I told my father. I spilled it all out. Even about the night I was harassed while naked and my brake line was cut.
He listened without a word. He moved to the window as I spoke and stared at the curtain marring the view of the night. I wondered if he even noticed he only stared at fabric, that the view was closed off. It seemed to me he was lost in the pictures my words conjured up… lost in vivid images the details conjured.
I tried to speak matter-of-factly. To just lay out the bare bones of the naked truth… but emotion clogged my throat as I, too, relived not only what happened tonight at the hands of Cannon, but during all the nights past.
When I was done talking, I fell silent and moved to get a fresh water to try and soothe my raw throat.
“Have you been to the doctor?” he asked, still staring at the mundane hotel curtain.
“I don’t need a doctor.”
“There could be damage to your vocal chords.” His voice was strained, as if he, too, had been choked.
“I’m fine.”
“You’re not!” he yelled.
The sudden, powerful outburst made me jump. My father was a powerful man, but he never yelled. He never had to. He always got exactly what he wanted without ever raising his voice.
Yet he was yelling now.
Some of the water from the bottle spilled over the top and trickled down my hand. I wiped it away and looked up. He was facing me now, watching me with sharp, angry eyes.
His voice quieted as he took in all my injuries once more. “Cannon did all this to you?”
I nodded.
“He’ll never race again.” My father didn’t make empty statements. Four words and Dean Cannon’s fate was permanently sealed.
“He paid someone on the pit crew today to alter my car. That win today should have been mine. He took it from me.”
“This is the real reason you wanted to cross over so badly,” he stated.
I nodded.
My father’s eyes went flat. “You should have come to me.”
“And say what?” I burst out. “Oh, Dad, the guys at the club are being so mean to me. They don’t like girls. They don’t want me around.” I mocked. “What would you have done?” I pressed, jumping back to my feet. “You would have thought I was being weak just like everyone else.”
He lifted his chin to stare at me, sliding both hands in the pockets of his trousers. I saw the challenge in the set of his jaw, the stubbornness settling on his shoulders.
“I’m Joey for a reason, dad.” I began, feeling some defiance in me crumble. Maybe his defiance was stronger than mine.
Maybe I just didn’t have any left tonight.
“You never wanted a girl. I was a disappointment to you from the day I was born. I tried so hard to be what you wanted. I will never be a man, but I thought maybe if I grew into a strong enough woman, you might respect me just as much.”
His chin dropped some as I spoke, but now that I was talking, I wasn’t about to stop.
“Me trying to be what you wanted made me everything Mom didn’t want. She was too weak for you, and she never did give you that son. She wasn’t interested in me when she moved to Paris. She never asked me to go with her, did you know that? Not once. It was like it never even occurred to her to take her only child.”
“Your mother is a selfish woman,” he said, some regret in his voice.
“But I always had a place with you. You made that clear, even when she didn’t. It was like no matter how disappointed you might be in me, you still made room in your life. Even as a teenager, even when I was determined to push you away.”
“I have never been disappointed in you.”
“Except for the fact I’m the wrong gender.”
He measured me, pulled his hands free of the pockets, and stepped closer. “I wanted a boy. I’ve never hidden it. I was hoping for more than one child, but that wasn’t in the cards for me. Neither was a son. That doesn’t mean I’m disappointed in what I do have. I regret you feel you’ve never measured up in my eyes. I regret I never told you different.”
“You don’t lie,” I said, as if that explained exactly why he never told me any of those things.
“Then you will believe me when I say I am proud of you. More proud than I think you will ever realize. It was a fool thing to openly admit to wanting a son so much, because the truth is you are not and could never be a disappointment to me. In fact, looking at you right now, I am more convinced than ever not even a son could measure up to the person you are.”
I swayed a little on my feet. His words were like piercing arrows that hit their mark in the deepest part of me, the most tender flesh.
“I wanted an heir, and that’s exactly what I got. You’re my daughter, and I love you.”
Well, fuck.
I was going to cry. And not the sniffle, sniffle kind of cry either. The kind of ugly cry people needed to look away from. The kind that left your face swollen for a full day after you were dry.
I expected a lecture, a stern talking to, and yes, concern… but I didn’t expect to hear he loved me. That he was proud of me.
I sniffled, sat on the end of the bed, and looked down, trying to gain some composure.
How long had I wanted to hear what he just said? How deep did my feelings of not being good enough go?
Deep.
So deep I was pretty sure they were the roots from which the rest of my character grew from.
I never realized how wholly those words would heal something inside me.
“Maybe if I’d told you this sooner, things wouldn’t have gone as far as they have. Maybe you wouldn’t be sitting there battered.”
“This isn’t your fault, Dad,” I said as he came to sit beside me on the bed. Despite his weary appearance, he still smelled like fresh aftershave, the kind he’d worn as long as I could remember. Old Spice.
“Not entirely. Cannon and a few other members of the club are going to have a rude awakening in the next few days. This behavior stops here and now.”
“What are you going to do?” I asked. Looking up, my stomach clenched from the steel I heard in his words.
“Do what I should have done a long time ago. Clean house.”
“What does that say about me, then?” I asked. “That I had to have my father step in and fight my battles.”
“This isn’t just your battle, Joey. It’s mine, too. We’re a family, and we fight together. I shouldn’t have let you believe coming to me was somehow a black mark against your character. You endured abuse too long, and it stops right now.”
A tear slipped over my cheek, followed by another and another. My father put his arm around me, and I leaned into his side. I felt his lips on the top of my head, and it caused tenderness to awaken within me.
A girl would always have a soft spot for her daddy… no matter how old she was.
“I love you, Dad,” I whispered.
“I love you, my daughter,” he echoed. “Now…” His voice was brisk as he tightened his arm around me. “No more of this silence bullshit. You don’t ever have to prove to me how strong you are. I know. I see it on a daily basis. If someone is harassing you or just treating my daughter poorly, then I want to hear about it.”
I laughed. It was a watery sound. “Yes, sir.”
“Good. Now get your things. We’re going home. My personal doctor is waiting to look you over. And we’ll be meeting with my lawyers as well.”
“Lawyers!” I gasped, wincing because it hurt my throat.
“Oh, that criminal Cannon is going away for a long time. And you don’t really think I’m going to let that disqualification stick, do you?”
“I still want to cross over,” I stated, pulling back to look at him.
“I figured. You have my complete blessing, but Joey Gamble doesn’t drive out of the pro division with a disqualification under her tires.”
Dad always seemed to make everything seem a little less terrible, you know? Jace was my rock, my security… but not even
he was as strong of a force as my father.
I leaned my head back on his shoulder. He nudged me. “Come on, then.”
“I’m not ready to leave yet. I’d rather wait until morning.”
“You need to see a doctor.”
I sat back. “I will tomorrow.”
My father’s shrewd gaze landed on Jace’s duffle bag. “This have to do with the owner of that bag?”
I nodded.
“The staff at the house says he was with you the night before you flew here.”
Of course they did. The staff was a bunch of big tattlers. “I’m an adult.” I reminded him.
“You’ll always be my little girl.”
I melted a little at his response.
“So you and Lorhaven… I guess that explains why he bloodied up Cannon so good.”
“I caused some of that damage, too,” I protested, indignant.
He chuckled. “Of that I have no doubt.” He stood from the bed. “All right, I’ll have the doctor at the house tomorrow, late morning.”
“At the house?” I wondered.
He nodded. “Less press that way.”
I agreed and walked with him toward the door.
“So when am I going to get to meet this Lorhaven?”
“Soon.” I promised.
“Looking forward to it. I’m sure he must be something to have caught my daughter’s eye.”
I smiled. “He’s something.” I agreed.
Before opening the door, he glanced at me. “There’s something else I need to ask you about, Joey.”
I nodded.
“Did Hopper know about this? Did he sit idly by why you were hazed?”
I was shaking my head before he was even done asking. “They never did it when Hopper was around. I honestly don’t think he knew how bad it was.”
“But he knew something was happening…” he surmised, a displeased note in his voice.
“He saw the pictures they, uh, taped up in the garage. He came down on them. Hard. They stopped for a while. I think Hopper just assumed they never started again.”
“I see,” he murmured. What it is he saw I wasn’t quite sure.
“Please don’t take it out on Hopper, Dad. You know he has his own personal demons to battle. Battling mine isn’t his responsibility.”
“It is as a manager,” he replied, tight.
“If I had spoken up, Jay would have come to you,” I said, absolute surety in my words. Jay Hopper was a lot of things. A tortured soul. A recluse. A private man. My friend.
He was not an abuse enabler.
I could never believe he would stand by and allow men to abuse me.
“You let me worry about Hopper,” he said, leaning in to kiss my forehead.
I wasn’t sure what that meant, and it made my stomach clench.
He must have read it on my face, because when he pulled back, he sighed heavily. “You know I have a fondness for Hopper. Don’t worry.”
I nodded, tears coming back into my eyes. My father frowned, and I tried with all the will in me to snuff out my emotional display.
“You’re sure you won’t come with me now?”
I shook my head. “No, Jace is right next door. He’s coming back.”
“Drew and Trent are just down the hall,” he said, as if that made him feel better.
“I know.” I smiled.
“I love you, Josephine.”
“I love you, too, Dad.”
When he was out in the hall, I called out to him. He turned. “Thanks for coming.”
“You’re my daughter. And a damn good one at that.”
I watched him until the elevator closed and he was completely gone. A shuddering breath left my chest. I was still stiff and sore from everything that happened tonight, but I felt lighter. Less bleak.
My father was proud of me. Of the woman I was.
I had Jace, free and clear, no secrets or pride between us.
Today had been a shitty, shitty day…
But maybe not as shitty as I originally thought.
Lorhaven
I’d never been a nervous guy.
I wasn’t about to start that shit now.
It didn’t matter that Ron Gamble was a powerful man. He wasn’t the first the one I’d ever dealt with. It didn’t matter I was standing in the center of his office, which looked more like a study off the set of a movie. I’d been in offices with equal prestige.
He was my girlfriend’s father.
Correction, my one-and-only’s father.
I’d never had a talk with the girlfriend’s father before.
Correction, yes, I had.
When I was sixteen and horny as hell. Those conversations went in one ear and out the other. I didn’t listen to that shit.
This was different. Josie was different, and Gamble was her father. I wanted his respect.
Okay. Fine. I was nervous.
Fuck if I’d show it, though.
Josie wasn’t even here. She was at the track with Drew and Trent, likely having the time of her life speeding around in my damn Lotus.
Maybe that’s why my guts were churning. I gave the woman the keys to my car.
It was going to get me some serious bedroom action later, though. *wags eyebrows*
The sound of a throat clearing had me spinning around. Gamble stood near his desk, looking at me, his eyebrow raised.
“Did you say something?” I asked.
“You got a hearing problem?” he asked, gruff.
“I gave Josie the keys to my Lotus,” I deadpanned.
Gamble threw back his head and laughed. “Have some scotch, son. You’re gonna need it.” He went over to the bar where glasses sat along with a dark bottle of liquid and poured two glasses. I accepted it when he handed it over.
“You call my daughter Josie,” he said, staring at me over the rim of the glass. He had quite the stare on him. I’d like to see him and my father in the same room. This guy was probably a match for him.
Well, his reputation preceded him, but I’d never met him until now. Even after a couple months of dating Josie and being with her every chance we got.
“Unlike you, I’m pretty happy she’s a girl,” I quipped.
His eyes narrowed. I took a sip of the scotch and appreciated the way it burned my throat. I might not be my father, but I definitely had some of his, uh, gumption.
“I’ve never made a secret I wanted a son. But I love my daughter very much. She’s the only child I have.”
“I know that. She loves you,” I told him.
“Then you must know I’ll do anything for her.”
I lowered the glass from my mouth. “This the part where you try and run me off?”
“I had someone look into your background.”
“Ah, found out all about the skeletons in my closet, did ya? Should have asked. I would have given you the information personally.”
“I actually believe that,” he mused.
“I’m not a liar,” I said.
“Illegal betting, gambling, and attempted murder are nothing to be proud of.”
“I’m not proud of it.”
“I’ve met your father. We actually do some business together,” Gamble said, dismissing my criminal past. For now, anyway.
“I don’t like him,” I said, taking another sip of the scotch. It was some good shit.
“Me either.”
I smiled.
Gamble scrutinized me from behind a shrewd stare. I bet he read people better than most people read books. “You’re nothing like him, though, are you?”
“No. And I never will be.” I confirmed.
“You beat up Dean Cannon, outed him to the press.”
“He hit your daughter in the face,” I growled. “He deserved worse than that.”
He pushed away from the bar, carried his glass over behind his desk, and set it down on a stack of papers. He was still dressed for work even though he was at home and it was after hours. His suit was clearly ta
ilored, and his red tie looked freshly tied. I was willing to bet he wore red just because he was meeting me and wanted to have a touch of the color of blood on him.
Like that would intimidate me.
“I agree with you. That’s why I told him if he pressed assault charges against you, he’d find out exactly how much worse I thought he deserved.”
I stared at him in shock. “That’s why he didn’t press charges? Because you threatened him?”
Gamble held up a finger. “I didn’t threaten. I merely informed.”
I laughed. “Right. Well, thanks for saving me the trouble of a lawsuit. And thanks for the hurt you put on him and a few others that were involved in Josie’s hazing.”
All of them were out of his club. Cannon was totally blackballed from racing and actually serving time for cutting her brake line. Stupid shithead didn’t know him sneaking in and cutting her line was on surveillance cameras. The little scene of harassment they pulled on her when she was fresh out of the shower and in the garage for clothes was all caught on camera, too.
When I saw Cannon in court, he looked worse than a baboon’s asshole. Something told me Gamble had some connections on the inside, and Cannon’s stay in lock-up while awaiting trial was anything but peaceful.
“A lot of men with the same amount of power I have do business differently. I don’t lie and cheat in my dealings. My deals are all honest.”
I didn’t say anything, just stared at him.
“But I’m not a fool, and I wasn’t born yesterday. This world is cutthroat, and when you have money and power, everyone always wants a piece.”
“That about sums it up.” I agreed.
“This wasn’t the first time scum has messed with my daughter. This is the first time it went on so long without my interference. She’s older now, has her own life. Even so, it probably won’t be the last time she’s a target for what she does and who she is.”
Just the words made my blood boil. I slammed the glass down on the other side of his desk and leaned over it to look at him intently. “I won’t allow it.”
Gamble’s mouth curved up on one side. “I know. I certainly hope you don’t get caught up in illegal dealings in the future, but I will admit, your checkered past seems more like a plus than a negative.”
I laughed. “Well, that’s a first.”
“When you have a daughter someday, you’ll understand.”
#Swag (GearShark #3) Page 32
