‘Marius. My friend,’ Nicander said gently. ‘Don’t torture yourself with thinking we can return one day. You’ve seen the seas are swarming with pirates, we’d be taken again and be in worse straits. In any case, even if we did find the gold to hire a ship, where would we tell him to go? I’ve no idea which direction Constantinople is, have you?’
‘I’m not a quitter! While I’ve got breath I’ll go after any way that sees me back with my kind.’
A stable boy arrived with their supper, two bowls of rice topped with chicken wings. He put the food down on the table, trying not to stare at them.
‘Rice, bloody rice! Don’t they have anything else?’ Marius grumbled but he tucked in hungrily.
Shortly after they had finished their meal Yi appeared at the door.
‘Comfortable?’
Nicander looked up. ‘Why, yes, Mr Yi.’
He gave an ill-natured grunt. ‘Don’t count on it, you bastards. I’ve got a lot riding on your performance and unless you come up with—’
‘In a couple of days you shall have such an act as will have them marvelling. Leave it to us.’
‘Nico, you’d better have this act worked out pretty good, or we’ll be in big bother with Yi.’
‘I have something in mind. Don’t forget, I’m a Greek.’
‘What’s that got to do with it?’
‘Saving your presence, Marius, we Greeks are the origin of civilisation, creating high culture even before you Romans hacked down your first barbarian. Then we were overmastered by you lot, who admired us so much you imported us in quantities to entertain you.’
‘So?’
‘Well, then we had us Greeks and our delicacies and refinement, being asked to lay it before those whose sensibilities are, should we say, yet to reach full flower.’
‘What’s your point?’
‘It is to say that we found a way to do it. Every time we were told to declaim a noble piece of art to such … we put on an act! One calculated to please. It never failed.’
Heading off an angry retort Nicander went on quickly, ‘So here we have a culture without philosophy, science and poetry. And we Greeks – and I count you as an honorary Greek, Marius – will go before them and give them what they want.’
‘Ha! Not me! I’d rather die in a ditch than take on pansy Greek ways! No act – I’m a Roman, bugger it!’
‘Marius, I don’t think you have a choice …’
Their ‘togas’ were now trimmed with purple, a capital offence in Rome. They contrived a pair of sandals each. Yi grinned at these; the Chinese would regard it as a shameful display of the naked foot.
Their hair was dressed to fetching curls, and they wore ‘laurels’, woven from the leaves of the tao chu tree. Yi insisted they use women’s white facial powder, which together with the kohl made them fearsome foreign devils indeed.
‘Are you prepared yet?’ Yi nervously blustered. ‘Hao presses me, the villain, and I can’t hold off for much longer.’
‘We’re ready, Beastmaster. Tomorrow night?’
‘Right! If it doesn’t …’ He made a cutting-the-throat motion, glared at them both, and stalked off.
They were taken along myriad passageways, past ornamental gardens and ponds of golden fish and into a high antechamber. The hum of conversation came from a larger room nearby.
The guards in the doorway were dressed in flowing full-length russet gowns over which they wore long purple surcoats with enormous sleeves. Each had a sword held upright in a ceremonial scabbard nearly half their height.
Nicander marvelled at the workmanship, the sense of style that was so alien, yet so elegant.
Then his mind snapped alert. He would soon be going on before this emperor and his full court.
Yi was nervously tapping his side. Marius stood grim-faced in his Roman costume.
An ill-tempered bellow erupted above the chatter and noise.
‘Get ready!’ Yi hissed.
The conversations died, replaced by a scraping of furniture, then silence.
Nicander peeked into the room. It was in shadows, lamps glimmering warm and gold but enough to see the audience. In the centre of the far side was a raised dais, shrouded in yellow muslin. On either hand were opulent figures in luxurious silks and elaborate headgear. Their jewels picked up the light in a dazzling display.
Yi scuttled in with a well-practised welcome and the patter of an introduction, then called out loudly in Aramaic, ‘Now, the foreign devils!’
At a signal from Yi, Marius marched in and halted, looking about him as though affronted. ‘I’m a Roman and proud of it!’ he roared, daring any to deny it.
To the side Yi translated with pop-eyed histrionics.
There was absolute silence and some of the ladies recoiled at the fearful sight.
‘Tremble all who see me, you bastards!’ bellowed Marius.
Whatever was translated brought a sudden snort of mirth from behind the curtain, which was instantly followed by a general tittering.
‘Is there any witless bugger here wants to argue?’
Marius paced about, glaring first at one individual then another. They jerked back in fear.
Yi rolled his eyes and burst into animated commentary which brought an excited buzz and laughter.
This was Nicander’s cue. ‘Hey ho, old friend!’ he said airily, as he strolled into the centre of the room.
Marius looked at him. ‘Hello, you old bastard,’ he boomed. They faced each other and began a complicated ritual of greeting, loosely based on the Moorish touching of head, lips and heart repeated several times.
Yi gabbled away and it brought a sudden roar of laughter.
‘Shall we eat at a tavern?’ Nicander suggested. This was relayed on; there was an immediate silence of anticipation.
‘Where?’ said Marius, shading his eyes and looking about him. This was met by another roar and those at the back pressed forward eagerly to see.
Yi gestured impatiently; a table and two stools were brought in.
‘Ah. We’ll go there.’
Nicander and Marius sat with much ceremony.
‘Serving boy!’
Yi scurried up with a slate, bowing and scraping.
‘Do you have any beef?’
Yi ‘translated’, his horrified eyes wide, while the audience convulsed at this reference to actually eating a lowly beast of burden.
Yi turned back and shook his head sorrowfully.
‘Then we’ll have lamb.’
In his aside Yi could hardly contain himself and the room bayed with laughter.
He turned back in mock solemnity and shook his head again.
‘What a useless tribe of shite-hawks. Then we’ll have something else,’ Marius said loudly, banging the table.
Yi’s translation brought a mix of hesitant laughter and apprehension. He beamed and made a quick exit.
He reappeared grandly bearing their repast, miming avoiding the ‘stench’ of a giant, swollen rat. There was a hiss of indrawn breath and the room fell quiet.
Nicander and Marius looked at it gleefully, rubbing their hands in delight.
Yi then solemnly presented them with oversized chopsticks which they accepted with every expression of politeness, and set to. The rat was a cunningly crafted imitation but the audience was unaware of the deception. Nicander swiftly secured the rear end of the rodent and brought it to his nose to savour its aroma.
Annoyed, Marius snatched it back, his lack of command of chopsticks ensuring it fell to the ground. He then picked it up in his hands and began stuffing it in his mouth, ignoring the cries of disgust that came from all sides.
Nicander leapt to his feet crying ‘foul friend!’ and wrenched out a small wooden sword concealed under his toga.
Yi’s commentary brought hoots from their audience.
Marius dropped the rat and reached for his wooden gladius and they joined battle, threading between the delightfully horrified onlookers until they could make their exit.
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br /> ‘Yes, well then. I agree – you did a fair job.’
Gruffly, he went on, ‘And the Dragon Throne sees fit to command our presence again tomorrow night for a repeat performance.’ He sniffed as though it happened for every act. ‘More guests – probably wants to show off his new diversion.’
Downing his rice wine, he relented. ‘Knew it’d go – there’s been nothing like it in the whole country. Kuei laos don’t grow on trees this side of creation. Well now, why don’t you sup with me. I’ve a line to the Emperor’s kitchen and get the leftovers. Mouth-smacking stuff, all you can eat – that is, if you can stand rich food!’
That night they dined on fish maw in broth, pork-stuffed eggshells, fragrant duck and a wondrous array of many other delicacies.
‘That kind of vittles I can stomach,’ Marius declared, flopping back contentedly.
Nicander had been giving some thought to their situation as they ate. It was all very well being treated like this but in the last resort they were slaves. And their situation could change as easily for the worse, and the key to it all was Beastmaster Yi.
It would be prudent to show an interest, perhaps an obligation to their master.
‘I have to say, there’s a lot to learn about this Chayna,’ he said with effusive respect. ‘Such an impressive country, so many wonderful things. But glory be, you couldn’t wish for a better place to take it in!’
Yi gave an odd look. ‘You think so? You’re new to these parts. There’s a lot you don’t know.’ He looked over his shoulder then leant forward. ‘Top of which is … our beloved emperor is a right murdering bastard the like o’ which puts your Nero in the shade. Let me tell you a bit about him …’
Slurping his rice wine he concluded, ‘All I can advise you is to keep out of it as much as you can, don’t trust anyone, let alone an official. Stay away from the whole court thing. There’s plenty of work here to keep you busy, animals need hucking out, feeding …’
Nicander nodded. ‘Now, about our repeat appearance. How about this for an idea …?’
The room was packed and lively with calls. Marius played up to it, advancing and threatening the hecklers with flaring eyes and foul oaths, while Nicander scurried right up to each, making much of not understanding a word they were saying.
It was his idea to close with the audience to make their presence personal and at every opportunity the two worked the gallery. It was a stunning success; each victim reacting in their own way to their confrontation experience, afterwards loudly telling their neighbour how brave they’d been.
At the same time it gave Nicander a chance to take in the Chinese themselves. He recognised the tall and acid-faced Hao but there were many he didn’t, such as the jolly-looking man in golden silk who was laughing so much tears were running down his cheeks while his lady clutched his sleeve, overcome with mirth as well.
Next to the Emperor, concealed behind his yellow muslin, stood a dignified figure in dark silk and a tall hat with sequin pendants. He was politely joining in the amusement but Nicander stopped short when he saw that where the man’s eyes had been, there were empty sockets.
Further into the recesses a chubby man in the finest robes in the room was lost in hiccups, his two friends almost helpless with mirth.
And standing at the back was the most beautiful woman Nicander had ever seen. In a sheer emerald silk gown edged in blue, her hair in an ornate style and her hands clasped within her sleeves, she held herself tall and patrician.
Her face was heavily made up and perfectly rigid; her gaze went through him without acknowledgement.
Nicander tried a comic turn but it failed – she showed no signs of emotion and a lady-in-waiting thrust in front of her, indicating in no uncertain terms for him to be off.
Rebuffed, Nicander returned to Marius for the final part of their act.
From somewhere behind the yellow gauze a bellow and chortle erupted to mix with the general heckling.
The happy noise fell away in awe and Nicander guessed that a critical point had been reached.
He fell to all fours and scuttled for his life to hide under a table. Marius picked up on it and showed every sign of terror as he too found a hiding place. They trembled, rattling drinking cups and utensils.
Yi fell in with the performance. He ran to the centre and in mixed Chinese and Aramaic implored them to come out. They refused, cowering in fright. Yi stumped over and pulled Marius out by his ear, followed by Nicander, which provoked helpless laughter. The two foreign devils then made grovelling obeisance, Byzantine fashion, contriving to fall over each other – and the evening was made!
Afterwards Yi came up to them with a nod of approval. ‘Humph. Emperor sends you this,’ he said, handing over a red silk packet, the traditional Chinese way of presenting a gift. Inside were four tiny boat-shaped ingots of silver. ‘No use to you, o’ course …’
‘We’ll treasure them as a keepsake from the Emperor,’ Nicander said quickly.
‘If you must,’ Yi sniffed. ‘Oh, and Grand Chamberlain Kuo desires a word. He’s a big nob, so watch your manners.’
He led them to him. It was the man Nicander had noticed before with the empty eye sockets.
When he spoke his tone was gentle but commanding and Yi translated with respect. ‘Asks from where you came.’
Nicander recounted their tale of two holy men untimely captured by pirates when on a mission of a search for knowledge. He hoped it would survive Yi’s translation.
Kuo civilly inclined his head at its conclusion and quietly replied.
Yi nodded. ‘He hopes you are not dismayed at your first exposing to the Chinese civilisation. Says that it’s not all like that. Can’t think what he means. Oh, and he says to keep from saying you come from over the mountains. Like I told you, they’re tender here about letting in spies.’
Kuo bowed and left, his hand on the shoulder of a silent companion who led him tenderly away.
There were others who came to see and touch, and Yi was kept busy until Nicander called a halt, pleading fatigue. He made his way back leaving Marius in the centre of an admiring crowd, making fierce gestures and growling street Latin at them.
He lay on his bed and closed his eyes, letting the rush of events settle.
It seemed there would be no more selling on, being slave chattels, human animals. They had made their mark and were here to stay and it should not be beyond the wit of any good entrepreneur to make something of it.
But he didn’t know a word of the language. He set his mind to finding a way …
‘Where’s Marius?’ he asked Yi as he arrived with rice wine and cups.
‘He’s being entertained by the Lady Yiu. Hope he can stay the course! Fancy a supper?’
Yi summoned a slave with a selection of dishes and began tucking in.
Nicander held back; he had a larger goal.
‘Beastmaster Yi. I’m concerned we can’t keep going with this same act. It’s only good for a few more shows, don’t you agree?’
Yi frowned. ‘What do you mean? It’s a bloody good act, keeps ’em in a roar all night.’
‘Yes, but they’ll tire of it. We should get something new on the way, ready to throw in when it happens.’
‘What are you thinking of?’
‘Well, something that we can take further, change a bit each night.’
‘What’s that?’
‘How about, “A foreign devil learns about Chayna”?’
He let it sink in then added, ‘We can have him learn chopsticks, dress in the wrong toggery, take what the ladies say amiss.’
Then he added casually, ‘And most hilarious, have to learn Chinese words, getting ’em all askew and wrong meanings, that kind of thing.’
‘Ha!’ Yi said. ‘I think you’ve got something there. Chinese, why, it’s like no other lingo you ever heard. Listen to this: ma, ma, ma, ma. Get it?’
‘No, what does it mean?’
‘The same word! You sings it four different ways, it’s g
ot four different meanings. What I just said was “horse, mother, curse, well?”. See?’
‘Not really.’
‘You’re a foreigner, that’s not surprising. Listen again – I’m going to say a word. Twice. But in different tones. Ready? Mai … Mai. Hear the difference? Mai, Mai.’
He could – the first tone started low and rose up higher, the second descended down. ‘Yes. What does the word mean?’
‘Well, there you have it. You now have two words! The first means to buy, the other to sell. Get it?’
Nicander’s brow creased. How odd – singing a language to get meaning. If ever he was going to get into business in this country he’d better be careful with his tones.
‘It must be very tough to learn.’
‘It is,’ Yi agreed. ‘But it’s got a good side. You Greeks have got words big enough to choke a horse. Chinese only has one beat, one word. You just string ’em along in a line to make your sentence.’
‘I think we’re on to something, Beastmaster,’ Nicander enthused. ‘Sing the wrong note, get a crazy meaning! We can really have fun with this …’
CHAPTER TWENTY-SIX
Nicander, a trader who was comfortable among the many tongues of the Mediterranean, took to Chinese quickly. Hearing it spoken on every side from morning to night immersed him in the sound and feeling of the musical language – and he began developing an ear for it.
On show evenings his deliberate same-word-different-tone efforts brought the house down. Marius could only learn his lines by rote but his rough Latin manner got just as many laughs.
The act became more daring: some in the audience, like Kuo, were beyond teasing but a number of the more pompous officials were easy targets and one night Nicander even went so far as to take the Crown Prince himself as his mark.
Kao Yeh, Prince of Ch’i, was fat and witless. He had little to do, as the Emperor had no intention of dissipating power, and spent his hours in pleasuring, both public and private. He and his sycophantic followers were regulars at every evening performance, their presence marked by unrestrained chortling.
The Silk Tree Page 17
