Her silent sigh went unheard, but it brushed over my neck when her face pushed close.
“I lied earlier,” I said. “When I said no one asked about us. Someone did.”
“Who?”
“My father.”
“I’ve always gotten the impression you don’t have much of a relationship with him.”
“I don’t.” My voice was clipped, and it was work to unhinge my suddenly tense jaw to explain further. “He never liked my interest in cars or that I street raced. It didn’t fit in his business world.”
“I’m sure that went over well,” she said knowingly.
I smiled to myself. “Pretty much. I did what I wanted anyway. We settled into a tolerable relationship, and he bailed me out of trouble a few times.”
“Like criminal trouble?”
“Yeah,” I said. “I’ve done some shit I probably should have done jail time for.”
“What kind of shit?” she asked, looking up.
“Illegal betting, fighting…”
“I don’t think you can go to jail for fighting.” She pointed out.
“When you almost kill some people, you can.”
I watched her eyes widen. I measured her reaction to my words. I’d never told anyone that before, that I’d beat someone almost to death. It was a sworn secret between my father and me and only those involved. Everyone was paid to shut the hell up about it. I wasn’t even sure how much Arrow knew.
“Did they deserve it?” she asked softly, still staring unflinchingly in my eyes.
“Oh yeah.”
She nodded once. “Okay.” Then she tucked her head back into my neck.
I wasn’t shocked very often, but I was just then. My body went slack, all my energy going to process her reaction. Even the arm holding her fell away.
Such easy acceptance.
No fear.
Not even when I outright admitted to being violent. Granted, it was provoked.
“Jace,” she whispered.
Both my arms tucked around her. My head turned enough so I could rest my chin on her head as I gazed out over the empty track. Down below, my car was a bright spot, the white paint standing out in the night like a neon sign.
“A couple years ago, my dad did some things, said some shit that ruined our tolerable relationship.”
“Did it have to do with Arrow?”
I paused. “You know he’s gay?”
“Is it a secret?”
“Not really,” I murmured. But it wasn’t something we announced.
“Hopper asked about him, you know,” she mused, interest in her tone.
My attention zeroed in. “What the hell for?”
“Maybe he’s interested.”
Uh, what? “Hopper is gay?”
“Yeah,” she answered.
“He’s too old,” I announced. He could forget it right now, and he could also never look at my brother again.
Josie burst out laughing. “Old!”
I made a sound.
“He’s twenty-six.”
“Arrow is twenty,” I replied, tight.
“Age is just a number…” she mused.
“No,” I barked.
She just giggled. “Testy.”
“My brother’s been through a lot of shit.” My voice was hard. “My father only made it worse. He’s damaged now. I won’t stand around and watch him get hurt again.”
“Ahhh,” she said, knowingly.
Her tone annoyed me. “What?”
“The people you almost killed… Did that have to do with your brother?”
“Yeah,” I said, not wanting to say anymore. It’s not really something I liked to think about. In fact, some nights it haunted me in my dreams.
I might have almost killed some guys, but I was no killer. That experience would be something I would never forget.
“Sometimes I wonder if my father had let me go to jail, if I would feel—” My lips slammed shut. I hadn’t realized I was speaking out loud.
“Less guilty?” she asked, soft.
I nodded.
“Look, I don’t know what happened. I could probably guess, but I won’t.”
“You wouldn’t be right. Someone as light as you could never imagine something so fucked up.”
She paused, sat up, and looked me in the eye. It wasn’t hard because when she sat straight, our eyes were level.
“I’m not so light.”
Oh, Josie. What the fuck have they done to you? I brushed my hand over her hair. “To me you are.”
“We walk around a lot of stuff, don’t we?” she asked, her mouth turned up slightly.
“Sometimes you don’t have to come right out and say everything to understand,” I murmured.
“Your father asked about us?” she asked.
I nodded. “He summoned me to his towering offices, and there was our magazine on his desk,” I explained. “I didn’t even know it was out.”
“I don’t know how they got it out so quickly,” she mused. “I looked up in Target one day, and there it was.”
“Did you buy it?” I teased.
She blushed.
It made something inside me feel warm.
“He thought we were dating,” I said of my father.
“I think everyone assumes that.”
I shrugged. It didn’t bother me. In fact, I was glad. Having someone like Josie at my side could never be considered anything but a blessing.
“I think it was the first time he was happy with one of my decisions,” I mused.
She laughed. “Then you told him we weren’t together.”
“I told him I was working on it.”
She pulled back, surprise written on her features.
I winked.
“He told me he was proud of me,” I admitted quietly. The words felt like a heavy weight. “I don’t remember him ever saying that to me before.”
Her hand came to rest on my jaw, lightly rubbing over my stubble.
“It made me suspicious, you know?”
She nodded. “Like he wants something.”
I nodded. That was exactly it. “He says he wants to make amends and he’s sorry for being a shitty father. He claims he checked out when my mom died…”
“Your mom died?”
“When I was six.”
She snuggled back into my chest. This time her arm came up to loop around my neck. It was sort of odd to be comforted. No one had ever comforted me before.
It was kinda nice.
So I picked up her hand, kissed the palm, then laid it back around my neck.
“Arrow’s mom raised me really. She’s a good woman; she was good to me. But it was never the same.”
“Can you forgive him?” she asked, cutting right to the heart of things.
I’d asked myself that a hundred times since I saw him.
“For being a shit father to me? Yeah, I guess. But what he did to Arrow… that I can never forgive.”
Her arm tightened around me. “Maybe someday you’ll tell me about it.”
“Someday, I will.” I promised. But not right now. Right now I felt like I’d laid out so much I had to keep something in reserve.
Just like maybe someday she’d tell me what kind of hazing she’d gone through.
“What does Arrow say?” she asked.
“I, uh, haven’t talked to him about it. I’ve been avoiding it.”
“You protect him,” she said simply.
“He fights against it. He wants to stand on his own.”
“He’s strong.”
I agreed. “Way stronger than he looks.”
“You love him,” she whispered.
I whispered back, “Yeah, I do.”
“You’re a good man, Jace.”
“Sometimes.”
“All the time.”
“Don’t be telling people that. I got a rep to protect.”
She kissed the side of my neck. The giggle that escaped her caressed my skin. I patted the side o
f her ass. “Up,” I commanded.
Josie unfolded from my lap, and the jacket slid off her toward the ground. I caught it and stood, wrapping it around her shoulders and tucking it close.
“Let’s go.” I took her hand and led her down the stands so we could jump back over the wall. “You wanna drive back to the hotel?” I asked.
She smiled. “Not this time.”
Slightly perplexed, I grabbed the hard top and installed it back on the Lotus. It was late now, and the air was much colder than when we arrived.
“Thanks for bringing me here,” Josie said when I was shut in the driver’s side.
I hit the start button and turned to face her. “You want some food?”
Her mouth twisted. “I’m actually kinda starving.”
“You like tacos?”
“Are there people who don’t?”
“Fuck if I know.” I shrugged. “I’ll hit a drive-thru on the way to the hotel.”
“How long until we get there?” she asked, her voice dipping.
“Baby, I can be there in five if you’re that starving,” I drawled and put the car in first gear.
“Maybe take the longer route.” Her hand reached across the center and brushed across the front of my jeans.
For the first time in my entire life, the car stalled out on me.
“Josie,”
Her fingers found the button and popped it open. Slowly, my zipper came down. My hips slid out farther so she had better access.
“You’re supposed to be driving, Jace,” she said, turning in the seat so she could lean across. My dick slid out with the help of her hand; the waistband of my boxers were pulled down with the other.
Her hand slid up my shaft. It was growing harder by the second.
The engine fired right back up, and I eased the car forward. “Maybe I’ll just take a lap before pulling out on the main road,” I rasped, feeling her hand squeezing gently around my head.
“Whatever you say, Jace,” she purred.
I loved it when she said my name.
Her mouth slid down over my dick, and I moaned. Beneath my hands, the wheel jerked. God, her mouth was everything. Hot, tight, wet. Her lips wrapped around my shaft with the perfect amount of pressure and worked, slipping up and down.
All at once, she sank even farther, taking all of me. The tip of my head hit the back of her throat, and she moaned. My foot tamped down on the gas with excitement as her mouth released me.
My hand gripped the wheel; my other buried in the back of her head and pushed down so she could take me deep once again. My tires raced over the track while she sucked my dick until I was panting in need.
I was throbbing, desperate for release. I hadn’t had sex since the night in the hangar, but I craved her every day. Josie wrapped her lips around the tip of my head and sucked deep. I felt myself jerk inside her, and I groaned. The car swerved, but it didn’t matter because there was no one else on the track.
Regretfully, the sudden movement made her release me and look up. “Time to turn around,” she said.
I focused ahead, and the gravel section was coming into view.
I grabbed the emergency brake, pulled it, and then drifted around in a wide circle. She laughed, and I pushed her head back down to my center.
Her tongue teased me, licking up the sides, flirting with the head, until finally she plunged back over it.
“Don’t stop, Josie.” I urged.
She didn’t. She sucked me until I almost hurt. Until I slammed on the brakes and brought us to a full-on stop. The second the Lotus was no longer in motion, she took me deep one final time and sucked.
I bucked up in the seat, but she stayed with me, sucking me dry as I shot off a load across her perfect tongue.
I moaned and shouted as I came, white lights bursting behind my eyes until I fell back into the seat, spent.
Josie was still sucking, still lapping up every last bit of me. Before pulling away completely, she gave my cock one last thorough swipe with her tongue, and I shuddered.
I glanced at her face through half-closed eyes when she pulled back, licking her lips.
“Blow and drive,” I muttered. “Sex and cars. You just combined my two favorite things.”
“I still want tacos,” she said. “And I want all night like you promised.”
I chuckled and buttoned up my pants.
A fast car, a blow job, and now sex and tacos?
Best night ever.
Joey
We didn’t turn on one light when we walked into my hotel room. It wasn’t because I didn’t want to see him. On the contrary, I could look at Jace all day and still want to look more.
We didn’t speak either. Not one word when we pulled into the hotel parking lot, walked through the lobby, rode up the elevator, and walked down the silent and empty hall. It wasn’t because it was awkward or because we had nothing to say. After sitting in the stands in his lap tonight and listening to him and him listening to me I knew conversation would never be a problem.
Have you ever wanted someone so much you couldn’t see?
Have you ever felt need so deep the words wouldn’t come?
Light and words weren’t needed right now. We were past that.
My shoes were the first to go. Jace dropped the bag filled with tacos on the dresser and turned. I didn’t even wonder if he would be ready so soon after the car. I saw it in his eyes. I felt it in the air.
The hum of the AC unit by the window was the only sound in the room besides the thundering of my heart.
Jace used nimble fingers to peel his jacket off my shoulders. I abandoned it to the bed. The rest of my clothes came off slowly, excruciatingly slow. Each garment fell to the dark floor without another thought, and the closer I got to being bare, the more anticipation I felt.
My knees rattled beneath my skin. A fine tremor made my fingers clumsy when I reached for his shirt. He must have sensed how far gone I was because he brushed my hands away softly and disrobed right before my heated stare.
Between my legs was soaked. Tingles of pain shot up into my lower belly, and my breasts ached for his hands. Jace’s bare skin was like a beacon in the dark. Every line of his body stood out; the strength he emanated seemed to make me feel even weaker.
Powerless wasn’t a feeling I reveled in, but oh, I reveled in it right now.
Stepping up to him, my palms flattened on his smooth chest and dragged over his shoulders, down his biceps. His hands spasmed around mine, but I kept moving, keeping my touch elusive, letting him feel it, but not lingering any one place long enough for him to be fully satisfied.
I wanted Jace to know how I felt. I longed to make him hurt with need. If I was going to love him, then I would do it better than anyone else ever could.
And yes, I was going to love Jace.
I was already falling, spiraling deep.
He stood beneath my exploration, his body taut. He didn’t move but for the rapid rise and fall of his chest.
On impulse, I leaned forward, placing my ear just over his heart. The sound of it beating was so satisfying because of the quickened pace. I closed my eyes briefly, taking in the rhythm, committing it to memory.
Jace’s bare arms wrapped around me, and the tips of his fingers found the nape of my neck.
I wasn’t yet ready to pull away from him, from the sound beneath my ear, so I dragged my nails gently down his back, enjoying the way his waist dipped in slightly above his ass. Lightly, I drifted farther down, over his cheeks, and flirted with his crack to finally reach the back of his thighs.
Between us, his rod poked me, a constant reminder of all the pleasure yet to come. Slowly, I pulled back, closing my lips around his nipple. Jace sucked in a breath as I sucked and played with the erect bud, nipping at it with my teeth.
After I repeated the process with the other, I trailed hot kisses down his toned abdominals, past his belly button, and to the smooth skin above his dick.
The second my tongue swiped over i
t, his hands went beneath my armpits and lifted me. He moved around the side of the king-size, and with one great yank, the blankets gave way. Crooking a finger at me, I went to his side and was pressed down into the center of the blankets.
My arm fell out to the side, my fingers reaching for him. Lips unlike any lips I’d ever known lightly caressed those fingertips, moving down over my hand, my wrist, and up my arm. The farther up he kissed, the closer he came, until he was on the bed completely and climbed between my legs.
Jace wrapped his arms beneath me. I arched up to get closer the same time he moved over me, bringing us chest to chest.
His weight pressed me into the bed, and I expelled a satisfied sigh. I liked being skin to skin with him like this, every part of him touching every part of me.
Still wrapped up in his arms, he began to kiss me. First my cheeks, my eyelids, and then the tip of my nose. Emotion swelled up inside me, so much it made me overwhelmed, and I began to wiggle like I wanted to get away.
A little bit of panic intruded on our moment, and I was angry at it, but the feeling was too strong to ignore.
“Josie.” My name sounded almost like a command.
Our eyes met.
“It’s okay,” he told me in a much gentler tone.
I started to shake my head, mortified because this wasn’t me. Emotion like this never brought me down, but oh, I was drowning.
I was drowning in Jace.
“It’s all right, baby.” He assured me.
I wasn’t prepared for this. I was prepared for sex, for satisfaction, for mind-bending pleasure. Not for emotion. Not for something deeper than just two people merging their bodies.
This felt like he was trying merge into my soul.
It was scary.
It felt a lot like love.
“Jace, I—”
“I know,” he murmured, pushing up on his elbows to look down. His eyes reflected back to me everything I felt.
Before I could say anything else, our lips met. His tongue swept inside my mouth. It felt like he belonged. It felt like home. All the anxiety I felt was soothed away.
Just like that, my body went boneless beneath him.
He felt the give inside me, and he moaned.
We stayed like that for a while, making out, having sex with just our mouths. Eventually, it wasn’t enough. His mouth began to explore. Down my neck and over my collarbone he sucked.
#Swag (GearShark #3) Page 22
