by Maya Banks
“How so?”
“Meditation. Spiritual guidance. Mind control. More and more I think the key is going to be in mental fortitude. The ability to control, not eliminate, the shifts.”
Eerie calm descended over Ian. “So we learn to live with it,” he said tonelessly.
“Yes,” Marcus said softly.
Ian cursed and dragged a hand through his hair. “Then why are we even after Esteban? What’s the point?”
“Because we need to know what he did,” Marcus said. “We need the chemical compound that was responsible for changing you into shifters. My ideas are only that. Ideas. I don’t have proof to substantiate them. I would have said it was impossible to create a chemical that could so radically change your make-up, but Esteban did. If there is a chance he has a way to reverse the process, then we need to find it.”
“He’ll die for what he’s done,” Ian vowed.
Braden walked over, his gaze questioning. “What’s going on, Ian? You look pissed.”
“I’ll tell you about it later,” Ian said. “Marcus needs our blood before he leaves.”
“He’s turning into a regular bloodsucker,” Braden muttered.
Marcus smiled. “Why do you think I only come out at night now?”
Ian put his hand on Braden’s shoulder and squeezed. He wasn’t sure just who he was comforting, Braden or himself. Braden shot him a curious stare, but Ian looked away before following Marcus out of the room.
* * *
Katie opened her eyes and wondered why everything felt so numb. Then she wondered why she was so comfortable. And then she realized she was in a bed. A very nice, comfy bed with pillows and sheets.
She was dead. That was the only explanation. And she was okay with that as long as she didn’t have to move.
Her hand appeared in front of her face, and she blinked since she recognized it as her hand, but hell if she remembered her brain telling her hand to move. For that matter, she knew it was her hand but it didn’t feel like her hand.
“They gave you some good shit, huh.”
She yanked her head sideways to see a large black man standing a few feet away in the shadows. His expression was indecipherable, and because of that, she couldn’t figure out whether he was one of the good guys or the bad.
And then she reminded herself there were no good guys.
He chuckled. “No need to get all uptight. You’re as helpless as a kitten right now so there’s no need to entertain fantasies about me.”
She looked at him in disgust. “If I had a knife, I’d stab you.”
“And if you had bigger tits, I’d fuck you.”
She almost laughed as she looked down at her chest. “No one’s ever complained that my tits were too small.”
“I didn’t say they were too small. Just that they’d have to be bigger. I have a big dick. I need plenty of cleavage to slide it between.”
She did laugh this time and then groaned when the wound in her abdomen protested. She reached down only to find thick bandages covering the area. Cautiously she looked back up at the man still standing against the wall.
“Uh, you weren’t the one who tended my cut, were you?”
White teeth flashed in a grin. “Nope. That would be Marcus, the team doc. He got the pleasure of seeing you naked. Although I got a peek, and I have to say, not bad, girl. Not bad at all. I can see why Ian and Braden are so growly when it comes to you.”
She flipped him the bird. “Fuck off.”
He chuckled and walked forward. Lord but he was big.
“Did nobody ever tell you that steroid use will shrink your penis?” she asked calmly.
He threw back his head and laughed. “You know what, I like you, Katie. I like you a lot.” He held out his hand as he drew closer to the bed. “Name’s Tits.”
“For the love of God,” she muttered. “Tits? No way your mama named you that.”
He grimaced. “No, she named me Theodore, but if you ever tell anyone, I’ll have to cut your throat.”
“What the hell are you doing, Tits?” Ian demanded from the door.
Tits rolled his eyes and jerked his thumb in Ian’s direction. “See what I mean about growly?”
“She needs to be resting,” Ian said gruffly as he walked closer to the bed.
“Doc done with you?” Tits asked.
“Obviously.”
Tits shrugged. “I just need to know because I’ve got to fly the man out of here.”
“Yeah, we’re done. He’s waiting for you.”
Tits turned to Katie and flashed her a grin. “I guess I’ll see you later, Miss Katie.” He blew her a kiss then sauntered toward the door and past a scowling Ian.
After Ian watched Tits go, he turned back around to stare at Katie. There was something in his gaze that discomfited her. Or maybe it was the fact that she’d kissed his brother—correction, he’d kissed her. Was it absurd that while she’d enjoyed Braden’s kiss very much that she’d wondered what it would be like to kiss his brother? To have him touch her?
It made things more awkward than they already were, and that was the last thing she needed.
He sat on the edge of the bed at her side. “How are you feeling?”
“Kinda freaky,” she admitted. “Did you give me some weird drugs?”
“Marcus gave you a sedative so he could stitch you up, and then he gave you pain medication so you wouldn’t hurt when you woke up.”
“That would explain the inability to recognize my limbs,” she said ruefully.
“It’s good that you aren’t in pain.” He touched her cheek tentatively, as though he expected her to protest. “You’ve had far too much pain in the last little while.”
She wasn’t sure what was weirder. The fact that Braden had kissed her and Ian was treating her as though he harbored attraction for her, or that she welcomed his attentions even as the memory of Braden’s kiss simmered in the back of her mind.
Could just be the drugs.
She liked that explanation, and it absolved her of the need to analyze the weird chemistry between the three of them.
“Where are we? Besides somewhere in Austria.”
“Innsbruck is the closest city, but we’re holed up in the mountains. We’re a short hop from Italy, Switzerland and Germany, so we have options.”
She raised an eyebrow. “Options? Are we going to need them?”
He pushed her hair from her forehead and continued to run his fingers through the short strands. She wondered if he even realized what he was doing. For that matter, she wondered why she was lying here so docilely, allowing him to touch her and worse, enjoying it.
It was definitely the drugs. Or maybe she just really wanted him to touch her.
“It’s always good to have options. Escape routes.”
She nodded, yawning so big her jaw nearly caved in. He smiled and ran a finger down the jaw she’d almost cracked.
“You need to get some more rest.”
“It’s the drugs,” she said. “You could lay down with me. You look as tired as I feel.”
They stared at each other, and she wasn’t sure who was more stunned by the invitation, her or him.
“Drugs,” she muttered. Definitely the drugs. Liar.
“Give me a minute and I’ll take you up on that,” he said.
Oh hell, he wasn’t supposed to accept. But then she didn’t exactly withdraw the offer either. He gave her a long look before slowly rising from his perch on the edge of the bed. Was he aware of what she was offering? Was she?
“Get comfortable. I’ll be back as soon as I see Tits and Eli off.”
Yeah, he was aware. His eyes positively simmered with sexual awareness as he turned to leave the room. Which left the question of whether she was. Despite the dullness of her limbs due to the drugs, there was still a tingling excitement. She wanted Ian to touch her. As for what to do about Braden, she wasn’t sure. She wanted to explore her attraction to Ian, but she knew damn well there was explosive chemist
ry between her and Braden.
Chapter Twenty-Three
“We’re going, but we won’t be far,” Eli said. “According to Tits’ intel, Esteban could be heading this way. We don’t know because he hasn’t shown his face yet. He’s laid low ever since we busted out of his compound in Switzerland. For now, his attention has shifted from me and anything to do with Falcon or CHR. His henchmen are on the move, and they’re looking for Katie. We’re going to make sure he knows where she is, so be on your toes. The Falcon secondary is moving into place as we speak, so you won’t be alone. Keep us posted, and we’ll do the same.”
Braden nodded and bumped fists with Tits and then Eli.
“You sure you two going to be okay?” Tits asked.
“Yeah, we’ll be fine,” Ian said. “If Esteban rears his head, we’ll roll out the welcome mat for him.”
Eli grinned. “I’d like to see that.”
“Let’s do this,” Tits said as he headed for the door. “Check you boys later.”
Eli followed, leaving Ian and Braden standing alone in the small entryway of the mountain cottage. Braden started to walk toward the kitchen when Ian put a hand out to stop him.
“I need a favor, man.”
Braden stopped and looked curiously at him.
Ian ran a hand through his hair as his stomach knotted. God, this was awkward as hell. He hadn’t felt this dumb since he and Braden were foster kids flipping a coin to see who got to ask Tracy Hawkins to the school dance.
“Look, uh, I need you to stick around. With me and Katie, that is. Not directly, but I could shift, and I don’t want to hurt her.”
Braden looked incredulously at him. “You’re planning to have sex with her? Now? After I kissed her? After giving me shit about kissing her?”
Ian’s cheeks tightened.
“And you want me to watch?”
“Christ,” Ian mumbled. “I knew it would all come out wrong. You know damn well I’m not asking you to watch. Okay, maybe I am. Goddamn it. I’m not trying to turn this into a kink-fest. I just want to be with her for a while and not worry about turning into a damn jaguar and ripping her throat out.”
“Dude, do you forget that Marcus just put about ten stitches in her gut? Or that I kissed her?”
Ian sighed. “First of all, I’m not going to hurt her. I’m aware of her injuries. I don’t need a lecture like I’m some kind of goddamn kid. Second, are you telling me you have a problem with this?”
Braden stared at him for a long moment. “Would it matter if I did?”
Ian hesitated a little too long.
“Yeah, that’s what I thought.”
“Do you have a problem?” Ian asked again.
“Maybe? I don’t know. I guess I would have taken it a lot better if you’d have said, ‘Hey, Braden, let’s go make love to Katie’. But it came out more like, ‘Hey bro, I’m going to go have sex with Katie and I want you to watch to make sure I don’t flake’.”
“I guess this time I don’t want a threesome,” Ian said in a low voice.
“She’s attracted to us both, Ian. You know that.”
“Yeah, I know. And I’m okay with it. I just don’t want my first time with her to be…hell, I don’t know.”
“You got condoms?”
Ian’s head came up. The abrupt change in subject damn near gave him whiplash. “Fuck me. No, I don’t have goddamn condoms.”
Braden grinned. “Aren’t you glad at least one of us has sex on the brain all the time?”
Ian sighed in relief, more over the fact that Braden didn’t seem pissed than the fact that he had condoms. Although the condoms didn’t hurt.
Braden went to his bag and pulled out a couple of packets then tossed them one at a time in Ian’s direction. Ian caught them and shoved them into his pocket.
“I doubt she’s going to like me watching,” Braden said.
“If it’s done right, I don’t think she’ll object. As you said, she’s attracted to both of us. I guess the sooner she’s used to both of us being around, the sooner she’ll accept having sex with us both at the same time.”
Braden cocked his head and studied Ian. “And is that going to happen, Ian? Because I see you being mighty possessive when it comes to her. If I ask the same thing of you tomorrow, as in you back off while I make love to her, how are you going to react?”
Ian shoved a hand through his hair and blew out his breath in frustration. “Look, can we get into this another time? Preferably before Katie changes her mind about inviting me into her bed?”
“No, we can’t,” Braden said simply. “Because you aren’t going in there unless we’ve reached an understanding.”
Ian’s eyes widened in surprise. “So it’s like that.”
Braden nodded. “You damn right it is. I kissed her, remember? I’ve been attracted to her from the beginning. The only reason I’m cool with this is because she’s attracted to us both and because a woman has never been a problem between us in the past. Now you need to tell me if Katie is going to be that problem.”
Ian shook his head. “No. She’s not going to be a problem, Braden. But what if it’s a problem for her?”
“Then we let her decide on her own,” Braden said softly. “But fair warning, Ian. If she can’t accept both of us, then I don’t plan to sit back and let you take her from me.”
Ian stared at his brother in astonishment. When had they decided to stake a claim? Hell, all he wanted was sex. Wasn’t it? And if it was just sex then why would he care what Braden did afterward? And why did the idea of Katie not accepting both of them and choosing Braden instead leave a very bad taste in his mouth?
He glanced toward the bedroom where Katie was. Part of him wondered if the smartest thing would be to just leave her alone and not open the door to a whole host of potential problems. The other part of him knew if he didn’t make love to her soon, he was going to turn himself inside out.
Then he looked back at Braden who surveyed him with brooding intensity. Was it fair for him to ask his brother to watch over him and Katie when Braden so obviously wanted to make love to her too?
“Go, Ian,” Braden said quietly. “I’ll make sure Katie stays safe from you.”
* * *
Katie lay staring at the ceiling, wondering how much of her stupidity she could blame on the drugs. Or maybe she just needed to take more.
She’d invited him to come lie down with her. She nearly snorted. Who the fuck was she kidding? She’d invited him to screw her senseless. No wonder he’d looked at her so oddly. He was probably in the next room hoping to give her enough time to pass out.
Her gaze flickered lazily toward the door when she heard a sound. Warmth and longing flooded her when she saw Ian standing there, one arm propped on the doorframe as he watched her.
Her pulse quickened. Adrenaline shot up her spine and rebounded off the base of her skull.
Then he moved. He awkwardly shuffled forward, his feet making dragging sounds on the floor. As he’d done before, he settled on the edge of her bed at her hip. She held her breath, wondering what he’d say. What he’d do.
“I need to know how much of your invitation was the drugs and how much of it was you knowing what the hell you were saying.”
Her blood stirred and rushed just a little faster, heating her skin and bringing a flush to her cheeks. They stared at each other, not like two potential lovers, but two people who might just devour each other before the night was over.
“It’s been a long time for me,” she said evenly.
One part of her recognized that she was stalling, while the other part wondered why she was babbling like an idiot.
“Paulo was my last lover.”
“Was he any good?” Ian asked bluntly.
She turned her head and studied him. Such a strange conversation to be having.
“Yes, he was,” she said. “Very good. It was for that reason that I had such an easy time turning Ricardo down when he showed interest. I was young and starry-
eyed. The older brother would have been the better choice since I wanted security and family. I wasn’t the choosiest of women back then. I was more interested in the trappings than the actual man.”
“If that were true, you would have dropped Paulo with no compunction,” Ian pointed out.
She shrugged. “Paulo was actually very good to me in the beginning. I’m not defending him. He turned into quite the asshat, but for a while we were happy. For a while I actually hoped that I’d fit in. That I’d have the things I wanted.”
“And what do you want right now?” he asked, bringing them back to the two of them. In this room. Right now.
“I want you,” she said softly.
“Is that the drugs talking?”
She smiled. “I won’t lie and say I’m not a bit loopy. I won’t even lie and say that I might not regret it tomorrow. All I can tell you is that tonight, it’s what I want more than anything. Can you accept that?”
His breathing sped up, and his eyes glittered with lust. “Yeah, I can accept that. As long as you realize that tomorrow, when you may or may not regret it? Too damn bad. Because once won’t be enough.”
Her hand went automatically to her stomach and the thick bandage. Excitement rocketed through her body at his words. This was supposed to be on her terms. She called the shots. But she had the distinct feeling that once they made love, she was going to be giving a much larger piece of herself than she planned.
“I won’t hurt you, Katie,” he said softly.
His fingers curled around her wrist, and he moved her hand gently away from her wound. She watched with shocked arousal as he leaned down and pressed his lips to her belly. So soft, she nearly didn’t feel the slight brush of his mouth.
Carefully he pushed at her shirt until it rode high on her belly, baring the skin and the bandage to his gaze. And his lips.
She shivered when he kissed her navel then trailed his tongue around the indention. The stubble of his jaw scraped delicately against her skin. Then he slipped her shirt higher until it gathered at her neck.
Free of constraint, her nipples puckered and stood erect. He palmed one breast, molding it in his hand. His thumb rubbed across the tip and then back again. Her breath caught when he pinched it slightly between his fingers.
