Mark raised an eyebrow. “Sorry to hear it isn’t going that great. Well, come on inside and get comfortable. I think the pool house is the way you left it. Sometimes Hope goes out there to study, but I doubt if she made a mess.”
Hope had indeed spent time in the pool house. She’d called me many times from inside. Although Mark was still talking, I was picturing her rolling around in my sheets taking in my manly scent. When I started to smile, I realized they were all standing around me.
“It is really good to be home,” I announced.
Buffy talked Mark into going out to dinner, and with Hope still not speaking to him much, he said yes immediately. He hadn’t even made a big deal out of her picking me up from the airport. Maybe me being away had given him time to realize I would risk my life for her safety, not cause her harm. Maybe he felt bad for sending me away, or perhaps he felt sorry for everything Hope went through. It was obvious she was in a good mood, which was probably rare. Aside from him being there at first with her mother’s illness, he’d gone back to business as if nothing happened. It irked me.
After being home for only about half an hour, Mark got a phone call and had to run to the strip mall to meet with a potential new lease. Buffy had hugged me a million times and finally allowed me to breathe. As soon as Mark’s car pulled out of sight Hope was back in my arms. We strolled hand in hand to the pool house and closed the door behind us. Buffy said she would text us when he was back so Hope could just walk outside and act casual.
The funny thing was that Hope didn’t seem fazed by her father. I think she would have been okay with him seeing us together. Her animosity towards him was a little disturbing, and I realized that she had just reached her breaking point. There may have been no way for them to fix their relationship. The man had let his daughter get sexually assaulted while he sat back and did nothing to the kids involved. That was a crime in itself.
When we got inside the pool house, I noticed how clean it was.
“I came in here a lot more than both of them know about. In fact, I snuck out at night and slept in your bed a few nights. It might sound creepy, but I just wanted to be near you, well as close to you as I could be,” she admitted.
“Hope, I carry around a damn ribbon in my wallet. I have no room to talk,” I said confidently.
“The house is clean except for the sheets. I refused to change them. They still smell like you.” She smiled and marched toward the bedroom.
I followed her, while still picturing her rolling around in the sheets. “You know we don’t have much time right?” I said, as I watched her shirt come flying off and land on my head.
“We have enough time.”
I smiled and met her on my mattress, minus my clothes.
36
I’d wanted to spend the afternoon alone with Chance, but my father arrived home only an hour after he’d left. He and Buffy decided that we should all go to the Country Club to have an early dinner. Chance headed to the pool house to get cleaned up, while I stayed inside the main house to do the same.
My plan was that at the last minute I was going to tell my father I preferred to drive myself, in case they wanted to stay later. I knew Chance would volunteer to ride with me, which would give us some more alone time.
The fall weather was causing it to be cool outside, especially in the afternoons, so I made it a point to wear something that I could put a sweater over. I chose a strapless black dress with blue and white designs in it. It came up above my knees, but looked cute with a cardigan on top.
My hair had really grown since the summer, which now covered my entire back. I curled each of the ends and pulled the sides up so it looked fuller. After putting on a bit of makeup, I stood back and looked at my appearance. My most favorite part of the whole outfit was my necklace from Chance. It hung perfectly in the center of my chest.
Satisfied that Chance would be impressed, I headed downstairs. Buffy decided to wear something other than pink. She wore a navy blue suit that made her look older than she normally dressed; a strand of pearls were wrapped around her neck, while her hair was curled to perfection.
“You look beautiful,” I said as she came downstairs.
“So do you. Wow!” She replied.
My father followed behind and put his arms around Buffy’s waist. “You will be the two best looking women in the club tonight.”
“We better be,” Buffy said as she gave him a once over. “Hope, why don’t you go see if Chance is ready yet.”
“Okay.” I said calmly, but really I wanted to simultaneously scream and jump up and down.
I was wearing heels, which made it impossible to run toward the pool house. I adjusted my dress at least three times before making it to the entrance. When I opened the door, I could smell Chance’s cologne. I followed the scent toward the bathroom and lost my breath at how handsome he looked.
Chance was wearing a pair of black pants. His blue polo shirt displayed every muscle on his arms and chest. While he had been away, I washed all of the clothes he still had in boxes and then hung them up. He obviously appreciated my hard work by wearing one of the outfits.
“Well, don’t you clean up nice.”
Chance took one look at me and flew out of the bathroom. “Hope. Damn, you look fantastic.” He kissed me gently on the lips. “And thanks for the work you did in my closet.”
“You’re welcome.” I said, as I wiped my lip-gloss off his lips. “They’re waiting for us.”
“Let me just get my wallet and I’ll be there.”
I decided not to push my luck with my father and headed out to the driveway. As I approached the car, I heard Chance running to catch up behind me. “Sorry you guys had to wait,” he said.
“It’s fine, Chance. Are we ready to go?” My dad asked.
I interrupted. “Um dad, I was thinking I should drive my own car. If you guys want to stay late, I can head home early. I just want to have the option, you know?”
My dad creased his brow and looked over to Buffy. She gave him a nod and his face calmed. “Probably a good idea, sweetie. You know how I get when I run into my golf buddies.”
I started to walk alone to my car and heard Chance calling. “Hope, wait! I’ll ride with you, so you don’t have to drive alone.” He turned to face my dad. “Is that cool with you guys?”
“Of course it is,” Buffy announced.
Chance got into the passenger side before I’d even opened my door. “Good plan.”
“Thanks!” I said, as I started the car.
We got out of the driveway and followed my dad out of the community. Chance suggested that I not follow too close so he could kiss my hand and play with my hair. Luckily, when we came into town my father ran a yellow light and we stayed when it turned red. At the same exact time, we leaned into one another for a kiss. “You’re so beautiful,” Chance said, as he looked into my eyes.
We were interrupted from our sweet moment when the person behind me started honking, because the light had turned back to green.
That old woman had ruined our make-out session. If I hadn’t missed my girlfriend so much, I wouldn’t have minded. Hope welcoming me home was even better than I’d thought it would be. She seemed different, but yet, still the same. Her hair was longer and something about her face made her seem more mature, but whatever it was, I loved it.
Working that construction job had been pure hell. There’d been so many times where I wanted to buy a cheap car and come home. I played out in my mind how I’d pick up Hope and we would drive as far away as we could. Hope and I would sit awake at night talking about everything.
Mark had only made us stronger and now that I was back, I knew I needed to pull him aside and tell him I didn’t want to return to South Carolina. I would have appreciated the job if I hadn’t met Hope, but I had something to live for now, and being away from her was killing me.
As if she was reading my mind, Hope brought up the topic. “I’m not going to let you get back on that plane, Chance.�
�
I grabbed her hand and kissed it. “Are you going to wrestle me to the ground?” I asked sarcastically. “Because, I think I would really like that.”
“Don’t act like you want to go back. Based on your performance last night, I’d say you were glad to be home.”
I chuckled. “Are you kidding me? Don’t ever ask that. Of course I want to be home.” I looked over at Hope, and ran my hand across her cheek. “I don’t want to ever go back, Hope. I just want to be here with you.”
We came to another red light and Hope looked over at me. “I know, I know! I guess I’m just on edge. I finally have you back and all I keep thinking about is the fact that you have to leave,” she confessed.
“I’ll find a way to stay. I’ve saved up some money, at least enough to get a place and be able to pay for a few months until I can find a job here. I’ll do whatever it takes.”
Knowing that Hope was worried, and the fact that we were on our way to have dinner with the person who put us in this situation, was ridiculous. I hated seeing her hurting.
“Maybe we should just tell him we’re together?”
I ran my hands through my hair. “Hope, it‘s not that easy. He could refuse to let me see you. He could get your mother involved. We only have a short time before your birthday. Just let me handle it. I’ll figure something out.”
“What if you don’t?” She asked.
“I will. Just relax. I’ll handle this.”
She looked worried. “Well I can’t handle you being gone again. I know I sound like a selfish little girl, but it’s true. It hurt so much. I needed you. My mom got sick and I felt like I was alone. I needed you to hold me and reassure me that she would be okay, even if at the time it wasn’t true. None of this has been easy for me,” she admitted.
We were getting close to the club, and I knew I needed to calm her down before Mark started poking around with questions.
“Hope, I adore you, and I assure you I’ll do whatever it takes.”
“Thanks. I know you will. I’m sorry for being so annoying about it. I just can’t imagine ever losing you.”
I leaned over and kissed her cheek. My lips touched the base of her ear. “You will never lose me, and I don’t find you annoying. I actually feel amazed every time I hear you say how much you want to be with me.”
Hope smiled. “It’s good to have you back, Chance.”
“I know,” I said, as I rubbed the back of her neck.
We finally turned into the club, and prepared for a long night with her father. Who knew what kind of conversations we would have, or what we’d eat. My concerns were more about keeping my distance from Hope, when all I wanted to do was tell the world she was mine.
37
I hated the Country Club. Trevor had brought me every weekend when we’d dated. His father was a fixture, who probably kept the place in business. Before me, Trevor had found this establishment to be a great place for banging chicks. In fact, this was where he’d taken my innocence.
One night a bunch of us kids snuck on the grounds and took some of the golf carts out. Rylee had hooked up with some football player and they went rolling out onto the greens somewhere, leaving me alone with Trevor.
He’d made many advances toward me having sex with him. At first they were sweet and innocent, but the longer I held out, the more physical he became. The truth was that Trevor always scared me and I found myself doing things so that he wouldn’t yell at me, or call me awful names. On nights like that night, he threatened to tell the whole school I had an STD, or that I was a lesbian which was why we weren’t sleeping together. He threatened to say that I’d let his friends have their way with me all at the same time. You name it, he’d said it to scare me. That night he used the excuse that everyone was doing it except for me. He said my pussy was going to dry up if I didn’t start putting out. Finally, after crying for a long period of time, fearing that I’d be the laughing stock of the school, I laid down on a patch of green grass and let him have his way with me.
I wasn’t ready. I didn’t even want it to happen.
I wasn’t in love with him.
Of course, being inexperienced left me without the knowledge of foreplay. I was completely dry when he entered me, which made it hurt even worse. I suppose I could have told someone, but felt too ashamed for doing it. After that night I didn’t care anymore. It was just sex, and it meant nothing to me. It’s another reason why I knew I couldn’t be with someone like him. I was tired of being controlled for acceptance.
Just thinking about that night made me so angry.
“What’s wrong, Hope? I thought you were okay?”
I shook my head while I continued looking for a parking spot. “This is where I lost my virginity. I hate this place.”
I suddenly thought back to when I knew I was truly ready to have sex; the moment when I knew that I wanted a guy without any doubt. I was confident with my body, and knew exactly how I wanted to feel. It had been my first night with Chance. After that night nothing with Trevor seemed to matter anymore. It was that night that made me see the difference. It showed me that I never loved Trevor, even when I tried to in order to make myself feel better about my choices.
Chance had showed me love and what it was like to actually make love. He would never force me, or hurt me and I appreciated him so much.
“Why didn’t you just tell your father that you wanted to go somewhere else?” He asked.
“Because ever since he got this stupid membership he’s been hell bent on spending every second here,” I explained. “Besides, it was a long time ago. I don’t care anymore.”
We started to get out of the car. “Was it with the dick head?” He asked.
“Yes!” I held my head down, trying to not think about him. “It was horrible, Chance. I wish I had just waited for you. You have no idea how much I wish that.”
Chance stroked my cheek and smiled. “He can’t hurt you now, Hope. I will never let him touch you again. I may not have been your first, but I damn sure want to be your last.” Chance smiled when he said it, sending a wave of butterflies throughout my body. He could do that to me, where no one else ever had before.
My father and Buffy approached us and we all toddled inside together. We appeared as a family. I guess a really messed up one at that. Apparently, my father had reserved us a table ahead of time, so we didn’t have to sit in a more common area of the restaurant. Our table was circular, and since Buffy slid in right next to my dad, Chance and I were able to sit together. He and I were able to touch legs the whole time. It may not have been much, in fact, it was seemingly innocent, but it was enough for me to feel connected to him.
Once we ordered our food, my father started talking to Chance about the town he worked in. He even had the nerve to ask him if he’d met anyone special. I felt Chance’s leg start rubbing against mine as he answered. “There is nothing there that I want. I go to work and then head back to the motel. It’s lonely, and I feel like it just drains the life out of me.”
“I’m sorry that it isn’t working out for you, Chance. I know Buffy hates that you’re so unhappy. Perhaps it is time for you to come home.” Before Chance could reply or I could scream, my dad started talking again. “I would have one condition if you came back though, Chance.”
Whatever it is, just take it…
“I don’t know what you said, or how you managed to do it, but you convinced my daughter to enroll in college.” He looked over at me. “Buffy told me all about it.” Then he looked back to Chance. “Thank you for that. I want so much for her and I could not be prouder. Therefore, my condition would be that you mentor her and help her get through any hard classes. I know how smart you are. College is tough. She can use the guidance.”
I could tell that Chance felt ecstatic. He still didn’t care for my father’s actions, but he could finally come home and I was so happy. We could be together, and still have animosity toward my dad. After all, he was a complete douche.
Was
this really happening? Was I being asked to come home and spend time with Hope? I didn’t waste any time accepting his offer. “Of course I’ll help Hope. I plan on enrolling there myself next semester anyway.”
Mark held up his drink. “Well since we’re celebrating, Buffy and I have another announcement.”
He turned to my sister, and I half expected her to yell out that she was pregnant, but instead she just gave him a smile. “We decided to get married on New Year’s Day,” Buffy announced.
A rush of relief went through me and I know it was the same for Hope. It wasn’t that neither of us wanted Buffy to have children, we just needed to be able to reveal our relationship first. “That’s great news,” I replied.
“Mark and I are going to have the wedding here with just a few close friends, and we want you both to stand up for us,” she said in an excited voice. Buffy started clapping and had a huge smile on her face.
“Sounds great, guys.” I said as I took another swig of my beer. I focused my attention to my girlfriend’s leg. Being this close to her was becoming difficult to remain calm. I wanted nothing more than to take her home and celebrate the fact that I wasn’t going anywhere.
When our food finally came everyone got quiet and started eating. Halfway through, Hope asked me to scoot out so that she could use the ladies room. I hadn’t noticed a change in her demeanor, but I couldn’t help get this feeling that something was wrong. The last thing I needed was to draw attention to how concerned I was about her in front of her father. All of my plans on coming home would be ruined, and I’d be back to living hundreds of miles away from her again.
After about two minutes I noticed Mr. Thomas heading to our table. I cleared my throat as he approached and fought with myself to put on a smile.
“Hey there. I didn’t know you’d be here tonight,” he said.
“Ah, Greg, we’re celebrating Chance coming home, and setting a date for the wedding,” Mark explained.
A Hope and a Chance Page 24
