“Sorry.”
Jared poked at Benjamin’s chest and Benjamin gritted his teeth. It didn’t hurt as much as it had the first few days after he’d woken up, but it still wasn’t a walk in the park.
“You’re lucky you only went next door to Dominic’s office,” Jared said. “I don’t even want to think about what would have happened if you’d managed to get upstairs.”
Benjamin risked a glance downward. He was surprised that while the wound higher on his chest still looked pretty much like it had the day before, the other ones were almost healed, the stitches gone. They were still puckered, but they were scarring, and he didn’t think they’d open again. He wasn’t about to test it, though.
“You’re lucky,” Jared said as he straightened. “You could have prolonged your stay here, but you look fine.”
“Does it mean I can go to my room?”
“Not on your own. You can’t do stairs for a few more days, or anything strenuous.” Jared grinned. “That means sex too.”
Benjamin didn’t like his pale skin. He could feel his cheeks heat at Jared’s words, and he knew Jared was getting a little revenge. “I’m not about to have sex,” Benjamin grumbled.
“That’s what you think, but I’m mated. I know exactly how it goes. At least Lucas looks like he’d rather die than hurt you.”
Benjamin hated the fact that he could barely remember his mate. He wished he’d met Lucas in other circumstances. “You mentioned my catheter in front of him,” he said with a groan.
Jared’s smile grew. “Yup.”
“Why would you do something like that?”
“Well, I didn’t know he was your mate.”
Benjamin glared. “You’d have done it even if you had.”
“I was angry, and scared for you.”
Benjamin sighed. “Sorry. That was a bad idea.”
“Damn right it was.”
“I won’t do it again.” The if you let me go back to my room was left unsaid, but Jared was anything but stupid, and he narrowed his eyes.
“I already told you that you could go back. I’m sure Lucas won’t have any problems carrying you up and down the stairs.”
Benjamin wished he remembered more of his mate. “He’s really tall.”
“He is. I think he has at least a foot on you.”
Benjamin groaned. “Great. I probably look like a kid next to him.”
“Oh, I don’t know. You didn’t look like a kid when you were trying to climb him earlier.”
“Climb him?” Benjamin certainly didn’t remember that.
“You were cute all pressed up against his chest.”
“I embarrassed myself.”
“Not really. He didn’t seem to mind.”
Jared left the healed wounds uncovered, but he covered the deeper one again. “Noem will come by your room tomorrow and heal the wound again. I think it’ll be the last time, unless he decides to try to heal the scars. You should be good to go after that, although please take it easy for at least a week. You need rest. It wasn’t only your body that was hurt, Benjamin.”
Benjamin wasn’t sure what to say to that, so he kept his mouth shut as Jared worked. Someone knocked on the door, and Benjamin realized it was still open and that he was wearing the hospital gown around his armpits. At least his dick was hidden under the sheet, but still. He wasn’t about to win the sexiest man of the year award, and of course it was Lucas at the door.
“Hey,” Lucas said, his voice surprisingly soft for a man as big as he was, and damn, he really was huge.
“Hi,” Benjamin squeaked, suddenly hating himself.
Lucas looked from Jared to Benjamin. “How are you feeling?”
“I’m fine.”
Lucas looked at Jared for confirmation and Benjamin narrowed his eyes. “Really.”
Lucas nodded. “I just wanted to know if Jared was almost done. We need to talk, I think.”
Benjamin hated those words, because they never brought anything good. “Are you dumping me?” he blurted out.
Lucas blinked. “Dumping you? Shouldn’t we have to be together for me to dump you?”
“Not really. You’re my mate, so it’s kind of implied that we’re together, even if we haven’t talked about it. Is that what you want to talk about? That you don’t want to be my mate? Is it because I’m a shifter, or is it because I’m me?”
Jared looked at Benjamin with wide eyes. “Who are you, and what did you do with Benjamin?” he asked.
Benjamin frowned. “Did you hit your head?”
“You never talk this much. I swear sometimes it’s a miracle to get an entire sentence out of you, and you just babbled. You sounded like Jayden.”
Benjamin hissed, but Lucas laughed. “It’s true,” he told Benjamin. “You did sound a bit like him.”
“You know Jayden?”
“I live with him.”
Benjamin thought about that and realized he knew who Lucas was. “You’re Heath’s human best friend.”
Lucas grinned. “I am, and I’m not dumping you.”
The knot in Benjamin’s chest loosened and he breathed out. His mate wasn’t rejecting him. It was a start. A good one.
Jared pulled down Benjamin’s hospital gown. “I’m done. I’ll leave you two to talk. Call me when you’re done and we’ll get you back to your room.”
Jared left and closed the door behind himself, leaving Benjamin alone with Lucas. The silence was awkward, and Benjamin wished the painkillers were still in his system. He could have paid to feel even a tiny bit loopy at the moment.
He wasn’t the most open and fun person on the best of days, and this definitely wasn’t a good day.
Lucas moved, dragging the chair next to Benjamin’s bed closer to him, close enough that Benjamin would only have to reach out to touch him. He wanted to do just that, but instead he gripped the sheet and kept his hands in his lap. He waited for Lucas to start talking, but Lucas just settled in the chair, looking completely relaxed.
Lucas was human. He knew what mates were, but he didn’t feel the compelling instinct to do something about it, to be with Benjamin, not like Benjamin did. Benjamin had nothing against humans, but damn, he wished he had a shifter mate. He wouldn’t feel so lost if he did.
“So,” Lucas finally said. “We’re mates.”
* * * *
That sounded stupid to Lucas’ ears, and he wished he could take the words back. Of course they were mates, not that he’d know anything about it.
“Yes,” Benjamin said.
That was it. He didn’t add anything, and Lucas wished he had, because he was grasping at straws there. “I’m human,” he finally said.
“I know.”
“I know shifters can have human mates.” He knew because Dominic had just told him, and because Jayden had yapped his ears off for months about it. He hadn’t really listened to Jayden, because the guy talked too much, and if Lucas had to listen to every word he said, it would be the only thing he’d do all day.
It had been easy to tune Jayden out and to avoid thinking about how Lucas might be a shifter’s mate, but it had been different with Dominic, and not only because Lucas had already known he was Benjamin’s mate. Talking with Dominic had made it sound so much more real, and Lucas was still trying to wrap his mind around it.
“Of course they can.”
Lucas nodded. “I don’t know much about you guys.”
“Don’t you live with Jayden and Heath?”
“I do. I talked with Heath after I found out about him, but we never really talked about mates.”
“Not even after he met Jayden?”
Lucas shrugged. “He didn’t recognize me then, so no.”
Benjamin tried to lean closer, and Lucas watched him to make sure he wasn’t in pain. He winced, but it was a small gesture, and Lucas decided to let him be.
“He still doesn’t recognize you?” Benjamin asked.
; “No. The doctors said he’d probably never recover his memories, but he’s creating new ones, so it’s fine.”
“Still. It has to be hard to lose your best friend like that.”
Lucas had gotten used to the idea over the past few months. It was sad, but he hadn’t completely lost Heath, not like Will had. He could still be friends with Heath, and be a part of his life. He could still see that Heath was happy with Jayden and with the half-new life he was building, and it was enough.
“We’re fine. We live together, and we’re growing close. It’s not the same, but it’s good anyway.”
Benjamin nodded and silence fell. Lucas knew they should talk about them being mates. He knew what it meant, but even though he’d kind of wished something like this would happen, that he’d find himself being a shifter’s mate, he couldn’t deny it made his life harder. It was so much easier to keep his mouth shut.
“What happened?” he asked instead. “How did you get hurt?”
Benjamin shrugged. “Tried to play hero. Never again.”
“Where is the person who stabbed you?”
“Hopefully six feet under.” Lucas’ eyes widened and Benjamin paled. “I didn’t mean to say that. I mean, I know I killed him, so I know he’s dead. I’m not a monster. I wouldn’t have hurt him if I hadn’t had a good reason, like, you know. Trying to stay alive.”
“I never said you were a monster,” Lucas said softly. Maybe it was a good idea to talk about them being mates instead of this. Benjamin looked like he wanted to run away, and Lucas couldn’t allow that. He didn’t want Benjamin to get hurt again.
“What are we going to do?” he asked.
Benjamin relaxed, his fingers unclenching around the sheet. “About being mates?”
“Yeah.”
“Well, I guess we should date or something.”
“I thought shifters wanted to mate right away.”
Benjamin cocked his head. “Is that something you want to do? I mean, I thought humans wanted to date and to get to know each other before getting married, because you know, mating is even worse than that. Well, not worse, but mating is forever. No divorce. You’d be stuck with me forever, and it’d be a long forever since shifters and their mates live more than a hundred years.”
Benjamin paused to breathe, and Lucas pressed his fingers against Benjamin’s lips. Benjamin froze and Lucas smiled at him before moving his hand away. “I won’t deny this is going way too fast for me to be able to make a decision right now,” he said.
Benjamin nodded. “I’m a shifter and it’s still a bit fast for me.”
“I suppose we could date, but I don’t live here.”
Benjamin’s smile fell. “Does it mean you’re rejecting me?”
“No. You’re still hurt, and you need rest, right?”
“Yes.”
“How do you feel about horses?”
Lucas knew it was a shot in the dark. Benjamin was used to living in the mansion with all those people around, so he’d probably say no to moving in with Lucas at the ranch. Lucas didn’t blame him. Not everyone enjoyed the quiet and calm life he had, but he hoped Benjamin wasn’t one of those guys who went dancing every week, because that wasn’t Lucas.
He wouldn’t try to make Benjamin change, and he wouldn’t mind it if Benjamin had a life away from him, of course he wouldn’t, but he didn’t think things between them would work if they were too different. He’d tried that, albeit with another human, and things hadn’t worked.
“Horses? Like, shifters?”
Lucas laughed. “No, real horses. Heath and I have a ranch. It’s not too far from here, and winter is kind of a down season, although we have sleighs and everything. But anyway, I can’t really spend much time away from the ranch. I could come here every so often to see you, of course, but... ”
“Are you asking me to move in with you?” Benjamin’s eyes were wide, but he didn’t look opposed to the idea.
“I guess. That way you’d be able to rest, although you’d be away from your friends. We’ll come back here for Christmas and whatever, of course.”
“Where will I sleep?”
“The ground floor is all in common with Heath and Jayden, but the top one is divided in two. Heath and I both have a guest room, so you can choose. You don’t have to stay in my side of the house if you don’t want to.”
Lucas knew it was because they were mates, but he really wanted Benjamin to stay in his side of the house, in his room if he had anything to say about it.
“I’d like that.”
Lucas blinked. “You want to move to the ranch?”
Benjamin frowned. “You just asked me if I wanted to.”
“Yeah. I wasn’t sure you’d say yes, though. We don’t know each other, and I’m sure you’ll miss your friends here.”
Benjamin waved. “They can come see me when they want to. Right?”
“Of course they can. If you move in, the ranch will be your home. You can do whatever you want.”
Benjamin slowly nodded. “Will it be only until I get better?”
“You can stay as long as you want. I don’t know how things are going to go between us, but, well, I’ve seen Heath and Jayden, and they look very happy.”
“We can be happy too. We’re soul mates.”
“You’ll have to explain what it means.”
“I thought you’d seen Jayden and Heath together.”
“It’s not the same. They make it look easy, but I know it’s not, especially not with Heath’s memory problem.”
Benjamin nodded again. “It’s hard work, just like any relationship, but if we really want it to work... ”
Lucas reached for Benjamin’s hand. He let his hand hover a few inches away from Benjamin’s, because he didn’t want to be a jerk and just grab his hand, but Benjamin smiled and put his hand into Lucas’.
They both looked at their united hands, and they couldn’t have been more different. Benjamin’s hand was small and soft while Lucas’ was big and rough from work.
He hoped they’d make it work anyway, because he wanted it, so much.
Chapter Three
Lucas hovered over Benjamin, and Benjamin was both irritated and happy about it. He really should make up his mind, but his thoughts were still a jumble of so many different things that he found it easier to just go with what he felt. Lucas didn’t have to be there, after all. He was human, so it wouldn’t be a problem for him to just walk away and never look back.
Not that Benjamin thought he’d do that. Lucas seemed to have made a decision—to stick with Benjamin. They hadn’t talked about mating yet, or about anything other than Benjamin moving in with Lucas. They hadn’t really had the time, because as soon as Benjamin had agreed to move in with Lucas, Lucas had fetched Jared and told him about it. He’d wanted to be sure it was okay, and Jared had looked worried. It was probably at the thought that he wouldn’t be close in case Benjamin needed him, and it made Benjamin feel a tiny bit guilty because he’d ignored it.
He knew he hadn’t been the easiest patient, especially not with his running away stunt, but really, who would have been happy to be stuck in the infirmary for more than a week?
“Call if you need anything,” Jared said as he made sure Benjamin’s wounds were as fine as they could be.
“You already said that more than a few times.”
“I know, but you’re going to be too far away for me to do anything if something happens.”
“He needs to stay here?” Lucas asked, and Benjamin knew he was already rethinking their decision. He wished he could say something, but he didn’t want to, not in front of Jared.
“It would be better,” Jared said. “He’s fine, or as fine as he can be a week after being stabbed multiple times and killing a man, but it doesn’t mean he’s completely healed.”
Benjamin could see the conflict in Lucas’ eyes and he sighed. He was probably about to lose his mate, at least until he was wel
l enough that Jared could let him out of his sight.
Someone knocked at the door and the three of them turned to look. Jayden was there, his eyes wide, his gaze moving from Lucas to Benjamin them back to Lucas. “Uh, Heath and me were looking for you.”
“You found me,” Lucas said, not moving from Benjamin’s side.
“I’ll text him to tell him you’re here.”
“Sure.”
Jayden slowly nodded and took his phone out. The text was so long there was no way he was just telling Heath about where they were, and Benjamin could imagine what exactly he was writing.
Sure enough, he heard the infirmary door open a few minutes later and steps hurrying toward his room. The door was still open and Heath came in, looking around as soon as he entered. “Lucas,” he said.
Jared cleared his throat. “I’m done. Benjamin, you can travel if you really need to, but I think you should stay in the mansion. I can’t force you, of course, but I’d like to have you close, just in case.”
Benjamin nodded because it wasn’t like he could have a tantrum. “I’ll talk to Lucas some more and we’ll make a decision. I’ll let you know.”
Jared nodded. “You can go back to your own room as soon as you want to. I’ll come see you there if you decide to stay in Whitedell. You have my number.”
“Yeah. Thanks.”
Jared left them and closed the door as he stepped out. Everyone was silent for a few moments, which in Jayden’s case was a miracle, but of course, he was the one to break it. “You guys need to tell me what’s going on before I make assumptions and start planning a party.”
“That’s a very serious threat,” Heath said. “You should listen to him and spill the beans.”
Benjamin looked at Lucas. He didn’t care if people found out about them being mates. In fact, he wanted everyone to know it, because Lucas was as close to perfection as anyone could be, and he was Benjamin’s. Benjamin wasn’t alone anymore, finally, and he was still having a hard time believing it. Maybe telling other people would make it easier to believe.
Lucas smiled and turned back to Jayden. “Turns out I’m a shifter’s mate after all.”
Benjamin Page 4
