I shook my head, and his gaze dipped.
Diesel brought his hand to my hair, loose around my shoulders. He brushed it back, his fingertips skimming my skin, and I shivered. His lips lifted, and even in the dim lighting, I could see the twin crescents framing his chiseled mouth.
“Maybe I’ll buy some headphones when you take me shopping tomorrow.”
“Tomorrow is today already,” he said softly, “but that won’t help you now.”
He continued sifting through my hair. I didn’t shiver again. My entire body was shimmering with warmth as if my skin were shrink-wrapped in sunshine.
He seemed reluctant to leave. I certainly was in no hurry for him to go anywhere.
“Can you stay here with me? Just for a little while?”
“I can. How about I sing something for you? A Hawaiian song. My grandfather taught it to my father, and my father taught it to me. It’s called ‘Aloha ’Oe.’”
Diesel’s eyes drifted closed as he sang. His rich, melodic baritone soothed me like the sound of the ocean repeatedly washing up against the sandy shore. The words were mostly in another language, but it didn’t matter. From his inflections alone, I knew it was a serious song, a somber one. Love found and then potentially lost forever after an exchange of heartfelt promises.
“It’s beautiful. Like a hymn.” I yawned and closed my eyes as he began to sing it again. “What does it mean?”
“It’s a hello and good-bye to a true love.”
“I thought so. I won’t ever have that again,” I said, and Diesel’s fingers stilled in my hair for a moment before resuming.
“Yeah, me either. Love’s just a pretty word. It doesn’t mean anything.”
Chapter Fourteen
* * *
Diesel
Later, I stood at the foot of the bed, watching Hollie sleep.
Satisfaction surged inside me that she slumbered so soundly, but frustration rode me just as hard. After leaving the disappointing blonde at the bar, I’d come home to an empty bed, tossing restlessly, only to be woken by the one I truly wanted to fuck.
The sun wasn’t up yet, and Hollie’s platinum hair spilled over the orange bed linens like a moonbeam while one of her pale, shapely legs peeked out from under the botanical coverlet. Her skin looked so smooth that I longed to trace it. The faded Dirt Dogs T-shirt of mine that she wore had never looked better.
My fingertips tingled with the desire to remove it and anything she had on underneath it. I would wake her with caresses and long, steady strokes. My cock jumped in eagerness, loving that plan.
I cursed under my breath, knowing I wouldn’t take anything until she gave it to me fully conscious.
“Wake up. It’s morning.” I tugged on her dainty foot.
“Go away,” she mumbled adorably, then yanked the sheet so fast over her head that the cotton snapped.
“Up, Hollie. Now,” I said in a commanding tone.
She sat up fast, and I nearly swallowed my tongue. All those curves in motion, she was sexier than any porno. Her face was flushed, and her hair draped in a silken waterfall over her body.
“What time is it?” she asked, her eyes sexily hooded as she regarded me.
“Time to get up.”
She turned her head toward the window where the solid darkness was transforming to distinctive shadows, her blush-pink lips pouted. “It’s too early.”
I suddenly had a new priority. Kissing her first, then fucking her.
“Out of bed.” I whipped the covers completely away and then walked out.
“Diesel.” Her tone was plaintive. Even that, I liked.
“Get dressed.”
I paused in the doorway to glance back at her. Her gaze rose and she licked her lips. I’d bet money she’d been staring at my ass.
“Dressed in what? I don’t have any clothes.”
“Yes, you do. C’mon. You’re going down to the beach to watch me surf.”
“I can watch you from the porch.”
“Huh-uh.” Man, she was stubborn in the morning. “You need some ocean therapy and sunshine. There was a bikini in one of those grocery bags with all the lotion and girly shit. Didn’t you see it?”
“I saw it. Barely.” Hollie squinted her metallic gaze at me. “It’s pretty small.”
I grinned. There had been larger sizes. It was probably a size too small, but it would cover enough of her assets that she wouldn’t get arrested. At least, not on the semiprivate section of the beach in front of the house.
“Quit stalling.”
“All right, but you’re not gonna stand there and watch me put it on,” she said haughtily, arching one brow.
“Oh yeah? And how do you plan to stop me?” I planted my feet and crossed my arms over my chest.
Wearing a determined look and not much else, she got out of bed and stomped toward me.
This should be good. The preshow with her unbound breasts jiggling and her hips swaying already had me hard.
“Go. Get out.”
She lifted her hands and pushed at my bare chest. Ineffectively. I didn’t budge, of course, but my cock swelled to legendary proportions. Her gaze dipped, and either she registered her own spike of adrenaline from the physical contact, or she noted the flagpole in my board shorts.
She drew in a sharp breath.
“You were saying?” I said gruffly, reminding her—and myself—that we had shit to do that didn’t involve me throwing her back into the bed and plowing my cock inside her pussy.
Yet.
“I . . . um.” She lifted her gaze.
The connection between us—her hands on my bare skin and her eyes on mine—gave me another type of rush entirely. This close, I could see so much in her eyes. A sheen of dewy lust. A lot of vulnerability. A hidden hope. The heat of desire.
“Shoo.” Hollie dropped her hand, and her gaze, leaving me feeling bereft. “You’re being a pest. You want to see me in the bikini? You want to surf before nighttime. Then get out.” She stepped to the side and grabbed the door.
“Okay, little blackmailer.”
I didn’t know what I’d said, but a shadow darkened her expression in response to my teasing. I moved out of her way, feeling it in my gut when she immediately closed the door and clicked the lock.
Fuck.
“Don’t take long,” I warned her. “Or I’ll break the door down. I’m not fooling.”
“I hear you.” Her footsteps faded as she moved away from the door.
I moved away too. I had breakfast to prepare.
From my spot in the kitchen, I heard her door open a few moments later, and she mumbled something about me being an ass. I grinned. Then the door to the hallway bathroom next to her bedroom clicked shut and the tap came on.
I finished chopping and carried the tray with everything on it out to the porch. She joined me a few moments later as I was waxing my board.
“Holy shit!” I froze in midmotion with the bar of surf wax in my hand. Living on an island, I’d seen a lot of bodacious babes in bikinis, but I’d never seen one that beat Hollie.
“What’s wrong?” That cute little crease formed between her delicate auburn brows. I realized that line meant that she felt vulnerable.
“Nothing’s wrong. Everything’s fucking right.”
Freshly scrubbed pretty face, moonbeam hair pulled back in a ponytail, and her sexy curves overflowing the tiny triangular scraps of fabric the same light brown color as the outside of the coconut I’d cut open this morning. She wasn’t just right; she was perfect.
“I’ve just never seen any chick look that good in a bikini.”
“Thank you.” Hollie’s flattened lips unfurled like a flower kissed by the sun as she beamed a beatific smile.
Holy shit. I thought it this time, noting to compliment her more often.
“What’s all this?” She stepped closer, glancing down and running her hand along the edge of the tray.
“Pineapple. Banana. Coconut.”
“I know
what it is. But where’d you get it, and who cut it all up and arranged it like this?”
“Got it from the yard. I sliced it. It wasn’t hard to do.”
The way she was looking at me made my heart speed up like it did when I was on my surfboard and dipped over the edge of a perfect six-footer, right into a really righteous barrel.
“Eat it, babe. Don’t look at me like I performed a miracle.”
“All right.” She popped a banana slice in her mouth and immediately squeezed her eyes shut. “Mmm.” She opened them and licked her lips, reaching for another couple of slices and a chunk of pineapple. “This tastes so much better than it does back home.”
“Sun-ripened makes all the difference.” My cock lengthened as she moaned again over a piece of pineapple this time.
“Mmm.” She placed a sliver of coconut into her mouth next, and her lids fluttered in ecstasy.
“Babe.” I shifted to adjust myself. “You’re killing me.”
“How so?” Licking juice from her fingers, Hollie focused her gaze on me.
Really? After all the guys she’d been linked to since she’d gotten into acting, she really wanted me to believe she didn’t know what she was doing to me?
I stalked closer, and she craned her neck to keep my face in view. Beyond her confusion, there wasn’t a single hint of coyness in her gaze.
Fuck me. Licking my own lips and watching her gaze follow my tongue, I swallowed hard.
“How many guys you been with, babe?”
The openness in her gaze slammed shut and she glanced away. I had my answer, though I think I’d suspected all along.
“All those costars from way back when, it was just made-up shit for publicity,” I said, throwing my suspicion out there.
She nodded.
“Just you and the bodyguard.”
Her eyes filling, she dropped her chin to her chest.
“Holy hell.”
Her revelation made me feel all kinds of things. More jealousy toward the douche, understanding about her easy embarrassment about sexual things, but also a lot of confusion about the cues she gave me while never backing down to the shit I threw at her. Her lack of experience was a total turn-on. Refreshingly so after all the jaded women I’d met and all the tired, practiced propositions I’d fielded over the years.
“Thanks for doing all this.” Her gaze lifted, and her eyes narrowed as she studied me.
“It’s just a bunch of fruit.” I shoved down deep the things I didn’t want her to see. “It’s not a big deal.”
“It is to me. No one’s ever taken care of me like this.”
Hollie’s eyes glistened like the sun sparkled on the spray when I shot out of a really sweet barrel. The elation I felt from just looking at her was ridiculously similar.
“You grew up in a mansion with a bunch of servants.”
“I did.” A shadow dampened the sparkle. “It wasn’t the blissful life you think it was. The staff were paid to take care of me and make my meals. But you did this just for us to share. It’s nice.”
Rocking my world with her simple compliment and not even seeming to realize it, she casually reached for another pineapple chunk and popped it into her mouth.
“It’s not kindness. It’s selfishness, plain and simple. You need hydration and carbs for surfing and fucking.”
I was being an ass, yet I pressed forward. Hollie didn’t need to know how easily she could affect me.
Chapter Fifteen
* * *
Hollie
“I can see where that might be the case. Activities like that require a lot of calories for fuel,” I said, acknowledging Diesel’s statement but refusing to overreact. He wasn’t going to get a rise out of me. “But just so you know up front, I’m not getting in the water.”
I glanced at the ocean where waves were beginning to lift and turn over, the sun seeming to agitate them as it peeked above the horizon.
“Oh yes, you most certainly are.” He set his board down, leaned it against the railing, and turned toward me.
“No, I’m not.” I lifted my chin but kept him in view as he stalked closer. This wasn’t negotiable. People drowned in the ocean. My mother. Max.
Diesel cocked his head to the side and reached out to stroke his thumb across my forearm. I’d crossed my arms, wrapping them protectively around my body. His gaze dipped as his thumb swirled, raising more chill bumps on my skin.
Did he notice how fast my pulse thrummed from his caress? That more than just the ocean scared me?
“What are you afraid of?” He lifted his gaze, ensnaring me.
“Drowning.”
“No one’s ever drowned on this beach.”
“That’s good to know. I won’t worry so much about you while you’re out there. But I’m not getting in. I’ll stay right here at the shore and watch you.”
“You’ll miss out on a lot of potential fun if you let your fear rule you.”
“But I’ll stay alive.”
Pain sliced through me from multiple wounds as I remembered what the sea had taken from me. I was also processing another emotion. Guilt. How could I stand here wanting Diesel when I shouldn’t feel anything but sadness?
“Is it really living if you restrict yourself to what’s comfortable?” he asked. “To the familiar, safe confines of a tiny little box? Or is it a cage?”
I froze like a block of ice, even in the tropical heat. The waves lapped the shore while I stared into the compelling eyes of a man who had a knack for speaking plain but profound truths that often shook the foundation I thought was firm beneath me.
In the beginning, the frame for Max and me had seemed like such a good idea. But implementing it had been impractical, and in the end, impossible.
“Hollie.” Diesel’s eyes narrowed. “Are you okay?”
“I’m fine,” I replied automatically, though it was a lie. My chest was so tight I could barely breathe.
“I don’t believe you. You’re really pale. Paler than usual.” He moved close, sliding his fingers underneath my elbows.
My skin tingled with awareness that I was never going to get accustomed to with him. I wasn’t prepared for the way Diesel made me feel or his truths. I wondered if it were even possible to form a defense against him.
“You’re right. I’m not fine.” My resistance melted beneath the intensity in his eyes that were a more reddish-brown right now, like burnt umber. “How can I be? My life’s a wreck.”
“A wreck can be salvaged,” he said softly.
Sliding his hands around to my back, he pulled me into him, and I let go of my hold on myself and reached for him instead. My arms around his waist, I laid my cheek against his solid chest and sagged into him. Tension rolled out of me as I breathed in his enticing scent and absorbed his welcome heat.
“It just takes time.” His words rumbled into my ear. “Give yourself some time to fit the pieces together. You’ll sort it out.”
One of his large hands pressed firmer into my lower back, and the other slowly glided up my spine. His long fingers dipping underneath my ponytail, he gently cradled my head, his thumb swirling soothing circles into the sensitive skin at my nape.
Diesel was so strong, so certain of himself, and a lot of the time, so fiercely confrontational. But last night with the singing to help me sleep, and right now with the comfort he offered me, he was so unexpectedly, irresistibly tender.
“Time. You’re right. I know it in my head. The rest of me just needs to catch up.” I released him and eased away. It was more difficult to disengage from him than it had been to engage.
My decision to sleep with Diesel might remain in doubt. I was pregnant, and he didn’t know. I didn’t want him to know. He only did casual, one-night hookups.
We might burn down the night if we were ever together, but I knew I would get hurt. I’d tossed and turned last night for hours, knowing he’d been with someone else. We didn’t have any real ties to each other, but I couldn’t lie to myself. It had both
ered me. My stomach churned again at just the thought of it.
I had no hold on him. I didn’t think anyone could hold Diesel unless he wanted them to. But I was certain of something, and as that knowledge seeped through me, it was gratifying to acknowledge one thing I didn’t need any additional time to sort out.
I liked Diesel.
I liked him a lot. And I wasn’t going to keep building a wall against that fact and banging my head against it. In that, at least, I was going to remove the barriers and just go with the flow as he’d suggested.
“So since it’s agreed that I’m not going in the water . . .”
Diesel frowned at me, obviously disagreeing. Too bad. If he didn’t already know, he’d soon learn I was just as stubborn as he was.
“. . . I’ll wrap up the rest of this fruit and put it in the fridge while you head out. And then I’ll find a towel, take one of these mugs of coffee down to the beach and find a good shady spot, and I’ll watch you for a while. Okay?”
Seeming to consider, he tilted his head at that deep angle that made his glossy black curls skim his shoulder. My stomach predictably flipped.
How soft is his hair? How would it feel in my grip or against my skin? I shifted my bare feet on the wooden floor, feeling flushed and restless while he stared at me with that unnerving intensity of his.
His eyes narrowed as his voice rumbled. “You’re under the mistaken impression that your will is equal to mine.”
“You’re mistaken if you think it’s not.” My spine snapping straight, I put my hands on my hips.
Diesel’s gaze dipped to my chest. “You want what I want.”
His eyes darkened and his lips curved when his gaze rose again to meet mine. I felt like he could read my thoughts.
“We’ll play it your way for a while.” He stepped toward me and leaned in close.
An enticing tropical blend of coconut, plumeria, and pineapple scents swirled around me, along with a dizzying amount of his warmth and masculine musk.
“But before I go . . .” His expression sharpening, he reached out and touched the pad of his thumb to the outer edge of my mouth.
“What are you doing?” I whispered, my heart galloping as he stared at me and swept his thumb across my cheek.
(Complete Rock Stars, Surf and Second Chances #1-5) Page 123
