by Nana Malone
“What the hell is going on here?”
Even though I couldn’t see Alexi, hearing his voice was enough to put me at ease. “I saw this woman here needed some help getting away from her idiot of a husband. Now he thinks it’s a good idea to manhandle me.”
The man advanced a step, and Alexi was at my side like a flash. “Sir Robert, my friend was just leaving.”
Whiskey Tango Foxtrot? Alexi knew this asshole? Anger made my voice waver, and I hated it. “He was going to hurt her. If I hadn’t stepped in—”
Ice dripped off of each of Alexi’s words. “Maybe you didn’t hear me, Abbie, but it’s time to go.”
I tore my arm loose from the oaf’s grip and glared at Alexi. Why the hell was he so furious with me? Had I broken some rich elite code? “I didn’t do anything wro—”
The woman beside me shook her head. “Oh, no. You must have misunderstood. We were just having an animated conversation. My husband would never hurt me.”
I stared at the redhead incredulously. He’d been gripping her so tight, I could see hints of bruising on the woman’s arms. But she was going to back up this asshat? I turned to face Alexi, and I saw they weren’t alone. Gemma and her mother had followed him.
The older woman stalked over to the red-headed woman. “Emily, Robert, you’ll have to forgive Alexi and Gemma’s guest. Obviously, she misunderstood and shouldn’t have gotten involved. Emily, why don’t I take you inside so you can freshen up?”
Alexi stood firm by my side, but I could feel the chasm between us widening. “I’m not lying, Alexi. He was going to hurt her.”
“Gemma, do me a favor and make sure Abbie gets the fuck out of here.”
The bottom fell out from my stomach. He doesn’t believe you. In his world, things like this are par for the course. And he was clearly pissed that I’d embarrassed him.
“You know what? Forget it. I’m done here anyway.” Hot tears spilled onto my cheeks as I stalked out of the garden.
Chapter 26
Abbie…
After an hour and a half of driving Tamsin’s car through the slogging rain, I let myself into the empty apartment. I tossed my keys on the kitchen counter and went straight for the wine. I knew Tamsin needed some time with her man, but right now I could really use my best friend.
After pouring myself a large glass with shaky hands, I quickly changed into sweats before sitting down with my laptop and turning on a DVR’d episode of Eastenders. But I wasn’t in the mood to attempt to look through any of the pictures.
But Tamsin was in Dublin with Liam and Sophie was off to Jersey with Max. So I was all alone for the first time since I’d come to London. It gave me too much time to think, and my brain replayed the scenario from the afternoon over and over and over again. Had I done the right thing? Yes. Should I have gone with some back up? Probably.
It had been foolish, but I was glad to have been able to get that poor woman away, even if it was just for the rest of the party. I’d have to make my own choices when I got home. Adrenaline still coursed through my body, making my hands shake, and I very deliberately took a big gulp of wine.
The front door buzzer sounded, and I dragged myself from the relative comfort of the couch. With wooden legs, I trudged over to the answer box and pressed the buzzer. “Who is it?”
“Abbie, it's Lex.”
Shit. What the hell was he doing here? I didn’t want to see that look on his face again. The fury and disbelief I wouldn’t soon forget. “Now's not a good time.”
“Abbie, I want to talk. Please let me up. I need to see that you’re okay.”
Oh, really? He hadn’t been too concerned about my well-being a few hours ago. At that point, he’d been more interested in keeping the fact secret that his close family friend was a wife beater. I depressed the buzzer again. “It's okay, honestly. I’m fine.”
Lex's smooth voice came over the speaker again. “Abbie, I’m begging you, just hear me out. Just for a minute? I'd rather not have this conversation out here for the whole world to hear.”
I’d rather not have it at all. But the truth was, I wanted to hear him out. Wanted to hear some explanation that would make up for what he’d done. Needed to hear that he believed me.
I buzzed him in and opened the door before taking back my post on the couch.
When he strode inside, the air left my lungs. Every time I left him, I literally forgot just how beautiful he was. And then, when I saw him again, it all came crashing into me. “What do you want, Alexi?” For the most part, I ignored him, only catching his exploration of my flat from the corner of my eye.
“I like your place. It's cozy and girly, but not in a bad way. You've got nice smelling stuff everywhere and actual grown up things. I bet your kitchen drawers are full of all kinds of cooking utensils I've never even heard about.”
I wasn't in the mood for his teasing. “Can you say whatever the hell you have to say and get out? I have to do some work.”
“Are you headed back to the library to print canvases? I could give you a ride and then—”
I cut him off with a look. “And then what? We'll nearly screw each other in the lab again? I'm not interested in being with someone who doesn’t trust what I say.”
He cursed as he sank down into the couch next to me. As he spoke, he ran a hand through his hair. “Is that what you think? You think I didn’t believe you?”
“You were clearly pissed at me. Look, I know that’s not how you people do things in the rich circles, but I saw someone who needed help, so I acted. You had no right to yell at me like that.”
He scrubbed a hand over his face. “I fucked up. I wasn’t yelling at you because I was angry with you. I just wanted you out of there so you wouldn’t see me lose my shit and give the arsehole a proper beating. I didn’t want you to see me like that.”
He hadn’t been angry with her? “But you looked furious. And the way you spoke to me. I-I thought…”
He shook his head. “I’m sorry that’s what you thought. I didn’t know if he would get violent, so I wanted you as far away from him as possible. When I saw his hands on you, it took every ounce of my control not to knock his teeth down his gullet. It made me want to lose control and hurt him. Bad. That man is a piece of work.”
I clutched the blanket tighter, leaning back as far away as the couch would allow and sniffled deep. “I thought you didn’t believe me.” I swiped at my nose with the back of my hand. “I’m not a liar, Lex.”
“I know. I swear I know that. I’m sorry. I wish I could explain. I saw him trying to hurt you and it was like my whole body seized. I wanted him dead,” he finished on a whisper.
Her body trembled.
“Abbie, why didn’t you just come in and get me when you saw them?” Frown lines marred the skin on his forehead.
You seemed busy. I swallowed the flare of jealousy. “Well, I didn’t really think. I just saw them and acted. He’s twice her size. I was worried he’d hurt her. I thought if he knew someone else was there and watching, he’d stop. I guess I was wrong.”
“That was dangerous. You can’t do things like that. You can get seriously hurt.”
He might have had a point, but I wasn’t letting it go. I glared at him. “I know. But I literally couldn’t stand by and watch and not do anything. I just kept thinking, what if—”
His voice lowered. “What if, what, Abbie?”
The tiny voice told me to shut the hell up. To not spill the nightmare that kept me up most nights. “Nothing.”
He took my hand in his, but I pulled it back. “Tell me, please. I want to understand. What if, what?”
I shook my head, unable to put voice to the pain I carried around. “Nothing, Alexi. Let it go.”
He shook his head. “No. If we’re going to do this, I want to know what’s scaring you. What aren’t you telling me? Whatever it is, I can take it.”
Her lungs constricted, and I thought they would explode if I d
idn’t just breathe and get it out. “I kept thinking what if someone had seen Evan with his hands on me. Could it have made a difference? Would it have stopped him from hurting me?” With the gates now open, I didn’t dare look at Lex. Instead, I dropped my head into my hands.
His voice was icy but barely audible when he spoke. “He hit you?”
I could only nod as sobs constricted my vocal cords. I could feel him nearly vibrating next to me.
“Is that why you’re so uncomfortable with touching?”
I wiped away the tears and forced myself to face him. If I could look at him now, maybe I was strong enough to face everything. “I-I don’t like surprise touches. Don’t really do hugging. I generally stay out of striking distance.” I shook my head. “I’ve never told anyone but my mother before.”
“And she didn’t have him arrested?”
My chuckle was harsh and mirthless. “She pretty much told me to suck it up. Told me how lucky I was that someone like Evan would want me. With his parents’ money and connections, I’d be set for life, if I could figure out how to keep him happy.”
“Fuck,” he muttered through clenched teeth. “I’m sorry, but I’m not a big fan of your mother’s.” He rubbed his jaw. “Wait, does he know where you are or how to find you?”
I shrugged. “He knows I’m in London. Not even my family knows exactly where to find me. But they have my number, and my mom gave it to him. I don’t know how the system works here. I’m more than a little worried he’ll show up to drag me home.”
Alexi hung his head. “Is the phone in Tamsin’s name?”
“No. Sophie’s. Why?”
“Well, most people port their numbers and take them with them. The system is so backward that it likely will have Sophie’s last known address attached to it. We can check on that.”
I shook. I’d hadn’t given any thought to Evan finding me. I should have taken more precautions. But then I reminded myself that the last time I’d seen him, he’d been on the business end of a knife. He wouldn’t likely underestimate me again. “I’ll need to check and change it if I can.”
“And every time I’ve seen you, I’ve given you no reason to not be afraid of me. I’ve practically mauled you every chance I’ve gotten.”
No. He couldn’t think that. “Alexi. Don’t. You’re the first man I haven’t been afraid of in six years.”
“Don’t do that, Abbie. Don’t gloss over how I’ve treated you. I knew something was up, but I pushed you too fast. Any time we’ve been alone, I’ve put my hands all over you. Jesus, I’m a prick.”
I put a hand on his knee. “Stop, Alexi.” The sound of his full name on my lips must have calmed him a little because the tension ebbed out of his shoulders. “From the moment you pulled me off the street, I’ve felt safe with you. In the thirty seconds I’d known you, my instincts told me I was safe with you. I knew you wouldn’t hurt me.”
“God, Abbie, I wish I’d known. I’ve probably been freaking you out these last couple of weeks.”
“No. You’ve been opening my eyes.” And that was the truth. I didn’t have to live in a constant state of fear with him. It was easier than it ever had been with Evan. Even though there was a hazy edge to Alexi, I’d known from the beginning he would never hurt me. Physically anyway.
“Can I ask you a question?” He gazed at me through lowered lashes.
Now that my deepest darkest secret was out, I didn’t have anything left to hide. “Yeah, shoot.”
“How did you get the courage to break up with him? Men like that are dangerous.”
“Well, what I told you was the truth. When I found out he hid my acceptance letter from me, hid my dream from me, I snapped. It’s like someone splashed ice-water on me, and I finally woke up.” I tipped my chin up. “He hit me for the last time that night. I pulled a knife on him and told him to get the hell out.”
His eyes bugged. “You pulled a knife?”
A faint smile pulled at my lips. “Yeah, I can’t believe it either. London was the dream I had been holding onto, and if he’d had his way, I would have never gotten to realize it. He made me feel like I wasn't deserving of it. That last time, as the pain ran through me and I could taste the blood in my mouth, I’d just had it. I knew if I stayed, he’d eventually really do some damage, so I turned on him with the knife I’d been using to cut the onions for lunch.” A nervous giggle escaped. “You should have seen the look on his face.”
“I can imagine. But, that was so dangerous. He could have really hurt you.”
Yes, he could have. But he’d already done enough to me. At the time I hadn’t been thinking about that. I’d only been thinking about getting him the hell away from me. “I suppose so. At any rate, I had the locks changed that night and packed. Told my sister to get movers for his stuff then rent my place out. And I ran here for a fresh start.”
Slowly, Lex scooted closer to me. He took care not to make any sudden moves but ever so slightly reach for my face, then stroked his thumb over my cheek. “Is it okay if I hold you for a minute? Your flatmates aren’t due back any time soon, are they?”
I turned my face into the caress. “It’s okay. Tamsin and Sophie are out of town for the weekend.”
He still didn’t move. “If I do anything to scare you, just tell me, okay?”
I nodded, and he gently drew me to him, tucking me against his chest. Together we lay there, and I let the sound of his heartbeat soothe me.
I wasn’t sure how long he held me before I had the courage to say, “I’m sorry I freaked out on you at the beginning of the party. Just seeing you two together, it was like seeing the picture that should be. I knew I didn’t belong.”
His fingers stroked my arms gently. “What do you mean?”
“I mean, look at you two. You fit. I’s beautiful and intelligent. And you two clearly grew up in the same circles. And I am none of those things. I can just see the disaster that would be our two families meeting. My crazy African relatives with their wild gesticulations, your very British and very reserved relatives. In my head, it’s total chaos. I know we don’t make very much sense together.”
He traced his knuckles over my cheek. “Gemma is my friend. Just a friend. I can’t think of anyone else but you. The way you laugh, the way you look at things with wonder, the way you taste. And as far as crazy family goes, don’t forget my drunken Russian relatives and the crazy Turkish ones. We fit, Abbie. I don’t want you thinking that we don’t.”
His seductive voice rolled over me, and I tried to hold fast, but his hand had transitioned from my cheek to the back of my neck, and he was massaging the knotted muscles there. Coaxing me toward him. “Alexi, I—”
“Abbie, I want to be here with you. More than I want anything else. But I don’t want to push too fast or too hard.”
I shook my head. “You’re not pushing me.”
He pulled me up for a kiss. The brush of his lips against hers was soft and gentle. Completely undemanding. Just pleasant with a hint of electricity.
I drew back a little to meet his gaze, like the night he'd first kissed me. But unlike that night, I went back for more, and I melded my mouth to his. I wanted this. Had since I'd met him. There were still some things to work out, but for once, I wasn’t going to overthink things to death.
Lex slid his tongue into my mouth and stroked hers. The syncopated rhythm had my blood boiling in seconds. He dragged my leg over his lap so I sat straddling him. The thick ridge of his erection melded against my hot core, and I moaned at the contact.
Oh, Jesus. Need and lust wove a heady blanket around us, leaving us completely oblivious to the surrounding world. The television became a distant memory as soon as his hand stole up my sweatshirt, closing around my breasts through my tank top. His thumb rolled over my nipple, and I shivered as I tried desperately to climb closer to him.
He dragged his lips from hers, and his breath came in ragged gulps. “Shit. Abbie. You are completely undoing m
e. I can’t think straight.”
Loving the heady feeling of making him lose control, I worked my hips again, and Alexi cursed against my lips. Leveraging us both off the couch, he secured my legs around his waist, then muttered, “Where’s your bedroom?”
I stiffened momentarily. I wanted this. Wanted this with him. And this was Lex, he wasn’t going to hurt me. “Uhm, down the hall at the end.”
He nipped my lips playfully again. “You’re safe with me.”
I slid my hands into his hair and tugged gently. “I want this to happen. I want to know what it feels like to lose control with you.”
He groaned and laid his forehead against hers. “You're killing me. You're not supposed to tell me that. Now I'm even less likely to behave myself.”
“I don’t think I want you to behave.”
His eyes flared, and his hands flexed on my ass. “Are you sure?”
I nodded. “Just once. I want to go after what I want. And you’re what I want.”
It took him seconds to get down to my room, and with a yank of my door, he had me deposited on my bed in even less time. He followed me down, leaning his body against hers. He nuzzled my neck first with his nose, then took quick, tiny, love bites. I clutched him to me.
Lex sat back and studied my face. He drank in the sight of me. “Do you have any idea how beautiful you are?”
I quickly averted my gaze, and he tipped a finger under my chin to bring the attention back to him.
“I mean it.”
Lex traced the back of his fingertips against my cheek. Her eyelids fluttered closed as I waited for the kiss. When none came, I opened my eyes to catch him watching me. “What?”
He shook his head. “I'm just looking at you. I want to freeze this moment in time.”
When he kissed me, his mouth was soft, as if asking for permission. The tip of his tongue edged over my lips, and I parted them. In slow delicious licks, he explored my mouth, sliding his tongue against hers. Comingling their breaths. Devouring me.
He tugged me up on the bed and smoothed his hands over my arms until I raised them over my head. Slowly, he tugged off my sweatshirt, then my tank top leaving me in just my bra and sweatpants. For a long second, he stared at me. He traced his fingertips over the overflowing lace cups of my bra just as I reached behind my back and unsnapped it. Her breasts spilled forward, and Alexi groaned.
