by J. Walker
I laughed again. “Really? Are you trying to get me drunk?”
He sat down next to me on the sofa.
“Maybe.” He answered casually.
“What if I’m trying to get you drunk, Derek?” I countered with a smirk.
He poured a tall cup of straight whiskey and handed it to me. I pushed it away and poured myself another cup, filling it half way. We both leaned back on the sofa, sipping from plastic cups filled with pilfered whiskey. The darkness continued to grow and the light from the candles flickered woefully, casting long shadows that danced across the walls. A cold wind howled mournfully outside and snow pelted the blackened windows but the little heater created a comfortable bubble of warmth around us.
I drained the last remaining drops of amber liquid and savored the warmth spreading across my limbs. I closed my eyes and stretched again. I desperately tried forcing my mind to think of something other than Derek sitting so close to me. It was far too distracting and I finally decided to break the easy silence between us. The whiskey was giving me a reckless bravado and if I didn’t say something soon, I would risk making a fool of myself by climbing onto his lap and kissing his gorgeous mouth.
“So, Derek.” I began, pouring another cup full of whiskey even though my words were already starting to slur. “Any words of wisdom you’d like to impart before you and your group head out?”
He was quiet and pensive for a moment before he answered.
“Always listen to your gut, Emily. They call it the gift of fear. If your gut says watch out, listen, pay attention. It’ll always be right. Always have a backup plan. A second position that your group can fall back on if anything happens to the compound’s integrity. Whether it’s zombies or mercs. This is a lawless land now.”
I digested his comments slowly. Within two weeks but hopefully more, we would be left to our own devices. Although we had survived just fine for months before their arrival, their presence gave us an extra feeling of security and confidence. We’d grown accustomed to the large group’s company and had come to enjoy their companionship as well as their skills. The familiar loneliness began to grow and replace the whiskey’s warmth with the chill of looming solitude.
He poured another cup of whiskey and I held my cup out for more as well.
“Cheers.” I said wearily.
“I have the utmost confidence in you and your ability to keep everyone safe. You’ve got some good people. If you keep working together, you’ll overcome whatever comes your way.”
The shrill yelping of coyotes could suddenly be heard outside the building. Derek placed his empty cup on the upturned crate before he stood and made his way to the front door. He pulled a corner of the newspaper off the glass door to see if they were inside the perimeter.
I did the same with my cup and followed closely behind, peeking over his shoulder to see.
“I see them.” I said. “They’re outside the gate. I’m sure they’ll move along soon enough but that’s a big pack.”
“You’re right. They’ll be gone by morning.” Derek replied.
Turning to face me, he leaned against the door.
“You drunk yet?” He asked with a grin.
I laughed and looked up at him, feeling a little lost in his eyes. “Not yet but I’ve got a nice buzz.”
“Good.” He murmured as he leaned towards me.
He cupped my face in his hand while his thumb lightly caressed my chin and his fingers stroked the nape of my neck. He slowly tilted my face up towards his while his other hand held me gently by the waist. We continued to move nearer to one another, both feeling a subtle uncertainty, until finally he held me more firmly and pulled me closer.
His mouth felt warm and wet against the soft flesh of my earlobe, eventually his lips left a hot trail across on my neck and caused a familiar warmth to rush through my body. I turned my face slightly, my lips finding his and in the soft candlelight we kissed.
It was a light kiss and far too fleeting but we remained in each other’s embrace, another painful hesitation having taken hold. We stood close but quiet, cautiously gauging the others reaction when suddenly he pulled me closer. Again our lips found each other but this time when we kissed, we met with a desperate need, an almost insatiable hunger.
Another moment of faltering indecision, a pause that considered for a passing instant a promise made to another, a vow taken in a different world. I knew where his thoughts travelled, his wife, his children, they might still be out there. I knew by now, that Marcus was long gone to me, I felt it in my soul. Yet for moment, I was overcome by guilt and a transient feeling of doubt.
Despite any misgivings, my heart continued to race and my breathing came in shallow, needy gasps. With my eyes still half closed, I stood on my toes and craned my neck to reach up to softly nibble on his lower lip, his chin, his neck.
My hands pulled desperately at the buttons on his shirt but found frustration when they met the plain white shirt he wore underneath. I tugged at it roughly and pulled it out from the waist band of his pants. I ran my hands lightly across his chest before I yanked the shirt off, throwing it carelessly to the floor.
His hands were gently fondling my breasts through my shirt and soon he was pulling it off. After a momentary struggle with my bra, it too came off and both were tossed in a heap on the floor. His mouth found my breasts, my nipples and he softly grazed them with his tongue and his teeth.
Eventually I felt his hands move to my buttocks and cupping them, he lifted me up, pressing me against the wall. I wrapped my legs around his waist and felt his erection between my legs, making me want him that much more.
With my legs still wrapped around him, Derek carried me over to the sofa and gently set me down on the blankets. I laid back on the sofa and allowed him to remove my comfortable yoga pants and thong before I sat up again. He stood before me and with deft fingers I slowly undid the button, pausing to massage him through his jeans before sliding the zipper down. My anticipation continued to grow and I hastily slipped his garments down, letting them fall to the floor at his feet.
With eagerness, my hands went around him and gripped his buttocks, pulling him closer. My tongue flicked slowly at the tip of his cock, teasing him gently, before wrapping my lips around it and pulling him into the warmth of my mouth. His soft groan of pleasure sent waves of longing that reached deep inside my loins. It wasn’t long before his hands were pulling me away and he went to his knees, his lips finding mine in the growing darkness.
We kissed with an urgent need as he forced my legs apart with his body, pushing me down on the blankets piled high on the sofa. His mouth was hot and wet, leaving a trail of saliva that cooled the heat of my flesh as it bent down to suckle my hardened nipples. His calloused hands kneaded my breasts before seeking out the wet, needy place between my legs. I sighed with pleasure as his fingers slid inside me, pausing to lightly caress my aching clitoris triggering the first waves of an intense climax that caused my body to spasm with its force.
I cried out and my fingernails dug into his shoulders as his body pressed against mine, his cock effortlessly sliding inside me. A wave of ecstasy that began at the center of my groin, rapidly spread with warmth throughout me and I grasped his backside firmly, pulling him deeper and deeper into me. My body arched and moved to desperately meet the urgency of his powerful thrusts when his motions slowly came to a stop.
His lips were suddenly on mine again, his hands gripped my hair as he withdrew and turned me over, on my hands and knees, to enter me from behind. I groaned with gratification at the sensation of his hard cock pushing so deep inside me. He brought me again and again to the brink of yet another orgasm before his movements slowed to delay my climax, teasing me over and over, until I was begging him not to stop.
With his hands planted firmly on my hips, he pulled me closer and closer until our bodies crested on a surging wave of our final climax. My body shuddered with divine pleasure as I felt him burst inside me and the motion ceased. His warm han
ds caressed my back as he withdrew and he turned me over on my back again.
Derek lay on top of me and I looked at him with eyes still heavy with desire and need. My hands stroked his face while his hands brushed the hair away from mine. We kissed again, slowly and deliberately, hands and fingers deftly fondling one another without the burning demand of moments ago. Eventually bringing the other once again to a state of arousal that would consume us for hours to come.
We made love over and over again, with an urgency reserved for those whose days’ are numbered. It was a passion not driven by the deep abiding love two people who have spent their lives together might share. Rather, it was driven by a fervent need, a frantic and ravenous hunger. To know, to confirm, that this wasn’t a horrible dream, that we weren’t drifting alone through this nightmare. That we were truly alive and not merely surviving. We were two living and breathing souls that needed the confirmation of another’s touch, another’s warm body, to remind ourselves, that yes, we lived. We lived with passion and joy but also with grief and sorrow.
At the end of it all, my body wracked with the final tremors of a joy, a desire long since denied. I was so overcome by it all, that I wept tears of a pleasure so intense, I doubted I’d ever feel something like this again. Sated at last, we lay in each other’s arms quietly for a long time. It felt so good to find rest and comfort in his arms at last. I closed my eyes and quickly fell fast asleep.
When I woke up, the candles had burned down and were now nothing more than puddles of hardened wax. Derek was still resting quietly beside me but he wasn’t asleep. I lifted my head from his chest to look at him.
“Are you okay?” I asked.
“Yeah, I’m fine.” He smiled at me warmly. “Just thinking.”
“I know and I understand. You’re leaving in a few weeks and you’re going to find your family. Then you’ll probably end up fighting the war against the dead. There’s nothing to explain, nothing at all. I really just needed…..this.”
He kissed the top of my head before he answered. “I’m afraid that when I get there, I won’t find them. That they’ll be dead or turned.”
“I’m sure they’re better off than we are. You’ll find them.”
“If I don’t. If I don’t find them, Emily. One day, I’ll come back. I promise.”
“Derek, don’t make me promises you can’t keep. Don’t make me wait for something that may never happen. Look what happened to Marcus. Look what happened to John. They both made the same kind of promises. So please, let’s just have this, for the time we have left. For whatever it’s worth. Maybe one day, we’ll find each other again.”
I sighed heavily and rested my head on his chest again. I listened sadly to the beating of his heart while the soothing rise and fall of his chest with each breathe he took gave me comfort, however transient it was.
Chapter Nineteen
The following morning greeted me with the aroma of instant black coffee. Derek had risen before me and was preparing us a hot breakfast. I yawned and stretched before I rose, wrapping myself in the warm blankets. I found my clothing stacked in a neat, folded pile at the end of the sofa. While dressing, I smiled to myself, recalling the previous night.
“Good morning.” Derek said, handing me a cup of warm coffee.
His other hand held a plate of fried Spam and potatoes paired with some scramble eggs.
“Mmmmm.” I said, eagerly accepting the proffered plate of food. “Smells delicious.”
He sat down beside me and we ate our breakfast while discussing the plans for the day.
“Are we going to hit up the rest of the storage units today?” I asked him.
“Absolutely. I’m sure we’ll eventually find something useful.” He replied between mouthfuls.
“Have we heard from Jenna yet?”
“Not yet. They said the latest they’d be here was tomorrow.”
“We should check in.” I suggested.
We finished our breakfast and contacted the group by radio. Jenna replied immediately, saying they’d be leaving at first light the following morning. She confirmed it shouldn’t take any longer than two hours, hopefully less, to get back to our location at the safe house.
As I donned my winter gear, I gave serious consideration about this location being used for more than just a safe house. I planned to immediately begin discussion with the others to develop a plan regarding how we might begin securing this location as a third fall back base or an outpost at the very least.
Derek was right, this place was perfect for a third location, if we ever did find other survivors. Serving as an outpost, a group could remain here, well supplied, while keeping a vigilant watch on the area. Although we had the cottages in the conservation area, that location was still too close to the compound if its security was compromised in any way.
“Ready?” Derek asked.
“Yes. Let’s go.”
He held the door open for me but I stopped in front of him. Standing on my toes, I reached up to kiss him. He let the door close and pulled me closer. We stood there for a few more minutes, lost in the warmth of each other’s embrace.
Finally, I pulled away. “We’re never going to get anything done today.”
He grinned sheepishly and sighed. “Yeah, you’re right. Let’s get this done so we can take care of other things.”
We found some plastic storage bins to hold anything practical we might find in the remaining units. Derek had the large ring of keys and we set out into the sunny but frigid morning air. He walked over to the main entry gates to examine the footprints of the coyotes we heard the night before.
“Anything interesting?” I called out.
“No, just checking out the tracks left behind. Looks like a good sized pack has taken over the neighborhood.”
We worked tirelessly until lunchtime, rummaging through the units. We were acquiring an ever growing stockpile of various goods. We also found a small U-Haul trailer that we hooked up to the back of the beaten up old snowplow. The plastic bins had taken up quite a bit of space and we still had another two rows of storage units to rummage through.
We finally reached the last two units. To my delight these last two units contained maintenance supplies for our water purification system. There was an entire skid of the hard to find UV filters and other items that our system used.
“Oh my God!” I exclaimed. “This is the jackpot! Look at this!”
“Let’s start piling them in the back of the trailer. If there’s room in the vehicles tomorrow, hopefully, we’ll take everything back to the compound. If not, it isn’t too hard to get here from the compound. You really struck gold here, Em.”
We spent the next hour placing everything in the back of the snowplow and the U-Haul trailer. During that hour, an innate but nagging feeling of being watched caused me to pause occasionally, looking over my shoulder and across the windswept landscape. Initially I kept the persistent feeling to myself and maintained small talk with Derek. Finally I mentioned it to him.
“I know, I’ve been feeling it too. Remember what I said yesterday. Pay attention to your gut. If you feel like you’re being watched, then you probably are.”
The familiar feeling of dread and fear began to slowly worm its way across my mid-section. We paused at the trailer and surveyed our surroundings. There was nothing in the countryside around us to confirm or deny that we were being watched.
“It could be an animal. It could be other survivors but maybe they’re afraid to approach us.” I suggested but the very thought of being watched was already darkening my peaceful mood.
We wrapped up our task as the day began to fade and a cold wind started to blow. The clouds grew dark and heavy with snow. Eventually the feeling passed, whatever it was or whoever it was, had obviously moved on. Knowing that when we left the following day, we’d be leaving behind a trail right to our front door was beginning to trouble me.
We spent the night in much the same way as the previous one. Dining by candlel
ight once again, we enjoyed a meal of various canned goods. Washed down with the remnants of the whiskey bottle we spent the next few hours slowly and thoroughly exploring each other’s bodies. Satisfied again and again but physically spent, we settled in each other’s arms, quietly talking for another hour.
“Take note of your vulnerabilities. The weaknesses of your group and your compound. Find the weak points and find a way to make it stronger.” He said, massaging my shoulders.
“It’s our numbers. We don’t have enough people to maintain look outs on the perimeter. That’s what makes us vulnerable. Should we actively look for survivors? I thought we’d find some by now.”
“Either there aren’t any or they’re too scared. But yes, you should always be on the lookout for survivors. Friendly or unfriendly.”
“I’m afraid of the latter.” I replied with remorse.
“You’ve got a lot of benefits. You have the video feeds and someone is always watching the monitors. You have the high walls and they’re strong. You’ve got those platforms set up around almost the entire length and width of the wall. That gives you a good view of your surroundings. The best part, you’re in a pretty remote location, it’s out of sight of the major roadways. Myself, I would have never thought to take those routes. Unless someone is following you or has decided to keep off the main roads, no one will ever know you’re there.”
“What if we’re found by unfriendlies?” I asked.
“Hopefully that never happens. If it does, remember everything we taught you.”
He kissed the top of my head and gave my shoulders a little squeeze. “Get some rest. That’s an order.”
I snuggled down deep into the pile of blankets and moved as close to him as I could. I closed my eyes and forced myself to relive the intimate moments we’d shared again and again, hoping to keep the memories etched forever in my soul. I knew that once he was gone, we would never see each other again.
My feelings for Derek were mixed. I wasn’t quite sure what my heart was telling me. Had I fallen in love with him over the course of the past two months? Was this merely the result of an inborn human characteristic? The need for physical contact, the desire for companionship.
