He rubbed the side of his jaw, trying to figure her out. “Why are you suddenly distancing yourself from me?”
She sat back in the chair and stared at him through veiled eyes. “Because you became my hero throughout this reign of terror. My prince, if you like. But when you brought it to an end, I realized you do this every day for a living. You move on from one ghastly, gory case to another, and then another and another. On the phone just now I heard you discussing a hit man and a robbery.
“Those aren’t just words to me anymore. A hit man is someone who actually goes out and kills people. Those brothers were planning to kill me. They became real. The whole situation became agonizingly frightening when Dan started stalking me. Then he tried to kill you. I’ve lived through a nightmare and will never be the same again.”
“Kellie—”
“Let me finish. The other day Dad brought up the possibility of my getting therapy. I didn’t want to hear it, but I think he’s right. Forgive me for throwing myself at you in the car. I didn’t know any other way to express my feelings. It shows how off-kilter I am. You’re a man and you responded like any red-blooded man. But I’m a wreck, Cy.”
His stomach roiled. “So what are you saying? That you take it all back? That you don’t want to see me again?”
“Yes— No— I’m not explaining myself right. I would love to be with you again and again, but I can’t bring myself to do it because—”
“Because what?”
“I’m afraid I’ll lose you while you’re in the line of duty. The other night you made yourself a target for Dan to shoot you. I was there, and I was dying inside. I went through that experience with you. Don’t you see?” She got to her feet.
“I know that when you go to work, you’re going to put yourself in jeopardy laying your life on the line every day, or night, depending on the circumstances.” She clung to the back of her chair. “You asked me why I sounded sad tonight. I’ll tell you why.
“I saw your sister and her fiancé so happy, and I was so envious. She never has to worry when he goes to work at your dad’s law firm that he’ll be shot or blown to bits by a bomb or stabbed to death. I know there aren’t any guarantees in this life for any of us, but he’ll probably live a long full life and raise a family with her.
“I don’t see that in your stars, Cy. I’m being honest. I couldn’t handle it if anything happened to you. Though I’ll never forget you, if I don’t see you again, hopefully in time I’ll fall in love and get married to someone who’s—”
“Safe?” He cut her off.
“Yes!”
“Where’s the barrel racer who stares down danger every time she enters the arena?”
“For heaven’s sake, Cy. You can’t compare that to what you do. I don’t care about me. It’s you who matters! Just hearing about this new case you’re going to work on makes me sick to my stomach. I don’t want to think about it. I know someone has to protect us from the evil out there, but I don’t want the man I love to be the one who does it.”
He grabbed hold of the table, hoping he’d heard her right. “You love me?”
She swallowed hard. “What do you think I’ve been saying all this time? Yes, I love you. I’m madly in love with you. Isn’t that crazy? We only met nine days ago, yet I know to the marrow of my bones it’s true.
“But I don’t want to be in love with you. Your poor parents didn’t have a choice when you made up your mind what career to go into, but I do. So I’m going to ride away from you while I still can.”
“That’s not going to solve anything,” he said in a grating voice.
“Maybe not, but when I’m off on my rodeo circuit, I’ll be spared knowing that you were shot and killed by some lawless felon while I was gone. I don’t want to be anywhere around when that happens. Now, I think you’d better go. The vet is going to be out early in the morning to give my horses a checkup.”
The fact that she loved him would help him get through all the other things she’d said that he hadn’t wanted to hear. She needed more time.
“Will you let me hold you for a little while before I leave?”
She shook her head. “No. I don’t dare. Kissing you in the car was a big mistake.”
Like hell it was...
“Kellie? Look at me.”
“Please don’t ask me. I enjoyed the evening with your family. Let’s let it rest there with that memory.”
“Would it help if I told you I’m head over heels in love with you?”
“For the second time, you mean?” she asked in a sharp tone. “If I recall, you told me you barely escaped marriage the first time around.”
“That’s because I wasn’t ready for a commitment.”
“Even so, someone will come into your future who will be the right fit for you. Maybe a woman in law enforcement who can deal with the risks to her own life and yours. They say the third time’s the charm.”
“You’re being intentionally cruel, but it’s not working. You and I were on a collision course from the moment we bumped into each other in Bandera.”
“That’s what they said about the last meteor coming toward Earth. But before it got caught into our gravity, its orbital path suddenly missed us and flew in another direction.”
“Your metaphor doesn’t apply to us. We got caught in the gravity you and I created together. There’s no greater force. You can take off for South Dakota, but we’ll never be able to escape each other’s pull.”
“I pray you’re wrong,” she said with tears in her voice. “Goodbye, Cy. As I heard Vic say to you, watch your back. Might I add, keep Sylvia close. She gets to go with you wherever you go because she has no issues. She even gets to sleep under your pillow and will be with you to the end. What a lucky woman.”
Kellie... Kellie...
He reached for his jacket and tie. “Will you walk me to the door?”
“I’d rather not.” She clung to the chair back. “Is this new case going to take you to Brownsville?”
“Maybe, but it’s nothing for you to be concerned about.”
“You see what I mean? Already I’m sick with worry because there are so many killings down there and you haven’t even left my house.”
“I’m sorry you heard me on the phone.”
“So am I. Forgive me for being so awful to you, Cy. I wouldn’t be alive today if you hadn’t come to my rescue. Please go before I make everything worse.”
She was in so much turmoil, he realized there was nothing he could do right now. “I’m leaving.” He crossed through the living room to the door. After opening it, he waited to see if she would call him back, but it didn’t happen. The evening had turned into a nightmare of new proportions.
Cy pushed in the night lock and shut the door. After reaching the car, he sat there behind the wheel for a few minutes. Kellie loved him. But after what she’d lived through, if he asked her to marry him, then he needed to get into a different line of work.
The thought of leaving the Rangers tore him up inside.
The thought of losing Kellie ripped his heart out.
Chapter Ten
“This is Lydia Olson from Rider Rodeo Connection in Rapid City, South Dakota, for the Black Hills Pro Rodeo. The reigning champion barrel racer for tonight’s win is Kellie Parrish with a l3.90 score. You’re just racking up the wins, girl. Congratulations!”
“Thank you so much.”
“I had to pull out my cheat sheet to list all your stats. You’re a Wrangler NFR Qualifier ten times, a College National Finals Qualifier two times, the National High School Rodeo Finals Qualifier four times, and the Pro Wrangler Finals winner in Oklahoma City, Oklahoma, three times. And this year has been the best for you so far.”
Kellie nodded. “It’s been a good year for me.” A year that had changed her li
fe in ways she would never have imagined, but she didn’t want to think about Cy right now. “My horses have been terrific and I’m hoping to do well at Finals in December. There’s a lot of money to be won and the competition is tough. You’re only as good as your last win, so you can’t let down. I’ve got six more rodeos to go before I head to Las Vegas.”
“You’ve thrilled the folks tonight and I wouldn’t be surprised if you come out number one in Las Vegas.”
“I’m excited to try.”
“Where are you headed next?”
“Cheyenne, Wyoming.”
“Well, we wish you luck. Thank you for talking to us for a few minutes. What plans do you have to celebrate tonight?”
“I’m going to go pet my horse before I do anything else. She was perfect tonight.”
“There it is, folks! Kellie Parrish, who stunned the crowd on her champion horse, Trixie.”
“Thank you.”
Kellie left the arena and hurried to the rear of the pavilion to see Trixie. Cody had already taken care of Starburst.
Trixie neighed when she saw Kellie, who rushed up to her and threw an arm around her neck. “You were wonderful, Trixie. Here.” She pulled a horsey treat out of her jeans pocket. The palomino gobbled it noisily. Kellie chuckled as she led her by a lead rope out the back of the facility to the trailer.
For the next half hour she went through her routine of removing the saddle and bridle, followed by a brushdown before loading her inside the trailer for the night. Earlier in the day Kellie had mucked out her stall, where she’d provided water and had put fresh hay in the net.
“Good night, Trixie. Dream of grassy meadows and sunshine.”
Her horse neighed in response before Kellie shut the door.
“That horse is half human.”
“Hey, Cody.” Her dark-haired buddy had parked next to her. “How’s Starburst?”
“I rode her for a while. She’s in good shape. Great job out there tonight. I’ve never seen you ride better. Frankly, after knowing what you’ve just been through, I don’t see how you stayed so focused.”
The determination to erase Cy from her mind had played a big factor.
She smiled at Cody. “I couldn’t do any of it without you, but I guess you know that. We’ve made some good money. Depending on what happens at Finals, we should both have enough to get started on our careers after the New Year.”
“That’s what Jenny and I are counting on. Want to celebrate with us tonight? We’re going to grab a bite and take in a movie.”
“Thanks, but I’m exhausted. I’ll follow you back to the RV campground and call it a night.”
They both started up their trucks and drove the short distance to the outskirts of Rapid City. After checking on her horse once more, she visited Starburst and gave her some horsey treats. Then she went into her trailer and took a shower. Once ready for bed, she phoned her parents. They celebrated her win by informing her they would fly to Greeley, Colorado, in two weeks to watch her performance. What would she do without her loving, supportive parents?
After she got off the phone, she posted a message on her blog to keep her fans informed of tonight’s performance. Once that was accomplished, she returned phone calls from Olivia and Sally, who told her Manny was competing at the rodeo in Greeley. Kellie would look forward to seeing them there and introducing Sally’s bull-rider-champion husband to her folks.
At last ready for bed, she got under the covers and turned on the radio. But the country-and-western station played the kind of music that talked of breakups and unhappiness. She turned to KBHB broadcasting from Sturgis, South Dakota. Lots of farm news and world news interspersed, but she wasn’t able to concentrate and finally shut it off.
In the dark of the night she couldn’t kid herself. She’d been hoping she’d hear from Cy all week. It hadn’t happened. Kellie hadn’t seen him since last Sunday night. They’d parted on such an ugly note, it had left her shaken. Was he deep into his new case?
When she couldn’t stand it any longer, she looked up Luckey’s number on her contacts list. The temptation to find out what he knew about Cy had been driving her crazy. Tonight she gave in to it and phoned him. The call went directly to his voice mail, but she held off from leaving a message and hung up. She was a fool. Luckey would know she’d called and would probably tell Cy. So much for going cold turkey. She eventually fell asleep, furious at herself for succumbing to the impulse.
The next morning Kellie got up and dressed. After eating a bowl of cereal, she planned to walk both her horses before they all started the drive to Wyoming. On her way out of the trailer, her cell rang. She checked the caller ID and felt a swift surge of adrenaline. It was Luckey. She answered on the third ring.
“Hi, Luckey.”
“Hi, yourself. I saw you called last night, but I didn’t get a chance to return it until now.”
“I shouldn’t have bothered you.”
“Surely you didn’t think I’d mind.”
Like Cy, he had those special qualities and charm that made him stand out. “No. I’ll be honest. Ranger Vance and I said goodbye last Sunday night. Since then I’ve been out on the circuit. But I couldn’t help overhearing part of a conversation he had with the captain. It had something to do with a case that could take him to Brownsville.” She moistened her lips nervously. “I’ve been a little worried because of all the tension on the border.”
“I’m on another assignment and can’t discuss any cases, but as far as I know all is well with him.”
“I guess I’m having a hard time letting this go. After he saved my life, naturally I don’t want to see him injured or worse.”
“It’s understandable considering he went undercover to protect you. You wouldn’t be human if you didn’t come out of your experience unchanged. I’ll tell you a secret. When I applied to join the Rangers, there was a saying printed at the top. ‘Decide that you want it more than you are afraid of it.’ I thought about it long and hard before I submitted it.”
Kellie had to stifle a moan. “That explains the spirit of the Sons of the Forty.”
“It explains why you’re a rodeo star,” he replied. “Not everyone is driven by the same passion. Since the guys and I saw you at the Bandera Rodeo, we’re all planning on you winning the World Championship.”
“Thank you for those kind words. For everything,” she half whispered. “You’ve given me a lot to think about. Watch your back, Ranger.” She hung up to prevent further conversation.
Decide that you want it more than you are afraid of it. Such a simple statement, yet such profound wisdom.
* * *
AFTER HIS FLIGHT from Brownsville to Austin on Saturday evening, Cy went straight to his house to get some much-needed sleep. So far the Ravelo case wasn’t opening up for him. If there were any family members still living there, Cy hadn’t found evidence of one. He’d been concentrating in the wrong place and would pursue his angle on Montoya’s tie-in to the robbery now that he was back.
Sunday morning he got up late and checked his laptop for emails. Nothing from Kellie, no phone calls. She had his cell-phone number, but it seemed she’d meant what she’d said two weeks ago. She didn’t want to love him. Damn if she wasn’t proving it by her silence.
He glanced at her rodeo schedule on the website, then read her latest entry on her blog. Last night she’d had another winning performance in Cheyenne, Wyoming. Two wins in two weeks. Without the specter of the stalkers, she was going ahead full steam on her road to a dazzling championship in Las Vegas.
In a dark mood and feeling empty, he left for the office. On Sundays it was fairly quiet around there and he’d be able to get through the paperwork that had been piling up while he’d been gone. Halfway through it, his cell rang. The caller ID said Bronco Parrish.
His heartbeat quickene
d and he clicked on immediately. “Mr. Parrish?”
“No. It’s Nadine Parrish.”
“Hello, Nadine. How are you?”
“I’ve been fine until just now.”
“What’s wrong?”
“I’m sorry to bother you, Ranger Vance. Maybe it’s nothing, but I found something in Kellie’s mailbox. I went over to her town house this morning to check on things and water her plants. Maybe this isn’t important, but I thought you should know.”
He frowned. “What is it?”
“Besides her usual mail, there was another typewritten envelope with her address, but no return address. It’s postmarked two days ago. I brought the mail inside, but I haven’t opened it.”
“Are you still at her condo?”
“Yes.”
“Don’t touch it. I’ll be right over and park in front.”
Cy’s mind raced with possibilities as he left headquarters and drove to Kellie’s town house. Maybe it was simply a note from a friend, but something in his gut told him that wasn’t the case. He reached into the glove compartment and pulled out a pair of latex gloves from a box he kept there.
Nadine had opened the front door and was waiting for him. Judging by the lines on her face, she was worried. They’d all assumed this case was over. He hoped to heaven he was wrong about a third party being involved with the stalkers.
She gave him a hug he reciprocated. By tacit agreement they went into the kitchen and sat down at the table, where she’d left the mail. The white envelope stood out from the rest of the bills and ads.
“Let’s see what’s in here.” He put on the gloves and opened it.
You’re a little fresa who should have been eliminated a long time ago. No one wants a badass like you around in your skinny designer jeans.
This wasn’t the language that came from either stalker. The type was different. If he didn’t miss his guess, it was sent by a jealous female. Dan could have been using her, possibly her car. He lifted the typewritten note to his nose. There was a faint smell. Not perfume. Because it had been posted only two days ago, maybe residue lotion had clung to the paper. Kellie’s mom eyed him nervously.
The Texas Ranger's Bride (Lone Star Lawmen Book 1) Page 15
