by Nikki Paris
I tried to hold in my laugh, but it burst out of me. I sat up and stretched out my arms. “I told you he was a dumbass.” I was way too thrilled that Dani didn’t like Cory.
“So, you’ll help me?” Dani gave me a sweet smile.
“Nope. I only help animals and children.” I stood and grabbed my water bottle. “Why don’t you tell the guy yourself that you don’t like him? That doesn’t seem like it should be a problem for you.”
“I did! My e-exact words were, ‘This isn’t going to work out.’ Somehow he heard, ‘Text me every few hours until I agree to love you.’” Dani rolled her eyes. “Can’t you just like, threaten him with your big muscles? He has to be afraid of you, right? Isn’t everyone?”
I shot Dani a glare and shook my head. “I have no desire to get involved in your love life. Be a big girl and take care of it yourself.” But a part of me did want to tell Cory to fuck off.
“Oh, screw you. I’ll just text your sister. D-d-did you know she invited me to dinner again?” Dani laughed and slid into that ass in the air pose.
That was my cue to leave. “You can be friends with my sister. Doesn’t mean you and I are friends.” I turned and walked out of the gym without looking back.
I pulled out my phone to text my sister. Really, Amy?
What?
Don’t play dumb. Enjoy your dinner with Dani.
I will! You’re welcome to come, Con! Next Tuesday! Did you get that date set up yet??
I kept hoping Amy would forget that I told her I’d go on a date. Amy forgot nothing. I let myself into my apartment and took a shower. Afterward, I collapsed on my bed and reinstalled the Tinder app that I’d deleted over a year ago. I swiped right on the first picture that popped up without even looking at it.
Matched.
I messaged a pretty brunette named Ciera and set up a date for Saturday night. I texted Amy next. All set.
Then I heard a knock at my door. I pulled on a pair of clean athletic shorts and went to answer it.
Dani stood there, still in her skin tight yoga clothes, holding two cans of Coke. “Whoa.” She was staring at my abs.
“My eyes are up here, Princess. Are you a little confused?” I folded my arms and narrowed my eyes at her.
“Ha! Do you know what I like about you, Connor? You just say it like is.” Dani laughed and held out the soda. “These are replacements for the drinks I stole.”
I rubbed my jaw and couldn’t stop the smile that forced its way onto my face. She liked something about me? I reached out to take the cans from Dani. She gave me a sweet little smile and said, “Night, Connor.”
“Goodnight, Dani.” I smiled and started to close the door. Then, something like insanity made me say, “I’m not going to drink both.”
Dani stared at me and narrowed her eyes. “Are you…?”
“Inviting you in? Yes. You better hurry before I change my mind.” I held the door open and backed away to let her pass.
Dani’s pretty little mouth dropped open in shock, but she walked through my front door. “Whoa, Connor, I think we might be friends.”
I laughed and grabbed two glasses from my cupboard. “No. We’re not.”
Dani raised her eyebrows. “I don’t know, man. Friends drink soda together.” She smiled and took a sip from the glass I handed her. Then she looked around my apartment. “I was freaking out about my dog the last time I was in here, so I didn’t notice, but you seriously don’t like decorating, d-do you?”
“Nope.”
“What do you l-like, Connor? Let’s round y-you out as a person.”
“Nope.”
Dani laughed out loud. “Nope? Just nope?”
“I think you heard me.”
Dani’s pretty blue eyes sparkled, and she laughed again. Damn, she was cute when she was laughing. “Why are you such an asshole?” she asked.
“I might tell you if we were friends.”
“And w-why can’t we be friends?”
Because I might fall for you.
“All right, too many questions. Get out.” I plucked the glass from her hand and drank the rest of her soda while holding open my front door. She needed to get lost before I did something stupid, like kiss her.
Dani did all my favorite things. She gaped at me like I was a jerk. Then she smiled, then she laughed and shook her head. “Whatever, jerk. I’ll see you around.” My eyes followed her ass all the way to her front door, where she turned around and gave me one last cute little smile.
I needed to stay away from Dani. She would want more than I could give her, and I’d just end up hurting her. She deserved better.
◆◆◆
This was a horrible, awful, insane mistake.
I wasn’t ready for a date.
I stood outside the restaurant where I was supposed to meet Ciera. My palms were sweating, and my chest felt tight. I could see her through the window, sitting at the bar in a little black dress. She had long, shiny brown hair and almond-shaped eyes. Ciera was hot by any and every definition of the word, but I already knew I wasn’t going to walk inside and sit down with her.
I’d tried this once before, about a year ago, with a pretty redhead named Sydney. We made it through appetizers, but I was gone before the entrees arrived. Sydney’s only offense? Laughing and touching my arm.
I wasn’t ready then, and I wasn’t ready now.
Ciera frowned and checked her phone. Then she glanced around the restaurant, looking for me. I pulled out my phone and typed out a quick message to Ciera. Sorry. I’m not going to make it tonight.
I watched her pick up her phone, pout, and then roll her eyes. After that, it took her all of thirty seconds to approach another guy at the bar. The super average looking dude lit up like Ciera had just fucking made his entire year.
He could have my meaningless sex tonight. I didn’t want it.
I walked back to my car, and my thoughts drifted to an unexpected place. They weren’t consumed with Callie like they were when I tried to date a year ago. Instead, I was thinking about Dani. Would I have walked into the restaurant if she’d been the one waiting for me?
I knew the answer, whether I’d admit it to myself or not.
16
Dani
I got two phone calls — one to tell me I’d secured the receptionist position at Brandon Financial, and the other to let me know I didn’t get the part I’d auditioned for two weeks ago.
What time was it? Wine-o-clock? Sweet! “Lizzy, let’s go for a walk!” I had every intention of going to the grocery store and picking out three bottles of wine for myself. One to say, “Congrats on the job, Dani!” One to say, “Sorry, that you suck and your acting career is over.” And one more, just for good measure. But first, I needed to take Lizzy out, so she didn’t piss on my carpet.
Lately, she was into what I liked to call “spiteful carpet pissing.” It was like she still hadn’t forgiven me for leaving a tray of brownies out and sought revenge every time I left my apartment. I was going through lots of carpet cleaner and spending a little too much time on my knees — not in a sexy way.
Speaking of sex, I was going through a serious dry spell. In the last four months, I’d been on one awful Tinder date, met an asshole at a club, and sat through one shitty drink with Devin’s little brother. Full disclosure, I only went on that date to see if it would piss off Connor. I know, super mature.
Other than that, the closest I’d gotten to fucking someone was when I backed my ass up into Connor’s erection. Yum. I still masturbated to that moment.
And, oh my god, Connor had my mind spinning in circles. One minute, he was a complete asshole. Then, all of a sudden, he was a gentle hero, saving my dog’s life. Then he was an asshole again. Then he was all sweet and adorable with his nephew. After that, he went back to asshole, but maybe kind of a friendly asshole. Was that a thing?
It made me want him like crazy. Fuck. I had issues. I should probably make another appointment with my therapist.
“Lizz
y, let’s go!” I picked up Lizzy’s leash and slid my feet into the only expensive pair of shoes I’d allowed myself to keep. They were the bright red, obnoxious ones, and they were entirely impractical for dog walking. Lizzy glanced at me and then stretched out on my sofa with a big yawn.
“Elizabeth Bennet, you get over here right now!” I snapped my fingers and dangled her leash. She grumbled and finally sauntered over to me.
After her walk, I headed to the grocery store to pick out my wines. But, when I got home, I couldn’t bring myself to go inside. I hated my apartment, and I hated that I would have to accept a soul-sucking job to pay for it.
Besides all of that, Lizzy was going to give me her judgy eyes if I drank an entire bottle of wine in front of her. I knew she would. Little bitch. I sank onto the ground outside my front door, leaning my back against it, and pulled out the bottle of Rosé. “Rosé all day,” I mumbled to myself and twisted off the cap. It was a super classy cheap wine that didn’t even have a cork. I took a swig and leaned back, closing my eyes.
My eyes popped open immediately when I heard footsteps on the stairs. Connor’s sexy, pissed off face appeared moments later. He looked all dressed up and drool-worthy. He stopped walking when he saw me and cocked an eyebrow. Fucking hell. He was even more judgy than Lizzy!
“The hell are you doing, Princess?”
I groaned out loud. “Dan-i-ca. Say it with me now. Danica. Not Princess!”
A smile danced across his lips. “Okay, Dani.”
“Fuck. Close enough. Carry on, jerk.” I waved him away and gulped some more wine.
“Con-nor. Say it with me now. Connor.”
I laughed. “That’s fair. Go away, Connor.”
He folded his arms across his broad chest and leaned against the railing. “Are you locked out or something?”
I sighed. “No. Lizzy judges me, and I can’t handle h-h-her shit.” I took another swig. “I didn’t think I’d be dealing with yours if I stayed out here. Y-you usually don’t come out of your apartment on th-the weekends.”
Connor smiled at me and shook his head. Fucking hell. His smile was so sexy. He’d been smiling at me lately, and it made me want to be a goddamn angel every time I saw him.
“Okay, Dani. Enjoy getting drunk out here.” He unlocked his front door and pulled it open.
“Hey,” I spoke up, my heart pounding. “You wanna drink with me? I have a red and a white in this bag, too.” What the hell was I doing? I was leaving myself wide open for him to shut me down and make me feel stupid.
Connor turned with a raised eyebrow. “Didn’t you just tell me to go away?”
I shrugged. “I say a lot of crazy things. I’m a drama queen.”
“Congrats on your self-awareness.” Then, to my complete and utter shock, Connor crossed the space between us and sank down next to me on the ground. Our shoulders were touching. “I’ll take the red.”
My heart was racing so fast that I could hardly breathe, and my body felt frozen. “O-o-o-okay.” I reached for the brown paper bag at my side and pulled out the bottle of Pinot Noir. I passed it over to Connor, praying he couldn’t see that my hand was trembling.
He took the bottle, letting his fingers brush against mine. Then he smirked at me and asked, “Am I making you nervous?”
I scoffed and took a drink from my bottle. “N-nope.” Shit. I rolled my eyes and lied. “I f-f-finally had a g-good audition a c-c-couple weeks ago. J-just heard back.” I cleared my throat and took a deep breath. I had to stop stuttering.
“And?” Connor drank from his bottle and glanced over at me.
I focused on breathing and stretching each word. “And I didn’t get it. I’m going to have to take a stupid office job. Don’t tell Marshall.” The next words that came out of my mouth surprised me. They were meant for quiet moments, sitting alone in my living room, not for Connor’s ears. I almost whispered. “I feel like a failure.”
Connor watched me with his dark brown eyes. “I don’t think you should give up yet, Dani. I watched some old episodes of My Sweet Step-Monster with Marshall last weekend. You were good. You inspired him.”
I shrugged and took a drink, feeling tears prick the corners of my eyes. Was I actually about to cry in front of this sexy asshole? Again? “I-I-I haven’t had a r-r-r-real acting job in thirteen years. Th-th-that’s p-pretty much screaming that I sh-should g-g-g-give up.” Damn those hard G words. They always tripped me up the most.
Connor rubbed his jaw and then said, “And I haven’t had a real date in over two years.”
I gaped at him. “Why? You’re hot!” I clapped my hand over my mouth. He already knew he was hot. He didn’t need the satisfaction of me telling him.
Connor smirked at me for a second and then chugged more wine. When he brought the bottle back down, his expression was solemn and cold. “My wife died a little over two years ago.”
My breath caught in my chest, and my heart stopped beating. Wife? Died? Holy shit…
He stared straight ahead, gripping the bottle in his hand. “I was supposed to be on a date tonight, but I didn’t even go inside the restaurant. I just stood the girl up.” He took another drink.
“Whoa…” I almost whispered, shock and sadness filling my chest. I wasn’t sure if I should ask, but the alcohol was weakening my filter. “How did she… d-d-die?”
Connor set his bottle of wine down, and I thought for sure he would leave and end our conversation, but he glanced over at me with eyes full of pain. Suddenly I saw that his eyes weren’t cold. They were just deep and a little lost.
After a long pause, he said, “Fucking car accident. She was texting and driving. I always told her it was going to get her killed.” He scoffed and looked at his lap. “The worst part is, she was texting me. And we were in a fight. She died, fight-texting her asshole husband.”
“Shit,” I whispered. “I’m a goddamn whiny baby.” I pulled out the bottle of white wine and laid in Connor’s lap. “You need this more than I do.”
Connor put the bottle back in my lap and shook his head. “Alcohol doesn’t make it go away. It won’t bring Callie back.” He capped the bottle of red at his side and glanced over at me. “I’m not telling you this so you’ll feel sorry for me. I’m really tired of people feeling sorry for me.”
“Why did you tell me?” I wanted to lace my fingers through his. I wanted to apologize for every bratty thing I’d ever said to him. He was living breathing proof that we all have no idea what demons people are battling.
“Because, Princess Dani, if you can give up on your dreams, then I can give up on ever being happy again.”
“Touché.” I gulped some more wine and gave Connor a sideways glance. “O-okay, I won’t g-give up if you won’t g-give up.” I paused and straightened my black lace a-line skirt. “Here’s a deal for you: I’ll force myself to g-go on t-two auditions this week if you finish this w-wine with me t-tonight and have a tiny bit of fun.” I held my thumb and pointer finger together to illustrate the tiny amount of fun he’d have with me. I flashed him my best smile and waited for his response.
Connor gave me his trademark raised eyebrow look, let out a long irritated sigh, and said, “Deal.” He reached over to shake my hand. Then he stood and pulled me up with him.
My bottle of Rosé was already half gone and getting to my head a little. I stumbled into him, twisting my ankle on my stupid red shoes. Ugh. His body felt amazing. Being this close to him made me want to do something stupid.
“Careful, Princess Dani.” Connor smirked at me. “Let’s move the party inside. It’s getting cold out here.”
We scooped up the wine, and I followed Connor into his apartment with my heart racing.
17
Connor
What was I playing at inviting Dani into my apartment while we were both half drunk? I was painfully attracted to her, but my guilt over Callie would never let me act on my attraction. I hadn’t even managed to start a date tonight.
But spending time with Dani f
elt different than going on a date. And she’d just responded perfectly when I told her about Callie. She’d acknowledged my pain, listened, and then moved the conversation forward without making me feel awkward or pitied.
Dani hopped up to sit on my kitchen counter and crossed her long sexy legs at the ankle. She pressed her bottle of Rosé to her lips and tipped her head back, showing off her gorgeous neck.
Fuck, she was hot. This was almost torture. Her short black skirt sent my mind straight to the gutter. I’d just stood up a date to come home and fantasize about sliding my hand up Dani’s skirt. If I hadn’t had a hard-on for Dani for months, I would have been surprised at how easy it was to imagine sleeping with her.
Guilt wrapped its fingers around my neck and shut down the fantasy. We were just drinking tonight. We weren’t even friends.
I re-opened Dani’s bottle of Pinot Noir and took a swig. This was the first drink I’d had in two months. I finished my dry August challenge and then went for September, too, just to prove to myself that I was in control of my drinking.
“So which episodes of My Sweet Step-Monster did you watch?” Dani asked.
I looked at the bottle in my hand. This drinking felt different tonight. It almost felt fun, like Dani promised. “The first three. I think Marshall watched more after I left. He’s pretty obsessed with you now.” I grinned at Dani and leaned against the counter beside her. “I don’t blame him. You were a pretty cute kid.” What the hell? Was I flirting with her?
“Aw!” Her eyes sparkled, and she laughed. “Marshall’s such a sweetheart!” She took another drink and then gave me a mischievous smile. “Was that a little flirting, Connor?”
I laughed and shook my head. “No. Don’t flatter yourself, Princess.”
Dani bit her lip. I wanted to bite it too. “Oh shit,” she said. “There’s the jerk again. Don’t worry. Your secret is safe with me.”
“What secret?” I took another swig.
