by Bellus, HJ
I nudge Chili into a trot over to the calf and horse. Mav keeps his rope pulled tight and I can tell the horse he’s on is smoking good as he obeys each one of Mav’s commands, never giving him hell.
I hop off Chili, flank the calf and toss him to the ground and make sure all the medication goes in, and then unhook the rope from the calf’s neck and set him free.
“Just like that, Mav.”
“Are there more?”
I shake my head and laugh at his enthusiasm. “Not today, but never fear, there’s a lot of roping to be done on this ranch.”
“I’m your man.” He smiles over at me. “And when do you think I can start riding steers or something?”
“It sounds like we have some working to do on your mother first. Let’s just take baby steps toward that.”
“Got it.”
We ride in silence before I find the courage to bring up the fact I want to be his dad. I try several times to get it out, but each time the words get stuck.
“Mav, I have a question.”
“What’s that?”
I nearly ask him his favorite kind of ice cream, chickening out again.
“Think you’ll be okay living here?”
“Oh yeah, but there’s just one thing.”
“What’s that?” I see the corrals up in the distance and bring Chili to a stop. Mav does the same thing.
“I mean, Mom is having your babies. My dad didn’t want me, and I don’t really understand why. I fit in here but just don’t know…” He bows his head, avoiding eye contact.
“You don’t know what, Mav? Go on and say it.”
“I just don’t understand why you’d want to be my father when we aren’t even related.”
His statement is crushing. I take a long moment to gather the perfect words to express my true feelings.
“I’ll tell you this one thing, Mav, and it won’t be the last time I say it to you. Love doesn’t follow the rules or view life the way our eyes see it. What I want most in the world is to be your father. I love you and will give you anything you need. I’ll protect your mother. My blood may not flow in your veins, but my love does.”
I watch him nod and soak up my words.
“My heart chose you and I’m honored to have such a fine cowboy as my namesake.”
He repeats in a low whisper, “I want to be your son, Maverik.”
My chest swells with pride and I tip my hat to him. “Some things in life are simple to explain while others make no sense. You just have to trust your cowboy roots.”
“Thanks, Dad.”
“Don’t you ever forget that I’m here for you, son. Your uncles and Granddad are all here for you. Always come to us.”
“I will.”
He kicks Arsine into a run and turns back in his saddle. “Let’s race, old man.”
I chuckle and then nudge Chili into a run, knowing he’ll never be able to catch up with the speed of a younger horse, but it doesn’t stop me from trying.
“I’m on your tail, boy.”
I’m shocked when our horses are nose to nose with both of our best friends out in front of us racing each other. We both pull our horses to a stop before we hit the dirt lot bordering all of the houses.
“Dang.” He takes his hat off, waving it in the air. “That old pony of yours has some speed.”
“Shocked the shit out of me.” We both laugh as we walk toward the barn.
“Hey.” We both look over to Ella standing on Granddad’s porch. “Don’t you think that was a bit fast, boys?”
“That was nothing. You should’ve seen Mav riding a calf back in the pasture.”
I can sense Ella’s disapproval streaming off of her and know it will be quite the adventure with her and Mav. It will be no time before I get him on the back of a bucking horse and it will be all over. Ella will fight it, but I know she’ll be proud as hell on the inside.
An idea strikes me as we approach Ella and her swollen belly. It’s sweet the way she keeps her hands around it, protecting our babies. I’ve waited for over a decade for my girl to be back in my life, and I’ll be damned if I miss another second without giving her my last name.
“Go grab Granddad, Ella. Mav and I will be right back.”
Mav turns to me, looking at me like I just lost my mind, but he follows my lead as we take the horses into the barn.
“I want to marry your mom.” I face Mav. “And I want your permission before I make it happen.”
Mav shocks me a bit when he doesn’t acknowledge my question as he begins unsaddling and brushing down his horse. I step back and give him time. My heart sinks a bit thinking I just pushed the kid too far.
“My mom has loved you forever, Maverik. She’s never dated another man.” He pauses, and if I was to guess, I would say he has tears rolling down his face. “I’d do anything to make it happen. I’d love for you to be my dad and marry my mom.”
My sigh of relief comes out louder than I expected. Mav turns around and bolts into my chest, nearly knocking me over. His cowboy hat tumbles to the ground as I squeeze him right back and kiss the top of his head.
“I’ll always be here for you and your mom. You two have made my life an honor to live.”
“Thank you for loving my mom.”
Taking a couple steps back, I sink down onto a bale of straw and have Mav sit right down next to me.
“Over the years, I’ve learned lessons the hard way, but I wouldn’t change a damn thing right now. My family is home.”
“Yes, we are.” He wipes his few tears from his eyes. “I’ve always wanted a dad.”
“You’ve got one, a grandpa, uncles, and an aunt now that will always be here for you.”
“And bucking horses?” He flashes a little grin up to me.
“It’s tradition and a legacy thing. You’ll be a champ in no time.” I ruffle his hair. “Let’s go surprise your mom.”
When we walk out of the barn, Ella and Granddad are at the end of his sidewalk chatting it up. Everything seems brighter and full of hope, even the way Ella talks and smiles. It’s a treasure to my sight to see her this way and know it will even be sweeter after I marry her.
“What’s up, boys?” Ella asks.
“Going to town,” I reply. “I’ll go grab the truck.”
Mav stands back as I jog over to my truck. I grab my cell phone and text Merek and Challis with strict orders, getting everything in line.
“Load up, Jake.” I wait for him to hop in the back and watch Mav’s dog jump in after him. I don’t miss the happiness even beaming from Jake.
“Are you going to tell us what’s going on?” Ella asks, walking up to the driver’s side of the truck. Her blonde hair blowing in the breeze with her hand shading her eyes.
“Kiss me.” I lean out the window, snag her wrist, and pull her in for a deep kiss. I take my time sweeping my tongue along the front of her teeth and nibbling on her lower lip.
I force myself to pull away before my need for her grows way out of control and I have to take her to the bedroom to relieve my desire.
“Load up, we’re going to town for breakfast.” I step from the truck and let Ella slide in. She stops before getting in.
“I love you, Maverik Slatter.” She places a light kiss on my lips and lets her hand leisurely brush along the bulge of my pants.
“Stop it,” I growl.
“What?” She shrugs.
“You know what you’re doing to me, Pinks.”
“I just wanted a few more hours in bed with you this morning.” She grabs the collar of my shirt and begins fiddling with the buttons on it. “I’ll never be able to get enough of you, Slatter.”
“Well, you have a lifetime to try.” This time I slap her ass, leaving a stinging sensation behind. “Now, get in so I can feed you and the babies.”
Her giggles fill the air as she rubs her ass cheek. Mav keeps the conversation flowing in the truck as we drive to town. He and Granddad go on about roping and horses. It’s like they’
re long lost buddies. Granddad even makes a few calls and has Mav signed up in a local roping this weekend.
“Mom, is this the place you talked about?” Mav asks as we pull up.
“Yes,” Ella responds in a dreamy voice.
“Mom says this is the best breakfast joint in the state of Texas.”
“She’s right,” Granddad says as he takes Mav’s hand for assistance to get out of the truck.
Ella morphs into a nervous wreck as we walk in and find a booth to sit at. I know it’s the stares and her worries of the town people judging her. They can judge her all day and it won’t make a damn difference in my book. The first one to open their mouth will for damn sure get my fist to shut them the hell up. I have every single intention of flaunting her ass around town and giving everything to my queen. Nobody will stop me.
Of course our favorite waitress, Beans, serves us.
“Look who is back in town.” She tries to come off with a cheery tone in her voice, but her fake and malicious vibes are too overwhelming.
“Ella is back forever, Beans, and we expect only but the best service here or I’ll be talking to Bill about your shitty attitude, and, well, basically how you are an asshole to paying customers.”
It’s a dick move knowing she’s a single mom with a house full of little ones, but maybe it will be a bold enough statement to get her attention.
“I’ll start with drinks. What can I get everyone?” This time her voice is extremely cheerful and welcoming like any server’s should be.
We all order drinks. After Beans takes off, an awkward silence falls over the table. I squeeze Ella’s hand under the table and send her a wink.
“I know I wasn’t raised to be disrespectful, but I’ll protect this family no matter what. When someone even attempts to be disrespectful to one of you, I’ll shut it down, no questions asked.”
“Damn straight,” Granddad adds.
A new server delivers our drinks and takes our order. Guess the nasty bitch couldn’t muster up enough strength to be nice. I order the world famous pancakes for Mav. Granddad and Ella order their usual. My appetite is hijacked by my nerves, but I order anyway. If I don’t order or eat, Ella will for sure know something is up with me.
Mav’s endless chatter about starting at a new school and meeting new rodeo friends eases my nerves a bit. Ella grabs my hand, placing it on her belly and little rolls and kicks bump into my palm. I nearly crumble until Ella runs her palm up and down my arm. It helps control the overwhelming emotion coursing through me.
“Mom and Dad, you think I can go to that roping this weekend?” Mav asks as the new server brings our food out to us.
“Of course. Without a doubt,” I respond quickly. “I’ll look into getting you signed up in the rodeo club and youth circuit too.”
“Thank you.” Mav beams at me as he shoves an enormous chunk of pancake in his mouth.
“Bucking horses in no time.” Ella elbows me in the ribs and I can’t help but laugh, only making that comment for her.
“You know it’s inevitable, right?” Granddad asks her.
“My nerves can only handle so much right now and seeing my son on the back of wild horse isn’t on the list.”
My phone goes off in my pocket. It’s Merek’s ringtone. “Excuse me. I need to take this, I’ll be right back.”
24
Ella
Breakfast was a pleasant surprise and definitely curbed my cravings for breakfast foods. It’s been bacon, hash browns, and pickles that I can’t get enough of. It’s the strangest combination but seems to be my favorite lately.
My heart burst a bit when Maverik paraded us proudly into the diner and then put Beans in her place. He never took his hands off of me while there, as if he was silently screaming his claim to me. I knew being a productive citizen back here would be the toughest part of coming home.
No one besides Maverik and his family will ever understand why I ran away and the unimaginable hurt I experienced. Neighbors, fellow classmates, and even teachers will be forever staring at me like I’m an evil, poisonous venom set out to destroy. It was those exact stares and whispers that scared the shit out of me before returning, but after this morning, I don’t give a shit. Maverik is my shield of armor determined to protect me forever. With a love like that, no one’s opinion matters or has the power to affect me in the slightest.
“Where are we going?” I ask as Maverik turns in the opposite direction of the ranch.
“Just going to give Mav a quick tour of the town and arena.”
I lay my head down on his shoulder as he drives and chats with Mav and Granddad in the back seat. My eyes grow heavy with my tummy quite content and the two babies not kicking. I lace my fingers with his hand resting on my thigh before I close my heavy eyelids. It all feels like a dream. Maverik, being home, Mav so blissfully happy, a healthy pregnancy…it’s like I’m afraid someone is going to pinch me—waking me from the perfect dream.
When I feel the truck come to a stop, I stir a bit, but the sun is so bright I don’t want to open my eyes.
“Lay down, babe, I’m going to walk Mav around the arena.”
I let Maverik guide me down until my head rests on his rolled up coat. It only takes me a few minutes to doze right back off. I hear some other voices but don’t let them faze me as sleep takes over.
A shooting pain in my neck finally wakes me from a deep sleep and as I open my eyes, I notice I’ve been out for nearly an hour. The time flashes back to me from the dash of Maverik’s truck. He must have left the engine running, keeping the temperature of the cab comfortable. I slowly sit up while all my joints and muscles scream at me in sheer pain. My neck cracks as I slowly rotate it in circles.
At first it’s like the rodeo grounds are a ghost town, and if I didn’t know any better, I’d think I was the only one here. As I slide out of the truck and my feet hit the ground, my bladder surges. I spot Merek’s truck closer to the bucking chutes and then hear several voices chatting it up. I wouldn’t be surprised if Maverik didn’t have his brother bring Arsine down so Mav could ride him in the arena.
I’m not sure I’m going to be able to handle the amount of rodeo and levels of testosterone that I just put myself in. I can only pray for two little sweet princesses. I dart to the bathroom before I go join the group in the arena.
When I get closer to the entryway of the arena, I hear more and more voices and wonder what in the hell is going on. Laughter and light music fills the air, and when I swing the entry gate open, I nearly pass out from shock. I must still be dreaming or stuck in some dimension of the universe.
A makeshift dance floor, tables, chairs, and flowers fill the arena. It’s an odd picture for sure. A DJ is set up in the corner with his large speakers on either side of him. I spot Maverik with a longneck in his hand and a smile which covers his entire face. He’s chatting with Marvel, Weston, and Merek.
Mav spots me and tosses down his rope before he runs the length of the arena over to me.
“Mom,” he shouts as he sprints toward me. His voice seems to catch the attention of the crowd. I feel the heat of embarrassment attack my cheeks as everyone stares at me. Frantically, I stare down Maverik, wanting him to come save me from whatever in the hell is going down. He only shrugs and smiles even bigger back at me.
“Mom.” Mav is out of breath and bent over trying to catch it.
“What in the hell is going on, Mav?” I don’t break eye contact with Maverik across the arena.
“Language, Mom.” Mav stands up facing me. “We’re getting married today.”
My knees buckle and I may have pissed myself a wee bit. “We are what?”
“Surprise wedding day,” Mav shouts.
“Shhhh.” I grab Mav’s shoulder. “Who in the hell does a surprise wedding day?”
I scan the crowd again looking for Maverik and recognize several familiar old friends and all of his family. My heart thuds even louder in my chest.
“Maverik’s marrying us toda
y. This is all yours, Mom. You get him forever.”
Mav’s words settle my nerves and nearly bring me to tears. Passion, love, and desire mingle together and not even one word on the face of this Earth can express the love and happiness coursing through me, even if I’m bright red from embarrassment.
A Heart Like Mine by Miranda Lambert starts playing as the crowd parts, leaving an aisle for me to walk down.
Mav taps my belly, grabbing my attention as he holds up his arm for me to take.
“Dad said you’d know what to do when this song starts playing. Said it was your song.”
Tears like no other type of tears I’ve ever cried begin to pour down my face as I lace my arm in Mav’s and begin walking toward Maverik. The closer we get to him the clearer everything becomes. He’s standing next to Judge Connor with his brothers standing behind him. Challis and my best friend, Sammy from high school, stand on the other side with hot pink bouquets.
“How?” I whisper.
“He loves you, Momma.”
I freeze and turn to Mav, grip his face in my hands and talk through my tears. “Are you okay with this? Are you truly happy? Mav, you’re my world and I have to know you’re okay with this.”
I feel his little palm cover the back of my hand on his face. He’s my world and everything I’ve fought for and the true gift from God that kept me fighting for so many years.
“Mom, Mav…I mean Dad, asked me if he could marry you and I knew he was going to do this. I want a dad and a home with you and the babies. You’ve always given me everything I’ve ever wanted and now I just want a dad.”
The day I gave birth to Mav was the scariest day of my life. I entered the automatic doors of the hospital in tortuous pain and fear. Labor lasted over twenty-four hours, then a little black-haired boy came out in the world screaming and crying. The sound of his cry erased the pain of the rape, his innocent eyes staring up into mine gave me reason to survive, but it was his beautiful spirit that filled my world that gave me the best present ever.
