“I don’t.” She wasn’t sure when that had happened or whether it was somewhere between the seventy-fourth and seventy-fifth agents’ rejections. Writing didn’t bring joy any longer and she wasn’t sure why.
“Oh. Well, then, that’s okay. You’ll just find something else.”
“But Gran, I studied journalism. I have my MFA in creative writing.” Everyone had expectations after that kind of commitment.
“Yes, that was expensive. I still remember your mother calling, begging me to get you to change your mind. ‘It doesn’t pay,’ she said. To which I responded, ‘Whatever happened to learning for the sake of learning?’ But of course, I had no idea how much an education was running a person these days. Another crime.”
“I paid for it all myself.” And still had the student debt to show for it.
“No matter what, dear, education is never a waste of money. And you have to be at least somewhat happy with what you’re choosing to do with your life.”
“I was working at Mom’s bridal shop mostly. Writing certainly wasn’t paying the bills and it probably never would have.” And Bradley had never thought it would. Much like her father.
“I always thought you were wasting your time there. You could always teach. It’s an honorable profession.”
Diana nodded. “I might do that.”
“You can do anything you want to! Remember that,” Gran said, making Diana feel twelve again.
Twelve, when everything in front of her was full of possibilities and opportunities. Before she’d experienced full blown rejection. Before her parents had divorced and summers with Gran became fewer and further between. Before both her father and Bradley had abandoned her.
And before she’d given up on Prince Charming and happily ever after.
Confession time. She cleared her throat. “Gran, I have to say something. I lied when I said I broke up with Bradley. He broke up with me.”
Gran gasped. “What? That time I met him he seemed perfectly sane.”
Diana strangled a laugh. “He is. We had a plan. Six years of a plan.”
“What happened?”
“He met Tiffany at Getting Hitched. She was one of the Bridezillas that shop for a dress before she has the groom. They met one day picking me up for lunch. Guess that’s all it took. Love at first sight or something.”
Gran shook her head. “Oh dear. No wonder you don’t want to step foot inside your Mom’s shop again. She has no class, that Tiffany, taking another woman’s man.”
“Don’t forget he had something to do with it. I thought he loved me but I think he was dedicated to me. We’d been together for so long we forgot why were together at all. But then Tiffany came along and he lost his head. Or his heart.”
“Did you love him?”
Why had no one ever asked her that question? Mom never had. “I thought I did. We had a plan.”
“Is that why you’re here? Are you running? Because that’s what your mother thinks.”
Running? She didn’t like the sound of that. Cowards ran from their troubles instead of facing them head-on. No, she wasn’t running. Starting over was different. She’d been stuck, working in Mom’s bridal shop because of family loyalty. Writing because it had always been part of the plan.
“I’d always remembered being happy here. Peaceful. I thought it might be a good place to think about my next steps. When I go back, I’ll tell Mom I can’t work there anymore. I just have to figure out what to do instead.”
Gran’s shaky hand cupped Diana’s chin. “You’re still working it all out, aren’t you?”
Diana’s throat felt tight and she held back a sob. “Still working it out.”
Gran pulled Diana into a hug. “Honey, you just take all the time you need.”
Chapter 13
On the second night in her apartment, Diana sat on the floor, a quart of Cherry Garcia her only company. Well, that and her phone. The cable guy was coming by tomorrow, so no WIFI or cable yet. Plenty of time to write, exactly what she needed. Too bad she couldn’t seem to get any words down. After an hour of effort, she’d given up and gone straight for the Ben & Jerry’s.
Earlier, she’d been to the consignment store in Napa and bought a secondhand couch the owner swore had been steamed cleaned between owners. The price was right, pulled out to a bed and included delivery. She’d save space this way and it made sense. But the stupid couch was funny looking. Lime green with a peacock pattern all over, like it should be owned by someone living in the mountains. As she stared at it now, Diana doubted she’d done the right thing. But the owner had sold her on the fact that when she was done using it she could always return it back to the shop and they’d be happy to sell it again.
Obviously, this was the better idea since she couldn’t stay. She’d agreed to come back after the summer to help in the bridal shop. Now she’d be going back to let Mom know that she wanted to quit the shop for good. She couldn’t face a boutique full of white dresses and all the happy and nauseating brides. Maybe she never wanted that back in her life again. All those hopes and expectations that couples put on each other. Too much.
It was okay to be alone. She wasn’t lonely, she told herself. Just feeling her way to Plan B. She sighed and scooped another spoonful of ice cream, letting it settle on her tongue and slowly melt away. Picked up her phone, stared at it and considered calling Scott. He’d already asked about the apartment number because he wanted to check and see whether there’d been any recent code violations. She’d rolled her eyes and given it to him.
But if she phoned him now, it might sound like a booty call. Which okay, maybe it was. Kind of. She would like to find out if their first time together had been a fluke. Whether all the planets had lined up in perfect formation on that Saturday and that’s why it had been so…crazy good.
There was a knock on the door and Diana peeked through the peephole. Scott. Her heart did that kick-start thing it always seemed to do around him. Calm down, she instructed her heart. It’s just a guy. Yes, but he’s so fine, her heart answered. And he shouldn’t be wasted on someone like you. Hey! Are you going to open the door or what? I’m on it. I got this. Opening the door now.
“Hey you,” Scott said. “All settled in?”
Good God, let him in, woman. Just look at him. What are you waiting for? We’d like some action tonight! How about it?
Diana’s heart slammed against her chest. “Would you just calm down?”
“What?” Scott grinned.
Yes, Einstein, you said that out loud.
“I mean, come in.” She moved aside and waved him in. Hopefully Stupid Heart would be happy now. He was inside. The rest would be up to him.
“Everything okay?” He slid her a look that said he doubted it.
“Great! Got a new couch today.” She pointed towards the joke of a couch. It actually reminded her a little of the costume the Riddler wore in Batman.
Scott frowned. “I would have helped you move it.”
“I know that. But it was free delivery.” Obviously, Scott was here to help. What else?
And far be it for me to say, but he could help us to another orgasm you know.
Shut. Up.
Sure enough, he seemed to be casually inspecting the place, scowling at the fan hanging precariously from the ceiling. “No recent code violations. I checked.”
“Whew.” Diana made a big show of wiping her brow.
He went to the door and jiggled the knob. “But I don’t like this lock. You need a deadbolt.”
“It’s fine. I have nothing much to steal anyway.”
“You sign a lease?”
“Month to month. I just need to give notice.” This was what he really wanted to know, she imagined. “Tell you what. You can help me move my twin bed out of Gran’s bedroom. I kind of told her I’d use it, but I’m pretty sure a little girl might need the bed instead. I was thinking about the Boccardo Living Center in town.”
“Good idea.”
“Oh, I’m so
rry. Do you want something to drink? Or some ice cream?” Which she’d left on the floor. Lovely. She picked it up on the way to the refrigerator. “I have water and water. Milk and water. I’m trying to lose weight, you know.”
Hence the ice cream which we both know is clogging me up as you speak.
“I know the ice cream is misleading, but I gave myself a treat today. Because of all the running.”
“Diana.”
She jumped, because he’d come up right behind her. “Yes!” When she turned, she was face to face with the man in all his glorious hotness.
“Why are you so nervous?” He tugged on a lock of her hair.
“Um, because you and I…we…” Had incredible, wonderful, glorious sex and she’d told him it was only going to be once. Since he listened so incredibly well, it was going to be up to her to change that. Guts, and her lack of them, were going to weigh heavily against her.
“Made love?”
She blew out a breath. “Yes.”
“Once.”
She closed the refrigerator door. “Uh-huh. That’s what I said.”
“And I heard you loud and clear. I didn’t come here for that.”
Well, you’ve done it this time. Thanks a lot!
“Sure, but here’s the thing.” She took a big breath and found her balls. “I was just thinking about this today. Is it really such a horrible idea?”
“Is what a horrible idea?”
Oh right, he couldn’t read her mind. “I mean you and me. One more time.” She inspected the pattern of her kitchen floor. Very cheap linoleum, a real shame because there were probably original hardwood floors underneath should anyone care to take time to discover them.
She felt Scott’s hand tip her chin up, and his eyes met hers. “Is that what you want?”
“Sure. Yeah, okay.”
He chuckled. “I like it when you tell me what you want. In great detail.”
“So… I was thinking one more time.”
He pressed her up against the refrigerator door, one arm on either side pinning her in. “I’m waiting for detail.”
“You and me. Together. Naked. This time on a bed.”
“We’re going to have to work on that detail.”
“What else do you want me to say? I mean, okay, I can’t stop thinking about you, yada yada yada.” Oh God, and she was a writer? Not anymore apparently.
“That might worry me if I wasn’t having the same problem.” He grinned. “But what I meant is, talk dirty to me.”
Good going! Maybe we should have listened to Mandy.
She buried her face in her hands. “Oh Scott, I’m really, really, really not any good at that. Trust me.”
He brought her hands down. “That’s okay, I’ll teach you.”
“Really?”
He nodded. “One more time, huh? What about me?”
“Yes, you would be there too.”
He smiled and his thumb circled her lips. “I think I should get some input.”
“Absolutely.”
“We should re-open these negotiations. I’m thinking two more times and when I say two, I don’t mean on the same day. That wouldn’t count. The more I think about it, the more I want a clause in which I get to re-negotiate terms.”
Good Lord. The man was gorgeous, sexy and smart. “Okay, wow. I’m…speechless.”
We hit the jackpot! Woohoo!
Calm down, she reminded Heart. This is temporary.
“Also, I get to give the orders from now on.” Scott moved her away from the refrigerator and in one swift move lifted her up on the small kitchen counter. He stepped between her legs. “Take off your shirt.”
She did, grateful she wore her frilly plunging baby blue demi bra. “Done. Next order?”
Scott’s searing hot eyes assessed her breasts but he didn’t touch, just kept his arms firmly on either side of her. “Take off your pants.”
In the kitchen? Is this sanitary?
Oh the hell with it. This was harder to do and he helped as she leaned back and wiggled out of her jeans and panties. She smiled at him, more than a little vulnerable half naked on a kitchen counter top with a whole lot of hotness between her legs.
“What now?” she asked.
He dipped his head between her thighs. “Try not to move.”
***
Sex, as it turned out, had been great for Diana’s word count. She finished the article before the deadline. Another first. Unfortunately she was now twice over on her word count, but this was the easy part. Now she could cut and rearrange to her heart’s delight. She no longer felt like a stopped up sink. Far from plugged, she’d pretty much sprung a word leak. Words were spilling out of her as fast as the water had sprayed in Gran’s kitchen.
She’d been prepared to feel the guilt hit her but it never had. Even when she’d waited for the guilt to arrive in a special delivery. Not happening. But Diana told herself it wasn’t just him who had unplugged her, uh, sink, but the talk with Gran. Finally Diana had admitted the truth out loud to Gran.
And it was okay. She wasn’t a loser because Bradley had dumped her. Or because she’d never managed to write anything publishable. No matter what she decided to do, it would work itself out. She’d manage somehow. Move forward and find a new passion or find a way to fall in love again with the old one. And she had one more goal. Before the end of summer, one by one, she’d convince the folks in Starlight Hill that she was no husband-stealing hussy. That she didn’t want the attention from the Internet video. A job in town and being part of the community would go a long way, not to mention that her savings wouldn’t last the rest of the summer. But still no luck finding work since now the shampoo girl job was also gone.
Late Wednesday morning, she walked to Gen’s bakery to surprise Gran with a special delivery of some of her favorites. As she rounded the corner to the bakery a man was placing a sign in the window that made Diana stop in her tracks. The sign read ‘Help Wanted: part-time’, but although he looked like he was about to tape it up, he turned, taking the sign with him. Genevieve tugged on him and she seemed animated, talking or possibly arguing with the man. The man then shook his head and picked her up in his arms giving her such a heartfelt and intimate kiss that Diana had to turn away.
When she looked back a moment later the sign was in place. She ran inside before Gen changed her mind again. The doorbell dinged and both Gen and the man, someone tall and nearly as good looking as Scott, turned toward her.
“Morning!” Gen said.
“You here about the job?” the man asked.
“Wallace!” Gen said. “This is Diana. She’s one of my best customers.”
Wallace nodded. “Nice to meet you. Well, if you know anyone—”
“Actually, Gen, you do know that I’m looking for work?” Diana said. “There isn’t much in town.”
“This is only temporary. I’m actually not even sure I need anyone, but—”
“Except that you do.” Wallace leaned back, his arms folded across his broad chest.
“All right, I do.” Gen smiled at him. “I need to cut back on my hours. Sophia used to help me from time to time for the early shift and I have a girl that fills in occasionally. But Sophia can’t do the early shifts anymore. And then there’s Mrs. Lewis who used to own the bakery before I bought it, but she can only fill in occasionally because she can’t stand on her feet too long. The doctor told her—”
“Babe,” Wallace interrupted her. “She doesn’t need your entire life’s story.”
“Oh, right.”
“I’ll get you an application.” Wallace went to the back.
“How early?” Diana asked.
“Oh, the shift? I’m usually here at four in the morning.”
“Oh my God!”
“What?” Genevieve turned and looked behind her. “What’s wrong?”
“You said four a.m!”
“Is that too early for you?”
“Absolutely not,” Diana lied. “It’s just that I
was thinking about how long it’s been since I had an opportunity to get up early enough to see the sun rise.”
“It’s a great feeling to be up that early. It feels like you’re the only person on earth for a little sacred time. I used to love it, but like I said, I’m not getting to bed early enough. And I’m so tired lately.” She whispered across the counter. “Actually, this is Wallace’s idea.”
“I kind of figured. This job would really help me, too. Not just the money but a chance to meet everyone in town. They all seem to congregate here. I need them all to see I’m not a husband-stealing type.”
“We all know that, sugar. You’re Mrs. Paulsen’s granddaughter.”
Yeah, and she couldn’t coast on that alone. Diana accepted the application from Wallace when he came back. He positioned himself just behind Genevieve, wrapped his arms around her waist and pulled her toward him in a move that was both possessive and tender at the same time.
Damn those two were cute together. Diana sat at one of the tables and filled out the application quickly, hesitating only a moment in putting Scott down as a reference. Gen already knew Diana from her association with Gran. This was the way of a small town. People. Community. The bakery happened to be a hub here and everyone loved Genevieve. Some of that love would brush off on Diana and before long everyone would forget about the viral video and her stellar entrance into town.
They’d see her as Diana, Betty Paulsen’s devoted granddaughter. Gen’s loyal bakery employee. Scott’s—friend?
Of course they were friends. No one made her feel the way Scott did. Beautiful. Special. Wanted. But they’d recently stretched the boundaries of the definition of friendship. She assumed friends-with-benefits would be a better definition but not surprisingly, she didn’t want to put a qualification on the two of them. They were going to have a good time. Fun. Keep it light. Considering she’d never done anything like it, she was way out of her comfort zone.
The doorbell jangled again and Diana looked up to see Wallace leaving. Finished with the application, she handed it back to Gen who gave her a lightning speed interview, then took her back to show her the ovens and the recipes she’d have to get to know backwards and forwards.
Unforgettable You (Starlight Hill Series Book 4) Page 15
