He knelt before her. She focused on the missing bandage. “You need to cover that wound.” She could wrap her head around anatomy. He didn’t pull away as he had earlier. Prodding the reddened edges of the closed wound, she shook her head. “That isn’t possible.”
“As you discovered, there is a lot about me that isn’t possible.”
“Why are you here?” She would have noticed if Jesse had called him. He had never left her side, and the only person he’d called had been his wife.
“I came to give my statement about this afternoon.”
“After your run.” Which meant the other man, Derek, must know about his ability to become a wolf.
He nodded. “If you have any concerns, I won’t hurt you. I can’t.” He stood up and moved away from her. “Let me take you to get your car. If you want, we can talk.”
“Why are you being kind? A couple of hours ago, you couldn’t wait to get me out of your sight.”
“I was able to clear my head. But it appears yours is now muddled.”
“I’m having a hard time coming to terms with what happened tonight. I saw a lot of shit in combat, but that…. I have no words.”
“I’m still the same—”
“Don’t say person. Don’t try to convince me you’re the same person you were before.”
“I was going to say guy.” He offered her help getting to her feet, which she ignored. She wasn’t ready for his touch. She knew only too well what that would do to her. He held the door open for her and, stepping back, gave her the space she so desperately needed.
“Does everyone know?” she asked.
“No. And for the safety of my pack, I need to ask you to keep the information to yourself.”
“Like anyone would believe me.”
Placing his index finger under her chin, he forced her to look at him. “There are many who would believe. They want to find those like me for their own nefarious reasons. We are a strong people, but our weakness is in our numbers.”
“I won’t say anything.”
Knox nodded, holding her gaze. As they left, Jesse came toward them. “You taking her home?”
“I am. Do you need a quick statement from me now?”
He waved them away. “I’ll come by tomorrow and get it from you. Take care of my girl for me.”
“I can take care of myself just fine.”
Jesse kissed her on the forehead “I know you can.”
Knox led her out to a beat-up tow truck, the garage’s number and name painted on the side. He held the door while she climbed in then closed it and headed for his side.
After a few silent miles, Emerson found her voice. “You can’t go to the hospital when you’re injured, can you? If they ran your blood, they would find an abnormality.”
“Abnormal for you, but not for us. And, yes, seeking medical attention has always been a touchy subject. When we can’t get around going to a doctor, we say they cannot take our blood due to religious beliefs.” His fingers tightened on the wheel.
“And you’ve always been…like this?”
“You mean did someone bite me and turn me? No, I was born this way.”
“So when we….”
He gripped the steering wheel so tight she could have sworn she heard a crack. She hadn’t said that right. But there was too much she didn’t understand. And yet, of all the emotions coursing through her, the one she expected was absent. Revulsion.
“Yes, when we made love, I was the beast you saw today, only in a different form.” The cadence of his voice, the way he bit out each syllable made her aware of the true strain he was under. If Jesse was correct and he didn’t hate her, then what did he feel? It must be very potent.
She brushed her fingers over his shoulder. “I don’t think you’re a beast.”
He showed no reaction to her words. Unsure what else to say, she gripped her skirt and watched the white lines in the center of the road. Why didn’t he say something or, at the very least turn on the radio, to kill the terrible silence? But he did neither, leaving her to deal with the questions in her head.
He signaled to turn into the diner parking lot.
“No, Knox,” she said. “Just pull into your garage. This whole evening happened because I dropped my purse with my car keys on your counter when I went in to check on you.”
He grunted but backed into the driveway. The moment he stopped, she hopped out. As she waited for him to join her, a muscle car packed with more skinheads cruised slowly past. Knox arrived at her side and tucked her behind him. One flicked him the middle finger before they burned rubber out of the area.
“Come on, let’s get you inside.”
She nodded. How many members of the neo-nazi group were around there? “Should we call Jesse?”
“No, they would be long gone by the time he got out here. I’ll tell him about it tomorrow. Let’s go inside.” The garage property lay in darkness, but lights from the diner, where a few patrons smiled and ate, spilled into the road.
He escorted her to the back, scanning the area as they went, and unlocked the door. Turning on the lights in the garage, he waved her into the office. The scuff of her shoes on the painted cement floor rang through her head. She grabbed her purse from the counter. And, for a moment, she let the events of the day play in her mind now that the shock of not only learning there were werewolves but that her ex-boyfriend was one had worn off. The fear had been of the unknown, not of Knox. Never really of Knox. What must it be like to find someone to care about and carry that huge burden? How did you tell someone such a secret and expect them to accept it? How must it be to live in fear the truth would be discovered?
“Everything okay?” Light from the shop behind him, shadowed his face.
What would he do if she kissed him? Would he push her away? Could they try again? Was she open to it? Was he?
“Emmy?”
Only two people had ever called her that. Jesse and Knox. One she loved as a brother and one she loved— Holy hell, she still loved him. She dropped her purse on the seat by the door. Cupping his face, she rose on tiptoes and brushed her lips against his. He froze for a second, and she worried she’d misread him. But then strong arms wrapped around her, pulling her against his body, lifting her feet off the ground. The growl deep in his throat reverberated through her.
He worked a hand under her skirt until he could grip her ass then wrapped her legs around his waist. The bright lights of a car pulling into the convenience store parking lot next door broke through her lust haze. “Not out here.”
He took her lips again, walking them both into the garage and away from the large plate glass window of the waiting room. Breaking the kiss and breathing heavy, Knox asked, “What do you want?”
“I want—no, need you.” For years she had woken in a hot sweat of desire from dreams so vivid she had one or two times been in the middle of an orgasm. “I want everything you have to give.”
“Not everything, not this time.” He settled her ass on the edge of the work bench, liberating his hand to work off his shirt and then hers. Her bra followed. “I have dreamt of your breasts for eight years.”
If the hate his eyes held before had singed her, the passion in them now might burn her alive. With a new sense of determination to bend this man to her will, she leaned back, lifted a knee, and placed one foot on his chest, forcing him to take a step back. “Take off my thong.”
Raising an eyebrow, he removed her sandals first. Rough, calloused fingertips grazed the outside of her legs until he touched her hips and placed his pinkies between the silk and her skin. His eyes held hers as he inched the fabric over her ass, down her thighs, and past her toes. He shoved the thong into his back pocket.
With her back against the wall, she placed her heels on the edge of the counter. Knees flung wide, she eased the skirt up, giving him full view. His breath hitched, and he shifted in his tight jeans. Hot breath against her calf sent chills up her naked skin; the rough stubble on his cheek tickled the de
licate skin of her thigh. “Emmy, you are going to be the end of me.”
“Not yet, I hope.”
“Hang on tight.” He wrapped his hands under her thighs, lifting her hips high into the air he brought his mouth down onto her pussy. His tongue lapped, and she reached for something to ground her. Above her head, she grasped a bar and prayed it would support her. She had no idea what the hell it was for, but she was thankful for its presence. His tongue assaulted her clit, lapping and circling until she thought she might lose her mind. The butterflies in her stomach churned until she clenched her pussy hard, trying to hold back, draw out her climax, but then he growled a deep, feral rumble that vibrated through her like a high-powered sex toy.
Panting, she tried to stay in control, but then his tongue entered her and she fell apart, pushing up against his mouth, needing more, yet concerned she couldn’t handle what he could give her. Waves of pleasure rolled through her, her legs closing around his head she tried to find a grounding while he didn’t let up on her. “Too much,” she pleaded
With his fingers bit into her ass, he brought her over the edge. She was barely aware of his lowering her again before lifting her into his arms. She circled his neck as he carried her into the dark back room then laid her in the center of a large bed. “I’m not done with you yet.”
He left her for a second and returned, gloriously naked, to lie between her thighs. His hard cock rubbed against her, causing a series of shivers. “Just wrap those sexy legs around me and hang on for your life.”
With a single thrust, he entered her. She sucked in a breath. As wet as she was, it was no match for eight years of celibacy and a man of his size. His arms slipped under her, gripping her shoulders, pulling her tighter against him. “Ready?”
She nodded against his shoulder and ran her fingers into his hair. He might think he was in control, but she remembered one little thing. Taking his earlobe between her teeth, she nipped him, and he hissed, releasing his beast. His hips flexing, he drove into her over and over, until he growled and paused.
“Don’t stop,” she begged.
“You need to come with me.”
“It’s your turn, Knox.” She pushed her heels into his flanks, driving him on. “Come for me.”
He drove into her again, his cock twitching and the muscles in his back tensing. Her vision, adjusted to the darkness, allowed her to revel in awe when he drew back and howled above her. Thrusting one last time, he came. Reaching up, she cupped his face while he shook until finally collapsing on her. She loved his weight, loved the feel of him covering her. She had missed this, missed him.
Chapter Four
Sunlight peeked through the edges of the cheap blinds covering the single window in the studio apartment. Emerson still slept wrapped in his arms, her head over his heart and her leg over his thigh, dangerously close to his cock. They’d made love three times during the night, but he was far from sated. He played with tendrils of her hair and tried to push down the gnawing fear she would leave again. The first time she had ripped his very soul from her.
“What’s wrong?” Her voice washed over him.
He gazed down at her and forced a smile to his lips. He dropped a kiss to the tip of her nose “Good morning. You hungry?”
“Don’t change the subject.” She rolled to her side. “I know when something bothers you. I can feel it.”
“A lot has changed in twenty-four hours.”
“You mean like you no longer hating me?”
He stared at the ceiling fan, wondering how much to tell her, and whether it mattered anymore if he held anything back. “I never hated you. I wanted to, but I didn’t. I don’t trust that you won’t leave again.”
“Honestly, I don’t know what I am going to do.”
“I know.” But it wasn’t easy to hear her say that.
Silence grew between them. “I applied for a job at the local fire and rescue.”
He couldn’t speak over the knot in his throat. Instead, he drew circles on her back and focused on the rotation of the blades above them.
“Say something.”
“What is it you want? I know what I need. To be honest it’s never been a choice for me. You are my mate, and it’s killing me that you are human.”
She pulled away almost as if he had stuck her. “And you think this is easy for me knowing you are half-human, half-animal?”
He jumped out of bed. “If you were half-animal,” he growled, “you would understand I can’t be without you. You are the moon in my world. You are my everything. Do you know what it was like to come back with dinner to find you gone? Just packed your fucking bags and left?”
“I was scared, overwhelmed.”
“I was crushed. I spent the next month drunk as hell, picking a fight with anyone who would take me on, and the month after that in prison.”
“Prison?”
“I didn’t sleep for fear I would shift. When the full moon came, I hadn’t shifted in weeks. I couldn’t run, I couldn’t— Fuck. I was stuck in a cage with a man who I knew would scream to the world what I was, and it endangered not only my pack but everyone like me. And, worse, I knew my mate was heading to a war zone, and there was nothing I could do about it.”
“Knox.”
“No, let me finish, please.” He cracked his neck. “I came out of that jail cell a changed man. I pushed down my emotions, learned to control my anger. I stayed on the outskirts of my pack. My people are meant to be in packs. We yearn for company. I hated it. I wanted to be alone. I had learned in the worst way to control my beast, but I could never let my guard down. So I walked out a different wolf than when I went in. So don’t be offended I wish you were one of my kind. That I wish you could understand what it’s like to be so drawn to someone you can’t bear to be apart for a few hours, let alone years. Instead, I am condemned to a life of impotence and loneliness.”
He grabbed the jeans from the floor where he had thrown them the night before, pulled them up, and left her gaping after him. He collected her clothing and, for good measure, her purse and returned to find her still sitting on the bed where he had left her. He placed the folded clothing beside her, the purse beside them, and her shoes on the floor. As he turned to leave, he pulled her underwear from his back pocket and laid them with great gentleness on top of her other clothing.
She might feel pulled to him sexually, but she wasn’t connected to him in the deep-seated, soul-binding way he was to her. She never would be. If she didn’t get this job, she would be gone. He knew that deep in his bones. And he would be left again—alone. He must not forget that. He had let a little kernel of hope form. He had done it once before, and he could—no, he would do it again. And yet the kernel of hope, before he snuffed it out, reminded him she might just stay.
***
Showered and dressed, she regarded the studio apartment, no more than a hotel room with a kitchenette. There was nothing personal about the room: gray walls, gray sheets, and yellowed-and-cracked-from-the-sun blinds. She stood in the middle of the room, not ready to face him again. He was right. He did deserve someone who knew her mind and heart. Because the powerful feelings drawing him closer to her also made her claustrophobic. She didn’t know anything about long-term relationships. Her mother had never stayed more than a few months with a man. Even her father hadn’t stuck around long enough for her birth.
She found Knox sitting outside by the fire pit, staring out at the tree line. “Feeling the need to run?”
He didn’t turn. “I always need to run, but it isn’t realistic.”
Gnawing her bottom lip, she sat down on the brick edge of the fire pit in his direct line of vision. “I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have made the comment about you being an animal.”
“Don’t, it—”
“No, you spoke inside. It’s my turn now. You’re right. It would be easier if I was like you. I assume most mates are together for life?”
He nodded.
“I can’t guarantee you that, but I
want you like I have never wanted anyone. I’m willing to try.”
“Don’t. Not for my sake. Do you think I want you here out of pity for me?”
“Now, wait. A lot of mixed emotions are swirling in me, but pity isn’t one of them. You overwhelm me. I guess I need to take things a bit slower.”
He stared at her in blatant disbelief, and she couldn’t blame him. When they were together, the heat could burn the house down. “What shall we do…go on a date? To the movies?”
“I don’t know. I think maybe I should take a few days.”
“I hear ya loud and clear.”
She moved into to touch him, and he pushed back like he had the other day. “So we are back to this?”
“This is who I am. This is who I must be.”
“You weren’t like this yesterday. You were calm and concerned. You were that man I met in Miami. Who came to my rescue when I got caught in the middle of a cat fight and landed on my ass.”
“Yesterday was the perfect storm. I dealt with my emotions, something I hadn’t done in seven years. And, whether either of us likes it, you are my mate. When assholes threaten my mate, I react.”
“Threaten seems a bit strong. It was more intimidation.”
“They threatened you with gang rape. It was very clear.” His voice deepened into menace. “Then I allowed my wolf out and run. Decided I should simply let it play out and perhaps we could go out for dinner. After all, you are the only woman I am able to sleep with.”
“So you were nice to get laid?”
“I was nice because you are my mate, and, no matter what you choose to do, nothing will change it for me. So I could continue to be angry, or I could treat you as my mate should be treated. When I found out you had seen me shift, concern for you was the only thing on my mind.”
“And look, you got laid.”
“And who initiated it? You would think eight years of celibacy would have me throwing you over the hood of your broken car.”
Second Chance Desire (Hot Moon Rising #8) Page 4
