"So tell us about this new job of yours, Amber,” Mum said as she squeezed Sophie's big toe.
I shifted in the bean bag I'd been relegated to and took a gulp of my coffee before answering. “Well, actually I've been doing something new, sort of psychic stuff."
"Don't try to be clever, dear. What have you really been doing?” Mum looked up over her specks and sprinkled a bit more talc on Sophie's feet.
"No, seriously, Mum, I've been telling the future for people, but it's ... well it's got me in a bit of, er, trouble—"
"Trouble?” Dad looked up from behind his newspaper.
"Well, you're not going to believe this, but..."
As the words tumbled out, my family remained silent. Dad leaned forward slightly in his chair, Mum stopped mid-massage with a deep frown furrowing her forehead, and Sophie watched me with her eyebrows raised and a cocky smile. I skirted round the bit about becoming a witch as I thought it might be too much for them to take in. Instead, I concentrated on explaining how my psychic predictions appeared to have come true and the physical evidence that demonstrated my karmic debt.
"So, you see, I know this karma thing sounds farfetched, but I thought since apparently it all begins with family,” I paused and looked at Sophie, remembering the time I pushed her into a cowpat on her birthday, “I ... thought I better come and apologize just in case and see if you've got any suggestions.” I swallowed and looked at their faces.
Mum's mouth became a thin line and Dad looked totally bemused.
Sophie put down her coffee and began clapping slowly. “Bravo. This has to be the ultimate attention seeking ploy, ever. Really, Mum, did you ever hear anything so ridiculous?"
"So this is how you've chosen to use your university degree, is it, Amber?” Mum put Sophie's feet gently down and I shuffled on the beanbag nervously.
"No, I mean, I didn't ask for it to turn out this way. I want to get back to normal—"
"I always knew that Tanya was a bad influence. Well, you've obviously got this absurd thing out of your system now, so let's not hear any more about it."
"It's just another of her fads, Mum, you don't need to take it seriously. Remember the time she was going to be an anthropologist?” Sophie hitched herself up on the couch, anxious to regain the limelight again as Mum continued to glare at me.
"That was when I was 15, Sophie,” I countered. “And you were going to be Miss World and marry a millionaire remember?"
"Now, now, you two,” said Dad, “that's all water under the bridge. If Amber here's got a gift, she shouldn't look it in the mouth."
"No, Dad, you don't understand—” I began.
"Don't encourage her, Eric. I don't want to hear any more of this nonsense.” Mum's sharp words cut across the room. She lifted Sophie's feet onto her knee again and patted them. “Now, Sophie, you were saying about your job, do you think the team building exercise will really help next week?"
I shook my head. I couldn't allow Mum to ignore this. I had to get them to understand. “Look, why don't I tell your fortunes? Then you'll see I'm serious."
"Oh, come on.” Sophie gave me a smug smile. “Stop going on about it. Nobody wants to know."
"Well, I wouldn't mind,” said Dad and I shot him a grateful look. “I've always been a bit ‘septic’ but the proof is in the pudding, I say."
Mum shook her head, ignoring us both and pressing Sophie's toes again. “Well, darling, you haven't answered my question. Will the teambuilding work, d'you think? I mean, going out to a nice country manor in Cirencester and building bridges over streams is all very well, but how is it going to stop that wretched temp from gossiping?"
"Maybe it'll be a bridge over troubled water?” Dad suggested.
My jaw clenched. Did Dad have to regurgitate everything in cliché form?
Sophie shrugged. “Well, as you know there's going to be twelve of us and we've come up with a bit of a plan you see..."
She tossed her drying curls and began to talk about her work while Mum refocused on pressing the right points on her foot and listened closely. Dad sank behind the newspaper again, humming a little to himself. I had been waved away like an irritating fly. The injustice of it prickled my skin. I looked at Mum and Sophie absorbed in each other. I had to do something to make them listen. I struggled up from the beanbag.
"Don't move anyone, I'll be right back!” I announced, ignoring Sophie's ‘tut’ and racing out to the hall to where my jacket was hanging on the clothes stand. I reached in the pocket and pulled out my tarot cards.
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Chapter Twenty-Four
An Unexpected Phone Call
"Right. So who wants to know what the future holds for Sophie?” I breezed back into the room and plumped back onto the beanbag as noisily as possible.
Sophie stopped talking and Mum looked over her glasses at me as I began to shuffle, cut, and flip the pack expertly between my fingers.
"Come on, Soph, it might tell you how to handle your team building exercise.” I fanned out the cards on the floor in front of the couch. The only way to get them to listen would be to focus on Sophie. “Just one card, it's ever so quick."
My plan worked. Sophie never could resist stepping into martyr mode.
"Oh, I suppose she's never going to stop going on until she gives someone a reading. No, it's ok, Mum, I don't mind, we might as well hear it.” Sophie swung her legs over the edge of the couch and rested her chin on her hands.
"Okay then, what do I have to do?” She fluttered her tinted eyelashes at me.
"Just shuffle, choose one card and let your mind go blank...” I mimicked her smile, and handed her the pack. “Oh, I forgot it already is...” I added under my breath.
Sophie snatched the deck away and shuffled daintily. “There. Chosen."
She handed me a card and I turned it over and felt the hairs on my arms prickle slightly. It couldn't be right, I thought. It was reversed, which meant the meaning was the opposite. The card she had chosen was The Lovers.
"Hey up, those two are as naked as the day they were born.” Dad leaned forward and angled his head round to get a better look at the naked bodies entwined under the cherub's bow and arrow.
Mum swiped at him with a nearby magazine. “Well? What does it mean?"
"Well, obviously it's about love ... in this case I would think you and Richard. When this card is reversed it may indicate some difficulties in a relationship..."
Sophie's eyes narrowed and she crossed her arms in a defensive pose.
"But we all know that Sophie's happily married to Richard and he's Mr. Perfect with the perfect job and the perfect house so—"
"How dare you. I don't have to listen to this!” Sophie exploded, standing up and letting all the rest of the cards she was holding drop onto the floor. Her curls were shaking as she stood over me on the bean bag. “I hope you're pleased with yourself!” Her voice cracked and her eyes glazed with tears.
"But I...” I looked up at her with my mouth open.
Sophie's hands were clenched into fists by her sides and, for a moment, I thought she would strike me. Instead she turned and rushed out of the room, leaving me blinking in a state of shock. Sophie had always been prone to tantrums, but that was a pretty major overreaction. She really couldn't bear for me to have any attention at all.
"She's a bit over tired,” said Mum, picking up the cards and handing them to me. “Been over doing it at work. You know how sensitive she is, couldn't you have been a bit kinder?"
I opened my mouth to reply and then stopped. What was the point?
"Well how about me then?” Dad sat forward in his armchair and his trousers rode up to swing by his ankles.
"Are you sure you're not going to get upset if you pick a bad card, Dad?” I began shuffling them again slowly and looked up.
"Well, you know what they say ... what you don't know can hurt you so I better find out."
"It's ‘can't hurt you,’ Dad.” I handed him the pack.
"I kno
w it can't, love.” Dad cut the pack and handed me a card.
My spirits lifted when I saw he'd drawn the ace of wands, a lovely card foretelling success, new activity, and beginnings. I rattled off a bunch of stuff about how his life would improve, how Mum and him would take up new hobbies together that would bring happiness whilst he smiled and nodded.
"So that Secret Gardens Competition this year? Go for it.” I finished.
"Well, I don't know about you, love, but I'd pay good money to hear that. Our girl's a proper psychic, isn't she? We hadn't even told her about our country dancing that we've signed up for, have we?"
"Oh that's just a fluke, silly.” Mum sniffed and held her hands out for the cards.
After a short shuffle Mum had chosen too. I was a little surprised as I turned over her card—the Queen of Wands.
"Is that me, then?” Mum tapped the attractive woman holding a scepter on a throne with a man bowing at her feet.
"Look, I'm on there too, groveling to get out of the dishes,” joked Dad.
"Yes. It shows you are a strong woman with a good handle on practical matters.” I began.
Interest glimmered in Mum's eyes as she leaned closer. Perhaps flattery combined with a little subconscious direction to take me seriously would do the job.
"You will come to the aid of someone you love and help them through a difficult time. I sense it's a family member, they've been trying to tell you something but it's not been getting through.” Mum frowned and she put her hand on her hip in an ‘I know what you're up to’ look, so I changed tack.
"Some kind of crisis will be averted,” I improvised, hoping the universal laws would judge in my favor. “I also see that financial matters will improve in an unexpected way and well, you're both going to be very happy together.” I knew Mum and Dad didn't have a great deal of cash since Dad had retired from agricultural sales. Since whatever I said had come true in the past, I thought I might as well say something nice.
"I like the sound of the money,” said Dad.
Mum sighed and sat back. “Have you got it out of your system now then? Is that it with the fortune telling nonsense?"
"No, Mum, I mean, I really could be psychic."
"So what are tomorrow's winning lottery numbers then? Why haven't you predicted you'll be rich and famous?"
"Actually that's a really good point. I hadn't thought of that. Well I could try it if you like and see what..."
"Don't waste more time on this useless notion, Amber, I can assure you, you are not psychic. I've had better readings from my manicurist."
Mum shoved her specks up her nose and I prepared myself for a lecture.
"I can see you're off color, and you've lost a little weight too which makes your face look more angular, but you've always had big feet anyway and...” she began as Dad retreated behind the newspaper, “...you really need to start looking after yourself if you're ever going to do anything with your life. Your hair needs a crop for starters, then you should book yourself a jolly good facial, and your attitude needs a major makeover if—"
The sound of the phone in the hall stopped Mum mid sentence.
"I'll get it.” I stumbled up from the beanbag, glad to escape from Mums tirade.
I snatched up the receiver in the hall. “Hello?"
"Amber? Amber! Thank god I've finally tracked you down. What the hell's going on? Are you alright? Why aren't you speaking to me? Monique says you're having some kind of crisis..."
"Harvey.” Hearing his voice made my hands tremble. “I'm sorry I've not been in touch, I just had to get away. I can't really explain. It's, well, I've changed, am changing and—” I bit my lip as he interrupted.
"Why didn't you return my calls?"
I nudged the door to the lounge closed with my foot and lowered my voice. I didn't want to give Mum another reason to grill me. “I'm really sorry, I can't explain what's happening, it's personal."
"More personal than the elephant posture? Come on, talk to me.” Harvey's tone was full of concern.
"I'm just not sure I'm a good person to be around at the moment. I don't want to hurt you—"
"You're dumping me, aren't you?"
"No!"
"But you don't want to see me or speak to me."
"It's not that I don't want to..."
Harvey sighed. “When are you coming back?"
"Tomorrow, but I don't think I can see you—"
"I thought it was men that were comittophobics. Look,” he said softly, “if you're going through a rough patch, I want to be there for you. I'll wait for you in the Pig ‘n Whistle tomorrow evening at 7 P.M. If you're not there, I'll take the hint."
"But—"
"Amber, I love you. There, I've said it. I'll be waiting for you tomorrow."
"Harvey, I—"The phone had gone dead. “Love you, too,” I added in a choking sob. I ran into the small bedroom and flung myself on the camp bed, which, unfortunately folded up on my impact.
I muttered a string of curses under my breath as I pushed down the springs and pulled the rumpled duvet over my head. I didn't want to speak to anyone. I just wanted to be alone with Harvey's words in my head. I had to try and sort things out before tomorrow evening.
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Chapter Twenty-Five
All Choked Up
The clink of cups and sound of Adam's angry cries in the kitchen woke me from a dreamless sleep which left me feeling drugged and heavy headed. I licked my cracked lips and ran a hand through my hair with a yawn. Being careful not to jerk the unpredictable camp bed, I sat up gingerly. Every bone in my body was aching and tired. I remembered last night with a groan and heaved myself up reluctantly to totter through to the bathroom to freshen up.
"Morning, everyone,” I said cheerily as I opened the kitchen door, but stopped as I saw them.
Mum and Dad were staring at Sophie who, for once, looked a total mess. She was still in her dressing gown, fingering the tablecloth and looking at Mum with her eyes red rimmed and her hair tousled from sleep.
"Everything alright?” I looked at Mum who pulled back her chair and went to hug Sophie fiercely.
"Your sister's just dropped a bit of bombshell,” Dad patted my arm and motioning me to sit down.
"It's going to be alright, don't you worry. I'll look after all the practical things, and you can come and stay here for as long as you want, darling.” Mum wrapped her arms around Sophie who turned into her shoulder and began sobbing.
"Your sister's getting a divorce,” Mum said over Sophie's shoulder, smoothing her curls.
"What? God. I'm so sorry, Soph.” I stood behind my chair, shocked.
"As if you didn't know—all that stuff about Richard being Mr. Perfect. You saw the solicitor's letter in my bedroom, didn't you?” Sophie looked up, her skin blotchy and her bottom lip trembling.
"No. I had no idea.” I shook my head as I thought about last night's readings. Hadn't I said that there were difficulties in the relationship?
"Don't worry about that now, darling.” Mum shot me a warning look and rubbed Sophie's arm. “Straight after breakfast we'll make a list of what we need to do."
"Mum, I wish I'd told you earlier. I've been trying to tell you, I just couldn't find the words...” Sophie broke into noisy sobs again and I couldn't help wonder if secretly she was enjoying all the attention.
"There, there, pet, have a good cry, it's better out than in. Plenty more fish in the sea...” Dad reeled off a list of comforting clichés and reached over to pat Sophie's arm.
I stood there awkwardly. “More tea anyone?"
Dad handed me his cup.
"Now you must try to eat something, my darling.” Mum said.
"I really don't think I can, Mum.” She looked down at her empty plate.
Mum buttered some toast and placed it in front of Sophie. “Now, you just eat that and Amber will pour you a nice cup of tea won't you?"
I nodded mutely as Mum waved me off in the direction of the kitchen. I g
lanced backward as I stepped through the doorway. Sophie blew her nose hard and looked down miserably at the piece of toast on the plate.
As I poured the tea from the pot in the kitchen, I realized I didn't feel any satisfaction from Sophie's misery. If the roles had been reversed, she'd have been delighting in a string of ‘told you so's, but I just hadn't the heart to muster any spite towards her. I slopped the tea on my hand and the hot liquid scalded me. I flushed it under the cold water. As I turned off the tap I heard a strange gurgled coughing sound and Mum's voice rise with panic.
"Spit it out, darling! Eric, do something!"
I poked my head back round the door just in time to see Sophie, rising from her chair, clutching her throat with her eyes bulging. She half leaned over the table, retching and turning blue. Mum's face was a mask of horror whilst Dad hesitantly tried to pat Sophie on the back with about as much force as a flea.
I had a sudden flash back to the Tantric sex class and the erotic version of the Heimlich Maneuver with Rupert's hands gripped firmly under Irene's bosom. I barged Mum out of the way, pushed Dad to one side, and clasped my hands firmly round Sophie's chest and jerked as hard as I could.
"Urhhhh pluhhhh!” The toast flew out of her mouth and she spluttered and gasped as she caught her breath. She swung round to look at me, her eyes were still bloodshot but her face had now turned to a motley red. “Are you ... trying ... to ... kill me?"
I couldn't believe what I was hearing. I looked to Mum and Dad for support, but Mum was looking at me strangely, her eyebrows raised in surprise. Dad looked puzzled, his mouth slightly ajar as he looked from me to Sophie.
"I just stopped you choking, you idiot.” I glared back into Sophie's angry eyes. “It's called the Heimlich Maneuver."
Dad held up a finger and a smile broke over his face.
"Gosh, lovey, you did well to remember that.” He patted me on the back. “You must have been only a tiny tot when you saw that Bruce Lee film."
I resisted the urge to argue the point as Mum blinked and went to help Sophie to sit down.
"You gave us all quite a shock, darling. It's a good job your sister knew some first aid."
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