by J. C. Diem
“That was regrettable and I wish I could change what happened,” she said and lowered her eyes in what appeared to be shame. “I’d like to explain everything to you, but I guess there’s no point if you’re not going to stay.”
He turned to walk away, but she wasn’t done yet. “Before you leave, there’s someone I’d like you to meet,” Nina said casually. “Gloria? Would you please step forward?”
A girl who had been standing at the back of the pack stepped forward. Reece turned to face her and I heard his breath catch. For a moment, his mind was wide open to me from sheer shock. I saw a flash of his memory of when he’d been stuck in his fantasy world. Gloria was the petite blond that he’d been mated to.
“Gloria was promised to you when you were both babies,” Nina explained. “She comes from a pure blood family. Her lineage is as proud and ancient as ours.”
“It’s a pleasure to meet you, Garrett,” she said shyly.
I felt his heart stutter then pick up speed. His mind became confused then the door slammed shut between us. In the brief moment before I lost contact with him, I sensed that he wasn’t alone in his head. The presence was back and it was stronger than ever.
“You should know,” Nina said to her first born son, “that bonding with a true born lycan will replace the bond you have with the lesser wolf.” Her eyes flicked to me in distaste. “It will be a painful process, but I believe it will heal the taint that you’re infected with.”
She clearly blamed me for his condition. I wondered if she knew that it was our bond that had saved him from dying after my mother had bitten him. I doubted she did or that she’d even care if she knew. I was inferior and she would never accept me as her son’s mate.
Reece turned to me and I saw regret in his eyes. He walked over and took my hand. Numb and knowing what was coming, I allowed him to draw me far enough away that we wouldn’t be overheard when he crushed my hopes.
Meeting my gaze squarely, he held my hand tightly. “You know I care about you,” he began and my heart went still. “I will always care about you.” His gaze strayed to Gloria. “But she is my true mate. I can feel it in here.” He touched his hand to his temple, which I found strange. The love I felt for him was centered in my heart rather than in my head. “If you care about me at all,” he said quietly, “you’ll want me to be happy.”
“What about my happiness?” I said plaintively. “Doesn’t that matter to you at all?” He looked away without answering. “Of course it doesn’t,” I said bitterly. “I’m just a lowly cur. I’ll never be good enough to pure bloods like you and your family.”
“Once you’ve been freed from our bond, you’ll be able to find someone else,” he said lamely. His gaze strayed back to Gloria and locked onto her face.
I wanted to scream at him, to draw my gun and shoot his mother, brother and uncle in the face. Most of all, I wanted to leap on Gloria and claw her eyes out. With one look from her doe brown eyes, she’d stolen the man I loved away from me.
Instead of descending into a killing spree, I pulled my hand free, turned my back and walked away. Mark called my name and I broke into a run. I couldn’t face anyone right now. My heart was breaking and I needed to mourn in private.
Darkness fell before Zeus finally found me. I’d run for hours until exhaustion finally forced me to stop. Circling around our compound, I’d ended up in the woods nearby. I felt the Rottweiler coming and I didn’t respond when his wet nose nudged my hand. I was sitting on the ground with my back to a tree and my face buried in my knees. He whined and nudged me again. Hearing footsteps approaching, I forced myself to sit up straight.
“Can I come closer?” Kala asked.
“Sure,” I said and my voice sounded as dead as I felt.
“Are you okay?” She sank into a crouch beside me and studied my face. “Scratch that question. Of course you’re not okay.”
“He left me,” I said in a small voice, as if she was somehow unaware of that fact.
“He left all of us,” she scowled. “He chose a blond bimbo over the coolest, most badass girl I’ve ever met.” I looked at her blankly. “I’m talking about you, moron.”
“Oh.” I didn’t think I was particularly badass, but it was a nice compliment. “What am I going to do?”
“You’re going to come back to the base with me and we’ll all figure this out together.”
Numb inside, I allowed her to draw me to my feet. She led me to the SUV and we climbed in. Zeus sat in the back and didn’t take his eyes off me for a second. He sensed how fragile I was feeling and how easy it would be for me to fall apart.
Mark and Flynn exchanged relieved looks when we stepped through the door and entered the living room. It was dinner time and they’d been busy cooking. “I thought we should head back to our base in Colorado in the morning,” Mark said casually as I took a seat at the dining table. “We can take a short break before we head to New Orleans.” He placed a plate of food in front of me. I didn’t even care what I was eating. It tasted like ashes as I chewed and swallowed.
“That sounds good,” Kala said brightly when I failed to respond.
“We could all use a holiday,” Flynn agreed.
I nodded uncaringly, unable to muster a response. Nothing seemed to matter to me now. After my meal, I trudged upstairs with Zeus at my heels. He followed me into my bedroom and sat outside the bathroom door as I took a shower.
Drying my hair, I looked into my reflection and flinched at what I saw. My eyes were dark pools that were devoid of emotion. I hadn’t cried yet and I wasn’t sure I was even capable of it. I’d buried my feelings deep inside because it was easier than trying to deal with them.
After a sleepless night, I was still numb when I packed my belongings in the morning. I forced down some cereal and followed the others to the garage when it was time to leave. I closed my eyes and pretended to sleep as we headed to the closest airport.
Hours later, we reached our base in Colorado. I couldn’t remember much of our journey back to the place that felt most like home. Standing in the bedroom where Reece had both taken my virginity and had changed my life forever by turning me into a werewolf, my emotions finally broke free.
He’d promised me that we were family now and that he’d never leave me. That promise had been fleeting and I realized now that it had never been true at all. As soon as he’d met an attractive pure born female, he’d cast me aside like garbage.
The rage that I’d tried so hard to master began to build. This time, Reece wasn’t here to stop it from spilling over. This time, he was the cause of it. Racing downstairs, I ignored Mark’s shout of alarm as I opened the door that led to the front of the compound.
Pain washed through me as the control that I’d fought so hard for broke. My wolf flexed inside me. She was far weaker than normal, but she still wanted out and I couldn’t deny her. Screaming from the agony that was far stronger than usual, my body began to change as she ascended. I saw Mark, Kala and Flynn emerge from the building. They clutched each other in fear when I went through my transformation. The last thing I saw before I became a werewolf was Zeus staring at me forlornly.
It had been torturous to change when the moon wasn’t full, but the pain eventually began to subside. One of the humans approached me warily. He said something to me and I growled in warning. The other two moved to stand in front of him protectively, but I wasn’t interested in eating any of them or their pet dog. The only thing I wanted to do was to leave this place.
They followed me as I trotted down a dirt road to a gate. I sensed that it would be death to approach the barrier. Trapped and needing to escape, I tilted my head back and howled. My heart was full of sorrow when there was no answering call from my mate.
One of the humans took something out of his pocket and the gate swung open a few seconds later. The Rottweiler tried to follow me and I growled to warn him away. I didn’t want or need a companion even though I felt a strange, tenuous link to him.
My mate
had left me and I was now an outcast. For our kind, there was no worse state of being. We weren’t meant to be alone, but that was my fate now. I didn’t understand how this had come to be. I only knew that he had chosen another and that he would soon sever his bond with me.
Bereft, I left the place that felt like home without a backward look. There was only pain for me here. I trotted towards the nearby mountain range with no real destination in mind.
I knew it was unnatural for me to be in this form at this time in the moon’s cycle, but I didn’t care. Shunned and abandoned by the one I loved the most, I had become something that none of our kind would wish on our worst enemies. I was now a lone wolf who was doomed to live in perpetual solitude.
Titles by J.C. Diem:
(Mortis Series)
Death Beckons
Death Embraces
Death Deceives
Death Devours
Death Betrays
Death Banishes
Death Returns
Death Conquers
Death Reigns
(Shifter Squad Series)
Seven Psychics
Zombie King
Dark Coven
Rogue Wolf
Corpse Thieves
Snake Charmer, book six of the Shifter Squad Series is due to be released in September.
If you would like to be advised of any new releases, please visit my website: www.jcdiem.com and sign up to receive my newsletter.
