by Jojo Brown
It was an unbelievably comforting feeling. For some reason, the thought came to me that this was what it felt like to be an unborn child, held lovingly within her mother’s womb. Sounds came to my ears that I can only describe as the rushing of blood through massive arteries. An immense sensation of un-abiding love and peace surrounded me.
A soft stirring fluttered across my hand as I felt the amulet lifting. I forced my eyelids open. The five of us were no longer sitting on Aunt Rachel’s living room floor; instead, we hung there, suspended within some sort of milky substance. Even though it was flowing all around us, it had no effect on any of us. I knew that it was some sort of liquid, but none of us was in the least bit damp.
Aunt Rachel, Chris, Adam, and Dad were all rocking slowly in and out of the circle, with their eyes closed. They all chanted something so softly it was barely audible. I could not understand what they said; they were all speaking in some unknown language.
A kaleidoscope of colors swirled through the substance around us, momentarily coming together to form breathtaking scenes before dissolving and flowing away to re-form another scene somewhere else.
Among many other wonderful things, I saw the Red Sea, parting and then flowing back together before washing over my head to form The Great Pyramids. They dissolved and rushed down to become The Grand Canyon. Swirling above me, they flattened out and the smooth surface of the Sahara Desert drifted past me to liquefy and become an ocean filled with killer whales, spiking and singing their haunting calls.
My eyes fell again to the amulet, which was now spinning on end just above my fingertips, so fast that it now appeared to be an orb, rather than a flat disk. As I watched, a silver fog formed around it, expanding to enclose all of us. It grew until it engulfed everything within its cool, glistening mist.
The colors were gone, lost within the mist. Nothing existed except the five of us and the mist. All of the wondrous sounds were swallowed up by the deafening silence and I felt a tragic sense of loss.
Directly in front of me, behind my father and Aunt Rachel, the mist began to swirl. It appeared to be thinning in that one small area, as though a breeze had come to blow it away. A shape slowly took form within the swirling mists, the shape of a woman.
As she stepped from the mist, it parted as a veil before her. Where it caught upon the tips of her wavy chestnut hair, it glistened like tiny diamonds. There was something oh-so-familiar about her.
She held her head just slightly lowered, so that she seemed to look out at the world through her lashes. The set of her shoulders gave the impression of self-confidence and an ingrained ability to take life on with a single flutter of her lashes.
She walked, more like glided actually, softly placing her toes on the ground first, instead of coming down on her heel as most people do.
As I sat there, in stunned silence watching her intently, she gathered up the soft folds of her silver gown, held it out with slender fingers, and slowly twirled, as a child showing off a new outfit would do. Coming to stop again before me, she lifted her beautiful hazel eyes to fix me with her gaze …
I saw a universe held within her dancing eyes. I saw myself, deep within her soul. The me I wished to be; free, happy, confident, and unconfused.
Leaving the amulet spinning in the circle of love created by my family, I stood and slowly made my way over to her. Holding out my left hand to her, existing for that moment, only to feel her touch, I knew that was the moment I lived my whole life for.
Twenty-eight
I knew her. With every fiber of my being, I knew her. She had been right there at my side, sharing every moment, every breath, every achievement or disappointment. The knowledge of her washed over me, filling every nook and cranny of my soul.
“Amy,” I breathed. “Where have you been?”
A soft smile moved across her lips as she looked at our hands, clasped together, fitting in each other perfectly.
“I have always been right here, Ella. You know that now. We have been together, since before time,” her soft whisper washed over me, gently caressing my skin, threading through my hair, to hold me, lovingly.
“I do remember holding you as we floated in the dark liquid. You and I were as one, long before I knew anyone else, but you went away. I couldn’t hear you anymore. I could still feel your hand in mine, but I couldn’t feel you anymore. You left me alone, there in the dark. Why, Amy? Who are you? What does this all mean? Why do I suddenly have all these stark memories when I haven’t been able to remember any of it for so long?”
“Oh, Ella, I am you and you are me. We are two halves of the same whole. I am your twin, Ella. We began the journey together, both of us intricate clusters of cells and electricity, multiplying and growing, one beside the other.
“We were meant to walk through this life, side by side, but something went wrong. Somehow, the decision was changed. You grew stronger and as you did, I grew weaker. I could no longer hold onto the amulet with you, I could no longer absorb its power.
“I could not hold onto you either, but you never let go of me. As I left the earth-bound casing, I begged you to just open your fingers and let me drift away, but you refused. You said that if you let go, you would be lost too.
“You held so tight, Ella. You held on to that empty case, right until you burst into the world. As you were born, you pulled the black, shriveled body into the world with you.
“Those attending the miracle of your arrival were so deeply affected by that sight, some of them never fully recovered. It never should have happened that way. If you could have had a different beginning, you would have had a different life. The fear that was instantly deep-seated in them, never known.
“You would have been allowed to grow and flourish, just the way it was planned. You would have allowed the knowledge to flow through you, because our mother would never have been made afraid of you. Instead, at the moment of your birth, she was filled with the knowledge of your purpose. She saw it as a threat and soon made the decision that she had to stop you.
“I was with you in the woods that night, when she found you. I was with you, as she raced to the house and filled the tub. It was my breath that filled your lungs as the water surrounded you. It was I that convinced the others to leave you, when you chose the love of your mother, over your own life.
“It was I that slipped into your mind and put the block in place. I blocked all your memories of the others and your purpose. You wanted to live your life, you wanted to love and know love. You wanted to be like everyone else. I did my best to give you that.
“Many times, over the years I have had to close your ears to them. They have tried to make you hear them. I have always stopped them, so that you could have your life and be protected from the world.
“I have seen great cruelties in the world, Ella. If the others had their way, you would have been at the mercy of those who would wish to harm you. I could not, would not, allow that to happen.”
I was still so confused. Nothing was making any sense. It seemed the more answers I got, the more questions I had. “Why now, Amy? You say that you have been protecting me my whole life, so why am I learning about everything now? And why did Adam spend his entire life remembering tomorrow’s date? What is the big deal about tomorrow? I am still so confused about everything.”
She gave me a look that spoke of patience, mixed with anxiety. “Tomorrow is the day of the rejoining, Ella. It is the day when all shall be revealed. We have come together, so that you can receive a message. You have worked very hard to find your way here and the journey has almost reached its end. Now, you will need guidance to follow it through to completion.
“Within the pages of the oldest book, upon her highest shelf, you will find your way. You know what is asked of you, Ella, just trust yourself to do what is right.”
The mist began to close in around her as she spoke. “NO! Amy, don’t go, please, there is so much more that I need to know!”
Her voice came once more, from the m
ist. “Three-thirteen is when they’ll be seen! Until then my sweet, sweet, Ella.”
And she was gone...
Twenty-nine
Finding myself once again sitting in the middle of Aunt Rachel’s living room floor came as a bit of a shock. Looking round at my family, I saw tears glistening on each face. They all still had their eyes closed and Aunt Rachel was still humming softly as they continued to rock.
The amulet was once again lying motionless in my palm. As I closed my fingers around it, Adam closed his fingers around my hand. I looked to him, sitting there so quietly beside me. “Did you find her, Ella?” he whispered. “Did you find Amy?”
“Yes,” I forced past the lump in my throat. “Did you know about her all along, Adam?”
A sly smile lit his face. “No, Ella. I just found out about everything. While we were sitting here, I went away. I went to a place filled with white light; Nanny was there. She was baking her famous apple pies, hundreds of them, Ella! She was surrounded with them.
“She told me about you being born with a twin that never came home to play with us. She told me that you are special, for more than just what we see now.
“You are one of the chosen few and the others will meet you today. She told me to help you. She made me promise that I would. She sent a message for you, too.
“She said that Aunt Rachel is hiding the paper. She put it in the book with the others and it is time for you to get it back. I have no idea what that means, but there you go. It is another part of the puzzle, left for you to figure out.”
Tears filled my eyes, spilling over my lower lids and tracing down my face in tiny rivers. “I wish I could have seen her, Adam. I would truly love to sit at her kitchen table, eating one of her pies again. We had so many wonderful talks over a slice of warm pie. Her pies could fix most any problem, I really miss that!”
He reached out to brush a tear from my cheek and I fell into his arms, sobbing on his shoulder. “I don’t even think Nanny’s pies could tackle what’s going right now, Ella,” he whispered into my hair.
“I know, but I am not strong enough for this, Adam. I don’t know what I am supposed to do, and I am so scared.”
From within his crushing embrace, I watched over his shoulder as Aunt Rachel made her way to the bookcase against the far wall. My father carried a small set of steps over to her; he must have left the room to get it, without my even noticing.
Aunt Rachel looked over to me once, before she stepped up to reach the top shelf. Running her fingertips down the spine of one of the books, she began to tremble. It was almost as though she were afraid of what we would find held in the pages of that book.
When she looked down to Dad, he laid his hand on her waist. “I know, Rachel. It’ll be all right, you have no choice.”
With a deep steadying breath, she grasped the top of the book and pulled it from its spot on the topmost shelf. Climbing down from the steps, she turned, hugging the book to her breast, gently stroking its cover as she came to sit by me again.
With a sweep of their arms, Dad and Chris cleared the surface of the coffee table. Books, papers and albums tumbled to the floor. Aunt Rachel placed the big book in the center of the table, keeping her hands pressed flat on the top of it.
“Before we open these pages,” her voice cracked with the emotions she was clearly struggling with. “I want to make sure you all understand that I did not hide this by choice. This was put into my possession, under the oath that I would protect it from the world at large, until it was deemed necessary to have it known.
“Just now, we all experienced different things. From what I heard, Ella met her twin sister and Adam met with Nanny. Chris and Arthur, you probably both went somewhere as well, to learn an important lesson. I personally went back to the moment this book came to me.
“I have never felt fear because of this, or because of anything involved with it. Back then, I was told what had to be done and how to do it. I was told that the book had to remain a secret, until this day.
“Today, the others have released me from my oath of secrecy; they say that you need to know everything, Ella. This book belongs to you.”
Gingerly touching the tip of my finger to the edge of the large black book, I looked at my aunt. “What is it, Aunt Rachel? It looks like a Bible.”
“Oh my dear, it is much older than the Bible,” she breathed. “‘Man’ wrote the Bible. While I am sure that they did their level best to record the events of the time, with as much accuracy as they could, there were bound to be some mistakes.
“It is after all, an interpretation of events that we read in the pages of the Bible. In addition, it has been re-written and translated so many times, who knows how many errors are held within its pages.
“This book came long before the Bible. This holds the history for millions of years, not simply thousands. This is the history of so much more than humankind, it is the complete history. Within these pages, there are answers to every question ever asked, as well as some questions that no one ever thought to ask.
“Between the pages of this book, is also where I hid your birth certificate. Oh, I know you have one in your wallet, but it is a fake. I have the original, the one that holds your true name as well as that of your sister.”
My true name?
Thirty
There it sat; the original copy of my certificate of live birth. I had never seen one that looked quite like it, six inches by approximately twelve. It was truly the strangest looking document I had ever seen. It was hand-written, bearing the signature of the attending physician as well as that of the mid-wife.
Everything looked the same as the certificate I had, the date and time matched mine, as did the location of birth. The only thing different was the ‘name of child’. While mine stated my birth name was Ella Marie Marshall, this other one had it as
ELUNA OYET ANOOR Marshall.
“Eluna Oyet Anoor? What kind of name is that supposed to be?” I exclaimed, looking at my father. He had been sitting very still, with his head lowered since helping Rachel get the book. When he heard my exclamation, he raised his face to look at me through watery eyes.
“It is the name that was chosen for you, many years ago. Your mother changed it to Ella, after you were born. She felt that Ella was a much easier name for you to live with. She always referred to the two of you as Ella and Amy. It was her that you heard speaking of Amy, as a child. She was certain that she kept seeing her.”
Looking again to the page in my hand, I found a scribbled note in the corner, which I had not noticed before.
‘Name of un-baptized stillborn twin – ZANDEMY MISHEROL Marshall’
“Zandemy? Amy?” I watched as Dad nodded his head, ever so slightly. “Zandemy and Eluna. Oh my God!”
I opened my hand to look once more at the amulet. “The amulet – ‘Z’ and ‘E’ – Zandemy and Eluna. The amulet had our initials on it. I was born with this; Amy and I held it before we were born, our names were marked on it, before we even drew breath!”
Dropping the amulet to the table, as if it had burned me, I jumped to my feet.
“Aunt Rachel, please help me. I am really getting scared. What does this all mean?” I was feeling overwhelmed by all the new information that I was trying so hard to process all at once.
Aunt Rachel came to stand with me, “Try to stay strong, my dear. None of us have all the answers that you are looking for, but today is the day that the questions will all be answered. That much I do know.”
Moving back to the table, she motioned me over, “Now come and sit. We have more to do.”
As I lowered myself once more onto the pile of cushions, Chris ran his hand down my arm with such tenderness; my heart skipped a beat. “Don’t be afraid, Ella. Together, we are going to figure this all out,” he softly assured me.
Opening the big book again, Aunt Rachel pulled another piece of paper from between its pages.
“I believe this is what Amy told you to find.” She passed
the page to me.
I was quite nervous to look at what was marked on this one. I sat for a few minutes, with my hand pressed flat on top of it on the table. When I felt that I had steadied my nerves enough, I unfolded the single sheet of paper. It was brittle at the edges, sort of brown and crumbly, so I was very careful with it.
The sight of the blank page came as more of a shock than if it had been filled top to bottom, with some absurd message. I could feel the tears stinging my eyes and my throat was burning. For some unknown reason, I continued to stare at the page, tears falling freely to land on the parchment.
I really wasn’t seeing the paper at all; my mind had flown away as soon as I opened it. I was with Amy again. We were standing facing each other, in the middle of a field of yellow wildflowers. Suddenly, she pulled her hands free of mine and turned to run. She yelled back to me, ‘Find me if you can…’
At the same time, I heard Chris telling me to look again. I wanted to chase after Amy, I wanted to find her, but I wanted to know what Chris wanted me to look at too. I had to make an agonizing decision; I turned my back on my sister and looked towards Chris.
“Look at what, Chris?”
“At the page, Ella, look at the spots where your tears fell on it.”
Looking down I was amazed to see that letters had appeared in the moisture from my tears. I nervously accepted the glass of water that Adam was holding out to me. Dipping my fingertips into the cool liquid, I let it drop onto the paper.
In no time at all, I was able to see a message. It simply appeared and flowed together as the moisture filled the page. The script was beautiful; it reminded me of calligraphy, with its flowing lines and curlicues.
