by Joan Kilby
“I need food if we’re going to do this.”
Over lunch at a bistro Hayley brought Jacinta up to date. She swirled her fork in the last strands of creamy pasta. “I just don’t know where it’s heading. I can’t see a happy ending. Adam’s never going to want to live in Hope Mountain, and I don’t want to live anywhere else.”
“Long-distance relationships can work,” Jacinta said dubiously, taking a sip of wine.
“Maybe, but I want children someday. I don’t want my kids to have a long-distance dad.” She put her fork down, the last bite uneaten. “Sometimes I wonder if the only reason we’re having a romance is purely due to circumstance. We both happened to be in the right place at the right time.”
“Serendipity might bring you together but it won’t make your relationship last.”
No, that would take love, commitment and hard work. Did she and Adam have what it took for the long haul, or was this a spring fling, something she would look back on a little sheepishly when she eventually came to her senses?
“I wonder what Molly is going to say?” Jacinta said with more than a smidgen of satisfaction.
That was what Hayley was afraid to find out.
She signaled to the waiter for their bill. “Before I forget, I need to drop something off at the jeweler.”
ADAM SCANNED THE crowd gathered for the memorial service for the bushfires. The residents of Hope Mountain were clustered twenty-deep before a dais next to the cenotaph erected in the public gardens. In the street opposite the park, the bright pine frames of a house under construction contrasted sharply with the blackened timbers of a burned dwelling yet to be torn down. Farther out, the mountains rose around the narrow valley, a reminder of both the isolation that contributed to the tragedy and the close-knit community that had come together to remember their dead.
He spotted Hayley, in a dark skirt and black cardigan over a mauve blouse, standing next to Molly and Rolf. She’d gone into town separately, as she was part of the service.
Summer fidgeted at his side. She wasn’t talking to him. When he’d put on a dark suit, she’d expressed her displeasure with him by wearing jeans and a colored shirt.
“You realize you’re showing disrespect to everyone but me?” he’d told her. “Hayley’s husband died in the fires.”
She’d given him a shrewd, far-too-adult glance. “I don’t know why you’d care about him.” Then she’d wrapped a black armband around her pink-and-yellow sleeve. “For Bailey.”
His heart ached for his daughter, but she refused to accept his condolences. Now Adam tried to put an arm around her but she shrugged him off. Then a microphone screeched, drawing their attention to the dais.
Archie MacDonald was the mayor, a tall, red-faced man of about sixty with a comb-over that lifted in the light breeze. He adjusted the microphone and welcomed the townspeople before introducing his wife, Flora, and a grizzled man in a blue suit named Dave Green who was chairman of the memorial committee. Off to the side, the high school band waited to play with the occasional rattle of drums or quiet toot of a horn.
Adam’s gaze drifted back to Hayley. Her arms were entwined with Molly’s and Rolf’s. Everywhere, people were holding hands or had their arms around each other. Hardly any words had been spoken yet, but the chill mountain air was already thick with emotion.
He felt bad about his fight with Hayley last weekend. All week they’d barely spoken, only seeing each other in passing. She always seemed to have something else to do, either at the café or with Summer and the horses. He had work on the Shanghai development that Lorraine had left him. He still hadn’t made his decision and it weighed on him, especially when his relationship with Hayley was so tenuous. He hadn’t even had a chance to ask her what she’d done with the watch.
“We’re not here to mourn,” Archie MacDonald began, the remnants of a Scottish accent in his rolling r’s. “We’ve mourned every day of our lives since the fires. We’ll mourn for years to come. Today we celebrate. Celebrate the lives of our loved ones and our neighbors, people who lived in this community and will be forever remembered. And now, to read out the names of those who perished, here is Dave Green.”
Dave stepped to the microphone with a long sheet of paper and began reciting the names of Hope Mountain residents who had died in the fires. As he read, a boy from the school band put a violin to his shoulder and played “Danny Boy” softly in the background.
The names went on and on. Dave Green’s voice wavered more than a few times. When he came to the names of his wife and grandchildren, he had to take a moment to regain his composure. Around Adam, people were crying and holding on to one another.
Hayley’s hands were clasped behind her back, and he could see her fingers twisting and untwisting. But her shoulders were straight, and when she turned to comfort Molly as Leif’s name was read, her cheeks were dry, though her face was taut with strain. Adam could only imagine what agonies of the heart she was going through. He didn’t think for one second that Leif cheating on her made his death easier to bear. If anything, the war between hurt, anger and sorrow made healing even more difficult.
Dave stepped back and Archie called on the minister to lead them in the Lord’s Prayer. All heads bowed. The murmur of a multitude of voices reverberated as Adam joined the prayer. He hadn’t lost anyone close to him, but the group’s sorrow swept through him, making his eyes prick. Summer’s head was bowed and this time when he wrapped his arms around her, she didn’t pull away.
When the crowd seemed ready to dissolve in tears, Archie came back to the mike and told a joke that his good friend, Harry, who’d died trying to flee the burning mountain in his car, used to tell down at the pub. It was so unexpected that Adam laughed. Many others did, too.
Archie then called on Dave, who told a cute story about his deceased five-year-old granddaughter. The pride and love in his voice when he spoke of little Maggie trumped grief and made everyone smile. Next, a woman talked about the garden her husband had put in last year and how she thought of him as she made soup from the leeks he’d planted. One by one, people mounted the dais and told story after story of their departed loved ones, building a picture of small-town life, of love and laughter and happiness, of quiet lives filled with family and friends. Adam was first moved and then surprised to feel the mood shift from anguish to near euphoria.
Hayley made her way to the stage. Adam tensed. What would she say? Would her anger come out in her voice? Her hurt? Summer glanced at him, a worried frown creasing her forehead. He squeezed her shoulder. “Hayley’s strong,” he whispered. “She’ll be okay.”
Hayley cleared her throat and wrapped her cardigan closer, looking so slight she might blow away in the gentle breeze. “Leif loved taking people on trail rides, especially into the high country. He was a natural-born storyteller and he had a million stories to recite around the campfire. Some of them were even true.” She paused as a ripple of laughter rolled through the crowd.
“Anyone who went on one of his rides came back raving about the experience. About eight years ago, Dave Green’s nephew, Chris, came out from the city. Chris had never been on a horse before. He was nervous and scared but Leif stuck by his side, teaching and reassuring him. By the end of the trip Chris was hooked on horseback riding. He was a regular all that summer. The next year his parents bought him a horse of his own.” She paused and let her gaze sweep the crowd. “Chris is now on the Australian Olympic Equestrian Team. It might never have happened without Leif. That’s how inspiring my late husband could be.”
Adam thought that was the end. Then she found him in the audience and held his gaze. “This memorial service is about celebration. As a community and as individuals we need to be thinking about the future. I know I am, and I know Leif would have wanted that. For years I was part of Leif’s dream to build a dude ranch. Lately, I’ve realized that I need to follow my own dream.
I’ve decided to go into horse therapy full-time. New funding for Horses for Hope looks likely, thanks in part to Adam Banks.”
She gestured to Adam and the crowd turned to him and clapped. “Adam thinks of himself as an outsider, not part of Hope Mountain. But through his generosity he’s earned a place in all of our hearts.”
“Wow, Dad, did you really help her get Horses for Hope going again?” Summer asked.
Smiling and shaking his head, Adam held up his hands in self-deprecation to the applause. To Summer, he said, “It hasn’t happened yet. All I did was get Graham to write her a grant proposal.”
Hayley was the one with the dream and the determination to achieve it. She was the one making a permanent difference in her community. Unlike himself, contemplating building luxury apartments for complete strangers.
Hayley stepped off the dais and returned to Molly and Rolf. The trio hugged, rocking back and forth. Adam was moved and he admired her even more. Leif had treated her badly, but she’d found the strength to be forgiving enough to talk about her late husband’s good qualities.
The high school band started to play “What a Wonderful World” and a girl with wildly curly dark hair sang the words. After the first verse she encouraged the crowd to sing along to the chorus. Everyone linked arms and lifted their voices.
At his side Summer’s sweet soprano rang out high and clear. Adam glanced down at her. She met his gaze and grinned. Uplifted by the crowd, the song, his daughter’s smile, Adam joined in. It was indeed a wonderful world.
* * *
“EXCUSE ME, MOLLY, ROLF—I’ll see you tonight. Right now I need to talk to someone.” Hayley spied Dave and ran to nab him before he disappeared in the dispersing crowd.
“Dave!” She gave him a hug. “You did really well up there. If you still want horse therapy you’ll be first on my list when I start up again.”
“Thanks, I appreciate that,” Dave said. “Today was good for this town, good for all of us. Chris wanted to be here, but he’s riding in an equestrian event in America.”
“Actually, Dave, I have something I’d like you to give Chris. Leif would’ve wanted him to have something to remember him by.” She pulled the gold watch from the pocket of her sheepskin jacket. “This was Leif’s. Please give it to him the next time you see him.”
Dave turned the watch over in his hands, unaware that the highly polished back had once bore an inscription. The jeweler had done a good job of erasing all traces. “This is an expensive watch. Are you sure?”
“Positive.” She hadn’t been able to think of anything else to do with it. It would mean something to Chris to have a personal item of his mentor’s, and she would be happier knowing it was far away from Hope Mountain. And her.
“Thanks so much. I’ll be seeing him in a couple of weeks at my sister’s birthday party. I’ll give it to him then. I know he’ll cherish it.” Dave hugged her again. “Take care.”
After Dave moved off, Hayley found herself alone at the cenotaph where a single wreath had been laid to mark the victims of the bushfire. She touched a yellow freesia woven into the wreath, releasing its sweet scent. “Goodbye, Leif,” she whispered. “You were a good man even if you weren’t a good husband. I...”
She wanted to forgive him. She desperately wanted to let go of all the negative emotion swirling inside her. But she couldn’t bring herself to say the words. She didn’t feel forgiving. She felt anger and grief and shame.
“Hey, how are you doing?” Adam came up to stand beside her.
Her heart did a little flip at the sound of his voice close to her ear. “I’d been dreading today, but it was okay.”
“I’m sorry about last week—”
“Sorry, I was so—”
They both spoke at the same time and then broke off with sheepish grins. Adam slid his arms around her and drew her close. “I was too harsh. I was reeling from my meeting with Lorraine.”
Hayley waited for him to say more but he just continued holding her as if he’d almost lost her. She leaned into his solid strength. “I was too rash. I shouldn’t have said anything to Summer without running it by you first.”
“We’ll sort it out,” he said into her hair. “I don’t know how, but we will.”
She soaked up his warmth and generosity, wishing with all her heart she could allow herself to fall in love with him. But she was afraid and weak, not the strong, resilient woman he seemed to think she was.
“I was surprised at how uplifting the service was,” Adam said. “Those stories made me cry and laugh at the same time. I can see why this community is special to you.”
“You’re part of it, whether you see yourself that way or not. I know about you dropping cash in the donation jars around town. And helping out here and there.”
“That’s nothing,” he said, waving it away. “But you pricked my conscience by thanking me publicly. So I had a word with the mayor just now and made a more substantial donation to the reconstruction efforts.”
“Adam, that’s fantastic. Thank you. They’ll probably name a building after you.”
He brushed a strand of hair off her face. “Sounds like they should name it after Leif. I found it hard to hold on to my dislike of the guy when you told the story of him mentoring that boy.”
Hayley shrugged. “No one’s all good or all bad. Everyone loved Leif.”
“You’re very generous but it’s to your credit.” He kissed her lightly on the lips. “Want to get some lunch?”
“Can’t. I have things to do this afternoon.” She met his gaze. “But I’m looking forward to the dance tonight.”
He leaned closer and whispered in her ear, “I’m looking forward to after.”
Her pulse quickened at the rough timbre of his voice and his warm breath tickling her ear. “After?”
“I’ve been thinking about you, about us, all week. It’s time we stopped letting our doubts hold us back. Time we stopped circling around each other and found out whether we’ve got something worth fighting for.”
She smiled slowly. “Maybe you’re right.”
“Dad!” Summer hurried toward them along the path through the park. Zoe followed, hanging back.
Hayley eased out of Adam’s arms as the girl came closer. In spite of Summer’s endorsement of her as a candidate for her father’s affections, Hayley didn’t feel comfortable with her seeing them being affectionate. Until Hayley knew where this was going, she wanted to be discreet.
“Can Zoe stay at our house tonight after the dance?” Summer asked.
“Tonight?” He threw a glance at Hayley. “I don’t know....”
“We want to be near Jewel. We’ll sleep in the barn.” Summer put her hands together below her chin. “Please.”
“Oh, the barn. I guess that would be okay.” He put on a stern expression. “You can’t be running in and out of the house all night, though.”
Hayley bit back a smile and kept her gaze cast down.
“We won’t,” Summer promised fervently.
“And don’t stay up all night talking.”
“Da-ad. We’re not nine years old.”
Adam turned to Hayley. “Does that mean, of course, they’re going to stay up all night talking?”
“I think so,” she said, laughing. “You’re just not allowed to tell them not to anymore.”
“Well, okay then—Zoe can spend the night. Do you ladies want to grab some lunch?”
Summer glanced uncertainly at Hayley. “I, uh...”
“Summer and I have plans,” Hayley said smoothly. She glanced at her watch. “In fact, we should get going.”
“I’ll just tell Zoe it’s okay.” Summer ran to her friend.
“What are you two up to?” Adam asked.
“Oh, this and that. Girl stuff.” Hayley couldn�
�t look him in the eye. Not because she thought she was doing anything wrong, but she was afraid he would think she was.
“Okay.” Adam looked puzzled but thankfully didn’t ask any more questions. “I’ll see you back at the house.”
“Did I mention we’re picking up Jacinta tonight? She doesn’t have a date, and I don’t want her to have to go alone.”
“That’s fine. Is she coming for a sleepover, too?”
Hayley grinned. “Over my dead body.”
“Good. Not that I have anything against Jacinta, but tonight I want you all to myself.” His smile faded. “Is that possible, to have no ghosts in the room?”
She took the open sides of his jacket in both hands and pulled him down for a brief but emphatic kiss. “No ghosts. Just you and me.”
CHAPTER FOURTEEN
WHY WAS THE doctor taking so long with Summer?
Hayley leafed through a women’s magazine in the waiting room, barely seeing the airbrushed celebrity photos. Earlier in the week she’d brought Summer to the clinic for blood tests. Today they would hear the results.
Hayley kept telling herself Summer was going to be fine. The girl’s overactive imagination and guilty feelings had combined to make her think she could have an STD when she more than likely did not.
But what if Summer did have something that needed treating? She was a minor. It wouldn’t be right to keep taking her to the clinic behind Adam’s back. If he found out she’d kept this from him he would be furious, and rightly so.
Hayley flipped pages. She wouldn’t worry about that now.
A door down the corridor opened and Summer came out. “Thanks, Dr. Margolis,” she said to the young female doctor.
Hayley rose, scanning Summer’s face for clues as to the results of the blood tests, but the girl was remarkably good at hiding her feelings when she wanted to.
“We can go now.” Summer headed straight for the exit.
Hayley quickly paid the bill and caught up with her in the gravel parking lot. “Well?”
“I’m clear.” Summer burst into tears and buried her face in her hands. The tears were short-lived as she wiped them away and breathed a huge sigh of relief. “That was so embarrassing. I never want to answer questions like that again.”
