countertop.
“I’d planned on giving you this when I first got here, but I forgot. Anyway, I thought you might wanna open it in private, so I wanted to make sure you had it before we left for Dallas."
Kristina turned the box to better read the writing across the top of it. Pam and Tamia came to where she was to do the same.
"What is it?"
Xavier shrugged. "I have no idea. My mom and I were clearing out Mother Mahalia's house and we found it. It had your names on it so I didn't open it."
The sisters exchanged looks.
Pam cleared her throat. "Well, that's… Thank you, Xavier. We appreciate you doing that."
He grinned, obviously pleased to have helped. "No problem." He pointed at Tamia. “Are we still doing that Star Wars marathon before we go to your house?”
She nodded. "Yeah, I'll meet you in the media room."
All three women watched and waited for him to leave before returning their attention to the box.
"What do you think it is?"
"Who knows?"
"Who cares?"
"Tamia."
"What? When has a surprise from mama ever been good? Well, with the exception of Xavier.”
Kristina leaned one arm on the counter and took another look at the box. "She has a point. Do we really want to know what's inside?"
Pam picked up the box and shook it. "So…what? We just toss it?"
Tamia and Kristina looked at each other and nodded.
"Okay. But let's wait until you two are already on your way to Dallas. He went through all the trouble to bring it here. I don't want him to know we have no intention of opening it."
When Omar arrived at the meeting to finalize the shared custody agreement, his attorney was waiting for him in the parking lot.
"I don't know what's going on, but Marisa's lawyer says she's furious."
That was an understatement.
Then Sings My Soul (The Langston Family Saga Book 2) Page 10
