I didn’t say anything.
‘Yes, I can assure you. Have you seen the new bottles of antibacterial mustard and ketchup they put on the tables? I can’t fault them on their hygiene.’
‘No, I haven’t,’ I replied, wondering for a moment if he was joking. But no.
So essentially they poisoned people with their salty, sweet, deep-fried food, but they countered that by putting antibacterial mustard and ketchup on the table. As long as it killed the germs, who cared whether or not the food was healthy or tasted natural?
Flavour was very important to me: the freshness and smell of fruit without sugar or ice cream on it, or a vegetable cooked without oil; the texture and savour of a perfectly ripened Vacherin cheese, the bouquet of a full-bodied wine – all were perfectly wrapped gifts straight from Mother Nature.
‘And it’s cheap,’ Dominic continued. ‘And we don’t have to wait to eat. You’re hungry, you want to eat right away.’ He was apparently still trying to convince me – or maybe himself – about the good side of Fifty State Burger, even though he was planning to sue them.
Just as a car needed to be filled with gas to keep it running, so, for my patient, food was nothing more than fuel. He didn’t seem to appreciate what he had on his plate as long as it gave him immediate satisfaction and filled his stomach.
I longed to be able to tell him that when I baked a cake, or something was simmering on the stove, a delicious, joyous aroma would permeate my apartment … not a foul greasy odour from frying meat.
I needed to know more about Dominic’s family background.
‘Are you married?’
‘Why, you think women today can cook?’ he laughed. ‘Even my mother didn’t cook much.’
So it’s partly her fault, then, if today you find yourself in such bad health, is it?
Whatever next? Parents being sued for not having fed their children properly?
This made me think about the latest commercial for Super Vital soup. It showed a domestic scene from the sixties when many mothers had already stopped cooking and would simply open a tin and serve a liquid substance that was supposedly soup. Their slogan: ‘Good soup like your mother used to serve you! From the can!’ Yummy!
‘Today, women and men can enjoy cooking,’ I said, thinking how much my husband loved to cook.
Unfortunately, our hectic life didn’t give us much opportunity to cook together, but Paul and I made the most of our time at weekends, when we prepared dishes in advance for the week ahead.
‘I don’t see how it could ever be enjoyable to have to feed a family. My mother used to struggle all the time in the kitchen, when we didn’t go to Fifty State Burger.’
As a mother, I’d decided to work only part time in order to be home to cook most of the meals for my children, just like my own mother had done for us. Usually I enjoyed it. I was proud to have passed on my passion for cooking to my children, and always welcomed them in my kitchen. I wanted mealtimes, especially dinner, to be almost sacred daily events which the whole family enjoyed together.
In fact, we’d already agreed Paul was going to cook that evening, while I prepared my certosino and a mincemeat cake for Christmas.
‘But don’t you take time to eat with your family?’ I asked Dominic.
‘Most of the time my wife orders the kind of takeout that I don’t like – sushi or bean curd, stuff like that. She and my twin girls eat together sitting on stools at the kitchen counter.’
Dominic turned his head sharply from the picture on the wall and looked straight at me.
‘Do you have children, Dr Elaine?’
‘Yes, but if you don’t mind I’d rather ask the questions,’ I answered with my special disarming smile.
I didn’t talk about my family with my patients. After everything I heard in my consulting room about other families, I knew how lucky I was. It almost made me feel guilty sometimes.
‘Of course … sorry!’
His beautiful pale-green eyes returned to the picture on the wall.
‘No problem. You know we’re here to talk about you, Dominic.’
‘My wife just thinks about her life coach.’
‘Her life coach?’
‘Yes, lots of people have them nowadays because they don’t have time to find solutions to their little problems.’
Why doesn’t she go see a therapist? What are we here for?
‘There’s this guy – he looks like a model – who comes to our house regularly. He helps my wife to live a better life, I guess. She does gym exercises with him, and he gives her a list of food and drinks that she is supposed to consume if she wants to stay fit. My wife’s name is Tiffany,’ he went on, ‘and I like her the way she is. But she has this obsession about losing weight all the time.’
‘Doesn’t that encourage you to do something about your own situation? I mean, um, your health condition? You seem to have difficulty breathing sometimes.’
Silence. I wondered if Dominic was pretending not to have heard my question.
‘You would not believe what Tiffany buys now: drinks that block fat, or give her extra energy; pills that reduce her appetite. I’m not convinced it’s good for her. I’m afraid that she might get sick, especially since she works so hard.’
Dominic had a point. Diet and energy-boosting products could be damaging to people’s health if they weren’t taken properly.
‘And now she wants a divorce,’ Dominic blurted out, ‘because she’s sure that she’s going to meet the man she’s always been waiting for. I’ve basically become a burden to her.’
But look at you, Dominic! Why don’t you take care of yourself? You seem to be a nice man.
‘Of course, I’m convinced it’s the coach who’s turning Tiffany’s head. He’s younger, good-looking and he has a decent job.’
‘What do you do for a living, Dominic?’
‘I don’t work. I can’t. I get tired too quickly.’
Oh, please!
I wondered how he and his wife managed to make ends meet. Maybe they lived on Tiffany’s salary. But he didn’t give me a chance to ask.
‘And besides, I’ve got enough money to do what I want to. I’m entitled to a small disability pension.’
‘So what do you do all day?’
‘I mostly watch TV.’
I might have guessed.
‘That’s the reason I want to sue Cable Boon.’
‘But you’ve just said that you have enough money for your needs. So why do you want to sue the cable company if not for financial reasons?’
‘It’s the principle of the thing. I just want to show them – and tell the world – that Fifty State Burger and Cable Boon are bad, that they’re the cause of my problems.’
‘Which are …?’
I knew exactly what his troubles were, but I wanted him to say it.
‘Um, well, because of my obesity, I feel tired all the time, and Tiffany wants to leave me.’
Well, it’s about time you realised there’s a link.
‘It’s also a kind of personal revenge, just to show my wife I’m capable of accomplishing something since she always tells me I’m a useless fat slob.’
‘You could make an effort to try to be a little more attractive to her.’
‘It’s too late.’
‘But physical appearance isn’t always the most important thing,’ I said.
‘Really? What about the images that you see everywhere?’ Dominic answered. ‘All those anorexic models in the fashion magazines? Why do you think Tiffany wants to lose weight? To look like them! I’d be amazed if some of them ever eat at all, judging by the way their bones stick out.’
He was right. Our society defined beauty by an extreme slenderness that didn’t reflect the way women – and men – really looked.
I glanced down at my curves, which Paul said he liked so much.
‘That’s a fair point, but what about your health and wellbeing?’
No answer. Just another big sigh.
&
nbsp; ‘Do you walk sometimes?’ I asked.
I loved walking, and I was lucky to live close enough to work to walk there most days. It was a pleasant route through a park and attractive neighbourhoods, and it took me only twenty minutes.
‘I walk Bobo twice a day.’
Suddenly there was hope!
‘About five minutes each time, and that’s good enough for the old dog.’ Dominic added, ‘For me as well. I get tired quickly.’
My hopes vanished.
‘Try walking a little bit every day. It would help.’
‘There’s a Fifty State Burger across the street from my house. And they can deliver twenty-four hours a day.’
‘You could move away from Fifty State Burger,’ I suggested.
‘Believe it or not, two months after my wife and I bought the house they built that Fifty State Burger across the street!’
It was true that there seemed to be a Fifty State Burger on every corner in the city and especially in the suburbs.
‘You said your wife wants to leave you. How did she tell you?’
‘She just said that she was tired of me and that she wanted to meet someone else. Pretty common nowadays, isn’t it?’
‘Unfortunately, yes.’
True enough. Most of my clients came to me for therapy following a separation. It could be a frightening experience for many people. The person who left was often to blame, but I could feel a certain sympathy for the wife. But I wondered: had she ever tried to help Dominic?
‘She was a little overweight as well. You know, working crazy hours, sitting at a desk all day and eating fast food for lunch.’
And having to live with I-am-not-working-or-taking-care-of-myself Dominic …
‘Then a woman started work at her company and talked to Tiffany about how her coach had saved her life. My wife decided to call him.’
‘Do you think there’s something going on between him and your wife?’
‘No, I think he prefers men.’
‘It’s interesting to see how some people can have an impact on others,’ I asserted.
‘I guess that’s the whole point of hiring a coach, isn’t it?’
‘Indeed.’
‘It costs enough money, that’s for sure. But I don’t say anything. It’s Tiffany’s money, after all.’
I decided to try once again to get him to talk about his health.
‘I’m concerned about you, Dominic. Um, health-wise, how are you coping?’
‘OK, I guess. I don’t see doctors much. For what they have to say, it’s just not worth it.’
‘What made you decide to come see me, then?’
‘My wife. It’s a part of the divorce procedure, she says. And I said to myself, well, why not, after all? I like the kind of relationship Tony Soprano has with his therapist.’
I was speechless.
‘It’s a good show, don’t you think?’
Not really …
I’d watched one episode when I’d been staying at a hotel, and since everyone was talking about the show I felt I had to catch it. Well, there was far too much violence, and far too many F-words for my taste.
‘I don’t have a TV,’ I said, almost apologising.
‘What?’ Dominic shouted, almost falling off the sofa. ‘I’ve never met anyone who doesn’t have a TV!’
It hadn’t always been that way. One evening, almost ten years previously, our son had broken our TV irreparably while he was trying to fix it. We’d got rid of it, and Paul and I just hadn’t bought a new one. We read more, and often went to the movies. And Manhattan had so much entertainment to offer!
‘Yeah, The Sopranos is not quite proper enough for you, I suppose. But you might have found it interesting since the therapist is one of the main characters. It’s a really good show,’ Dominic affirmed, nodding his large head with conviction.
I went over my notes quickly.
My patient let out another big sigh. ‘Yes, it’s all about personal revenge. I’m not only a big fat wimp, I also want Fifty State Burger and Cable Boon to pay for what they’ve done to me!’
Right …
‘Tell me about your daily routine.’
‘I get up at nine. I have breakfast.’
‘What do you usually eat for breakfast?’
‘Bacon, sausages, fried potatoes and a cola. You know, it’s really convenient, the things you can buy today. Everything is precooked, and all in the same package! You just put it all in the microwave.’
I wondered if even performing such a simple task was a major effort for him.
‘Then I take a shower.’
I’m glad to hear it.
‘Then, at ten, the best of my Cable Boon premium package programmes starts.’
‘And you sit down for the rest of the day?’
Dominic seemed hesitant. Was he going to be able to accept the fact that he needed to make drastic changes to his lifestyle?
‘Well, yes, most of the time. Except when I have to take Bobo for a walk, and when I go out to Fifty State Burger. What else do you expect me to do in my condition?’
‘What more do I need? I feed my body and my mind. Nothing else matters. Of course more sex would be appreciated, but, well …’
Let’s keep that for another session.
‘What’s your favourite Cable Boon programme?’ I asked dutifully, though I really didn’t want to know more about Cable Boon, which was famous for its dimwitted drama and comedy shows, game shows, trashy movies, reality shows and incredibly biased, phoney news programmes.
Television, and especially Cable Boon, had been described as ‘the opiate of the people’ in the previous month’s psychology journal: a scourge of society that encouraged people’s tendency to live vicariously through others and to believe everything they saw on TV while being completely incapable of managing their own lives.
After Dominic had told me all about his favourite programmes, I asked, ‘What about watching the healthy food channel? It might give you some ideas for healthy meals for you and your family.’
Dominic looked at me strangely, as if I’d suddenly started speaking Chinese. Then he smiled, his handsome eyes turning back to the picture on the wall.
A couple of minutes passed in absolute silence. I waited. I wanted him to think a little.
While I waited, I envisaged him as a typical couch potato, eating peanuts and potato chips, quaffing beers, and ordering greasy meals from Fifty State Burger when he was too tired even to walk across the street. Bobo, the old dog lying at his feet, probably ate the same terrible food. Poor creature!
I wasn’t sure whether to feel sorry for Dominic or not. After all, I firmly believe that our destiny is mostly in our own hands. Who else was to blame for his situation if not himself?
‘Tell me about your girls.’
‘They’re ashamed of me. They’re both thin, nineteen years old. They’re in their first year at college. They eat sushi and bean curd, just like their mother. I don’t know much more about them than that because we hardly talk.’
Well, if Dominic didn’t spend the whole day in front of the TV there would probably be a bit more conversation in the house.
After heaving another sigh, he went on, ‘You know, having a father who stays home is a pretty shameful thing for the girls. Men are supposed to be the strong financial pillar in a family and bring home the money.’
‘It’s pretty common to see men nowadays who are unemployed or decide to work at home to take care of the kids,’ I asserted.
‘Not in my world, Dr Elaine.’
He was right. I must have seemed like a dreamer to him, someone from another planet. Men were still feeling the pressure to be successful at work, and bring home money to support the family.
‘Would you like your wife to stay with you?’
Dominic fell silent once again. He possibly didn’t know how to answer this question: he either didn’t want to be left alone, or, like so many men, he needed a woman only to cook his meals, do his la
undry and provide occasional sex.
‘You know, Dominic, you can tell me.’
‘Yes, of course. I’ve got nothing to hide from you. At this point, how could I? Besides, Dr Elaine, I can talk to you so easily. But, you see, the thing is, I don’t know if I want my wife to stay.’
He looked at the picture facing him even more intently.
The phone rang. Alice told me that my next patient had arrived.
‘Do you wish to come back next week?’ I asked Dominic, smiling.
‘Why not?’ he answered immediately. ‘You’re the only woman I’ve had a proper conversation with for a long time, and I really love this picture.’
‘Matisse is my favourite painter.’
No reaction.
‘What are you going to do for Christmas?’ I asked.
‘My wife and girls will go see my mother-in-law in Tennessee, and I’ll stay here. It’s not a problem because I love the TV programmes at Christmas.’
‘Sure,’ I muttered under my breath, thinking about the cakes I had to make that evening because the children and Paul’s parents were coming for Christmas. It was the best gift we could have wished for.
‘But you know that the festive season is supposed to be all about love and forgiveness? Why don’t you try to forget about taking your revenge on Fifty State Burger and the cable company and think about some good things you can do for yourself?’
‘I know I’m not supposed to ask questions, but are you going away for the holidays?’ Dominic asked rather than answering me.
I told him that it was a time of year when my patients needed me more than ever, so we usually stayed here in Manhattan, and our families came to us.
‘Have a beautiful Christmas, Dominic! I’ll see you next week then.’
We set a time for our next meeting, and Dominic heaved himself off the sofa and left, a broad smile on his generous features.
I told Alice to send in my next patient in ten minutes. I needed time to think over the somewhat odd conversation from my session with Dominic. I quickly wrote down a few more comments and some questions that I intended to ask Dominic next week. I wanted to help him. He was very touching, in an exasperating yet perfectly honest way. I had a feeling that he would somehow manage to extricate himself from his dreadful situation. My first impressions were rarely wrong.
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