“Alice?”
“I...” My voice comes out a whisper, but I force it louder. “I can’t marry you, Percy.”
He smiles like he thinks I’m performing a bit. “Okay, Alice—”
“No, Percy, I—” I turn my face to the floor. “I’m serious.”
He crosses his arms over his chest. He sees my eyes and he knows I’m not playing. “What’s going on?” he asks slowly. “What happened to you?”
I try to think of ways to float around the truth. There has to be different words or phrases to say that he can easily connect the dots with, but I owe him more than that. “I slept with Charles tonight, Percy,” I say.
He furrows his brow. “Char— Charles?” he asks. “Your mother’s boyfriend, Charles?” He says it out of the corner of his mouth as if it’s too incredible to be true.
I shake my head. “He’s not… He was just pretending to be to get to me.”
“I don’t follow, Alice. What’s—”
“He and I have history, Percy,” I say. “He—” I swallow to halt the lump growing in my throat. “Do you remember how I told you before that I had an affair with an older man?”
“Yeah,” he answers with a nod. Then slowly, he realizes, “that was him?”
“Yes.” I watch his face as he tries to work it out inside.
“Why would he go after your mom?”
“I told you,” I say, “to get to me. And it worked.”
“Alice,” Percy reaches across the table for my hands, but I pull away at the last moment.
“Percy, please, just let me say this and then you can decide if you want to touch me ever again,” I say. He falls silent in his chair. “He was… my first everything.” I relive every memory with Charles in my head. “I’ve never really gotten over it. He’s inside of me… all the time. Every day. Every… every time I’m with you, he’s there.”
Percy flexes his jaw and for the first time in our relationship, I see anger in his eyes. “Do you love him?” he asks.
“No,” I say. “I don’t think I ever did. He just… made me feel desired.”
“I don’t make you feel desired?”
“You do, Percy. This isn’t a case of he does and you don’t. It’s just a different kind, that’s all.” He looks away from me. “You’ve done nothing wrong,” I tell him, “but I can’t marry you. Not after what I’ve done.” I look at the table, suddenly noticing all of the little imperfection etched into the wood. I try to imagine what caused them. Maybe I dropped a fork off a plate or scribbled too hard on a piece of paper.
“Alice…” he whispers. “I love you.”
I shake my head. “I love you more than anything in this life, Percy, but… I can’t say no to him. I could have stopped him today, but I didn’t. I wanted it. I wanted it so badly.” I drop my eyes. “I’m sorry. If everything else falls apart, then love doesn’t matter.” I close my mouth, ashamed that Charles’ words turned out to be true.
“Nothing has fallen apart, Alice,” he says.
I glance up at him and see that his anger is gone. “Percy…”
“No. Alice,” he leans forward, “we can fix this.”
“You don’t understand,” I say. “He’s a very powerful man, Percy. He’s threatened you and… I can’t let him take you down. I won’t let him.”
“No.”
“Percy—”
He reaches out quickly and grips my hands. “See? Alice. I’m still here. I’m hurting like hell, but I’m still here. I’m not going anywhere,” he says. “I can build a good life for us.”
“No, you can’t…”
“Yes, I can.”
“He bought your portraits, Percy. It was him.” My stomach turns as I think about them hanging on the walls of Charles’ room. “He knew it was me. He says you’ll never sell another one ever again and I know he has the means to make it happen.”
“It’s all bullshit, Alice. He can’t do that.”
I tremble at his touch. “This is the only way, Percy. I’m sorry.”
“Alice…” His eyes turn serious, more serious than I’ve ever seen him. “If you want to leave because you sincerely don’t want me, then I will look away, no questions asked. It’ll break my heart, but I’ll get it. I can understand that.” He squeezes my hands. “But if you’re doing this because he’s coerced you into it, then I’ll be the first one out the door.”
“Percy—” I try to pull away, but he keeps his grip on me.
“You’re not a coward, Alice. Me — maybe. But not you. I have never seen you run from anything, ever. It baffles me that you would start now — with something that really matters.” He shakes his head. “And I’m not egotistical enough to believe that I’m all you’ll ever want or need in a man, but I planned on working on that every day for the rest of your life.” He releases my hands and sits back in his chair. “Or maybe it’s hopeless to even try… and it just wasn’t meant to be in the first place.”
His words cut me deep. My vision blurs as I watch him stand up from the table.
Maybe it wasn’t meant to be, I think. Maybe fate already rolled its dice for me and set me on Charles’ path forever.
Fate. One of the only things Charles believes in. He claims it brought us together on the night of the Blind Girl Party five years ago. It marked me as his once.
Will it mark me again?
Chapter 13
Let Fate Decide
“Alice, you look wonderful.”
I smile at Ian Botsford for the first time in ages. “Ian—” He opens his arms to me and I return his friendly hug. “How are you?”
“Well, I was having a dreadful day until I received your call,” he jokes as he pulls out of our embrace. “Now, what brings you back to my hotel?”
I clear my throat, my eyes glancing around the busy golden lobby for prying ears. “Would it be too much to ask you a favor?” I ask.
Ian grins from ear-to-ear. “Alice, Alice — No man can ever refuse a request on Blind Girl Party night!”
I laugh. “Yeah, it actually has to do with that.”
He nods and lowers his voice. “All right,” he says. He points to the black double doors at the other side of the lobby. “Come on, let’s chat.”
We walk together across the lobby and I quietly explain my visit. He nods softly through the whole thing until we’re through the double doors.
“They just finished setting up now,” Ian tells me.
A wave of gut-wrenching nostalgia thrills me as I walk through the black curtains. Twelve cages line the walls, set up exactly as they were five years ago, empty and waiting for twelve young ladies to fill them. A single beam of light above each cage illuminates the dark room. “Wow…” I breathe.
“Guests don’t start showing up until after nine, usually,” Ian says.
“I won’t need that long,” I say. “Thank you for letting me in.”
“It’s my pleasure,” he says as he glances around the room. He takes a deep breath, filling his lungs to the very top. “This is my favorite night of the year.”
“I can’t believe Gabby still lets you get away with this,” I say, shaking my head.
“Hey— this night changed her life, too. She knows how important it can be.”
“Yeah,” I give a light smile. “I know what you mean.”
“Plus, we have a nice looky-no-touchy policy in our marriage.” He shrugs. “We trust each other.”
I feel a twinge of jealousy for my old friend. “Fate was really kind to you two that night,” I tell him.
Ian takes a deep breath and regards me with understanding. “And if I were to wager a guess…” he pauses without finishing the thought. I nod. “Fate makes mistakes, too, Alice,” he tells me.
I look around the dark room. “Yeah,” I say. “I’m counting on it.” I step closer to the first cage. “Show me how to open it.”
***
I hear the double doors open and the hairs on the back of my neck stand tall. His footsteps draw c
loser and I know it’s him in the darkness.
“I’m curious, Alice…” he muses. “Do you still find it degrading?”
“Hello, Charles,” I say.
His chuckle chills my skin. “Oh, seeing you like this, Alice… It brings back such fond memories.”
“I’m happy you find my sacrifice amusing,” I talk through my teeth.
“What is the point of this?” he asks. “What are you hoping to achieve?”
I don’t answer as my ears perk up to the sound of the door again.
“Alice?!”
He rushes towards us with quick feet. His hands slam into the cage. “Percy, it’s okay.” I try to soothe him, but his anger rings in my ears.
“Where are your clothes?” he asks me. “Why are you blindfolded?”
“Calm down, boy,” Charles laughs. “It’s tradition. Sit back and enjoy it. She certainly is.”
I feel his fingers graze my thigh. “That’s enough, Charles,” I warn, jerking out of his reach. “I want a new deal.”
“What’s going on, Alice?” Percy’s voice sounds so lost, so full of pain. I want nothing more than to reach out to him and comfort him, but I fight to remain neutral.
“As per the rules of the Blind Girl Party,” I begin with shaking voice, “if you would like to take me home, write your name on a piece of paper and put it in the fishbowl. I will reach in and select a name. We’ll let fate decide this.”
“Alice—” Charles attempts to interrupt me, but I speak over him.
“The name I choose is final,” I say. “I will go with him, and we’ll be left alone. No silent influence over anyone’s career. No plans of retribution. Do you both accept the terms?”
“This is absurd, Alice,” Charles says. “You and I have been through fate’s dance already before.”
“No,” I say. “Not like this. You chose me that night, Charles. Fate did not.”
“I beg to differ, darling.”
“If you believe fate has already matched us, then what are you afraid of?” I ask him. “If it’s meant to be, then it’s meant to be.”
He sighs. “All right, Alice.” I hear him pop the cap off his pen. “I’ll play your little game.”
“Percy…” I tilt into the direction of his voice.
“Alice, let’s just go home. You don’t have to do this.”
“If we do that, we won’t last—”
“Yes, we will!” Percy fights. “He can’t touch us, Alice.”
“Oh, I can.” Charles’ voice reveals his grin. “And I will.”
“Percy, please,” I urge him. “This is the only way he’ll leave us alone. He’s agreed to it — and I want you to agree to it, too.”
I listen to his hesitation. Finally, a slip of paper crinkles in his hand.
“Okay,” he says.
A tremor shakes my body.
“There’s one guiding light, Alice — and only one — that you can put your complete trust in.”
I remember Charles’ words so clearly. He asked me to trust him and I did so without a second thought. His hold on me was as strong then as it is now. Even as I reach my arm through the bars, my desires pull me in opposite directions.
The glass fishbowl is cold to the touch. My fingers tremble against it. I take a long breath to steady myself, but it helps nothing.
My nails reach the bottom of the bowl and I feel the two slips of paper, folded up multiple times. I touch one, then the other, swishing back and forth, delaying the inevitable moment when I’ll have to submit and let fate decide my future.
I pinch one and pull my hand out of the bowl.
“It’s Blind Girl night,” he told me then. “Tonight is fate’s night.”
I push a finger beneath the deep red blindfold and pull it off my head. Charles and Percy stand on either side of the cage. I look at each of them one-by-one, taking note of everything I love about them. The good and the bad. The blessings and the curses.
Percy’s eyes shake in their sockets, full of fear and dread, his hands gripping the steel bars between us, but Charles stands tall, calm and steady, with his hands in his pockets.
I unfold the paper with heavy fingers and let the name echo in my head.
Percy.
When I imagined this plan, this was the moment of darkness. The moment I could not prepare for. The one I both dreaded and anticipated with every fiber of my being. Now that it’s here, and I feel the entire weight of it, I can do nothing but sit here, under the blinding light above, frozen still in my cage.
I show them the paper.
Percy exhales a heavy sigh of relief. His forehead shows a thin layer of sweat and I can see clear tears in his eyes.
Charles doesn’t move and gives no reaction to the moment. I see him glance down once at the paper and the end of his lips curl on one side. Then he looks at me with his steady, green eyes and says, “Congratulations, young man.”
He turns away.
“Charles…” I whisper.
“The night is young, Alice,” he says through his smile. “I have a party to get ready for.”
I watch him walk away and my heart breaks one last time for Charles Kent.
Epilogue
Goodbye
“It’s almost time,” Gabby says in the doorway. “Are you ready?”
I stare at myself in the mirror. It’s here. The day I’ve been counting down to for months.
My wedding day.
The dress is perfect. Gabby spent hours styling my hair and make-up. I feel amazing. I’m overflowing with happiness. But—
“Not yet,” I whisper. I scan myself in the mirror, looking from all possible angles, trying to find out what’s wrong.
“Okay,” she says.
“Gabby…”
“Yeah?”
“I need a few minutes,” I say.
She nods in understanding and grabs the door knob. “Sure,” she says. “I’ll stall for as long as I can.”
“Thank you.” I take a seat at the vanity and let my arms fall to my sides.
She leaves me alone to stare at myself a little longer.
Then, the door opens.
I watch his reflection in the mirror as he steps in and closes the door behind him. A smile climbs to my face.
“Hello, Charles.” I turn around and stand up to face him.
“Maybe I was wrong about you, Alice,” he says as his eyes glance down my dress. “You are quite stunning in white.”
“Better than blue?” I ask.
He doesn’t answer. I watch him wade across the room. He stuffs his hands into the pockets of his suit and looks out the window at the street below.
There’s been a question on my lips since the last time I saw him. It stirs on my tongue now with an eager flavor. If I don’t ask him now, I’ll never get a second chance. “Do you regret it?” I ask.
His eyes stay on the window. “I don’t believe in regret, Alice,” he says. “We’re all players of fate’s game. We roll the dice and we move on.”
“Unless you rig the game,” I say.
He turns towards me. “Alice…”
“Why did you put Percy’s name in, Charles?”
He doesn’t hesitate. “Because it’s what you wanted.”
“But…” I fumble my words. “I pulled your slip out of that bowl, not Percy’s.”
He smirks. “I’m impressed you remember my handwriting, darling.”
“Fate spoke for you…” I take a breath. “You would have gotten everything you wanted.”
“No, I wouldn’t have.” He steps away from the window. “I wanted to bring you happiness, Alice. I’ve said so since the beginning.”
I pause and lick my lips as tears tease my eyes. “Charles,” I breathe, “do you think you could have ever loved me?”
“No.” He stands above me. “Not the way you deserve.”
“You loved once,” I point out.
“I did,” he admits. “Once.”
I nod, understanding his meanin
g. “I won’t take it personal,” I say.
“And you shouldn’t,” he says. “No, Alice… I think I would have loved you deeply if I were capable of it.”
I shake my head once. “You’re lying,” I say.
He looks at me with a twinkle behind his eye. “I can be a real bastard, Alice, but I am not without empathy.” I swallow the tears down and smile at him. He floats a hand up to my face and it hovers just over my skin. “My only hope is that he makes you happy.” He pauses and his eyes wander my face. “And my only regret, if I were to have one, is that I couldn’t do it myself.”
I close my eyes and feel his kiss against my cheek.
“Goodbye, Alice,” he whispers. He drops his hand and passes by me towards the door.
“Goodbye, Charles.”
He nods to me once before closing the door behind him.
A few silent seconds tick by. I take a deep breath and it passes smoothly through my body. As I exhale, everything stands still for one blissful moment in time.
The door opens again and closes just as quickly. I turn to see Gabby standing there with our bouquets in her hands.
“So…” she says. “Do you want to talk about that?”
I shrug a shoulder. “No,” I answer with a small smile.
“Okay…” She looks me up and down. “Are you ready now?”
“Yes.” I say it without hesitation. “I’m ready.”
***
Whispers From Tabatha
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Blind Girl: A Dark Billionaire Romance Page 16
