"So, what about you and Chad? You haven't been over there in two weeks. Are you still engaged?" Julie asked stirring a little sugar into her coffee and adding some coffee.
"I've decided to break it off with him…" Sandy admitted, hanging her head.
"Break it off…but why? I mean, don't you love him?"
Sandy reflected on that question for a long moment. She went to stand by the window, looking out. "No…I guess I don't. At least not that way…"
"What's changed?" Julie's brows rose at this news.
"A lot of things. I guess I never was in love with Chad. I was just swept up with him. I mean, he stormed into my life, taking it over. It was thrilling, exciting, and I did hero worship him I'm afraid. Just like everyone else in town. But the past few weeks I've realized I never really loved him. Not enough to marry him."
Julie sipped her coffee. "I guess it's better to know now than later…"
Sandy nodded. "I guess you think I’m fickle."
"Not at all. And I’m certainly not one to compare notes with on that score. Lots of girls think they love someone, look at Wendy." Julie sighed.
"I guess we are more alike than I care to admit. But Chad swept me up in a whirlwind of romance, and I guess at the time I needed that. I had a few bad experiences myself. And don't get me wrong, I do love him, but not enough to marry him," Sandy said sadly. "I don't want to wait all day and half the night for him to come home to me. And being a doctor means waiting, all the time. I don't want someone who's dedicated to his work twenty-four seven. I want a man who can't wait to get home to me. Who enjoys mundane things like buying groceries and changing diapers?"
"Sounds like you almost regret not loving him," Julie said quietly.
"No…no regrets. Chad and I never did anything but kiss. I think he's a wonderful man, but I want a little more than that. I want a fire inside me when he touches me; I want someone who thinks I'm the best thing since ice-cream. I want to be his world. And I'm sorry to say it, I don't want a drunk every night because he's fought a war and thinks he has every right to remember it." Sandy shrugged. "Sounds silly and notional when you say it out loud…don't you think?"
Julie shook her head and sighed. "Not at all. When I came home and saw Cade, and realized how sweet a man he was, and how…I just can't tell you how much I fell in love with the man all over again. Because I was finally over my crush with Wade for one thing. And because I was a full grown woman who knew what she wanted. Now this is gonna sound silly, but I never wanted another man to touch me…except Cade. Don't laugh, but he's the only man I ever made love with, the only man I ever want to make love with. I ran away for more reasons than one. What Cade shared with me that night in the barn…I suddenly realized was everything I wanted. He shared his love. Oh I had other boyfriends in between, I'll admit. But I finally quit running away and started running toward what I wanted, and everything fell into place for me…everything." Julie smiled.
Sandy stared into her happy face. "That's what I want. A man that really loves me…and not the McKay fortune…"
"I told you that would be hard to find…" Julie warned her.
"Well, let me know when you find that one man who loves you for yourself…and…I wasn't going to say anything but…I'm pregnant," Julie burst forth with the news, her face a ray of sunshine.
"Oh Julie…that's wonderful…" Sandy grabbed her and hugged her. "When?"
"Looks like it will be next June. Now I haven't told Cade yet, so don't go telling anyone else, okay…I just had to tell someone though, I couldn't keep it a secret any longer. I'm so excited I'm about to bust."
"Letty?" Sandy questioned.
"Has probably already guessed since I threw up the other morning after breakfast with her." Julie laughed. "And I haven't told Kellie either."
"Oh I am so happy for you." Sandy kissed her on the cheek. "Then I've got to continue helping you and Cade. Before long you are gonna have a baby to take care of. You're going to need my help even more."
"Yeah…I'm not far along yet, barely two months, so don't worry there's time for me to teach you some things about how to handle the kids."
Sandy sighed heavily. "Well," she shook her reverie and got up. "I better get back to the ranch. Let me know when you tell Cade and Kellie so I can congratulate them."
Julie chuckled. "Of course and I want to thank you for helping us. You don't know how much we appreciate it. And just so you know, those kids love you."
"They do?" Sandy perked up.
"They sure do…" Julie laughed. "You’re very good with kids. You're going to make a fine mother someday, Sandy."
"I hope so. I'm so thrilled for you." She kissed Julie again and finally went home.
~*~
Dodger followed her home from Julie’s. He loved running beside the car with her. But he didn't come up to the house. Sandy didn't think much about it, she figured he must have gotten side-tracked as he often did in the woods. Her thoughts were on Julie and the new baby that would soon fill the old ranch house with joy. She wanted to make the baby something, and she had to think about that.
When she heard a crashing sound though she got out of her car and looked about. It sounded like a wreck. She hoped not. She was so happy today she didn't think anything could spoil the day.
But she was wrong.
She looked up the hill and there was Mike, coming toward her, with something in his arms. She watched as he came closer.
"Oh…oh my God…" she cried out as the object in his arms barely moved against him.
"Sandy, you got to help me…I just hit your dog…" Mike was saying.
Sandy's eyes clouded with tears and she ran toward him.
There wasn't time to ask questions. She helped Mike take him to the porch.
As he laid Dodger down, the dog whined and looked up at her with the saddest eyes.
Tears ran down her cheeks as she swiped at them… "Go get Doc Haskell," she told Mike.
"Where does he live?" Mike asked, his face screwed up with worry and concern.
"About a half mile down the road. You'll see his sign out front," Sandy informed him as she got busy with some warm water and bandages.
When Mike left she was able to quit crying long enough to console her dog. But Dodger wasn't going to make it. His injuries were too serious, and he had already lost so much blood; Sandy didn't want to think about it. She could tell just by looking into his eyes that she couldn't do anything to help him. It broke her heart.
"Oh I’m so sorry boy…this should never have happened. I should have put you in the car, and then it wouldn’t have happened." But there was a good reason she didn't. Dodger and her played chase games with the car and it wasn't the best habit to get him into. She guessed she was partly to blame.
The dog whined and licked at her hands as she tied the bandage around his ribs.
"Don't die on me…please…please don't die on me," Sandy cried.
Hearing the commotion, Caleb came running up the hill. "What's going on? I heard a crash, was anyone hurt?"
"I don't know…all I saw was Mike and….Dodger."
"Of my God. He's been hit bad…" Caleb bent down to examine his wounds. Seeing how distraught Sandy was, he tried to make her go inside, but Sandy wouldn't budge.
"If he dies I want to be with him…" she cried.
"Okay, but let me tend him…You are too upset."
Sandy moved away, knowing that she was too heartbroken to tend him and that she had to get a hold of herself. Dodger was going to die, and she wasn't sure how she would handle that.
"He was chasing my car…" Sandy began.
"You hit him?" Caleb frowned.
"N-no. I don't know what happened. One minute he was beside me, then I turned into the drive and I didn't see him any longer," Sandy explained. "I just heard the crash and then Mike came down the hill with Dodger in his arms."
"Mike ran over Dodger?" Caleb frowned. "Well honey, I'm sure it was an accident."
"Yeah, an acci
dent," Sandy repeated.
Mike returned with Doc Haskell, but there was little the doc could do.
"Sorry it took me so long to get here. I had a patient…Mr. Dillard's new stallion took sick and I had to finish up with him," the doctor explained.
Sandy shook her head and more tears fell down her cheeks as she half glanced at Mike. "What happened?"
Mike moved toward her. "I picked Chad up from the golf course, we were going home. We saw your car and Chad wanted me to follow you so he could talk to you. We didn't see Dodger until it was too late." Mike's face was pale, his voice strained.
"So you hit him?" Sandy concluded.
"I am so sorry…" he began, his face was a turmoil of emotions.
"I'm sure you are. And you were drunk too?" she accused as she came closer and got a whiff of bourbon.
"Sandy…." He started to explain further, but he threw up his hands and shook his head. "I guess that's about the size of it."
Sandy glanced at him and then Dodger who had already passed on. Tears fell like a bucket of water fell on her. "Go home Mike…please."
Mike hung his head and turned away. "I'm sorry. I'm very sorry…" She heard him utter the words as she ran for the house.
Chapter Thirteen
It was a week after Dodger died that Chad called.
"Honey, are you all right?" he asked, concern lacing his voice over the phone.
"Yes…I'm fine," Sandy answered holding back her feelings as she answered Chad on the phone.
"I wanted to come over, but Mike said you were pretty torn up about your dog. I figured I'd give you some time. We haven't been together in a long time. I want to see you…" he insisted.
"Chad…it's not a good time."
"I know you are down, but honey. We can get another dog. Don't you see? And you can train him the way you want and eventually you won't hurt any more…" Chad explained. "And Sandy it was an accident."
"Yeah, one that might not have happened if Mike hadn't been drunk."
Chad hesitated.
"I'm sorry. I shouldn't have said that," Sandy apologized.
"It's okay, darling. I can forgive you anything," Chad whispered.
"Can you?" she asked trying to keep the bitterness out of her voice. "You don't replace a friend like that."
"But…don't be silly. He was just a dog, not a human…" Chad said with frustration.
"I guess to you, that's all he was, but you don't seem to understand that some things in life can't be replaced. Dodger had been here for years," Sandy explained. "He was like part of the family."
"Honey, you are just distraught. I want to be there for you. I want to come over and comfort you and be with you. I've missed you," Chad said softly. "Haven't you missed me a little too?"
"Actually Chad…" She had been about to tell him the engagement was off but Wendy came in slamming the door and Sandy turned her attention on her. "I'm sorry, I've got to go. I'll talk to you later."
Wendy sent her a stormy look. "What are you looking at?"
Sandy came in and eyed Wendy. Her little sister looked like something from a street corner. Her shorts were way too skimpy, and her blouse hid nothing to the imagination.
"When I picked those clothes out for you it was just to get Wade's attention…" Sandy began, wishing she could find the right words for her sister's sake. "I didn't mean for you to wear them as daily work clothes."
"And it did get his attention. You were right about that. He's paying attention now…" Wendy smiled. "But if I stop wearing them, he might stop looking. So I'm gonna wear them all the time. Besides, you're the one that's a prude around here. Wouldn’t hurt for you to wear something a little more…."
"A little more what?" Sandy's brow raised with her anger.
"Feminine I guess is the word." Wendy gave her the once over.
"You are taking this too far, Wendy." Sandy was determined not to lose her cool although her sister was pushing her buttons.
"Why? Wade likes it. He wants me…and I want him. He likes looking at me. Now when he looks at me, he smiles. Kisses me even. I've made no secret of it. You taught me how to be a woman, now you want me to go back to being a little sister again. A poor pathetic little sister, with moon eyes for Wade. Well, no thanks. I've got his attention, heck I've got half the cowboys on this ranch's attention. And I like it, and nothing is going to stop me from tying him up in a neat little package." Wendy shot her a venomous glance.
"You've changed; you aren't my little sister anymore. In fact, I don't know you."
"You should, you helped create me…" Wendy laughed.
"Wendy, this isn't the way to get Wade…" Sandy began. "Only God creates people and this is certainly not how he created you."
"Really, seems to be working fabulously. I've got Wade in knots he wants me so bad…"
"What has happened to my sweet little sister?" Sandy cried, as tears clouded her vision for a moment.
"Well honey, you just opened a big can of worms when you suggested these clothes. Everyone likes them, at least all the men do. I get noticed when I walk down to the barn now. I'm no longer wasting my time. I get looked at like you and Letty and Julie used to. Now it's my turn. And I like it. Being sweet little Wendy never got me noticed, but you and Mike changed that for me. I guess I should thank you. Thank you for showing me how to entice a man, and Mike for teaching me how to kiss a man. I liked Mike's kisses, and I like Wade's kisses even more, and before it's over I might try a few more out for size. Make way for little sister, because I'll never be that little naïve girl who followed Wade all over the ranch, with stars in my eyes again. I've come of age. And I like myself. Can you say the same?" Wendy laughed and left her staring with her mouth open.
Sandy got on the phone. "Julie…you've got to come over and talk to Wendy. She's really lost it."
Julie hesitated. "Okay, I'll be over in an hour; keep her there."
"I'll try…but Julie, it may already be too late. She isn't the same girl we grew up with, I can tell you that."
"She can't have changed that drastically."
"Don't bet on it." Sandy hung up the phone, as Wendy pranced about the place in her ultra-short-shorts, and show-all shirt. Now even her hips moved differently, provocatively. When she bent over her breast nearly fell out of her blouse and her shorts left Sandy wanting to cringe.
Sandy felt embarrassment crawl all over her.
"So when's the wedding?" Sandy asked waiting to hear her answer.
"Wedding? Who said there was going to be a wedding. I'm having too much fun to stop now." Wendy laughed. "I need to play the field, learn more about men. Find the right one everyone talks about. I'm too young to get married. I like the attention. And your only problem is you are jealous."
"I thought you loved Wade." Sandy came closer.
"I was in lust for Wade, still am," Wendy touted bravely.
"Well, if it's just sex you want you could probably pick that up on any street corner," Sandy informed her.
"Did you think all these years, looking at his all-male body all I wanted was a few kisses from the man? Grow up, Sandy. Quit acting like the flying nun. Tell me, did Chad dump you or you dump him?" Wendy raised her head a tad and gave her an arrogant smile.
That was it. That broke the camel's back. Sandy didn't think, she reacted. "Grow up…" she shouted and struck Wendy on the cheek as hard as she could.
Wendy winced and blinked back tears as she stared into Sandy's angry glare.
"How dare you!" Wendy exclaimed and ran to the bathroom upstairs.
"Oh I dare. I dare a lot where you are concerned," Sandy shouted, trembling with rage.
Sandy stood there shaking in her own anger. How could she have hit her, and so hard? But this was not her little sister. This was a demon woman, a she-devil.
Sandy burst into tears.
~*~
By the time Julie came over, Sandy was a basket case. On one hand she was ashamed of how angry she had gotten. On the other hand, she wished sh
e'd been sterner.
"My goodness, what has happened now?" Julie asked, seeing the silent rage in Sandy.
"Go on up. Meet your new sister. She's still in the bathroom. I just slapped her silly," Sandy cried out.
Julie walked slowly up the stairs, and Sandy followed.
"All right, come out of there, Wendy!" Julie instructed.
"I'm busy putting on my make-up. I'll be out in a minute…" Wendy protested.
Julie used a key she had obtained many years ago for when one sister wouldn't get out of the bathroom. The door swung open and Julie gasped.
"I don't believe it!" Julie shook her head, glancing from Wendy's head to her toes. "What on earth has possessed you?"
Wendy made a face. "It's called make-up, have you forgotten how to use it?"
Julie's brows knitted together, and her hand came up to slap her sister. But she stood there, her hand shaking so bad to control the impulse. "Shut your filthy mouth, young lady. I'm still older than you."
She reached for a washcloth and wet it at the sink, then proceeded to scrub Wendy's face.
Wendy protested and fought at her, but Julie had the advantage and held her head at an angle to get as much of the crud from her face as possible.
"Sandy encouraged me. It's her fault and Mike's!" Wendy accused.
"She encouraged you to flirt, not act like a cheap little whore in front of all our employees," Julie snapped, not letting go of her sister until she had removed all the make-up.
"Our employees like it…" Wendy began.
Julie's brow knitted again and this time she did slap her. Wendy's face was fire red.
"Turn me loose…" Wendy insisted. "You have no right to hit me…" she cried.
"Not until I'm through with you. Now sit down on the toilet while I teach you a few tidbits of life." Julie shoved her down.
Wendy was near tears, but ready to blurt almost anything out loud now.
Sandy watched the two of them and knew swiftly that Julie had all the control right now.
"Now you shut up and listen, little girl baby. You've wanted Wade so long you've nearly lost your mind. Sandy was trying to help you. You took it a step further. She wasn't trying to make a tramp out of you, but a woman. There's a difference. And as long as I'm alive I will never let you walk out of this house alone, dressed like that, again. Never. Do you understand? You represent the McKay's and we don't look or act like this. Ever," Julie threatened.
Twelfth of Never (Book 3 of the McKay series) Page 13
