by L. J. Smith
Abruptly the fight ended and they both became human. They were battered, but Elena felt that there was nothing more that she could do if they chose to fight again.
Instead Shinichi said, “I’m breaking the globe. Here,” he turned to Damon and shut his eyes, “is where your precious brother is. I’m putting it into your mind—if you can decode the map. And once you get there, you’ll die. Don’t say I didn’t warn you.”
To Elena he bowed and said, “I regret that you’ll be dying, too. But I’ve memorialized you in an ode.
Wild rose and lilac,
Bee’s balm and daisy,
Elena’s smile chases
The winter away.
Bluebell and violet,
Foxglove and iris,
Watch where she treads
And then watch the grass sway.
Wherever her feet pass,
White flowers part the grass—”
“I’d rather hear a straight explanation of where the keys are,” Elena said to Shinichi, knowing that after that song she wouldn’t get any more from Misao. “Frankly, I’m sick and tired of all your bullshit.”
She noticed that once again everyone was staring at her and she could feel why. She could feel a difference in her voice, in her stance, in her patterns of speech. But mostly, inside, what she felt was freedom.
“We’ll give you this much,” Shinichi said. “We won’t move them. Find them from the clues—or by other means, if you can.” He winked at Elena and turned away—to meet a pale and trembling Nemesis.
Caroline. Whatever else she’d been doing for the last few minutes, she had been crying, and rubbing her eyes, and wringing her hands—or so Elena guessed from the distribution of her makeup.
“You, too?” she said to Shinichi. “You, too?”
Shinichi smiled his lazy smile. “And what two am I?” He held up two fingers in the V symbol to differentiate his two from Caroline’s.
“You’ve fallen for her, too? Making up songs—giving her clues to find Stefan—”
“They’re not very good clues,” Shinichi said comfortingly and smiled again.
Caroline tried to hit him, but he caught her fist. “And you think you’re leaving now?” Her voice was pitched at a scream—not as high as Misao’s glass-splintering shriek, but with its own fearsome vibrato.
“I know we’re leaving.” He glanced at the sullen Misao. “After one more item of business. But not with you.”
Elena tensed up, but Caroline was trying to attack Shinichi again. “After what you said to me? After all that you said?”
Shinichi looked her up and down, seeming to actually see her for the first time. He also looked genuinely bewildered. “Said to you?” he asked. “Have we spoken before tonight?”
There was a high-pitched giggle. Everyone turned. Misao was standing, giggling, her hands over her mouth.
“I used your image,” she said to her brother, her eyes on the floor as if confessing to a minor fault. “And your voice. In the mirror, when I would give her orders. She was on the rebound from some guy who’d dumped her. I told her I’d fallen in love with her and that I wanted to get revenge on her enemies—if she’d just do a few little things for me.”
“Like spreading malach through little girls,” Damon said grimly.
Misao giggled again. “And a boy or two. I know what it feels like to have those malach inside you. It doesn’t hurt at all. They’re just—there.”
“Have you ever had one force you to do something you didn’t want to?” Elena demanded. She could feel her blue eyes blazing. “Do you think that would hurt, Misao?”
“It wasn’t you?” Caroline was still looking at Shinichi; she obviously couldn’t keep up with the script. “It wasn’t you?”
He sighed, smiling slightly. “Not me. Golden hair is my undoing, I’m afraid. Golden…or fiery red against black,” he added hastily, glancing at his sister.
“So it was all a lie,” Caroline said, and for a moment, desperation was written on her face larger than anger, with sadness larger than both. “You’re just another Elena fan.”
“Look,” Elena said bluntly, “I don’t want him. I hate him. The only guy I care about is Stefan!”
“Oh, he’s the only guy, is he?” Damon asked, with a glance toward Matt, who had carried Bonnie up close to them while the fox-fight was going on. Mrs. Flowers and Dr. Alpert had followed.
“You know what I mean,” Elena told Damon.
Damon shrugged. “Many a golden-haired lassie ends as the rough yeoman’s bride.” Then he shook his head. “Why am I spouting drek like this?” His compact body seemed to tower over Shinichi.
“It’s just a residual effect…from being possessed…you know.” Shinichi fluttered his hands, his eyes still on Elena. “My thought patterns…”
It looked as if another fight was brewing, but then Damon just smiled and said, narrow-eyed, “So you let Misao have her way with the town while you went after Elena and me.”
“And—”
“Mutt,” Damon said hastily and automatically.
“I was going to say Stefan,” Elena said. “No, I would guess that Matt was the victim of one of Misao and Caroline’s little schemes before he and I ran into you when you were completely possessed.”
“And now you think you can just walk away,” Caroline said, in a shaking, menacing voice.
“We are walking away,” Shinichi said stiffly.
“Caroline, wait,” Elena said. “I can help you—with Wings of Purification. You’re being controlled by a malach.”
“I don’t need your help! I need a husband!”
There was utter silence on the roof. Not even Matt stepped up to the plate on this one.
“Or at least a fiancé,” Caroline muttered, one hand on her abdomen. “My family would accept that.”
“We’ll work it out,” Elena said softly—then, firmly, “Caroline, believe it.”
“I wouldn’t believe in you if…” Caroline’s answer was obscene. Then she spat in Elena’s direction. And then she was silent, by her own choice or because the malach inside her wanted it.
“Back to business,” Shinichi said. “Let’s see, our price for the service of the clues and the location is a little block of memory. Let’s say…from the time I first met Damon until now. Taken from Damon’s mind.” He smiled nastily.
“You can’t do that!” Elena felt panic shoot through her, starting in her heart and flying out to the farthest reaches of every limb. “He’s different now: he’s remembered things—he’s changed. If you take that memory away—”
“So will all the sweet changes go,” Shinichi told her. “Would you rather I took your memory?”
“Yes!”
“But you were the only one who heard the clues about the key. And in any case I don’t want to see things from your eyes. I want to see you…through his eyes.”
By now, Elena was ready to start another fight on her own. But Damon said, distancing himself already, “Go ahead and take what you like. But if you don’t get out of this town right after, I take off your head with these shears.”
“Agreed.”
“No, Damon—”
“Do you want Stefan back?”
“Not at that price!”
“Too bad,” Shinichi put in. “There is no other bargain.”
“Damon! Please—think about it!”
“I have thought. It’s my fault that the malach spread so far in the first place. It’s my fault for not investigating what was going on with Caroline. I didn’t care what happened to humans as long as the new arrivals kept away from me. But I can fix some of the things I did to you by finding Stefan.” He half turned to her, the old devil-may-care smile on his lips. “After all, taking care of my brother is my job.”
“Damon—listen to me.”
But Damon was looking at Shinichi. “Agreed,” he said. “You have yourself a deal.”
39
“We won the battle, but not the war,” Elena said sadly. She thought
it was the day after their fight with the kitsune twins. She couldn’t be sure of anything except that she was alive, that Stefan was gone, and that Damon was back to his old self again.
“Maybe because we didn’t have my precious brother,” he said, as if to prove it. They were driving in the Ferrari, trying to find Elena’s Jaguar—in the real world.
Elena ignored him. She also ignored the soft but vaguely annoying hiss that came from some device he’d installed that was not a radio, that just seemed to play voices and static.
A new kind of Ouija board? Audio instead of all that tedious spelling?
Elena felt herself shiver inside.
“You did give your word to go with me and find him. I swear it by—by the Other World.”
“You tell me that I did, and you’re not a liar—no, not to me. I can read your facial expressions now that you’re a human. If I gave my word, I gave my word.”
Human? Elena thought. Am I? What am I?—with the kind of Powers I have? Even Damon can see that the Old Wood has changed in the real world. It’s not an ancient, half-dead forest anymore. There are spring flowers in midsummer. There’s life everywhere.
“And in any case, it will give me plenty of time to be alone with you—my princess of darkness.”
And we’re back to that again, Elena thought wearily. But he’d leave me here stranded if I once suggested that we had laughed and walked in a clearing together—with him on his knees to adjust my footstool. Even I’m beginning to wonder if it was real.
There was a slight bump—as nearly as one could tell from Damon’s style of driving.
“Got it!” he cheered himself—and then, when Elena turned, ready to wrench the wheel to make him stop—he added coolly, “It was a piece of tire, for your information. Not many animals are black, arched, and a few tenths of an inch thick.”
Elena said nothing. What was there to say to Damon’s quips? But deep down she felt relieved that Damon wasn’t given to running over furry little animals as an amusement.
We’re going to be alone together for quite some time, she thought—and then realized that there was another reason she couldn’t just tell Damon to dry up and die. Shinichi had put the location of Stefan’s cell into Damon’s mind, not hers. She needed him desperately, to take her to the location, and to fight whoever was keeping Stefan captive.
But it was fine if he had forgotten that she had any Powers. Something to save for a rainy day.
At just that moment, Damon exclaimed “What the—” and leaned forward to adjust dials on the not-radio.
“—peating; all units be on the lookout for one Matthew Honeycutt, male Caucasian, five foot eleven inches, blond hair, blue eyes—”
“What is that?” Elena demanded.
“A police scanner. If you want to be able to really live in this great land of freedom, it’s best to know when to run—”
“Damon, don’t get me started on your lifestyle. I meant what was that about Matt?”
“It looks as if they’ve decided to bring him in at last. Caroline didn’t get much revenge yesterday night. I guess she’s taking a shot at it now.”
“Then we’ve got to get to him first—anything could happen if he stays in Fell’s Church. But he can’t take his car, and he won’t fit in this one. What are we going to do?”
“Leave him to the police?”
“Don’t, please. We have to—” Elena was beginning, when in a clearing to the left, like some vision sent to approve her scheme, the Jaguar appeared.
“That’s the car we’re taking,” she told Damon flatly. “At least it’s roomy. If you want your police scanner doo-hickey in it, then you’d better start uninstalling it from this one.”
“But—”
“I’ll go get Matt. I’m the only one he’ll listen to. Then we’ll leave the Ferrari in the Wood—or dump it in the creek if you want.”
“Oh, the creek, by all means.”
“Actually, we may not have time for that. We’ll just leave it in the Wood.”
Matt stared at Elena. “No. I won’t run.”
Elena turned the full intensity of her blue eyes on him. “Matt, get in the car. Now. You have to. Caroline’s dad is related to the judge who signed the order to get you. It’s a lynching, Meredith says. Even Meredith is telling you to run. No, you don’t need clothes; we’ll get clothes.”
“But—but—it’s not true—”
“They’ll make it true. Caroline will weep and sob. I never thought a girl would do this to get revenge, but Caroline is in a class of her own. She’s gone nuts.”
“But—”
“I said, get in! They’ll be here any minute. They’ve already been to your house and Meredith’s house. What are you doing at Bonnie’s, anyway?”
Bonnie and Matt glanced at each other. “Uh, just having a look at Bonnie’s mom’s car,” Matt said. “It’s on the fritz again, and—”
“Never mind! Come with me! Bonnie, what are you doing? Calling Meredith back?”
Bonnie jumped slightly. “Yes.”
“Tell her good-bye and we love her and good-bye. Take care of the town—we’ll be in touch—”
As the red Jaguar pulled away, Bonnie said into the phone, “You were right. She’s pulling a Straight A away. I don’t know whether Damon’s going—he wasn’t in the car.”
She listened for a moment and then said, “Okay, I will. I’ll see you.”
She hung up and got into action.
Dear Diary,
Today I ran away from home.
I guess you can’t really call it running away when you’re almost 18 and you take your own car—and when nobody knew you were home in the first place. So I’ll just say, tonight I’m on the run.
The other slightly shocking thing is that I ran away with two different guys. And neither of them is my guy.
I say that, but…I can’t help remembering things. The look in Matt’s eyes in the clearing—I honestly think he was prepared to die to protect me. I can’t help but think about what we once were to each other. Those blue eyes…oh, I don’t know what’s wrong with me!
And Damon. I know now that there’s living flesh under the layers and layers of stone he’s wrapped around his soul. It’s deeply hidden, but it’s there. If I’m being honest with myself, I have to admit that he touches something deep inside me that makes me shiver—a part of myself even I don’t understand.
Oh, Elena! Stop right now! You can’t go near that dark part of yourself, especially now that you have Power. You don’t dare go near it. Everything is different now. You have to be more responsible (something you’re not at all good at!).
And Meredith won’t be here to help me be responsible, either. How is this ever going to work out? Damon and Matt in the same car? On a road trip together? Can you imagine? Tonight, it was so late and Matt was so stunned by the situation that he couldn’t really take anything in. And Damon only smirked. But he’ll be in demonic form tomorrow, I know he will.
I still think it was a great pity that Shinichi had to take Wings of Redemption from Damon along with his memories. But I firmly believe that, deep down, there’s a tiny part of Damon that remembers how he was when we were together. And now he has to be worse than ever to prove that what he remembers was all a lie.
So while you’re reading this, Damon—I know you’ll get hold of it somehow and snoop—let me tell you that you were nice for a while, actually NICE, and it was fun. We talked together. We even laughed—at the same jokes. And you…you were gentle.
And now you’re going, “Nah, it’s just another Elena-plot to get me to think I can turn around—but I know where I’m going, and I don’t care.” Does that ring a bell, Damon? Have you said those words to someone recently? And if not, how do I know them? Could it be that for once I’m telling the truth?
Now I’m going to forget that you’re totally besmirching your honor by reading secret things that don’t belong to you.
What else?
First: I miss Stef
an.
Second: I didn’t really pack for this. Matt and I swung by the boardinghouse, and he grabbed the money Stefan left for me while I grabbed an armful of clothes out of the closet—heaven knows what I’ve got: Bonnie’s tops and Meredith’s pants, and not a decent nightgown to my name.
But at least I also got you, precious friend, a present Stefan was saving for me. I never really liked typing in a file marked “Diary” anyway. Blank books like you are my style.
Third: I miss Stefan. I miss him so badly that I’m crying while I’m writing about clothes. It looks as if that’s what I’m crying about, which makes me seem insanely shallow. Oh, sometimes I just want to scream.
Fourth: I want to scream now. It was only when we got back to Fell’s Church that we found what horrors the malach had left for us. There is a fourth little girl I think may be possessed like Tami, Kristin, and Ava—I couldn’t really tell, so I couldn’t do anything. I have the feeling that we definitely haven’t heard the last of this possession thing.
Fifth: But worst is what happened in the Saitou house. Isobel is in the hospital with raging infections in all her piercings. Obaasan, as everyone calls Isobel’s grandmother, was not dead as the first paramedics who got there thought. She was in a deep trance—reaching out to us. Whether some of the courage I got, some of the belief in myself, was really due to her, is something I’ll never know.
But in the den was Jim Bryce. He had…oh, I can’t write it. He was the captain of the basketball team! But he had eaten away at himself: his whole left hand, most of his right-hand fingers, his lips. And he had put a pencil through his ear into his brain. They say (I heard this through Tyrone Alpert, the doctor’s grandson) that it’s called Lesch-Nyhan Syndrome (sp? I only heard it said) and that it’s rare, but there are others just like him. That’s what the doctors say. I say it was a malach making him do it. But they wouldn’t let me in to try to take it out of him.
I can’t even say he’s alive. I can’t say if he’s dead. He’s going to a sort of institution where they keep long-term cases.
We failed there. I failed. It wasn’t really Jim Bryce’s fault. So he was with Caroline just one night, and from there he passed the malach to his girlfriend Isobel and to his little sister Tami. Then both Caroline and little Tami passed it along to others. They tried to give it to Matt, but he wasn’t about to let them.
