by Nicole Casey
If he had known about us wasting all that candlelight, there would have been hell to pay most certainly but once he was out, he was out.
My father was a hard-drinking man, something which eventually caught up with him and he succumbed to cirrhosis of the liver when he was my age, thirty-two.
By then, my mom had become a frail, shadow of her former springtime self and three months to the day after we put Jacob in the ground, she also died.
I was the only one in attendance for her burial.
But before she died, she made me promise that I would not stay in the mountains living in squalor.
“You must do better for yourself, Harding. Your father was a stubborn man who refused to accept a hand when it was offered. You cannot allow your pride to do that to you. I gave you my family name because it is a proud name, a successful name. Honor it and do something with it.”
I had laughed aloud.
“Mama, I don’t have an education,” I reminded her. “And I happen to like living up here.”
I didn’t tell her that the thought of living among the townsfolk, even if it was possible, made me dizzy with apprehension.
I liked dogs, not people.
“You must promise me you will find a way, Harding. I have spent thirty years holding my tongue and allowing your father to do what he wanted. Lord knows I loved that man from the second I laid eyes on him until this very second but the time for change is now and you must embrace it. Promise me.”
In the end, I had no choice but to make her the promise so she could die in peace.
To this day, I’m not sure what killed her.
There was no autopsy or doctor’s report.
We didn’t have money for that.
The Jacksons didn’t exist to the rest of the world.
We were just mountain people to the few who might be able to identify us in passing but we were nobodies and when we died, no one noticed.
But I noticed when my mom died. Suddenly I was on my own, living in that dilapidated shack on Black Mountain, my parents buried deep in the ravine where I could visit them when I got lonely.
But I fulfilled my promise to mom, kind of.
Taking the step into the real world had proven almost unbearable but finding the job had been the easiest thing I had ever done.
Wearing the cleanest shirt I owned, I trekked into Cedar City, a task which took me half the day and asked where I might find me one of those job things.
The answer had always been the same; the oil fields. They hire anyone.
And the rumors had been true.
I was instantly granted a job as a roughneck.
The pay was stunning and as the money began to pour in, I wondered why my dad had not taken a real job to support us many years earlier.
But I could never bring myself to leave the leaky cabin, not when I knew that was where I belonged.
Instead, I began to fix up the shack and in a relatively short period of time, it was equipped with everything I had always thought was too extravagant to own.
Like a toilet.
Currently, I was adding a second-floor extension but it was taking more time that I had expected because I was doing it alone.
I didn’t want strangers in my haven and it was all things I could do alone but between work and hunting, it was a slow process.
Backing my Ford F150 out of the dirt laneway, I eyed the blue tarps flapping in the gentle October breeze.
Maybe I shouldn’t have agreed to work weekends, even with the overtime. I wanted to get the extension finished before the first frost or else my heating costs were going to skyrocket but it was a catch 22. If I didn’t work, I wouldn’t have the money to conquer the project either.
I’d figure something out.
Anxiously I realized that I would have to hire someone if it got to be too late in the year.
And who knew when the first snow would come? It was already the beginning of October. It wasn’t unheard of for the white stuff to fall already.
Fleetingly I thought of Aaron Jessup and rolled my green eyes heavenward.
If all else fails, you can just ask him to help you out, I thought wryly. The overeager kid was always offering his assistance as if we were old buddies or something.
I steered the massive truck down the winding mountain roads, my mind on how to finish the project with such little time.
I was almost at the bottom of the unmanned road when I saw her.
She startled the hell out of me, jumping over the guardrail as she heard my vehicle rumbling by.
What the hell is she doing out here by herself? I wondered, eyeing her through my peripheral vision as I drove past. It’s a little early for Halloween.
Every so often I would see a teenager thrill seeking or hikers in my neck of the woods and it always upset me.
That area was not safe for people who didn’t know the terrain and moreover, they were dangerously close to my home.
As I continued forward, I peered at the pale blonde through my rear-view mirror and she seemed to be staring after me but her expression was already lost as I took another curve and headed toward the fields.
There was something odd about her, besides the fact that she didn’t belong out there but whatever it was had already escaped me.
I didn’t waste any more time thinking about it, even though I could not shake the smidgen of alarm tickling my mind.
Whoever she was, she wasn’t my problem.
I had enough to worry about without bothering myself with stray kids.
2
Eloise
I was hungry, cold and terrified but I couldn’t be certain which one took precedence.
I also had no idea where I was or what I was doing out there in the wilderness.
This was stupid, rash and incredibly dangerous, I chided myself but it was far too late for regrets.
If I returned home, the punishment would be worse than anything I could possibly imagine.
Yet at that point, I didn’t care.
If I’d had any idea in which direction home was, I would have run straight back there.
Or would I?
I knew I was going to die if I didn’t find shelter and food.
If I had known which direction to take to make my way back, I would have taken it but there was no indication to guide me.
Leaving in the dead of night had seemed like a good idea at the time, the cloak of darkness keeping me hidden from anyone who might learn I was missing.
Like Lucy or Randolph…or mom and Sir.
I shuddered, pushing the thought of what I had left behind out of my half-delirious mind.
No, I vowed to myself. I must keep going forward.
I had no idea how long I had been clawing through the woods, my sense of direction skewed at best.
Never had I ventured this far from home in my life.
I had no idea where I was or if I was heading toward civilization.
I wasn’t sure I wanted to be around other people.
There would be questions, ones I had no idea how to answer.
Leaving in such an irrational haste, I had not thought to bring anything with me.
My cloak seemed useless against the intense chill in the air and I felt like I had been walking for days, twigs and leaves catching in my too-long mass of burnt honey hair.
I was scratched on every exposed piece of flesh and eventually, sobs began to overtake any reason I had been clinging to as I fought through the thick of trees.
It was then I saw the cabin, my heart ready to burst with relief.
I could knock on the door, ask for food and water, maybe –
The crack of branches and a feral growl caused me to gasp and I was suddenly staring at the huge head of a mixed breed dog, his teeth baring as he advanced of me.
I choked in shock, never having seen a real dog before.
We didn’t have those where I came from.
No pets, only livestock.
Pets created unre
alistic bonds. That’s what Sir said.
But why was I thinking about Sir when this beast was about to devour me whole?
He seemed a monster as he drew near and I backed up, too exhausted to run.
I am going to die here, I thought mournfully, tears beginning to streak my cheeks again.
That was when the other dog appeared and I knew then it was over.
I sank to my knees, waiting for the gnash which would tear at my skin but to my surprise, both animals simply stood in their spots, continuing to howl endlessly.
“Jesus Christ, Rufus! Shut up!”
The sound of a human voice both gave me hope and terrorized me simultaneously.
The man did not sound pleasant in the least but perhaps he could call off the dogs.
If possible, the hound whined louder and I was at a loss at what to do.
Should I make myself known or stay hidden?
What had I done? I had left one awful situation, only to enter another one. I was too inexperienced to have run off alone like that and now I was going to suffer the consequences of my actions, one way or another.
The second dog drew closer and I could see he was far more intense than the first, his white teeth gleaming against the night as if he intended to eat me whole.
“Rufus, if I have to come out there, I’m gonna feed you to the fucking coyotes, I swear on your life!”
I waited as both animals seemed to pause uncertainly, glancing back to look toward the cottage and I knew it was my opportunity to flee.
Jumping to my feet, I rushed toward the nearest tree, scrambling to climb it as they pounced forward, both a mass of hysterics.
I watched as the front door to the cabin flew open and my breath caught in my throat.
A half-naked man stood on the porch, his olive skin gleaming in the moonlight.
He was bigger than any person I had ever seen, certainly larger than Sir by at least four inches.
I could make out the definition of his perfectly sculpted abs even in the blackness and as he turned his bearded face about to seek the cause of the disturbance, I could see that his eyes were some glimmering metallic shade.
But despite his imposing and dark attractiveness, I was fixated on something else.
He held a rifle in his hands and I could sense that he was ready to use it at the first sign of movement.
I willed myself to remain perfectly still even though I wanted nothing more than to run, bawling from the spot.
“Come!” he commanded his voice a deep, sonorous pitch which I could feel in my soul.
The dogs joined him instantly, forsaking my location at once.
I was awed by the dominance he exuded, a peculiar feeling seizing me above my fear as I watched in fascination.
The first dog who had approached me let out another loud yip and the man scowled.
“Rufus, shut up!” he growled.
Suddenly, Rufus stopped barking and sniffed the air as if he had lost my scent somehow.
I exhaled slowly, wondering if I had narrowly escaped a certain death.
I watched as he continued conversing with the dogs.
“Well?” he demanded. “All done now?”
Rufus dropped his eyes and sighed as if begrudgingly resigning his search. I found myself also releasing a breath of air as the stranger leaned forward to scratch the dog’s black skull.
More relief flooded me as I watched him sling the gun over his shoulder by the strap.
“Can I go back to bed now?”
As if to give his consent, Rufus started toward the door, the other canine on his heels.
I wondered what it would be like to go inside with them where it was warm and there might be food.
He was unlike any man I had ever seen before, his face amass with thick, black facial hair to match the waves on his head.
Although the details of his face were hazy from the night, I could see he was incredibly handsome.
I wondered what it would be like to sleep in a bed with a man that size.
I imagined it would be warm and safe and suddenly I wanted nothing more than to knock on his door and beg him to let me do precisely that.
The uncharacteristically wicked thought filled me with shame and I scrambled down the tree to rush away from my sinful ideas.
I wouldn’t even get past the threshold.
He had guns in his house and –
I heard the dogs begin to bark again and I realized that my movement had roused them from whatever uneasy peace they had fallen into.
I had to keep moving before I was found out and I ran away from the cabin, my heart pounding so loudly, I was sure he would hear it as I did.
Certain I was far enough away, I paused to catch my breath.
That was when the shot rang out and I squealed, bolting deeper into the ravine.
Obviously, I was not going to find a friend in that man.
I found my way to a hollowed-out tree trunk and hunkered inside, hoping that the confined space would serve to preserve some of the body heat I so desperately needed.
I couldn’t continue to claw my way through the dark, not knowing what else I might encounter in the woods.
My fear of both the nocturnal animals and who else I might encounter kept my pulse racing.
Albeit exhausted, I was too hungry and cold to entertain the thought of sleep and yet as I wedged myself in the space, I was asleep in minutes.
I dreamt that Sir, the mountain man, and a coyote had me surrounded by the tree.
“You have nowhere to run,” the man told me. “You have to pick one of us to go with.”
I shook my head in terror.
“Just let me go!” I cried, my hands trembling with cold and horror.
“You belong with us,” Sir told me, reaching a hand toward me. I drew back further into the wood and the coyote snarled, approaching.
Behind me, I heard the man’s dogs barking and I realized there was nowhere to run.
“You must make a choice,” he told me, shaking his head. “Choose one of us. It is the only way you will get out of here alive.”
“No!” I sobbed. “Please, just let me go!”
“Where will you go?” Sir asked conversationally. “There is nowhere you can go that I won’t find you.”
In my heart, I knew he was speaking the truth.
“Just pick someone,” the man snapped, his patience wearing thin. “Go with the coyote if you can’t decide.”
I was blinded by tears as I looked from Sir to the stranger and then to the bloodthirsty coyote.
Inhaling sharply, I looked at the mountain man.
“I choose you,” I whispered. “Please help me.”
They both began to laugh, the sound sinister and cruel.
I knew I made the wrong decision and I began to scream as he reached forward to seize my arm.
“No!” I moaned, waving my head wildly. “No, leave me alone!”
My coffee-colored eyes fluttered open and I realized that dawn had broken through, a gray, cold morning without promise.
But at least I could see and I was alone. Sir was not there and there was no beast ready to eat me.
I could not help but feel slightly disappointed that the man from the cabin was also not there.
You are not thinking rationally. That man is dangerous. You must find another way to get out of these mountains and far away from Sir before he follows through with his plans for you.
I had been lucky it had not happened, a fluke of nature deterring the plans but if I had stayed, my life would be irrevocably changed forever.
There had been no choice but to run.
I thought of my mother and Jillian, my stomach churning nervously.
Had running away put my mother and sister in danger?
It was too much to worry about at that moment. I had to keep going until I found shelter and safety. Then I could worry about Jillian.
My mother knew what she was doing.
It was her fault I was r
unning scared at that moment. What kind of woman puts her own children into such a situation?
A wave of bitterness swept through me as I thought of what she had conspired to do.
How could she? What hold does Sir have on her to allow for this to happen?
But even as I thought it, I wondered how I could not have seen it myself.
I shoved the self-doubt and anxiety from my mind and forced myself to concentrate on my immediate plight.
As I rose from my hiding spot, I brushed the leaves off my cloak and dress, inhaling sharply as I tried to orient myself toward a road.
If I found a road, it would have to lead somewhere, wouldn’t it? Perhaps a town or…
I didn’t know. I had no plan, no money, no supplies.
What had I been thinking?
I was lucky I had made it that far although how I had done it was beyond my comprehension.
And I hadn’t even been on the run for a full day.
The realization that I might die suddenly hit me with force and a panic gripped me horrifically as I struggled to keep it together.
I walked, remembering that the cabin was behind me.
That man was the first sign of life I had seen since leaving and he might be my only shot to survival.
I had to turn around. It was the most logical thing to do.
He shot at you. Those dogs want to eat you, I reminded myself, still forging forward, my eyes scanning the trees for something to put in my belly.
I knew enough about the flora in the region not to eat poisonous berries but I couldn’t see anything at all, toxic or not.
How long can someone go without food or –
I gasped as the trees opened and I was facing a dirt road ahead.
I had found a road!
My heart was pounding in my chest as I scurried onto the laneway, my head darting up and down the winding pathway, hoping to see a vehicle.
Of course, there was no one in sight but that was all right.
I was just going to walk until someone came. I could ask for a ride into town and…well, I would figure out a plan as I moved.
My legs felt like leaden weights as I moved, the combination of weakness and worry eroding my energy.
