by Sara Pascoe
For a different perspective, Pornland: How Porn Has Hijacked Our Sexuality by Gail Dines is a world of horror but an equally important part of this discussion.
The Erotic Engine by Patchen Barss: a great history of porn and technology. See also Beaver Street: A History of Modern Pornography by Robert Rosen: a broad, jaunty overview from someone with a lot of experience in the industry.
Jenna Jameson’s autobiography How to Make Love Like a Porn Star is fun and comic and yet still gives space to discussion of consent, power, assault and the painful injuries that can result from stripping. See also Girlvert by Oriana Small.
Stripped by Jennifer Hayashi Danns, with Sandrine Lévêque, is a really insightful and interesting look at exotic dancing.
Some more science-orientated books include Testosterone Rex by Cordelia Fine, which argues that gender dynamics are created by hormones, environment, evolution and culture, rather than a ‘sex recipe’ that instructs behaviour; and Testosterone: Sex, Power and the Will to Win by Joe Herbert is fascinating about how the hormone drives competition and desire for power.
The Dangerous Passion by David Buss: yes, the guy from the experiments. This book explores the evolution of jealousy alongside romantic love.
Mismatch by Ronald Giphart and Mark van Vugt: an interesting read that considers how primitive brains process the stimulations of the modern world. See also The Consuming Instinct by Gad Saad.
Who Stole My Spear? by Tim Samuels is great on male bodies and evolutionary pressures versus contemporary expectations.
How Pleasure Works by Paul Bloom and I, Mammal by Loretta Graziano Breuning are both fantastic, readable books that teach about animal processes in our bodies and how they affect us day to day, from social ‘happiness’ to why some people enjoy S&M.
On masculinity, Be a Man by Chris Hemmings and Man Up by Jack Urwin both use personal experience, anecdotal evidence and research to explore maleness in our culture.
Man Alive by Thomas Page McBee: a beautiful and painful autobiography written by a trans man.
Stand by Your Manhood by Peter Lloyd: I mean, some of this book is contrary in a rather hateful way. Some of it is really important and needs wider discussion.
… and out of your ears
There are also some brilliant podcasts exploring topics I have touched on:
Episode 13 of Ear Hustle is called ‘Dirty Water’: a survivor interviews a trafficker in prison. This is a very emotional listen, but illuminating and important.
Episode 35 of Vice Meets, ‘Sex Work Is Work’, with Melissa Gira Grant.
The Intelligence Squared debate ‘Pornography Is Good for Us’ from October 2016. It’s also worth listening to their debate from September 2018, ‘How Tech Has Hijacked Our Brains’.
Episode 220 of This American Life explores testosterone really interestingly.
Episode 33 of MOWE deals with porn, masturbation and dopamine in an engaging and open-minded way.
Death, Sex and Money has a number of episodes on porn, sex education, morality and cultural values around sex. All very measured and entertaining.
The debate about laws around sex work in the US is brilliantly set out by Reply All episode 119, ‘No More Safe Harbour’, and the ‘Shutting Down the Online Marketplace’ episode of Sold in America. The latter series is completely excellent, and the host, Noor Tagouri, allows people to speak for themselves, something I, writing a book, was unable to do.
For that reason I have also recorded a series of interviews with people who have expertise on some of the issues we’ve raised to accompany this book, for some further exploration, disagreement and enlightenment. Search for ‘Sex Power Money’ on any podcast-hosting app.
Acknowledgements
If you interacted with me in any way in the last few years, if we had a brief chat about sex, porn, massage parlours or men paying for dinner, you are part of this book. As I roamed around trying to process how sex and money affect our lives, it was your opinions and your understanding that led mine. There are stories I haven’t told: the man in love with a scammer who’ll take his money but doesn’t want him; the woman who has sex with friends for money to buy her kids expensive trainers. This subject is so incredibly broad, a see-saw with some people at the far edges but most of us clotted in the middle. I don’t think I will ever stop wanting to understand it.
I am very grateful to the people who have spoken to me about their work and experience. Jane and Robyn, who gave up hours of your time correcting my misconceptions and answering my questions, you both shaped this book, as I imagined you reading it and did not want to disappoint you. Charlie Rose, thank you for educating me about the laws regarding sex work in our country and the various legal situations for sex workers abroad. Alex Feis-Bryce, thank you so much for sharing your knowledge about everything and letting me get drunk in a political establishment. There are several other sources that I have disguised in order to protect their privacy. If you recognise something you have shared with me – thank you. You have expanded my understanding of people.
As I began researching my book, especially after I mentioned it on Woman’s Hour on BBC Radio 4, numerous kind souls got in touch to lend a hand. This is not an exhaustive list but a reminder that any author regularly relies on the kindness of strangers: Rebecca Collins from the Great Men Initiative, Hubert O’Hearn, Sarah Trotman, Faye Blackwell, Hamilton Young and Leah Jewett, thank you for helping me. Thank you to Matt H. for telling me about your mum and Marcus B for sharing his past so openly, David H for his patience with my prying and Suzi R for explaining lesbian dating.
Thank you to my friends Mona Chalabi and Professor Sophie Scott for your assistance. Thank you so much, Gil Greengross, for showing an interest and then helping me access academic materials. Thank you to Robin Ince, who put me in touch with Professor Matthew Cobb, who in turn prevented me from including salacious but unfounded theories and focused my study. Thank you to Jenny Bede for transcription, thank you to Dean Burnett and the amazing Anne Miller for fact-checking, and to power-brained Eleanor Rees for correcting all the words I used thinking they meant something else.
Thank you to my mum, who once again has allowed me to write about her private life and only laughs at my rude ingratitude.
Thank you to the exes, who I hope don’t read this.
Thank you to my dog Mouse, who ate two corners of the second draft.
Thank you, Steen Raskopoulos, for existing. I love you.
Thank you, everyone at Faber, for sticking with me, especially my editors Laura Hassan and Rowan Cope, and good old Julian, who got the ball rolling. Thank you, Dawn Sedgwick, who made this life of mine possible.
Thank YOU, reader, the most. But please don’t think you need to tag me in your middling online review. *winky face emoji*
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About the Author
Sara Pascoe is a highly acclaimed comedian, writer and actor. Her extensive TV credits include the BBC solo stand-up special LadsLadsLads; BBC2’s Frankie Boyle’s New World Order, on which she is a weekly guest contributor; and Comedians Giving Lectures on Dave, which she hosts. She wrote and performed the BBC Radio 4 series Modern Monkey and the BBC2 short Sara Pascoe vs Monogamy, which was inspired by her first book Animal.
@sarapascoe
sarapascoe.com
Also by the Author
ANIMAL
Copyright
First published in the UK in 2019
by Faber & Faber Ltd
Bloomsbury House
74–77 Great Russell Street
London WC1B 3DA
This ebook edition first published in 2019
All rights reserved
© Sara Pascoe, 2019
Cover design by Luke Bird
Photography © Matt Crockett
The right of Sara Pascoe to be identified as author of this work has been asserted in accordance with Section 77 of the Copyright, Designs and Patents Act 1988
Every effort has been made to trace or contact all co
pyright holders. The publishers would be pleased to rectify at the earliest opportunity any omissions or errors brought to their notice.
This ebook is copyright material and must not be copied, reproduced, transferred, distributed, leased, licensed or publicly performed or used in any way except as specifically permitted in writing by the publishers, as allowed under the terms and conditions under which it was purchased or as strictly permitted by applicable copyright law. Any unauthorised distribution or use of this text may be a direct infringement of the author’s and publisher’s rights, and those responsible may be liable in law accordingly
ISBN 978–0–571–33601–2
