The dreams she used to have had been a lot different. Those dreams had centered around being anywhere else, as long as she was far away from her mother.
She’d become too used to living one day at a time, too comfortable. Over the years it had been so much a part of who she was, who she’d been. Even being here, in this pleasant little New Hampshire town, felt like she was trying to fit herself into another body, another mind. Square peg, round hole. Slowly, those edges had begun to wear so they weren’t so sharp and angular.
Maybe someday I’ll fit.
And that’s why she’d felt like crying, because no one on this earth, until Sadie came along, had been interested in wanting her to fit. She loved the woman more than she had ever allowed herself to love anyone. Even her brother, Storm, whom she’d lost long ago.
Thinking of him hurt so much. Rio curled into a tight ball and wrapped her arms around her body. If only she had taken him with her. If only they’d left before that horrible night.
No, I refuse to think about it. She shoved him forcefully from her thoughts because if she didn’t she’d be a wreck over something she couldn’t control.
She could almost feel Travis’s hand on her shoulder again. Why had it sent flames through her?
That kind of attraction was not something she wanted.
For the next week, Rio did everything she could to avoid Travis’s company. She thought over and over about how his ex-mother-in-law had reacted to finding her there. The last thing she wanted to do was to make trouble for him. She left for work before he woke in the morning and made an effort to stay late and have dinner with Sadie.
Now that tensions were easing a bit and Travis trusted her more, she considered breaching the subject of moving in with Sadie instead of staying with him.
Living at Cobble Creek would be so much more convenient, easier on everyone. She couldn’t imagine Travis wanted her under his roof forever. Still, he hadn’t made any moves for her to leave yet, hadn’t been bugging her about finding a place of her own.
She knew he had a lot on his mind too. Even if Jessa had been behaving herself, she still hadn’t said more than ten words to her father and avoided him whenever possible. Jessa, however, had finally began to bond with her.
Maybe the girl felt they had suffered similar parental problems. Sisters in teenage angst. Surely Jessa had no clue about Rio’s past. She didn’t think Travis would fill the girl in.
Twice that week Sadie had suggested Jessa show Rio some of the local trails. The second time, they saddled up Fleur and Barnaby and headed out for some girl time.
“Well, isn’t this better than being cooped up in school?” Rio commented when they reined the horses down a dirt road.
Jessa shrugged. “At least I have a social life at school. Better than cleaning stalls and doing homework.”
“Could be worse. We’re out here, aren’t we?” Rio inhaled deeply. She absolutely loved the scent of the woods in autumn.
“Dad is going hunting this weekend. I have to stay at my aunt’s house. Banished again. Why can’t he trust me and let me stay home?”
Interesting. Travis hadn’t mentioned anything about hunting. Then again she hadn’t exactly made herself available for conversation lately.
“Because he cares about you, Jessa.”
Jessa made a snorting sound. “Sure has a funny way of showing it. I’ve done exactly what he wants for the last three weeks and I’m still grounded forever.”
No, she refused to stick her nose in and tell Jessa her opinion. She didn’t want to alienate the girl, which would happen if she opened her mouth.
“Your aunt might have something fun planned for you.”
“Yeah, so Dad and his friend, Lenny, can go beat their chests and shoot at things.”
Despite the sour tone in Jessa’s voice, Rio laughed at the image the words invoked. Travis wouldn’t do anything of the sort. She believed he would be a careful hunter, not one of those yahoos who headed out into the woods for the beer and guy talk and not the hunting. The image in her brain was funny nonetheless.
“And he’s letting you stay by yourself. Why can’t you and I stay together?”
Rio hadn’t considered that. Would he really expect her to stay by herself? Did he trust her enough to leave her alone? “He probably thinks I’ll stay with Sadie.”
“Hasn’t said.”
“I’m sure he will.” If I make myself available to him.
After work she made an effort to be around, arriving at Shadow Oak before dinner. On the day shift again, Travis had already returned home by the time she came in. He was making dinner while Jessa did her homework at the computer in the living room. Rio slipped by him with a quick hello and went to clean up and change. When she finished, she silently set the table.
She didn’t want to outright ask him about the hunting trip or her accommodations, but didn’t want to assume anything either.
Doubtful Jessa wouldn’t say anything, too determined to give her father the silent treatment, no matter what. So Rio had to wait through a wordless dinner until Jessa left. Rio picked up her plate and Jessa’s and carried them to the kitchen.
“I’ll be hunting this weekend with a buddy of mine. Down to the cabin. We’ll spend the night,” Travis finally announced as he came into the kitchen, carrying his own plate and glass.
“Oh, okay.” Rio tried to sound nonchalant, as if she hadn’t heard about the plans before.
“Jessa will stay at my sister’s house.”
“I suppose I can stay with Sadie.” She might as well suggest it herself. Might make things easier.
“No need. Really.”
Rio put the last dish away and glanced at him. She hadn’t allowed herself to really study him closely.
He was handsome, disturbingly so. Not in a flashy, Hollywood, dashing sort of way. No, instead he appeared approachable, friendly. He kept his brown hair short and there was a definite wave to it. He had a high forehead, steady blue eyes, a straight, narrow nose and a mouth that . . .
No, she didn’t want to think about his mouth. In fact, by studying his face she remembered her body’s reaction to his touch the other night.
Stupid. So stupid to even feel this way. But she couldn’t help it.
Over the years, when she wandered from place to place, she made it her most important rule not to become involved with anyone. On the rare occasion she broke her cardinal rule, it had never been for a guy like Travis. It was always for some biker dude in a leather jacket, and she always ended it before it could go further than a kiss or two.
Now, standing in the kitchen with Travis, she realized why she gave those kinds of guys her attention. They were safe. She’d never go further than a kiss with them because they didn’t attract her. They wouldn’t hold her in one place for long. She never regretted leaving. She refused to look back.
Not like this cop, this good guy who opened up his home to her. Maybe he only did that because he didn’t trust her around his aunt. Yet he trusted her enough to invite her into his home. He had made her a part of their lives.
“Are you sure? I don’t want any problems.” Meaning Daphne Montague. She didn’t say it aloud.
He seemed to know what she meant. “Don’t worry about my ex-mother-in-law. I can deal with anything coming from her.”
Rio formed a frown. The time had come to bring up a move. She drew in her breath. What the heck. The worst he could say was no.
“I was wondering,” she began slowly, keeping her gaze fixed on him. He leaned against the counter and studied her. “Maybe I can move over to Sadie’s. Permanently. She’s mentioned it a few times. It would be easier on everyone.”
Travis didn’t speak, just continued to stare. His jaw tensed.
“I’m sure you’d like your privacy, and
surely you can trust me, Travis.”
“Don’t think I’m ready yet,” he finally replied, not taking his gaze off her. “I know both you and Sadie would like that . . .” He paused and finally looked away. “I’d rather you stay here, at least until the snow starts to fly. Then we’ll revisit it.”
Rio tightened her fists. She wanted to argue with him, tell him to stop being so pigheaded. Ask him why he could trust her here alone but not trust her to stay with Sadie.
Instead she pressed her lips together and nodded curtly. “Fine.”
Wordlessly, she stalked past him and escaped to her room, shutting the door a little too loudly behind her.
Rio lay in bed, staring at the ceiling. The sound of rain pelting the side of the house filled the air in a monotonous flow.
She couldn’t sleep. It wasn’t the noise of the storm outside. She didn’t care for the fact that except for her, the house was empty for the second night.
She wished Jessa and Travis were home. She didn’t have to see them. To know they were somewhere inside the same walls would calm her nerves. Instead, Jessa had been banished to her aunt’s house and Travis was down at his cabin, bonding with his buddy.
God, she wished she could’ve stayed with Sadie.
And since when have you been afraid to be alone? Rio closed her eyes and willed herself to ignore the clamor around her, told her brain to shut up so she could go back to sleep. Last time she glanced at it, the clock read a few minutes past two.
As sleep began to pull her down, she heard a noise from inside the house this time. She sat up in bed, now wide-awake. The noise repeated, coming from out in the kitchen.
Rio sat still for a long time, listening. Her bedroom door was shut so the sounds were muffled, but constant.
Slowly she climbed out of bed, padded to the door, opening it a crack, enough to peek out. She couldn’t see the entire kitchen from her vantage point, so she stepped out, creeping further down the narrow hall, with only her fists to defend herself.
The sight of Travis standing by the sink surprised her, followed by a flood of relief. So the rain had apparently driven him in and cut his hunting trip short.
Beyond the comfort of having someone home at last, a not-so-new emotion wound its way in. Thick, undeniable attraction came on much stronger, much headier than before.
The fact he stood there bare-chested, in the soft illumination of the light over the stove, did nothing for her resolve to keep those damned lustful thoughts at bay.
I should turn around. Slip into her bedroom, climb into bed and be glad she wasn’t alone. That was what she should do. Instead she couldn’t tear her gaze away from him.
So much about him remained unknown. He’d spent years in the service and she could see it in his build. His tanned skin stretched taut over the muscles of his chest, his abdomen tight.
Rio flexed her fingers and balled them up. The desire to go to him and stroke her hand up the smooth, hard expanse of his back overwhelmed her. She’d struggled with this misplaced attraction for too long, and seeing him this way only made the battle harder to fight.
Damn. Why couldn’t she leave? Go to bed? Why did she have to be so transfixed by him? Just a second longer, one more glimpse. Then she’d have enough to dream about for a good long while.
Finally, she found the will to leave, but she didn’t even take one step before his voice stopped her.
“Rio.”
Too late to escape.
His soft voice startled her. She faced him once again. Instead of sinking into the shadows, which she wanted, she stepped out into the kitchen.
“Hi,” she greeted and wanted to kick herself for how her voice sounded so breathless. “I didn’t mean to disturb you.”
A smile drew across his face, which weakened her knees even more. The sculpted muscles, the handsome face, his warm smile welcomed her. It all beat against the wall she kept erected around her heart.
“No, I should apologize for waking you. I thought I could be quiet.”
“It’s okay. What are you doing here? I wasn’t expecting you until tomorrow.”
“My buddy got an emergency phone call and had to head home. I decided to head back too. Supposed to rain like this all the way through tomorrow. Not ideal hunting conditions.”
“I suppose not.”
“You been okay?” His brows rose as he studied her.
Rio shrugged. “I’ve kept myself busy over at Sadie’s. She’s been making sure I’ve had enough to eat. It’s strange, rattling around this big place alone. Um, not that I’ve been doing much rattling.” God, she hoped he didn’t think she’d been snooping around.
“I love it. After a year of being constantly surrounded by a bunch of people, I can’t think of anything better than a quiet house.”
Rio stepped backward. “Oh, well, then I’ll leave you alone.”
Close enough to be able to take hold of her arm, Travis reached for her. This time she didn’t stiffen or shrink away. The feel of his fingers on her flesh sent a million sparks shooting from the point of contact straight through her body.
“No, don’t go. I don’t mind.” His own voice was strangely husky. He didn’t release his hold immediately. “I was about to make a plate of nachos. You want to share?”
Say no. Say goodnight and go to bed.
Instead she heard herself say, “Yes.”
Travis didn’t want to let go of Rio’s arm. Her bare skin was so warm and smooth. She must’ve taken a shower before bed because he could smell her fragrant shampoo.
What a difference a month or so had made in her. He recalled the first time he’d seen her in her old, ragged clothes, appearing as if she hadn’t had a hot shower in weeks. Which was probably the truth.
Now she wore new pajamas and a pair of fuzzy slippers and seemed almost settled. Except for the way her pale green eyes widened when he touched her. Did she sense it too? That zooming of adrenaline rushing through his body by the mere feel of her skin under the palm of his hand? She must have, because she seemed to be on the brink of flight.
What a way to live. He released her. He’d been feeling the pull toward her for a while now, had always passed it off as typical attraction. She was a pretty young woman and he hadn’t been with anyone for a very long time. Nature had a funny way of throwing two people who were totally wrong for each other into situations like this.
For everyone’s sake it was best to shake it off. It wouldn’t be a smart idea to start down this path.
But her mouth . . . She had the most kissable, full lips he’d ever seen. Either smiling or frowning, they were too enticing for his own good. Staring into her eyes didn’t help much either. Such a contrast, the pale green and the creamy fair skin compared with her thick black hair. And those coral lips. So much femininity and strength packed into one petite body.
To clear out these trainwreck thoughts, Travis spun from her and grabbed the bag of tortilla chips and a plate. Quickly, he piled cheese on top of the nachos and slid it into the microwave, then fished the salsa and sour cream from the fridge. Rio sat at the table by the window and stared out into the darkness beyond.
“Here we go. Drink?”
“Water, thanks.”
A strange situation to say the least, Travis thought, as they sat at the kitchen table, almost two-thirty in the morning, eating nachos while a storm beat against the walls around them.
“Why Rio?” he asked, breaking the silence between them.
She glanced up at him and raised her slim brows. “What do you mean?”
“Why did your mom name you Rio? What’s the significance?”
She chuckled. “Nothing really romantic, I’m afraid. It’s from a song by Duran Duran. You know it, I’m sure.” Rio sang a line, then grinned self-consciously. “It was her favori
te song in the world, apparently. I thank God she didn’t like ‘Hungry Like the Wolf’ better. Who knows what she would’ve come up with.”
Travis laughed. “Okay, what about your siblings? Diamond and Storm?”
“I have no idea where she came up with Diamond. I never asked. I do remember Storm, though. I was only five when he was born. God, what a night. It was kind of like tonight, only louder.” Rio glanced toward the window, then down to her hands as if she didn’t want to meet his gaze.
“We were living in an old trailer,” she continued, her gaze still downcast. “I was sure we’d get picked up and tossed by the wind. The rain and gusts beat the hell out of that damned tin can. My mom went into labor. We didn’t have a car, didn’t have insurance and she refused to have us call an ambulance. I don’t know, maybe she thought if an EMT came in and saw our living conditions, they’d remove us. Made me wish I’d called the ambulance.”
Her tone turned grim. She was letting him in, and he planned to take advantage. He wanted to know her.
“Anyway, it was her, Diamond, me and some guy who could’ve been Storm’s father, I don’t know. There were so many men in and out of the place I couldn’t keep track. She’s about to give birth and all she has is a nine-year-old, a five-year-old, and a drunk. It’s amazing Storm was born alive.”
Travis picked up her hand and held it. Finally, she gave him a weak smile. She didn’t pull away from his touch.
“So, you helped deliver him?”
“I did. And then when he was born, I was so scared. No one would cut the cord, so I ran to the nearest neighbor, Mrs. Carbonni, and begged her to come and help. She didn’t want to. I’m sure she was too scared to have anything to do with us. She came over anyway and finished the job. Before she left she told my mom to clean up her act because one of these days someone would report her and she’d lose us. For a while my mom must’ve listened because the drunk was out the door and she spruced the place up a bit. She even talked about sending me to kindergarten.”
The Staying Kind Page 10
